Monthly Archives: May 2016
As we integrate and shift, so too does our environment and the expressions of energy in our lives. This happens more literally these days for me, since we started living as nomads following the callings of our hearts. We continually experience dramatic changes in our surroundings, weather, and what moves in and out energetically. I love the rapid, tangible, and visible reflections that mirror how energy continuously flows.
We journeyed about 3 hours yesterday from Mesa Verde to our new home in Ouray, which took us on a beautiful transitioning drive through a snow storm and reaching 11,000 elevation at our highest ascension, coming to rest around 7800 currently.
Our new home is stunning, sitting in a valley between mountains, at the edge of a rolling river just steps from our RV, forest green all around, two waterfalls flowing from the steep rock cliffs behind us, and beautiful snow capped mountain tops to our left, which have received more white powder since our arrival.
The air is refreshing and the energy is abundant and inspiring. I love watching and listening to the sound of the water flowing through and am whisked to heights of imagination and expansion by the towering peaks around.
We arrived between seasons, which makes it serene and our time with Nature in solitude. The RV park has only just opened and even the bustling Telluride seemed like a ghost town upon our visit in the afternoon.
There are numerous ghost towns in all of these areas – Ouray, Silverton, and Telluride – nestled in between the mountains, which were old mining towns in their days, so they are rich with their own history.
After settling in and having lunch we decided to explore the popular ski resort of Telluride, which is lined with colorful Victorian homes and storefronts to include over 60 restaurants, coffee shops, and bars. The Mountain Village resort area is known for its European alpine elegance.
I loved the individual uniqueness and old-world style of architecture, including the rainbow of different colors to each house.
And the drive over was incredibly picturesque as well, with green-carpeted pastures and majestic mountains all around, rolling streams, falls, and trees in abundance.
We had done some cleaning out and happened to have our box of things to donate in the back of the car. And along the way in Ridgway we happened upon Second Chance Humane Society Thrift Store, where we dropped our donations and picked up a few items – shorts and a book for Dave, a hiking dress for me, and two DVDS all for $18. So not only did we find some cool bargains, but did so while supporting the local no-kill animal shelter.
And animals were abundant indeed, as we saw tons of cattle and horses in the pastures along the way, as well as were blessed to see some bighorn sheep and four large herds of elk – nearly 200 in total.
At one point I counted a herd over over 60 that were all laying in the same pasture with the cattle. So beautiful!
We drove through Telluride’s streets, picked up some local magazines and walked a nature trail.
It skirts around Beaver Pond where you can see a beaver lodge and geese, and then stopped in at Clark’s Grocery Store on the way out, which had a great selection of organic and vegan yums.
Our time here will be different than the ancient integration of some of our last homes, but it feels refreshing, nourishing, and inspiring to the soul to be in our element here, as we love the altitude, mountains, water, trees, and abundance of wildlife.
I have felt on hold with some of my creative projects for a while, likely due to the energy needed to be integrated at the last places and so much deep and ancient soul retrieval going on.
This feels to be more reflective of flow, softness, rest, and renewal….which sparks my creative juices to get jumping back into things with all that I’ve opened to and embraced.
Ouray and the area is laced with hot springs, which we will definitely “soak in” while here.
Today we went on a most stunning hike….my favorite yet…but I’ll save a full post for that tomorrow, which will likely just be all photos so you can fill in the experience and energy yourself…but wow!
The surroundings were everything I love and magickal through and through – so much so that it brought me to tears.
Incredible waterfalls and rock carved canyons where the water flowed, majestic snow capped peaks, rocky cliffs, lush forests, blossoms, areas that looked like the tundra in Alaska, enchanting fields….
Five bighorn sheep got our attention by knocking rocks down the cliff too. We thought it was an avalanche, but there they stood and just watched us. And after connecting with them we walked through a tunnel in the mountain at the other end of a bridge that crossed the canyon and water below us, a rare sighting of a black fox with white tipped tail happened.
It ran across our path and stopped by a tree just watching us and connecting…I learned that these are so rare and said to be a genetic flaw that dates back hundreds of years. The fox is really a red fox that stays black and never turns red.
I’d never seen a fox in the wild, let alone a black one that was so curious and oh so magickal!!! There was even a little magickal light near its tail that appears in a photo.
Anyway, I could go on and on about today, but I’ll end there with these little snippets and will let the photos do the rest of the talking tomorrow.
Needless to say we are loving it here and are definitely in our element.
But back to yesterday….
The last thing we saw on our way home last evening was this door in the side of the rock mountain.
Dave immediately said it reminded him of “the door to the Lonely Mountain” in The Hobbit, which was a gateway to the Dwarf kingdom.
And so it is that a new portal invites me yet again.
I felt I was entering it today on our incredulous journey along roughly 6 miles of Ouray Perimeter Trail.
New magick is afoot!
I’ve been sharing my gift of sound channeling in a more public way since we’ve been journeying in the Magick Bus and experiencing the ancient energies of the land.
However, this is not a new expression for me, as I’ve been doing it all my life AND LIVES, as well as on sacred journeys and retreats and even focused an intro class on the subject on one of them.
Recently, I knew it was time to reveal it, as it is the essence of who I am and the way to step into embodying that more.
So with vulnerability I have been sharing my voice through several videos and at the start of the year had furthered my studies with intuitive sound, which just reiterated, intensified, and empowered this expression and foundations even more.
If you’d like to learn a little bit more about “sound” here is a blog post I wrote a year ago on the subject:
And if you’ve like to explore the recent videos, to just get a taste of this, here are a few videos you can listen to (each has a paragraph description of how they came about at their links under the video):
So this all leads me to the new offering I spoke about in my May Newsletter this month.
Down the road I may teach more in depth on this subject, but for now the most resonant thing for me feels to be able to offer this gift to others and is currently the only service I am offering (other than the spontaneous creative inspirations like the Magick Stones that pop up as guided) since it feels most aligned at this time.
I am offering personalized sound channelings for individuals.
These will include a video share with your sound healing message, which can be for a specific focus/intent in your life, or simply as a current signature resonance to support you into more fully embodying your essence and moving through challenges to get you to the next step along your journey.
It could also be for specific help with things like opening, clearing, and balancing a particular chakra, channeling the essence of elements in Nature or Cosmic frequencies, deep cellular shifts with traumas, supporting a new path you are trying to manifest, opening you to more creative inspiration, clarity, or courageous commitment and strength, receiving nurturing and love needed from the reflection of your inner child, working through releasing, tapping into your ancient soul, etc.
You simply bring to me your desires and we’ll tap into the essence reflection of that via sound.
I tune in to the essence of your energy and allow sound to move through me that is at the frequency needed to help support the shifts.
This will shift, as you shift, and no two sound channelings will be alike, although may have similarities due to frequency resonance…as sound is ever-evolving from creative impetus and power of the now reflective moment.
At times this can be musical, other times more like toning, or a combination. Sometimes it may sound like another language or chants. And it isn’t always what you think of as “beautiful”, although always comes from a benevolent and pure expression of All That Is moving through me to you…to help awaken and activate the latent pieces of your soul and DNA.
What you receive from me is a personal sound video, which you will be able to listen to over and over, as needed. This could be one song…or may need a layering of more than one. I will ascertain that when tuning in. I may have crystals or other shamanic accompaniments, which will be explained in either the video or an email you’ll receive from me with your video that may feel to be part of creating the field of energy to support the channeling. And as always, Reiki energy and a lot of love will be woven and infused into the sound offering.
In the future, I may make available MP3’s and/or CD/DVD’s of sound channeling for specific energy frequencies and meditational or facilitation purposes.
To receive your own personalized sound channeling and signature songs to help you to integrate healing on deeper levels, strengthen your self-empowerment, support movement of energy to the next step or leap, and open portals of experience that activate and balance your chakras into more alignment with your essence as an expression of All That Is, you may partner in this offering here:
Once I have received your sound channeling request, I will email you to discuss the intent for your personal sound channeling. So please make sure to include the email address you’d like to be contacted by, in your order or in the comment section of the invoice.
You may also gift these to a loved one, in which case, please provide me any needed information on that request in the comment section of the invoice as well.
I have also created a separate page link on my blog that you can visit with this same information, at any future time you may desire support with something else, as listed above and not limited to what you see here.
Here is the link to that page:
“The sound that came from you, while you were in the sarcophagus of the King’s Chamber, is something I will never forget. I’m getting vibed right now. What came out of you was magical, mystical, angelic……. Words fail to pain the experience. I’m truly honored for the experience.” ~Michael, Arizona
“When you were Singing, it was one of the most Wonderous and Powerful things I witnessed the whole trip on our sacred journey in Peru–WOW! The energy you were bringing through was so Pure and Beautiful. You were definitely the pinnacle of the Triangle that day! I am Honored to have been able to support you in that moment. I am still filled with Gratitude and Awe for everything that happened!” ~Christopher, Montana
We spent our last, blessing filled day here in Mesa Verde National Park, yesterday, exploring 6 miles of walking trails on Wetherill Mesa that lead to various ancient ruins and as we wandered we were greeted by wild horses, ravens, giant fuzzy caterpillars, red-tailed hawk, mule deer, and even a mountain lion. Walking through both forest fire and Juniper and blossom filled areas we got to experience Badger House Community, Two Raven House, Kodak House Overlook, Long House Overlook, Nordenskiold Site #16, and more.
The weather shifted back and forth between cold rain and wind and hot sun and clear skies, having us layered up and then looking like pack mules with our layers wrapped around us along with our packs and water.
At times walking through the burned forest with no one in sight, not a sound, and ancient ruins around us, I felt like we were the last people on Earth.
The ruins were some of the most intact we’ve seen and the animal guides were plentiful.
We came upon two groups of three wild horses each – one was a family with a foal. And at one point a stallion ran right across our path trying to keep away another younger, less robust male from his mare.
And while we were viewing Kodak House that’s when mountain lion appeared across the canyon.
I’ve been holding the intent of seeing one – I put it out there I wanted it at a safe distance, so a canyon between us I guess was that. 🙂 I watched her slink down the cliff rocks, her long thick tail swaying in balance behind her, into a tree shaded area, which may have housed her den or perhaps she became aware of us and ducked out of sight, as it is so rare to catch a glimpse of them. Even Dave had trouble seeing her when I tried to point her out, only catching her at the very end before she hid.
That was truly a gift, powerful medicine, and so cool to see her near the cliff dwelling. I reworded my intent that the next sighting of a mountain lion is a little closer, half that distance, but still safe, so that Dave can see better too. 🙂
We also heard the haunting calls of ravens, as we watched one fly into the cliff dwelling and behind the structures where it must have had a nest of little ones, making this ancient site their home..their cries echoed through the canyon.
So far all of my intents with animals have come to be. We have been so blessed by their presence.
The day ended with Red Tail Hawk close by on a Juniper tree and then taking off, displaying his red tail and following alongside us while Mule Deer appeared making their way down a hill…the last one wagging its tail and reminding me of Cosmo and the way he does the same.
We spent some moments at the last cliff dwelling sight taking in the view and saying our goodbyes, as we likely won’t see ruins again, or at least ones like this for some time now.
On our way out from leaving the last cliff dwelling I saw this burned figure of a tree that reminded me of an island statue or totem, looking like it’s blowing a kiss goodbye.
And so we say goodbye to this ancient area that holds rich energy and connection with our Earth Mother.
These people lived in harmony with her and the Cosmos and it seemed a perfect way surrounded by so much diverse beauty, powerful energy, and animal spirits to celebrate these ancient ones and their relationship to Nature on this day – Mother’s Day – as it reflects for us a way of embodying the same.
This is a time for honoring and integrating within, the Divine Mother Energy and recognizing and honoring it in all others, the Earth herself, and as the Universal source of creation and love that it is. And when we merge this Divine Feminine energy in integrative partnership with the Divine Male, we create the impetus for a New Earth experience.
“We’re sitting on our blessed Mother Earth from which we get our strength and determination, love and humility – all the beautiful attributes that we’ve been given. So turn to one another; love one another; respect one another; respect Mother Earth; respect the waters – because that’s life itself!” ~Phil Lane, Sr.
Haunting peace was carried on the wind.
It danced around and within me and floated across the ancient city.
A lone and unknown bird call echoed through the Juniper forest, as watchful eyes pierced my soul from every direction.
I wrapped my knit hood close, keeping the rain-chilled air that dropped 20 degrees within minutes from stinging my neck and ears.
Walking the path that followed the outside wall, which enclosed this vast village, I scanned the now rubble where once stood one of the largest Anasazi settlements within the region.
A village over 800 years old of 420 rooms, 100 kivas, and 14 towers surrounded me and time was bridged between then – the 1200’s – and now, as we became One.
At the Great Kiva I sat to connect, honor, and receive.
Wolf appeared within the fire-lit darkness, becoming the powerful man before me.
Brown skinned, black haired, bright eyed and clad in fur and talismans, Wolf hooded the head of this impressive figure of powerful, primal medicine.
I was privy to this sacred ceremony where the veils of time once again came down and his dance was for me.
A long dark furred cape was offered to me and wrapped around my soul.
I was cloaked in darkness that revealed the true light within.
Visions of pottery pieces flashed in my mind that I was told I would find.
I emerged with direction that led to painted green, white, and fingerprint-etched finds of my clan.
Pieces of my soul once again retrieved within the impressive four-acre ancient city of the 164,000 acres within Canyons of the Ancients.
Deeper embodiment of my thread is enriched with each woven filament that binds me within the collective tapestry.
Sands of time had merged at the neck of the hourglass where the point of power IS.
When you come to know your own personal processes you can be your own best friend and guide in how to get rebalanced if thrown off temporarily because you’ll know what naturally is you and what isn’t and what your patterns and triggers are.
It’s a patient and present process of consistent awareness in identifying, listening, and taking things in steps to lead yourself gently and lovingly back to center.
It’s also about seeing things as welcomed gifts rather than surprise attacks, to show you how far you’ve come with things and how quickly and naturally it happens because of the consistent repatterning back to natural flow you’ve committed to.
It doesn’t mean that you won’t ever have new things come up, but you WILL just KNOW that you can handle anything and you’ll naturally just do the alchemy of shifting things without even consciously knowing that you are.
That’s the beauty of it and what I love to experience more and more of.
You just become more of who you are and that is the continuous awareness – rather than a cause and effect, it becomes a natural dance and flow that simply moves through you instinctively.
Renewal is constant even if you don’t yet see it…..believe.
“Don’t despair too much if you see beautiful things destroyed, if you see them perish. Because the best things are always growing in secret.” ~Ben Okri
There was something powerfully activated yesterday from our intuitive and rewarding exploration of another incredible area – Canyons of the Ancients National Monument – so much so that the top of my crown chakra felt like it was splitting open. This area is like an “outdoor museum”, but also like a treasure hunt, as most of the archaeological sites are not apparent to the untrained eye and precise locations aren’t publicized.
Canyons of the Ancients contains more than 6000 Anasazi – Ancestral Puebloan and other Native American cultures – archaeological sites and in some place, up to 100 per square mile.
They recommend stopping first at the Anasazi Heritage Center before beginning your exploration, to get maps, guidebooks, orientation, etc., as although the Monument is open to explore on foot, there are few and limited marked foot trails and no indication of where things are or what to look for.
When you arrive there is just a small sign that says Canyons of the Ancients and has a general trail map of the area to choose from.
As I said, we decided to just explore without info and let ourselves be guided. We had a window of about 2 hours, so we also wanted to maximize that.
It proved very rewarding, as the trail routes we took, our spidey senses, and knowing what to look for, since we’ve been exploring so many ruins already, led us to find quite a few sites.
It’s a really remarkable area and less traveled, as we found only about 4 cars parked at the main trailhead, but only came across a guide and one person with him on mules and two mountain bikers, briefly at onset and end.
The rest of the time we were completely on our own in this vast sacred area walking in the ancient footsteps of these people and exploring their dwellings and temples.
I decided to stay more grounded and let Dave do the climbing and upper explorations, while I scanned the cliffs for more sites and directed him to things I could see to go check out from his higher ground.
We found cliff dwellings, what appeared to be walls of surface dwellings on the tops of the rocks, and temple sites.
We also found the perimeter walls of lower dwellings on the ground below the cliff dwellings.
This seemed to be quite the location for so many communities, one after another.
While Dave would climb up, I’d explore below and many lizards came to greet me.
We also had a raven flying into the large cliff dwelling we found, as we were leaving it, and when we came to this most intact dwelling, hummingbird appeared.
I heard a very loud buzzing and felt chills of energy around me, realizing then there was a hummingbird buzzing above my head and circling me.
Then it flew off in the direction of the cliff dwelling.
Right after exploring, we stopped on a nearby rock under the shade of a tree with view of that site, to drink some water and have a snack and two hummingbirds found us. They came buzzing again around us and landing in the tree’s branches above us. They were very intent on finding us and making sure we knew they were there.
The ancient ones were definitely welcoming us. It reminded me of when we were in Peru and arriving at the Sun Temple when a hummingbird appeared to welcome us.
Can you find me in this panoramic shot on the right looking out at the cliff dwelling ruins lining the inside and tops of the cliffs at center?
We really enjoyed our intuitive expedition, not knowing what to expect or what we’d find, but it was perfect. And being that we but scratched the surface of all that is there, we feel we will likely return in the days remaining.
The next time we’ll stop at the Anasazi Heritage Center first since we’ll have more time and it is Southwest Colorado’s premier archaeological museum of the Anasazi and has a ton of things to see and learn about, as well as will provide information on more things we may want to explore at Canyons of the Ancients.
If you have the time and can do both exploration on your own and go to the Center, I’d recommend doing so, as it will give your intuition, presence, and observational skills a good exercise before getting info. My guess is you’ll still be using some tracking and other skills even with info, as nothing is marked except the main trail heads.
As I mentioned at the start, something took place, as when we arrived back home the very top center of my crown chakra started aching.
I don’t get migraines and rarely ever get head aches…usually it’s an energy thing if I feel something.
But OMGoodness did my head hurt and would worsen no matter what I did. I even laid down for a bit and it just increased. I drank water to make sure I was hydrated and it increased. It was literally like my head was being knocked open with a sledge hammer right at center.
I tried Reiki and it increased.
Dave was sitting outside reading and I went to sit with him and told him that I felt like something was happening from the energies. My crown was expanding, shifting, and/or opening.
I told him that I was feeling a shift literally inside tear me open and it was making me very emotional and wanting to cry – and did – and it was not due to the pain, but an activation.
He asked if I wanted him to do Reiki on my crown and I said yes, so he did, as I closed my eyes and tears ran down my face and my legs started shaking, which happens – the shaking that is – when I’m going through something like a kundalini experience, but for me this energy is coming down through the crown now and not up – mirroring what the channeler/reader in Sedona has told me the last two times I visited him there that this would be my new experience from now on of things channeling down through me, not up.
And while I sat there in pain, tears of opening, and shaking in my legs, we heard what sounded like owl hoots in the tree in front of us and I caught glimpse of a bird moving on the branches…then two.
They sounded just like an owl, but as they moved more I saw that they were Mourning Doves cooing in a way that sounded incredibly like hoots.
Their presence seemed symbolic bringing the deepest kind of peace, promise, and purification.
Mourning Doves help us to release any deep traumas stored in the cellular memory, which can be assisted by sound channeling through your voice and body. In this way they are also helping to clear and cleanse so that renewal can take place.
Their melancholy coos remind me of Celtic keening and similar to the sound healing and mourning I shared in my video.
They are also connected to the transitional times of the day’s cycle, as in morning and night – we heard them at nearly 8pm – times when veils between physical and spiritual worlds become thinner. And so they are messengers from other worlds and can help to reveal the hidden energies and provide calming peace and hope with the process.
They seemed to be, for me, helping me to peacefully embrace this shift taking place and to “be” with the growing pains and opening, breathing into them rather than allowing the emotional cleansing to cause anxiety in any way, as it felt at first to be cropping up as, along with frustration and more.
After seeing them, Dave giving me Reiki, and brushing my tears from my cheeks I felt a lot better, but it was first by going through a process of it increasingly getting worse – my crown hurt SO much.
I was then able to go back inside and shower, as well as bathe Cosmo and with the physical cleansing things continued to balance out.
I knew another big change was upon me and I’d be implementing some more major decisions that feel necessary at this time in my life – crucial and timely.
I’m sitting with it for now, but will share more when it settles completely in body.
(Also feeling significant to add, today 5/5, would have been Gaia (my Russian Tortoise’s) 13th birthday and it was also the day that Nestor’s ashes came home to me)
The best medicine is love and an ever-devoted best friend.
Joy snuggling Cosmo, while she rests her head above his heart and gives him healing Reiki love and support to help him get better and through his health challenge.
Life wouldn’t be worth living without all of the enriching experiences, both challenging and sweet, that we encounter. And while I am living my current dream, it comes with all of that even though there is more solitude in our lives, as I then have deep personal reflections to process and integrate through all of the energies we encounter, Nature’s mirrors, and things that hit close to home. The latter of which I’m experiencing currently with Cosmo’s health and a physical challenge that has manifested.
For a couple of days I’d started to notice him sneezing a lot and could hear some congestion when he was chewing his food and licking me. I also noticed Joy was caring for him even more than usual and giving him Reiki.
So after the weekend, on Monday, I called around to find a good doctor that knows rabbits and was lucky to find one in Durango, forty minutes away. They had an appointment early the next morning, yesterday, so I took him in right away.
The doctor was so sweet and so knowledgeable. It is always such a relief when I find a vet that specializes in rabbits, as regular vets just don’t understand them and mostly focus on cats and dogs. So unless you find an “exotics” doctor, or one who has a lot of rabbit experience, you really don’t know what you’re getting, as rabbits are very intricate, fragile animals that have special needs and require special care.
So, it was wonderful to feel like Cosmo was in great hands and the doctor truly cared and was so intimately personal and not all about business. He listened and he was a gentle soul, while also providing great knowledge.
After examining Cosmo he came to the conclusion of believing he has pneumonia – something that can just happen due to age, as they are susceptible. His lymph nodes were pea-sized, his breathing a bit labored, and he could hear congestion in the lungs and nasal area, as well as by listening to his breathing with the stethoscope.
It isn’t definitive, as he said there’s the off-chance it could be allergies, which I’d also asked about, but we would treat the pneumonia, as that is critical, and see from there how he responds.
In all other ways he appeared healthy and fine. The doctor wasn’t concerned about things like cancer, Cosmo has a healthy appetite, which he demonstrated as usual in the office chewing away on his hay during the visit, has regular bowel movements and produces the needed cecotropes, etc. His weight was a little down from when I’d gotten him up to about 4.6 lbs, but at 4.4 lbs now the doctor didn’t feel concerned and that’s been about his average mainstay weight.
He said it was good that I caught things at such an early stage, as he usually sees people bringing rabbits in when it’s too late. Something to keep in mind in all cases with any animal, but rabbits especially do not have the leisure of our not being present and intuitive with them, as they are complex and fragile, despite their powerful medicine and individually powerful souls.
For now, he is on a two-time-a-day oral 1/2 tablet for seven days, which the doctor feels will do the trick, if in fact it’s pneumonia, which he’s had great success with and is safe for them, as opposed to other orals and antibiotics.
So for now, it’s a waiting game, along with lots of Reiki energy from both Joy and mom to see him through this.
Luckily his spirits are good, he continues to eat and eliminate well, but is needing rest and is challenged with the symptoms.
These are the times that challenge us as caregivers, moms, and dads.
The times when you love unconditionally, stay in trust without falling into the trap of worry as best you can since it will be picked up energetically by the receiver and not aid the healing process, have faith that everything is unfolding in a bigger picture way that has all souls’ best interests in mind despite what it seems, and continue to give in all the ways you are receiving from that love you share with them.
It’s hard to see our loved ones going through tough things and yet I feel the best I can do is to remain present and conscious of all that is going on so that I can best support the flow of energy.
That includes looking within myself as to what might be going on within me that I can help process along with him, as the causes and root can also be the parent’s experience. So when I root out things for myself and heal them, then Cosmo (our children) also receive the healing.
That’s when I immediately started looking at the reflections for myself of Cosmo’s pneumonia and what might be behind it.
While of course every soul has their own journey and they know when there time is, there are also tie-ins to us that help us to grow through the experiences due to our intimate connection with them. So whether that means we work through things and that heals us both, or we work through things and that heals us and releases them to peacefully move on – their work complete….it is always of benefit to look within.
And since I know I’ve had issues around my own lungs since I was very young, it definitely felt like an energetic theme of connection my dear little Cosmo, who is so connected to me, would mirror for me.
So knowing some of the things associated with lungs, I kept those in mind and also looked in all of my books on hand and found more on pneumonia from which I could weed through and find the things that resonated at heart for me to process.
Here are a bunch of things I found, of which half I could connect dots with for myself and things I had been currently processing:
Tired of life
Emotional wounds not healed
A sign that the process of communication with life including the nonmaterial ones, is disturbed. Caught up in conflict with your ego.
You’ve ended up in a life which is not appropriate for your real, true nature: an unconscious choice. Thus you must liberate yourself. Let yourself not be determined by past roads, or by a partner, etc. Build a new life on a more stable basis than formerly: on your deep, powerful Self. Draw your roots up from the old ground and hurry them elsewhere. Realize your complete existence and its dignity. Become conscious in each cell of your body. Turning away from your own divine source doesn’t let that internal fire heat your body.
And here is an affirmation to help process the above:
I freely take in Divine ideas that are filled with the breath and the intelligence of Life. This is a new moment.
I know that I had just recently worked through more layers of mourning and grief, having posted a video message and sound channeling on it, and also having a lot of friends around me that were seeing their animal companions move on to their eternal forms.
I also know that I’ve worked a lot this life, since onset, with old grief that was not of this life, but deep in my DNA and soul that I have diligently been integrating and releasing through.
I know that I’ve moved in and out of being “tired with life,” especially before our Magick Bus journey and there are times I process that, walking in and out of both vibrant excitement and letting go.
I know just recently I’d faced some challenges with what I felt guided to share in message through my new work, not knowing how to do it justice, and putting it on hold where I didn’t need to be.
I’ve also been embracing the need for just “being” and breathing in life right now without having to do anything else like I’ve also done in a very different service-oriented way than I’m called to now, life time after life time because I can, it’s my time, it’s my reward, and that “tiredness” can be renewed into freshness.
And I know I’ve definitely been building a new, more resonant, grounded, essence expressive life from the depths and power within me.
So, yes, I became even more conscious of every cell in my body that reflects things Cosmo may be experiencing through me and even in his own processes of life and where he’s at on a soul level with things.
Our children – both human and animal – are with us for a reason. Their challenges are not isolated to themselves.
I realize that if the decision to stay alive, for both of us, is our desire….then our lives must keep reflecting change that speaks of the essence of who we are at all times. That is something I’ve known now, which fueled our new lifestyle currently and all the new things I’ve been implementing and letting go of.
The process continues evolving and deepening and there are also new layers to the onion to reflect upon. Dear Cosmo is helping me to be extra diligent with it all and not miss a detail.
We must breathe in the breath of life in all fullness….filling our lungs with the sweet aroma of life – and that includes all depths of its richness that is inherent within every experience fully being experienced for what it is.
We must continue to integrate deeply into our powerful selves.
Yesterday I left early at 7:30 am to take my sweet baby to the vet.
The minute I turned onto the highway a hawk was sitting above my path on the light post.
Hawks have been around me so much these last few years and are always messengers of protection and good signs and insight for me, as well as have been guardians with their powerful medicine. They show up to watch over me and us. One had also been in the same place when I took Joy to the eye doctor when she first went blind.
So, I immediately felt peace and thanked hawk.
Later in the late afternoon/early evening, after a long day, Dave and I went out for a short hike on the Point Lookout Trail (which the photos in the post are from). It ascends 400 feet and out on to this ridge that drops off on both sides, taking you to the very end where you can take in the views.
Felt like a good place to be, to breathe in life and expand those lungs and ability to take in more of the gifts being in body has to offer.
On the way down we came upon a beautiful little rabbit. She touched my heart deeply and also felt like a blessing and reminder during challenged times.
This one had such cosmic eyes that kept glowing more and deepening more, the more I connected with her.
Dave left after a couple of minutes, but I remained talking with her for a while and she had no fear of me being so close with just the branches of a bush between us.
Her eyes just expanded and became more magickal, as we further connected. She felt not of this world, but in it….much as I am and have felt most of my life.
Was Nestor showing up in this little one?
I sent her energy and surrounded her with strength and protection, just as I felt her doing for me.
When I peer into the eyes of another, I see their soul, my own, and All That Is.
I felt she was also reminding me of trust and that inner peace, which will see all things through as they are meant to be.
It was I that left her, as she just stayed there and would have as long as I wanted.
I then literally trotted and skipped down the mountain to catch up with Dave, with my arms out and kept saying “I’m flying….I’m flying…” Dave saw and heard me as I caught up with him quite quickly, and giggled.
After we returned, I settled back in and gave Cosmo his second dose of meds, then sat in our rocking chair and held him to my chest, letting him rest while I gave him Reiki, love, and snuggles.
Just then a group of mule deer appeared in front of our RV and I held Cosmo up so he could see them too.
Their gentle grace and beauty surrounded us with love and I felt that no matter what happens in life, that all things were in Divine order and that I/we are always protected, supported, and loved.
I put my trust into the individual and shared journey and continue holding Cosmo in the light of that unconditionally faithful love.
This was part of May’s newsletter message I shared and today with things I’m processing, I felt to share it via my blog as well.
This month I’m feeling the increased importance of embracing the entire journey – both bitter and sweet, of loving the light AND the dark, of walking the middle path, and more deeply embodying harmonic resonance.
My own journey the previous six weeks through Utah’s National Parks has been one of rich exploration that has taken me to the depths of ancient Mother Earth womb energy, and catapulted me through portals of expansiveness.
I’ve been daring to go further and at times feel pulled back like an arrow in order to shoot forward with focused intent. This has also activated the very cells within my body and the latent DNA strands that we all have awaiting our unlocking.
It hasn’t all been easy, as greater levels of vulnerable courage have been needed to expose myself, to reveal the essence of pure, unabridged energy at the well of my essence, and to be okay with holding the energy of misinterpreted darkness for others to reflect and throw energetic arrows at, while I stood in my truth as the only deflection – a deflection that courageously allows the arrows to penetrate the core so they can be alchemized before returning.
I have humbly walked the path of the Ancients, receiving their guiding wisdom for the new and unknown journey ahead, and have assisted with the release and integration of energies through sound channeling.
I have felt the loud silence within and without that can be deafening and also beautifully penetrating.
I’ve communed with the harsh realization of collective belief systems and conditioning residing in my own DNA and made better friends with them.
I’ve stumbled and I’ve gotten back up.
I’ve spoken the truth of my own fear of not being able to do justice to the message I’m being guided to channel through my own expressive embodiment.
I’ve seen the other side of blind faith, as I’ve walked through doorways, bent time and reality, and made new breakthroughs that were miraculous in nature.
I’ve received the gift and messages of so many animal spirit guide encounters and of Spirit itself within the elements and every living part of Earth I come in contact with.
I’ve channeled new expressions of creative energy – always and only when inspired and guided to do so.
And I’d like to add, which was not in my newsletter, I’ve unearthed grief and known both tiredness and freshness with life – realizing the power in all of it and how every emotion is potential alchemy.
And all of this is a continuous journey that will further unfold as we continue traveling in the Magick Bus and I open to the energies each place reveals and draws forth.
I don’t know what I’m doing or how I’m going to do it anymore, until I do it.
Perhaps many of you can relate with that.
Life is all about the eternally present NOW unfolding and being willing to experience it as such with faith and humbleness of learning all things from a clean slate where nothing applies that you once did or knew.
To add another element that was not in my newsletter, there’s simply nothing more powerful to do in challenging situations than to trust, as no level of anxiety and worry will see us through. Trust in the highest good for all always unfolding, regardless of how that ends up looking. Remember that we are conditioned to judge the human condition, but there is always a bigger picture at play that we can believe in beyond reasoning. Our resilient hearts will understand, when our limiting thoughts step out of the control seat.
I am holding the vision of your wholeness and do all that I do with intent of the highest good of all concerned always at the forefront of my fullest possible expressions of personal embodiment in each moment that I can embrace.