My Time Away ~ Receiving Far More Than I Sought


From anchored home to tiny house on wheels.

From car to bike.

From grounded yard to mini traveling garden.

From simplifying life to a more expanded me.

From inhuman acts of strength to deeper connection and peace.

From trusted unknowns to manifested reality.

From dreaming and believing to shooting stars and rainbows.

From hearing about fears and illusions to experiencing magick plants, butterflies, animals, and beings.

From soul exhaustion to reinvigorated inspiration.

From personal love to harmonious love.

From forgotten to remembered.

From who I was to who I am.

From one reality to another.

Yes, it’s been quite an eventful, full, enriching, and rewarding three months.

While I hate to provide too much reading material, I’ve also been away so long, I felt some bit of chronicling may be in store. People can choose to read or not…or use it as reading material for your little daily break fun.

It always seems that people share with me that the things I go through or share about are helpful to them and mirror or reflect things they’re experiencing or were wondering about.

A way to feel we’re all in this together. And perhaps a way to inspire more of what you’re currently doing and/or thinking about doing.

Sharing with you in this way reiterates your own internal messaging.

So, I’ll highlight some snippets, touching in more detail upon some things in upcoming posts and/or videos. I’m not expressing all of the things I’ve experienced, nor the symbolism, but that may be evident as you experience the journey with me.

Everything imparts meaning I believe.

I’ll also just focus this blog share on personal experiences and mention this month’s and upcoming offerings in a separate blog.

A similar newsletter is forthcoming too in the next day or so, but is for those who aren’t necessarily readers here on my blog. Sorry for the overlap, if in fact you receive both updates. Newsletters are more limited and condensed, so here on my blog I can share more in depth and share things like photos.

peter rabbit2That said, it IS wonderful to be back in the depth of myself as a pilgrim of the Cosmos and living and journeying in our RV at this time in my life is perfectly resonating with who I am and what is next in this life experience.

Plus, it mirrors my joy of exploring, only here it is Earth-based. 😉

I keep referring to the RV as my Earthly “spaceship,” traveling and wandering to foreign and new destinations, as an extension of my sacred life ritual where everything is a walking meditation without need for formalities.

We actually just received the name of our RV four days ago and are giddy to be living and traveling in “The Magick Bus” now. She’s already proven to be quite magickal and even received a cosmic upgrade several nights ago – on Gratitude Day in fact. More on that later.

I do have to honestly say, however, it is challenging to be returning, as I do so LOVE my ever-more connected, while disconnected time. 🙂 So, bear with me as I slowly transition back.

I’m still in a cocoon. Merely popping my head out, while parts are still in transmutation mode before the wings fully spread…again. 😉 Transformation is an eternal journey.

I will, however, be adjusting my weeks now that I am back, to accommodate still much needed inward time.

While a lot was accomplished during my time off, I have only but scratched the surface of my personal projects that I’m being guided to bring through. And in feeling the timing and importance to them, I will be continuing to bring them to light.

This means that while I am back online and back to “work” and service offerings, I am still going to be maintaining a personal balance much greater than before my sabbatical and keeping very focused.

I am likely going to break up my week with half of it for working with others and half of it channeling my projects – something like 3 days others/4 days personal. This will help avoid having to block out several months, again, of complete cut-off – at least for now. 😉

But back to the last 3 months and a little recap of things I experienced, while I know many of you were also experiencing a great deal of changes and deepening.

Some may seem mundane, but all of it was meaningful.

First, to clear things up, as I can tell there’s been some confusion as to what these three months away were about.

I wasn’t actually “away”, except for two small trips we took in the RV to Las Vegas and Sequoia National Park – huge contrast and paradox there!!

I was merely “away” from the public, from being online, unavailable to others…etc. I needed personal time and space to recharge, receive, channel, manifest, and accomplish important ground work for the next phase of the journey. Not to mention, was focusing my energy to manifest how we would be leaving in the time period I felt guided that we needed to.

When originally I planned my 3 months off, it was before I even knew the RV intention would happen. Of course, as I’ve shared before, if you want something to happen you need to actually step into it with action, trust, and belief.

So, in fact my creating that 3 month period heralded the spiraling effect of my/our dream manifesting quickly. And synchronously so, as I would not have been able to accomplish the things needed and the move into the RV from the house without having blocked off time for just me.

While, this took more than half my sabbatical time to focus on, I can assure you it was perfect and during the time I was involved with packing, organizing, cleaning out, making piles for the RV, for long-term storage, for consignment, for donation, for gifting away….it was ALL a sacred ritual.

I don’t make separations in my life between the sacred and non-sacred…it is ALL sacred and can all be a magickal process, ritual, way of alchemically creating and manifesting.

While I engaged in these seemingly mundane processes, and extremely physically demanding (as we had the craziest hot end of summer/beginning of fall with humidity levels at all-time high and no a/c in the house – until the last 2 weeks lol!), I was receiving a ton and putting into place all of the pieces firmly, from which we’d be creating from.

It was during that first part of my time off (between September 1st and October 13th) that inhuman acts of physical adrenaline and strength kicked in to accomplish it all.

This enabled a 2-day-early embarking date, as we originally were to be out of the house for the family/friends renting it, on October 15th, but instead were out on the 13th.

Not planned, but hey! When you’re working in alignment, the Cosmos just so happens to align you with a New Moon on your day of embarking.

And so it was that every large move/change we made/make would continue to be in alignment with the Moon phases – never once intended or planned.

I also had somehow accomplished everything I needed in order to begin September 1st with a clean slate, ending all of my work and correspondence on the evening of August 31st.

I can’t begin to share how dramatically I felt the energy shift that next morning of September 1st. I literally felt everything roll off of me, so much peace, release, freedom, lightness…no agenda. It was incredible. I seemed to expand in that moment I woke on the first day of my sabbatical.

As mentioned, my September was spent packing, organizing, donating, selling, and creating piles for different things. Not to mention whatever else life throws at ya.

I even painted the whole house and got the front and back garden ready for their new caretakers, transplanting, planting….taking care to leave the house beautiful and loved for the new family, while creating it all as an act of sacredness and gratitude.

Everything was, everything IS, a ritual because I always intend them to weave magick into the new.

During this time I found that I no longer need to work in the way I may have before with manifesting or energy stuff or even any kind of process and specific ritual, although I can if I so choose or to make an intentional point.

There’s like an alignment of alchemy within that happens simply by the depth of clarity, pureness of heart, and intention. So it’s not a process anymore, although when we speak about it, it seems that way, when rather it’s a natural extension of being.

And it IS a way of life and being. It’s instant. Of course because I’ve been doing the work – a LOT of it over the years of my life.

While there was a lot of physical work I did during that time period, it was also incredibly exciting and freeing. I LOVE getting rid of things and I LOVE organizing.

The little ones – bunnies and kitties – were all feeling the changes too, but were troopers and kept supporting mom with everything while they energetically prepared along with me.

September 24th – 28th then came rolling around and became our first trip we took in the RV, which just so happened to fall during the Full Blood Moon Eclipse.

Again, not planned, but was the only time we could get away and got things prepared enough to do so, including the first round of RV fixes completing right before we left.

We set off to Las Vegas, which is SO not a “me” place, but it was the closest place in Nevada that we could get all of our registrations and domicile changes made, since Nevada will be our domicile while we travel for the next couple of years.

My family lives in Reno where I lived previously, and it’s the only “home” base we can manage easily. One of the things full-time RVers have to think about and choose when they set off to live the nomad life – a domicile and means of receiving mail and such.

Anyway, the trip was very focused and we got a lot done, including DMV trips, upgrades inside the RV that we worked on ourselves while stationed there, visited some great vegan restaurant finds, shared an evening with friends that live there, and a day of hiking in Red Rock Canyon one day.

20150927_170422_resized20150927_170445_resizedDave even dipped in and revisited his poker days for fun once and won…he’s a past professional/seasoned and winning poker player. For both of us, these kind of things are ways to dip in and out of experiences without the “charge” and experience them from a different perspective than once would have been.

However, it was a strange dichotomy  of things to actually be there since I’m everything NOT Vegas and really have no resonance there and very sensitive to the energies and smoke they try to filter.

But we had a lot of interesting things take place including a power outage on 9/25. This happened on our second DMV trip, which would have been the last.

LITERALLY, and I mean LITERALLY two minutes before our paper work was almost processed (Dave and I somehow ended up at side-by-side stations), all of the power went out at the DMV and throughout the nearby neighborhoods. My passport had just been put into the system scan. Hmmm. 😉

At that moment a service truck had hit a tree that took down a power line.

LOL! Talk about timing!

It was like a reset in totality…but beyond just us.

The whole trip was like a reset, being in different dimensions and things seeping through from other dimensions, and like we were there to help harmonize and stabilize energies during the potent Blood Moon Eclipse, as well as leaving the old fully and transmuting it.

Vegas to me is the epitome of a certain kind of reality…one I don’t personally choose to live in, but definitely holds the pieces to transmute since it holds a certain energy not to repress, but understand.

Anyway, we made it back from our first successful RV run and the beginning of October marked a new vibrational embodiment for me.

Between 10/1 and 10/4 I was guided to down all of my crystal elixirs I had on hand, as they weren’t to be taken with me or stored, and not to slowly do in doses at this point.

So, I basically drank 2 – 4 oz bottles at a time…up to about 2 bottles a day.

Woo! I kept saying that I literally became a crystal…face flushes on the first day and all. This seemed to be part of my preparation for the next phase and to start fully anew without any old carried over…really help kick in a new embodiment and life…again like a reset into my most natural me.

Now, I don’t recommend this be done. I’m not advocating others should do this too. Nor is what I did something to be duplicated unless it’s right for you after all consulting with yourself or any professionals.

Only you know what is right for you and by all means, if you have any medical challenges or concerns, consult your doctors or naturopaths with ANY thing you undertake.

I was guided to do this and have no medical challenges, as well as can handle a ton of energy because I’m used to it. So again, take what I’m saying with a grain of salt, as it is simply MY experience that I went through.

Anyway…

I managed to create about 3 days of writing time while I was waiting for movers, consignment people, house cleaners, etc. to finalize the move. And this also felt like the way to open the channels further and get a momentum going for later.

So I did get some awesome writing time in while just about to leave our home of the last nearly 4 years.

I also managed, during the last two weeks at the house and the first week in RV, to have some Sun Oven fun! I got it set up and did the initial cleaning to prep it, then tried a few things.

20151007_143741_resizedI think I mentioned that I got a Sun Oven for the RV journey ahead, but to have even later, in the next home we’ll set up.

And boy is it awesome, just as Laura had shared with me. So much better than a conventional oven!! Everything is moist, energized, and enriched.

So far I’ve made mango coconut bread, chocolate orange pecan cookies, gluten free black bean brownies with chocolate chips and pecans (a mix sent to me by Laura), coconut rice, and blueberry pie – all vegan of course and tremendously yum and easy!

20151007_143806_resized_120151007_200801_resized_120151026_125901_resized_120151105_204706_resized_1I’ve also acquired a small, portable fire pit/grill, awesome roasting sticks that extend out like 32″ and rotate, a cloudy day mini stove from the Sun Oven company, and a supply of cloudy day fire starter cubes, which rock by the way. We’ve used them all since living in the RV and it’s so much fun.

Yep, I’m really getting into this lifestyle!!

On 10/9 my dear friend and Reiki student, Nikki, that moved in with her sweet family came over so that we could do a huge ceremony and blessing for the house, as a means to pass it on, share gratitude, and infuse it and both families’ intentions with lots of magickal energy.

This ceremony included my five original paintings of the In Lak’ech series…one of which is now hanging in the house with its new family.

Joy had made herself present in the living room by the paintings, awaiting to assist, and I was guided to bring Cosmo in as well. He sat between us and aided the ceremony too.

It was the first time the original paintings had been seen and utilized all together, as they had been meant to. To say it was potent was an understatement. Nikki said she got energy rushes, and felt something strong in her throat, as I shared about the paintings before we began.

The ceremony was an incredible experience all around and lasted about an hour. It was very special to us both and I’m so happy that Reiki will continue on in the house, as Nikki will be starting to teach officially come the start of the New Year. Yay!

I even made it official, filling out a house blessing certificate, in my role as Minister of the Universal Life Church Monastery (something I take to heart very seriously), which they plan to hang. 🙂

Then suddenly Dave and I got the idea to leave earlier than planned, just as one day at the beach we got the message that it was time to get the RV and rent the house, even though we had no idea how the rest would unfold.

Always following the nudge and voice inside.

So on 10/13 we decided to leave instead of on the 15th.  

We ended up never having to store the RV and spend money on that, as between the time it was in the shop getting all the upgrades and fixes, and our short Vegas trip, and the four times we we had it parked out front the house when first getting it, before and after Vegas, and after getting back from final work done, it aligned perfectly timing-wise. (You can only store RV out front of your house on the street for 48 hours where we lived.)

Of course the New Moon supported everything with that, without us planning it.

I was running back and forth the last couple of days like crazy, loading up and organizing the RV in the humid heat and without a/c running in RV since it was parked out front of the house. (We did end up getting a/c installed in the house for the renters to be comfortable, which provided reprieve for that short period for me. However, it was AFTER I’d done all the hard work LOL!! (Test of what we’re truly capable of when things are challenging.)

We ended up arriving to the RV park in Newport Beach after 8pm on the 13th. It was dark, which makes it challenging in a park where you have to back in and spaces are tight.

But, as usual support would be there, since we were working with the energies and not against them – totally always letting things guide us rather than dictating. Intention and natural flow were/are as one in our processes now.

When we arrived to our site, a young guy had just pulled up (a neighboring RVer) and jumped out of his car to help us back in with his cell phone flashlight, directing the process.

Right after, I got in the car to park it and what do you know?

A large rabbit showed up in my car spot lights. I never saw a rabbit at our home – although saw every other kind of animal including possum and raccoon – but here was a rabbit to greet me/us, carrying the magick of the New Moon and like a supportive “wink” that all is well and all is in Divine order.

Yep, Nestor (my dear departed twin and rabbit in this life) was showing up, as she often does and so I stopped for a couple of minutes just connecting with the rabbit that stood there staring at and communing with me.

“Thank you,” I said, with a choked up smile in my heart.

The next day I returned to the house to handle last things with the cleaning crew. I took advantage of the time they cleaned the house to sit in the garden out back. It was finally, and luckily cooler and gray, enabling me to do so.

I spent those few hours just being at peace and sharing gratitude for the house and the garden…all of the beings that were part of the journey there…explored and said bye to the plants, took a last harvest that was ready of a few items from the tower and trees (to enjoy in the RV) and said goodbye to Gaia’s sanctuary under the now crazy plumeria hybrid plant.20151014_170735_resized_1

20151006_134750_resizedSince her disappearance it had grown immensely, and is supported by her wood house that still remains under it where she disappeared. The plumeria used to just be a pink, but now there are dark magenta plumeria that change to pale pink, whitish pink, AND yellow plumeria all growing from the same plant. Wild!

That’s Gaia for ya!

And so, we’ve been living in the RV ever since October 13th, but stationed in Newport Beach, California where within the first couple of weeks enjoyed amazing sunrises from our tiny house on wheels and even caught a half-rainbow ringed moon one evening – incredible! (photo blurs it, but in person it was a crystal clear rainbow half ring)20151025_065145_resized_1

20151103_062727_resized20151023_190323_resized_1Although we’ve been grounded here, except for our recent and second RV trip, it’s been an incredible shift and infusion of joy for us.

There were still things to situate and life stuff to attend to that kept the next couple of weeks quite busy and still focused on really getting everything set up for journeying.

I’ve embraced patience, knowing everything is in divine alignment and if I continue to listen and move with the energy, rather than force anything, it will all continue to work out.

I’m not sure if you remember, but we had no idea how the pieces of the rest of the plan would come together in terms of our ability to actually be traveling full time and not need to be here for any reasons, but as I kept telling everyone who asked, and even Dave who wondered, it WILL all come together.

We didn’t need to know the how’s, we didn’t need to force, worry, spend time fixated in analyzing…We just needed to keep moving forward with each piece presented in the moment…trusting the nudges and acting upon them.

I didn’t care what the situation was presently and that people looked at us like okay, yeah, let’s see how that will happen….I just knew it would.

When I’m adamant about something, which comes from total alignment with my higher self and the cosmic flow of energies, I KNOW things WILL come to be.

I am only to keep trusting in that knowing and feeling, keep embodying the new, keep taking each step forward, and not allow myself to be sucked into or to embody other people’s doubts and fears. I can just have compassionate understanding of where that comes from, integrate the meaning, and continue forward strongly in order to stay true to my vibration and reflect what is possible for others when they step into theirs.

So, while I can’t share the details, I can just say that step, by step, by step, every piece of the puzzle put itself together (despite nobody knowing how).

And ALSO, just like I felt would happen, I’d be announcing the official embarking date once I emerged from my sabbatical.

I’ll share that in closure, but since moving permanently into the RV a lot more things kept happening, which includes selling my car and purchasing a brand new bike.

Originally I was going to store my car at my parent’s house for the time we’re away, but one day while driving to donate items I was getting rid of, I got that my beloved car must go.

And as soon as I got that flash newscast in my energetic radar, I clicked in with “Okay! Will do!”

I then later realized that I got it 9 years ago during a very different part of my life. I’m in a #9 personal year. It made sense it carried old energy and all old must go before the new year began!

So it did and quite quickly and magickally I might add. Within two days of posting it, it was gone. I immediately knew who was going to be the new owner of my special car simply by reading the energy in the emails received.

Both sides took a gamble in trust. The new owners flew down from Northern California immediately, loved it, we all connected so well, purchased at full asking price without a blink ($11,111 of course), and even gave me a bottle of wine from the winery the husband worked at, as a gift. (Now I don’t drink, mind you, but how sweet was that?). Then drove their car home and emailed me with sweet gratitude and joy for the car.

Really?! Yep!

I then replaced my old bike, also from a whole other life I don’t recognize, and got a fully outfitted mountain bike for the upcoming adventures, but also to do my errands and grocery shopping with. So I have saddlebags and all the workings, which has been super fun getting the food each week with since I’ve started. Getting ready for my trips again this week. It’s not only fun, great exercise, and a way to enjoy the outdoors, but also supportive for the environment, leaving less of a carbon footprint.20151119_134635_resized20151119_134643_resized_1

I also STILL have a garden….well, a very mini one, but still a garden nonetheless – and quite magickal at that! I felt guided to get some plants I could grow in pots and still enjoy and share some homegrown goodness with my bunnies.20151108_140526_resized20151028_110442_resized_1

So I started with 6 plants, which grew to 8 (both by choice and by magick), where it will remain. I have arugula, kale, parsley, cilantro, golden cherry tomatoes, mint, strawberries, and a hybrid succulent.

I say one came by magick, as my parsley plant suddenly sprouted mint from where it was growing! I had thought about getting mint, but didn’t. I guess I was meant to have it anyway. 🙂20151105_122558_resized20151108_142600_resized

So while I was out getting another pot to transplant it into, I found my succulent. I’ve always loved succulents….the ones that look like flowers…and this was the only one like it at the store. Of course it was labeled as a “Hybrid”. I happen to like that, being a hybrid myself.

And these plants have been the healthiest little plants…so lush and providing tons of harvest already. I got the most strawberries I’ve received from any of my strawberry plants…11 right off the bat. And I now have 10 tomatoes on their way.

When we travel, I have a special box to place them all in, indoors, and when we are grounded somewhere I put them out on the picnic table at the camp site.

I love caring for them and being able to provide some goodies for the bunnies, as well as enjoying salads of yum myself. The arugula is so amazingly good…nutty and spicy. I’m kind of on an arugula kick right now.

Our male cat, Boojum has even enjoyed the plants both outdoors and indoors (as well as escaping a couple of times). Outdoors when we take him on a walk with his halter leash.20151023_164018_resized

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One day, recently, I was out tending to my plants and baking some brownies in the Sun Oven and had such an enchanted little encounter with a white butterfly.

This little white butterfly would not leave me and the plants alone. She kept fluttering all around us and the plants I was working on. When I went inside, she went away. As soon as I returned, she came back. I was out for about an hour and a half and she was always there.20151105_122728

At one point two Monarch butterflies shot down from the sky, dancing together. They twirled down, held in a dance, then shot back up and away.

Not long after that I was pruning and harvesting, as miss white butterfly was fluttering all around my finger tips, helping out and infusing my plants with magick. I used to have a white butterfly that would visit me each time I’d go by the Garden Tower at the house…was she the same one?

She then landed on my left hand and sat there a few moments, letting me raise her to my face to blow her a kiss and thank her. She then flew off. I looked at my cell phone right away and caught the time, which was 11:11!

1’s have been showing up like mad crazy over these last 3 months. I keep seeing 1:11 and 11:11 on the clock, as well as 111, the 11,111 of my car sale, and just lots of 1’s in general. Lately, including alongside that, 4’s and 5’s with 4:44 and 5:55 at marker points.

It’s also been an incredibly rich and wild dream time as of late.

How about for you?

I mean like involved, intricate, symbolic, and prophetic.

I noticed it once we moved permanently into the RV. Could have something to do with the fact that I now sleep next to my crystal skull, Raja Seraphina.20151023_123823_resized_2

Or, could be the channeling and opening taking place. Perhaps all of it. I’ve never slept near my skull, but now she literally is a foot from my head at night. Powerful!

She’s the last large crystal under my care, as of currently. I have a small trunk of special crystals and sacred items with me, but basically that’s it. Everything I was meant to keep fit perfectly.

And speaking of large crystals, my giant and extraordinary, not-simply-a-crystal, blue quartz “Arcturian” just recently moved on as well.

He accompanied me to the RV and lived with us, anchoring and channeling the energies needed up until 11/10. I was guided to send him then to Laura (who, after all, was with me when I first took him home and gave a helpful nudge) to assist with the important work she is doing. Sending him on the 10th ensured he’d be traveling on 11/11 to his destination, which also happened to be within the New Moon energies building then and the timing I was told to do so.

For now that’s where he’s meant to be and may stay indefinitely. If anything shifts, he’ll be in search of a new, mirroring keeper.

And the animal babies have been doing well. It was a bit of an adjustment for one of our cats – the female, Sweet Pea, but overall pretty darn good and now everyone is doing well with the change. They don’t so much like the travel time, but they are even doing better with that now too. It all just takes time.

20150924_160648_resized_1And it’s actually so wonderful, as being in a smaller space, the bunnies are now part of every single thing we do because they are set up in the main living space we’re always in. So they aren’t tucked in my office like they used to be (although Joy could move in and out if so chose to), but can enjoy family connecting all day long, while we are home. They’re loving that, especially Cosmo.20150925_064732_resized

It’s fun to have the 6 of us all together.

And Joy even went through a big shift on October 22nd.

She stopped eating that day and went inward. Not something that’s good for bunnies to do, as they need to be eating 24 hours a day. So I knew she had something to share and that she was integrating.

I picked her up and held her to my heart on my chest, sitting with her for about 45 minutes on the couch connecting. What she told me was that her heart was going through an expansion and opening more in a way that was new to her, but good.

She’d been much more independent and while loving to connect with me, didn’t always need a ton of physical being held. But she now told me she was ready for that, which was evident in her interactions with Cosmo and how close they have become.

Cosmo has helped her to realize she can still be her own bunny, but open her heart to enjoying that close physical love as well, which will only enhance her experience and not take away from it.

So I told her I understood and was so proud of her. She and I had been through similar journeys with these kinds of things and even she had once helped me to open my heart again and deeper, when I thought I wouldn’t after losing Nestor.

And even in general, we both were finally being able to integrate and balance love and mission, personal and harmonious love, and move in and out of both…enjoying the beauty of each.

This is the gift. To know and experience the fullness of the dance of life as an integrated being.

I then shifted focus with her to her physical needs and shared how her fragile bunny body needs certain things that her powerful soul may not, so she needed to eat if she didn’t want me taking her to the vet. 😉

I’m happy to share that miss Joy started eating not too long after that and our talk, which was important for her to let me know she was ready now for more physical connecting like Cosmo, with me.

Sweet, sweet Joy.

And the sweetness of life has been enriched with potency these days.

How I’ve enjoyed this time deepening connection with our little ones, with Dave, with myself, with all that is important to me and in life, and with bigger picture connecting in much more embodied ways.

Also, things aligned so synchronously to take me down to Encinitas one day, basically mirroring the same things I did with my dear friend, Cliff, who moved on a year ago, only a few days after his transition day and before what would have been his birthday. I didn’t plan it, but I’d been feeling him come through a lot around that time and knew I was meant to connect with and honor him. It was a special day, visiting the same spots he and I went to – lunch at Lotus Cafe, strolling the gardens above the ocean at the Self-Realization Fellowship, and walking the beach – this time with another dear friend of mine.20151030_134459_resized20151030_134226_resized

It’s only been since October 26th that official “Tania time” began, meaning where I was able to truly just be with the receiving and nurturing of all that had been put together in order to create the space for all that is to come.

And that is when my personal project time has kicked in along with delicious days of spoiling myself with the simple pleasures of indulgences I so enjoy and without anything else to work on.

All aided right now with our spot on the Back Bay here, which is a bird sanctuary and perfect place for walks, kayaking, and biking, not to mention constant visits from Great Blue Herons, Great Egrets, and Osprey, to name a few.20151104_151551_resized

I’ve been focused on receiving the creations to birth from me and right now it’s been writing a book that I have a hard time tearing away from once I get going. Even with the limited time I had for personal projects, I still managed to get 85% of the first draft completed. Yay!

I have some offshoots of the book that will also come into play to focus on once the story is ready, but it’s been so much fun to write it and just allow what wants through. I’ve been feeling this story for a while and when I was ready I knew it would write itself, as it is.

I have no agenda with it also…just writing it because it’s like the breath of life for me. I can’t NOT write it. And whatever comes to be with it, will be.

I don’t worry about things when writing…I just write. There’s always time to adjust and edit, but when you’re wanting to create something…no matter what it is, it’s really productive and powerful to let go of the reins and allow creativity to run.

You’ll have more fun too, and others will feel more from your creation, I believe, because it came from that pure spark of life force energy just doing its thing.

Anyway, I’ve been writing and prepping other projects, as well as taking an online resonant course that’s been calling to me for a while because of other aspects of myself ready to come forth more prominently.

I’ve also been starting to receive potentials about post-RV time through the projects I’m working on that are showing me my true heart’s calling.

I saw two shooting stars not long after arrival to the RV park we’re staying at…of course prompting a couple wishes from me. 😉

A lot of synchronous alignments keep happening…telepathy is in overdrive…things feel seamless and on track.

Speaking of tracks…I actually had a dream about jumping on to the top of a speeding train that was entering a different reality, just recently. Train symbolism is cool stuff.

It’s all really exciting. At least I feel it is and as I think it always is for each individual when they really merge with themselves at each turn in the path of their lives and follow that integrated path of their heart and mission.

During this time period I’ve been in channeling mode, feeling the impending timing of the things I’m to bring forth. So I’m finding that things are moving through me as an expression of All That Is experienced through my particular appendage of that. If that makes sense.

So rather than “from me” things come “through me”.

Anyway, it’s the place I’ve moved into now and I know that this experience and journey ahead will continue to cultivate that.

I ride this fine line now of moving in and out of bigger picture to my individual experience…observer to the observed. 🙂 it’s a blur that is becoming more seamless.

And all of this gets nurtured by the choice of lifestyle we’ve chosen right now.

Being outdoors even more, new places and people, living in the moment…all bring opportunities for deeper experiencing, putting to practice all that I learn, and walking the walk.

And there’s nothing like having everything you love and need in one small place that moves everywhere with you. I LOVE it! And I’ll share more about RV living and what it brings to my life and teaches, in an upcoming blog dedicated to that.

The first day we full-time lived in the RV began a continual daily excitement I meet each experience with. Every day is fun and living this way really suits me, and suits me right now.

Later, after we’ve explored for a couple of years or so and done what we feel guided to do and what supports what we need and are guided to be doing, we’ll hunker down and nest somewhere again that will suit us at that time – or not. 😉

I keep saying to Dave, as I mention that time period and possibilities that have entered my airwaves, “when we’re living on the ‘homestead.” 😉

He laughs, “Sounds like we’ll be going all “little house on the prairie.”

I giggle.

For now, we will continue to enjoy the great outdoors and all forms of outdoor fun – natural exercise as I like to see it as. I can’t tell you how amazing it is to be in your home RV in the middle of the forest surrounded by beauty on all sides, as you work cozily inside, or take your work outside to the picnic table or lawn chairs under the awning, or perhaps down by the river or creek.

It’s a slower, more simple, and extremely stimulating life…causes you to be ever more present indeed, which I like and am all about!

I also have the least things I’ve had in a long time. Not that I ever had a lot compared to what others might have, but now I know that only what I really love and need is with me, as shared. And I/we are constantly STILL getting rid of things, as we use things or just shift each day and say, “that’s not me anymore” or “that’s not needed anymore.”

I’ve found that downsizing things on the outside of me has shifted in a way that reflects how I’ve been embodying things more and so I feel more expansive even though I have limited things.

Truly that saying of “having everything you need inside of you” is what I’m experiencing.

And I don’t identify with anything as making me feel more expansive or abundant, although it’s perfectly fine to have them too, as it’s about how attached we are to things.

I’m just in place where I can move in and out of that and still feel the same way because I carry that energy rather than anything reflecting it for me.

I’ve also been experiencing more of how the full gamut of feelings are all so wonderful as a human on Earth – like truly!

I mean pain and sadness and all that so-called icky stuff…what a gift!

This has become more of an actual experience rather than an idea or concept. We always say that all emotions are of value and not better or worse, but when you really experience that and get the click that flips this switch into an a-ha reality, it really makes a difference.

That’s how everything is continuing to unfold for me. All the concepts, things I briefly felt or experienced, things I understood…are moving into beingness more and more…That’s the process with everything until it becomes a seamless, natural, quite every-day experience that you don’t even need to talk about or reflect on.

Of course I am here, as perhaps a way to reflect to, or make connections for, others.

This has come to me in different ways over the years, but now more consistently and daily.

I remember just recently being at the beach and truly getting the beauty of pain and choked up with love for the ability to experience it, as I looked out at the ocean and was listening to music and thinking about the human experience and so-called “losses” I and humans go through.

And when that click came, it was like the Grinch that Stole Christmas where his heart expands three times the size in that moment when he gets what the spirit of Christmas truly is.

Expansion keeps happening and it’s limitless to us all.

Everything has become about merging spirit and form. Human and the soul.

There’s a calm stillness and knowing of my nature more and more and where it is guiding me.

I’ve been the most at peace than ever, and it constantly deepens.

This has carried through and has become rooted within me.

No matter what experience I find myself in, things are met with an inner smile at it all.

This included when we were set to embark on our last trip to Sequoia National Park over the Thanksgiving weekend, from which we just returned, and one of our slide-outs on the RV wasn’t working, which potentially would have not only delayed, but perhaps cancelled the whole trip.

A slide-out is part of the RV that goes out several feet on either or both sides to widen the inside living space when you’re grounded somewhere. This RV has three of them. The bedroom slide-out was the one not working when we prepared to leave.

We originally had reservations only from 11/26 – 11/30 at the Sequoia RV Ranch, but we decided two days before that we would leave instead on 11/25 and just drive half way, staying overnight in Bakersfield.

Of course again, no intentional plan, but this change aligned us with traveling on a potent Full Moon of the 25th.

Anyway, we weren’t sure we’d be leaving that day, as the challenge arose. I sent out energy, asked for help, stayed calm, and didn’t stress, as I always know that delays are intentional for reasons we can’t see. Sometimes they are in reflection to odd energies, or our being in an unclear state, but always for a reason meant for embracing. In this case, I felt the delay was meant for something unseen.

Needless to say, we managed to figure out how to manually bring the slide-out in and so we were on our way, not knowing if it would continue being a challenge or have us stuck somewhere.

We got to Bakersfield with no issues and when we set up at the park, what do you know….slide-out was working. This enabled us time to enjoy a late night meal at a local Mexican restaurant, since we’d been delayed leaving, which got us there in the dark. This restaurant had great vegan options and was open until midnight, so our 9 pm arrival was a-ok.

It felt like we were in another reality though, as the host, waiter, and two bus boys were providing unmatched service to any fine dining place. All of them kept engaging us in conversations…really genuine, interested in us, and caring conversations. It was like we walked into another reality…well, it was…ours! But seriously, there was this odd and cool feeling of a rip in time or Twilight Zone while there, in a good way.

The next day we started Gratitude Day with a relaxing jacuzzi dip and then completed our journey to Sequoia RV Ranch, which was so beautiful! Check out the photos of this special place.20151126_161822_resized20151126_162518_resized20151126_162448_resized20151126_162625_resizedrv park20151126_162343_resized

That first night, after our vegan feast, I had more wild dreams. I was woken in the middle of the night, however, by the sound of metal clanking around, as if someone was inside the engine at the back of the RV.

It was so loud, and clear I shot out of bed wondering what was going on out there. I walked out into the front room and checked on the babies. Joy ran over to me. I caressed both her and Cosmo. I didn’t want to go outside in the middle of the freezing night – likely between 1 and 3 am – but looked out the front side window, seeing nothing. Although I couldn’t see past the slide-outs.

I returned to bed with an odd sense, but in the morning got the nudge and realized that we’d perhaps been given a cosmic RV upgrade in the middle of the night, perhaps as a result of my asking for help and just in general for the upcoming journeys.

This back area is also where the motors for the slide-outs are and so it will be interesting to see what unfolded, as we have someone coming to look at them tomorrow to see what’s up. But since that delay on the 25th, the slide-out works perfectly every time. Hmmmm…

Our trip to Sequoia National Park was, for us, our official RV adventure since it was more of our kind of destination spot with an awesome camp site amidst trees along the river.

20151127_071957_resized20151128_055916_resized20151129_105544_resized_1Each day deer passed through along with a couple of black bears we saw twice. One time, the last evening as a send-off and conclusion to my meditation vision, pretty up close and personal.

What’s interesting is, not many days before this I had an interesting dream about black bears – babies and momma I was walking amidst and then them being put into a slumber by something Dave blew magickally.

Finding their symbolism quite resonant, and making out what I felt to be the message from it, I later discovered in Sequoia National Park how it would also be very literal in premonition to seeing and experiencing black bears.

20151129_155414_resizedI may share more on black bear symbolism in an upcoming post, but let’s just say I was thrilled about the wildlife coming around, not to mention a rainbow across the mountain tops that greeted us upon first day of entering the park.

It was extremely magickal in the forest among the ancient, giant Sequoias. I loved The Giant Forest and The Big Trees Trail. Amazing!!20151128_060405_resized20151128_120317_resized20151128_115508_resized20151128_111825_resized

These trees hold so much wisdom and knowledge. The things they’ve seen…the life lessons they share.20151128_115634_resized20151128_121228_resized20151128_125454_resized

We even got to see the largest living tree in the entire world – The General Sherman.20151128_152936_resized20151128_152109_resized

Its status of largest living tree in the world is measured by volume…so although not the tallest or the widest, in terms of both width and height, his volume is the largest on the globe. Wow! And he’s 2200 years old. Woo!

We hiked and snowshoed in the winter wonderland.

So many Faeries around and making themselves known.

20151128_131808_resizedLights dancing everywhere and in two photos some wild white circles appear everywhere…hard to see unless you zoom in, but these two photos I took in a succession of photos and no others had these white circular appearances, with darker centers. They even move in these photos here…look amidst the trees and center sky.20151128_144702_faeries20151128_144705_faeries2

I even seemed to reveal my Faery self in a photo. I giggled so much when I saw this photo of myself captured. I was in the middle of walking from one spot to another by the tree, but appear to be flying, or about to take off in flight. LOL!20151128_122141_resized

On our last day it was fantastic, as most people had all gone home after the holiday leaving us on our own to explore.snoe showing320151129_130005_resizedsnow shoeing

We ventured up a hill and came to rest in a circular area, on a stump surrounded by trees. There I went within, closing my eyes to listen and receive.

I didn’t expect anything, but immediately a vision of a black bear came through, standing on his hind legs, then on all fours. I instantly felt him off in the distance and knew we weren’t alone, and being watched.

The vision then instantly turned into a large wizard of the forest and trees…long white beard and hair radiating out, icy blueish white robe. He appeared with the black bear at the foot of his robe, but like part of him. I realized these two spirits were one and the same. They merged together and then his name flashed in my mind – Gideon.

He came close and stood right before us holding out a crystal all aglow. It was very much like the crystal I had with me – my Herkimer Diamond.20151129_132728_resized

His was emitting light and he held it out in front of us and did something that felt to be an activation.

His message was simple – “Listen.”

He then stepped back, smiled, the sky opened above and light poured through. He then flew off into the light and hole and was gone, leaving me with, “When it appears, go to the light.”20151129_114353_resized

20151128_161909_resized20151128_162148_resized20151128_163615_resized20151128_164109_resizedthe four guardiansWe then returned back to the RV Ranch, sent off with an amazing ever-changing sunset, as we left the winter wonderland through The Four Guardians, and found that the holiday campers were all gone around us.

rv siteWe were all alone in the forested area, making it even more lovely than it already was. There were only about 6 other RVers, but they were far off to both our left and right, leaving us standing alone in the middle.

As soon as we got out of the car a black bear strolled in from the river. He felt connected to the vision and was a very cool send off before we would leave the next day.

We wandered over near him…he was a young one. He was curiously exploring another RV and caught sight of us, walking toward, but then just strolled past. It was starting to get dark, so my phone camera couldn’t capture him, but you get an idea of the proximity in this one image, to us. (look at the dark figure to the right of Dave in the path)bear2

20151129_194459_resizedWe ended out our time in Sequoia National Park, and my sabbatical, with a big dancing fire in the pit, drinking soup from mugs, roasting vegan s’mores, and looking at the stars. I had my google sky map out so we knew where everything was.

And the next morning we headed back to Newport Beach, where we’ll be until January 10th, 2016.

That is the official date we leave this area and begin our grand RV adventure across the states, into Mexico, and Canada, during which time we will not only be integrating what is experienced and learned, but also exploring where we are led to create a home again at some point.

We’re feeling out the first portion of our journey, as we have some things to plan around, but after that will be guided only by our hearts and Nature with her seasonal cycles.

And guess what?

We didn’t plan it, as the only reason we leave that day is because we have something planned here on the 9th we have to stay for, but the day we embark happens to fall on a New Moon AGAIN. We’re definitely in flow it seems and igniting new beginnings energy!

That means I’ll only be here another 39 days. So in terms of local offerings/workshops, those of you that are in the area may want to schedule things before that time is up. I’ll share more about this and offerings in a separate blog post later and in the newsletter.

But wow! How time flies.

I was just thinking last night and this morning again that it’s almost a year here shortly that Cosmo has been living with us, these three months went by in a blink of an eye, the nearly four years in our house is like “where did it go?”, and just in general…how quickly my 43rd birthday arrives soon.

Amazing.

Life is so fragile and precious. That’s been hitting me even more deeply these last few months.

And what I’ve been sensing and seeing is a real contrast between realities.

Within that contrast, so many different experiences of what is each person’s reality.

There are people manifesting their dreams and living magickally and those whose lives are crumbling.

All of it I feel is linked, one and the same.

The crumbling experience is merely a perspective.

In some cases that falling apart is due to not walking the talk.

In some cases it is the very thing that’s been asked for, but isn’t recognized as what you wanted all along since it demands certain uncomfortable changes, yet in fact you are getting what is needed to assist you to get there.

So, you can either try to keep doing things the way you’ve always done, or you can take the leap and embrace the crumbling, the temporary discomfort, and begin building anew.

If you’re frustrated and think your life is falling apart, perhaps the more productive perspective might be that it’s falling into place – with or without you consciously aboard.

How empowered you will feel if you do take the driver’s seat, though.

My life has come undone over and over.

I’ve broken down, collapsed, been deeply stuck in the mud, swirled in darkness, and cried myself dry to the bone.

Yet, each time I’ve surrendered and from the dark depths, found renewal…much like Nature after a forest fire or natural “disaster”.

I’ve reinvented myself endlessly.

I’ve committed to consciously creating my life and consciously experiencing things from many perspectives, as well as exploring the limitless possibilities.

I never place blame and I don’t choose to be a victim.

I choose to remember who I am and the power innately within me…within all of us.

I choose to see that in everyone, rather than the temporary story being told.

I’m not following the path that many would choose, but I’m following the path I’ve chosen.

That’s all that matters. For me. For any of us.

I’m really experiencing the depth of living in the moment, shifting the past, and shaping the future all from now.

This way of life, for me, makes each moment about choices….choices that are aligned with conscious awareness and what flows with the heart.

Life in general is that way…living in the RV really makes it unmistakable.

I love it.

It’s not for everyone, but it’s definitely for me.

The smallest of things speak so loudly now.

I’m listening, Gideon. 🙂20151128_112655_resized

About Tania Marie's Blog

Tania Marie is an international Reiki Master Teacher, Intuitive Energy Guide, Sound Channeler, Visionary Artist, and Author. With over 25 years’ experience in healing arts and metaphysical studies, Tania inspires people globally to embody their essence, access creative empowerment, expand into more conscious awareness, and to harness their magick and imagination to create alchemy for living in harmony.

Posted on December 2, 2015, in Uncategorized and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 27 Comments.

  1. I feel connected to those trees….magnificent…. thank you for sharing your heart ….your rabbits are very close to each other…remember in the beginning when they weren’t ….? Hugging you, the beautiful nature of Tania

    • me too sherry! they are beyond words incredible…you’re welcome. and thank you for taking time to read, as well as for sharing it with me. yes, i do remember! they were quite challenged at first with boundaries, mostly due to joy needing time to integrate things. now they are inseparable and a loving bunny family. i love it! warm snuggly bunny hugs to you sweet friend ❤

  2. To say I was thrilled beyond measure when a blog post message from you popped up in my email, would be a bit of an understatement!!!! What a wonderful update and magickal three months you’ve had! I’m so glad you’ve re-emerged to connect and share with us. I’ve missed the light of your perspective. Much love…

    • awww!! you are always so sweet with your energy and words…like feathery soft caresses. thank you treesa!! thank you much for sharing in the excitement of it all. it’s been pretty amazing and looking forward to what’s unfolding next. did you see my video i posted a couple of days ago? lots of love!

  3. Sweet Tania! Thank YOU so much for this great ”partage” J’ai adoré lire tes expériences pendant ces 3 mois..et en même temps, cela me donne des références et je me disais: ah moi j’étais en train de vendre ma maison..etc etc!
    Alors BRAVO et tu m’inspires car je veux, dois et vais faire une telle escapade car j’en ai besoin et moi aussi, je reçois des vibrations pour le faire! Moi aussi j’ai besoin d’une retraite..d’au moins 1 à 5 mois!
    Encore une fois BRAVO! Je suis très fier pour toi et J’ai aussi beaucoup d’admiration pour toi!
    Love Hugs and Smile! XooX

    • thank you dear eroic 😉 lol! i mean eric…i very much appreciate you sharing your reflections and supportive words, which i’ve translated here to make sure my french isn’t rusty!! LOL!

      “Sweet Tania ! Thank YOU so much for this great ‘ ‘ sharing ” I loved reading your experiences during these 3 mois..et the same time, it gives me references and I thought, ah I was trying to sell my maison..etc etc!
      So BRAVO and you inspire me because I want to , and will have to make such a trip because I need it and I also receive vibrations to do it! I also need a retraite..d’au least 1-5 months!
      Again BRAVO ! I am very proud for you and I also greatly admire you!
      Love Hugs and Smile ! xoox”

      i’m happy things are going so well now for you after all of the challenges you’ve gone through and overcome. many new experiences on the way and i do hope you will finally get that retreat you’ve been telling me about!! congratulations and much love and hugs always xoox!

      • Thank YOU Sweet Tania! You are adorable!! 🙂 And your frecnh is very good! Happy that i make you practice!!
        Yes..i am very happy too..for your experiences and this amazing trip! It does inspire me a lot!!
        Yes it was not easy Tania…but i made it! YEAH!! (with dignity and honesty!!) I know it was a hard road…you did see it wayyyy back then..(2 years ago..time flyes!!) i guess i had to go through that…but i feel even more alive…more willing to new FUN experiences..and travel! And YES, i will have to and will do my retreat!!
        Very very happy to gain back my FREEDOM…
        ”The journey is what brings us happiness..not the destination”
        Thank YOU for being there…back then…now..and in the future!
        JOY LOVE HUgs and smile…4EVER!
        Merci!

      • i’m glad to hear how reinvigorate you sound. i look forward to seeing how all the new energy manifests in your life an to hear about your retreat! finally!! love and hugs xoox you’re welcome!

  4. Reblogged this on Laura Bruno's Blog and commented:
    Tania and I keep in touch daily or almost daily, and we’ve often chuckled at how the rapid changes in both our lives manifested so fast after our magickal visit together this past May and how our paths converge yet also balance each other. She downsized just as I added the house next door; she felt ready to release the blue Arcturian just as I started having “random” thoughts about this stately crystal; she hit the road, just as I committed to staying put; she returned from her sabbatical just as I announced my break — and yet she’s not fully returned, nor have I fully departed. We’re both in a liminal phase, but coming from opposite ends.

    In any case, I’ve witnessed this magickal unfolding in real time and through my own yin yang lens, but it’s always fun to read the full journey processed over time. If nothing else, click through for the photos alone! Just beautiful. Love and a hearty welcome back to my faery twin! I met Tania during her previous 9 year, and my goodness, what a wild and lovely cycle it’s been!

  5. Thank you for sharing your heart, wisdom and spirit-journey with us, Tania. So much love!

  6. oh my gosh! how i would love to hug you. the puppies are all wound-up at the thought of seeing you too. woohoo!

  7. Tania, Pisces Faery sis, you’re baaaaack! I kept reading this epic post visually, as a film, surprise, lol, so much change and movement, wow! I also have been noticing the 1’s and 5’s ALOT lately. After digesting all the wonderful wisdom, one thing that really struck me was the connection between the photo of your ‘fae’ self seemingly lifting off and how you’re about to ‘take off’ on your grand adventure with Dave and co, it’s hard to put into words, just a feeling of you spreading magick pixie dust where ever you travel, with all kinds of magical beings traveling with you, like a Faery road show! So much love to you and Dave and co, blessed be 🙂

    • hi mitch!! pisces bro!! yessss, back in action. hehe…thank you so much for the lovely thanksgiving blessings…so appreciate it! i love how you see things…yeah, there’s been a lot of shifting indeed. you too i’m sure?! have you still been thinking of the potentials with rv life too? or new ideas swarming? very interesting and synchronous with the numbers. cool!

      haha!! that photo really strikes me the most too, which is funny you pick up on that. i hadn’t thought of it the same way you just shared, but that works for me! a faery road show!! yeppers!! can’t wait to have our paths cross along the way, which i’m sure it will in person soon. so much love, warm faery hugs and kisses, gratitude, and magick pixie dust to you sweet, sweet one! ❤

  8. Walking My Path: Mindful Wanderings in Nature

    Beautiful magical time and all the pictures are beautiful! Faeries abound! Nice to have you back on WP.
    Love and Light,
    Mary

  9. Hi Tania! What an epic read, in the best possible sense! I admire your ability to tap into various energetic currents or tides, and go for the ride with the serenity that you and everything else are going where you/they need to go. A lot has shifted for me since I attempted your 30 day nature challenge over a year ago, but I do believe I am much, *much* closer than ever to living that magickal life I keep hearing about. 🙂 I have many people to thank for pointing the way, you & Laura among them. 🙂

    • thank you so much!! i really appreciate your saying that. how wonderful that things have been rocking and rolling for you too and that nature helped ignite some of that for you. 🙂 congratulations!! you sound really good! i hope you recognize the leaps you’ve taken and honor yourself with gratitude. really happy for you!! lots of love and continued magickal flow to you!!

      • Thanks, that’s very kind of you to say in return. 🙂 Without revealing too much to the “public,” I hope you will one day choose to write more about the bear and its symbolism. I have a piece of ocean jasper that chose me to be its holder this past spring, and only very recently did it show me a bear’s face and forepaws hidden there. I view it as a signpost for my journey, but know I have a lot of learning to do, so anything you have to say would be welcomed. 😀 Take care!

      • you’re welcome!! 🙂 yes, i will write some more on bear symbolism since it was so prominent for me since my dream and then the experiences in sequoia national park. how amazing about your ocean jasper (such a wonderful stone!) sounds like the bear is one of the crystal spirits for you that is alive in essence within her/his energy..indeed supporting your journey at this time! xoox

  10. “…sounds like the bear is one of the crystal spirits for you that is alive in essence within her/his energy..indeed supporting your journey at this time!”

    Pretty astute of you to sense that from just a few lines of text! 🙂 You’re spot-on. I hadn’t quite thought of this particular OJ piece (out of the dozens I have collected) as embodying both the crystal and the bear spirits, but it’s an interesting intersection of the two that seem to have taken an interest in me. I can only hope to always be worthy of their regard! 🙂

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