Monthly Archives: September 2019
I’ve shared a lot about messages, signs, symbolism, prophetic and revealing dreams, and even Earth angels in disguise over the years. The one thing that always stands out in receiving these reflections and guidance, is presence. When we are willing to be more present in our lives, we are more open to seeing, hearing, feeling, and receiving the gifts all around us. We often are being shown answers to questions we’ve asked, are receiving guidance about things we’ve been wondering, or are being gifted little treasures and pearls of wisdom when we think we are all alone and without hope.
I find that more and more people are interested about finding meaning in things they experience in one form or another and I often get a lot of messages asking me my take on things showing up for them.
I’ve been seeing how more and more people are experiencing these synchronous and uncanny occurrences and noticing repetitive things showing up – or at least their serendipitous timing.
I also find the other side of the coin with many people being too busy or distracted to notice the gifts all around them and/or have challenge with trusting what the meaning is to something they have noticed.
Retraining yourself to be more present, not only opens up these channels more for you to experience, but overall will enrich your life and the connections you have with others, yourself, and everything around you, including Nature and beyond. It also draws your awareness more to the “now” moment and creates clarity of observation and perception.
There is so much going on all around you, but it isn’t all just happening to you or fitting into a stress category theme. There are a lot of really great things and sweet little treasures that can redirect life away from simply going through the motions and can be a way to discover your own empowerment in creating the life you want to experience.
Life can become more engaging, more enjoyable, and full of wonder when you teach yourself to be present to all the little nuances and vibrationally different occurrences that are taking place. In this way, you are able to spot the messages and signs that are guiding and supporting you.
These don’t necessarily have to be seen as something outside of yourself trying to get your attention, but rather a way you are drawing to yourself or manifesting reflective versions to get your own attention.
They may come through things that reflect recurring themes taking place in your life currently that are trying to get you to take notice and either make changes, adjustments, are aiding inspiration, or simply are reiterating you’re on the right track and being supported. In all, they mirror a flow of alignment and that your intentions toward manifestation are working. They also point to this kind of experience being accessed and naturally experienced even more with greater presence.
Then being open and willing to accept the messages you receive will take you to the next level, as if you have a pattern of denial this can be the very reason the messages or reiterating signs keep showing up.
And sometimes the messages and signs are simply little sweet gifts along the way to let you know you are loved, supported, and being thought of – these could be seen as coming from an outside source loving you, or are manifesting as your own inner self loving you.
So how do you become more present?
Here are some ways to help you live more in the now with greater conscious awareness and appreciation:
- Check in with yourself consistently – how are you feeling? where in the body do you feel tension? are you allowing yourself to be with an emotion? what are you thinking right now?
- Celebrate the little things in life and especially the accomplishment of steps you complete
- Really listen to others
- Really listen to your inner dialogue
- Practice living with intention, patience, and presence – consistency is key to retraining yourself – perhaps you create your own mindfulness practice, start meditating a few minutes a day, join a group that focuses on mindfulness, engage something like yoga, gardening, learning a musical instrument, journaling, painting, breath work, walking a labyrinth, walking in nature, etc.
- Create a clear space around you at all times – organizing your work space, special room, home, etc., removing distractions, minimizing life helps to stay focused
- Savor and appreciate each moment – even the small things like the textures and tastes of the food you eat, feeling the sand on your feet, listening to the sounds in the forest, the feeling of your favorite sweater on your skin, a crackling fire, scents of your favorite things, the color of someone’s eyes, a long hug, etc.
- Be open to flow and spontaneity
- Create a gratitude practice
- Create “you” time and some moments of stillness
- Focus on detaching from outcomes and not worrying as much – knowing things are happening in perfect unfolding
- Bring more forgiveness through for what is already done and now can be done anew
I’ve continued to experience a lot of synchronous messages, signs, and wild dreams lately although don’t always share them as I used to.
Around the Pisces Full Moon a lot was showing up including some of my most treasured bird friend feathers and a wondrous find – a hornet’s nest.
I’ve also seen a lot of dead animals recently to include two raccoons, a deer, porcupine, hawk, lots of little ones like squirrels and even one rabbit, and butterflies and bees. Twice, I’ve found injured butterflies I moved to safer locations so that they could at least be at peace and not run over.
Dreams have been ongoing and so many people I know have been showing up in them. I keep feeling a profound shift anchoring and surprises upcoming.
This has also been mirrored in the vastly different weather and quickly shifting temperatures from one day to the next.
And has included a lot of people and animals transitioning, having health challenges that could lead to that or big life changes, people hitting rock bottom, but also tons of new beings birthing on the scene, amazing break-throughs happening, huge healing and opportunity taking place, things hidden coming to surface, and people stepping into their best lives yet alongside all of that.
My take-away in simple words is life goes on, cycles continue, death and rebirth is natural and part of the circle of life.
My deeper take-away would be too complex to write, but simply stated – there’s a lot of intensity right now, as new frequencies are streaming in and reconfiguring things, all pointing to something different on the horizon and it’s not isolated to just here.
The best way to be with this I feel is to anchor that presence and create your own sense of peace to anchor within. Live with gratitude, be all that you can be now, love more, and savor every moment.
When you are consciously aware of the reflections all around you, you will always be guided divinely.
My sweet and powerful Virgo bunny queen, Astrid turns five years (my all-time favorite number) old today and having her birthday fall in the window of the Pisces Full Moon feels so beautifully aligned and reflective of how she and I are perfect counterparts to one another – as I am a Pisces. Full Moons bring to light both complimentary aspects of the astrological sign in focus, so this includes Virgo that shares similar qualities to Pisces that play out in different ways, completing the other side of the coin. Like the two fish, they may seem to be opposing, but create harmony together.
Happy 5th birthday to my best friend, soul companion, cocreator and wise, courageous guide who inspires and nurtures my heart and spirit.
I’m so grateful to you Astrid for choosing to show up in my life just when I needed you.
You make everything better and being here on Earth possible.
Your cosmic presence is home to my heart.
I love seeing you blossom into your wholeness and sharing your gifts with the world.
It’s my joy to support your path and I am humbled how you feel the same.
I love the journey we are on together.
I love you
With intensities on the collective scene, tipping points continuing to take place, and a Full Moon in Pisces, I felt to reshare some of this information on shadow energies, real emotions, and spiritual masks I have often written about in the past. These are the things running the show from behind the scenes and creating what we are seeing and experiencing “out there,” as a result of not having the support and teaching on how to work with the core things that have been conditionally stuffed inside.
Because raw honesty and feelings have been deemed scary, bad, and perhaps even “unholy,” which is interesting because, in my opinion, it is the ticket to wholeness.
The avoidance takes place constantly, as ignoring or blissing-out takes precedence.
Yet, it’s actually what can take things to the next level of actualization, manifestation, and full conscious and deepened embodiment, which creates a state of harmony where triggers don’t yank you off your anchor.
Commitment to consistently really living the core of what your new beliefs are is what helps things to manifest because you embody it.
But if you haven’t yet uncovered the old conditioned beliefs and feelings that came first, then efforts can seem futile or fall apart because the new beliefs were only reconfigured on the surface and in thought alone.
These can be some of the reasons why we stay stuck in survival mode and struggles because those base chakras are holding a lot of old stuff, or are unable to fully manifest because we ran to the other end to get away, desiring more of the bliss states and spending time and focus in the upper chakras solely.
There is no right or wrong in any of this, yet this may all point to an opportunity in your evolution to another part of your experience to look at and embrace.
Life is experience for experience sake – all of the so-called icky and nice – it’s all perfect. And, what works for one is not the same for others.
But if you, yourself, behind closed doors are not happy and intending for something more, then maybe there is something being overlooked.
And that being said, I get the sense of new structures being built upon old and weak foundations and this can only go so far. It can even take up much more energy to try to maintain than simply coming back down to Earth and into the body and emotions to really move the energy through in its entirety – not just stopping at the mental level. It also is about coming into truth and not hiding from yourself anymore, nor feeling the need to defend yourself or place blame elsewhere.
The deepest truth does not require defense.
There is an energetic, nonverbal portion of experience that sends out its own frequency and it may be very different than the frequency we “think” we are emanating.
What comes hand-in-hand with this theme is not just about speaking truth to others, but in being completely honest with ourselves – and this can be done with humor and gentleness, so as to make the process more supportive rather than punishing. This opens an inner dialogue within that initiates a new journey of exploration for you.
You are loved and always will be for all of who you are. It’s now time to shine even brighter.
I honor the parts you can’t see.
The parts you’ve shared are not fulfilled.
The parts you may not want to see.
Here are some links to old posts that may help in revisiting your natural feelings in a deeper, more holistic way:
This MindBodyGreen article by Aimee Dufresne I’ve shared before titled: Stop Being “Positive” and Start Getting Real (Joy) in Your Life – a favorite passage from this article shares that just being positive is
“like trying to fit into the cutest pair of shoes that you want so badly but the only size available is a half size smaller than your feet. So you push and prod and tell yourself you can do it. You can bend your big toe and walk at an odd angle. Maybe the shoes will stretch if you wear them long enough. That chaffing isn’t so bad, is it?
Yes, it is. The further you push and force yourself into something that doesn’t fit, the more struggle and angst you will feel.”
Shadow energies and feelings are crucial and cannot be bypassed. As much as we try to avoid them, they will inevitably stalk us until we face them.
What ever shows up is exactly what is needed.
Change will happen, one way or another, with us on board or not. The reflections and triggers we experience “out there” will only increase so if we want the changes then we need to do something about it.
Complaining or utilizing energy to point fingers and accusations is a waste of that energy and time.
Let’s fuel it into productive ways to embody and create that which we want and to empower ourselves. Let’s take wise action in place of verbal and physical attack.
It’s time to look at what our fears share with us and what our anger is truly about.
It’s also time to look past the surface. We can’t avoid diving deep anymore.
It’s not a bad thing when shadow hits us over the head or smacks us in the face.
It may feel really icky and uncomfortable, but heck, if we won’t listen any other way, maybe that deep discomfort or fear is the way we will?
Perhaps it beckons us simply because it wants our love, much like the inner child we’ve left behind.
Acknowledgment is powerful.
The tipping point is up to us as a collective, which places individual responsibility at the forefront.
We each affect the whole.
The key being, again, focus on the self and what things are reflecting.
Where are we hiding and playing charades from the truth within?
“Nothing ever goes away until it has taught us what we need to know.” ~Pema Chodron
Wishing everyone peaceful balance and harmony within to help create that balance without.
The Pisces Full Moon approaching tomorrow, the night of Friday the 13th/14th depending on your time zone will continue to bring a lot of emotions, feelings, and illusions/delusions to surface.
I hope this helps shed a little light on ways to navigate the undercurrents so you can realize the synergy of the two fish that swim in opposite directions, rather than feel it as a tug-of-war within.
This week may be a fuller week than recently for blog shares, as I’ve felt guided to put out more inspiration with all that I feel people are going through collectively and with what is showing up with clients I’m working with. Today is just a brief update in between blog musings because people have been asking about the client sessions I offer, and if there were packages and options besides the ones originally posted on my Intuitive Energy Guide page.
I did mention packages to fit client needs are an option, but I felt I would make some of those easily available on the page, so you can explore what fits your needs. Of course, you may contact me to discuss things and what feels to be most supportive for you right now or if you need any clarification on the options.
Alongside the three phone session options, I’ve now included phone session bundles, email sessions and bundles, and phone/email combo bundles. Bundles provide savings, which I include in the info. Please read the details involved with each.
Phone sessions are the most comprehensive, but both phone and email sessions have their advantages. If you have really wanted a session, emails can be a more affordable option to make that a reality sooner. Details about what’s included in each session type can be found on the page below.
The email sessions are being offered at an introductory price for now, in order to support these challenging times.
All info can be found here: Intuitive Energy Guide
September has been very full for me on all fronts and so I limited my ability to take in more clients for the month.
I’m starting to move through things and opening up more time in my schedule now by finishing projects, so I’ll be able to start taking on a few new clients beginning next week of September 16th.
If you were on the waiting list for October, feel free to contact me, or I’ll reach out and see if you would like to begin in the last two weeks of September. Otherwise, you can still have a place for October.
I’m still maintaining a healthy schedule to allow me time for my writing and balance in life, but have a little more flexibility right now while I feel there’s need out there for support to help others with those big transitions in life, challenges that are cropping up on the scene, or getting you over those tipping points into the new.
And last, due to the huge theme of self-love and self-worth that keeps coming to the forefront, this Kunzite pendant literally jumped out at me to offer up as a tool of support.
I love the photo above, as this piece so much reminds me of Foxglove blossoms – the Faery lanterns lighting the way – and, to me, even shares some of their symbolism.
This has been a special piece in my personal collection, but in all honesty, it’s just been sitting in my jewelry box for quite some time after initially being a go-to piece. I prefer that it be out there supporting the energy it was created for.
Just yesterday I was looking for something else and when I lifted the top of the jewelry box, the sun through the window hit this pendant and just like my sweet bunny friend, Hope, has “lit” up my life with messages, this pendant beamed a message of wanting to light up someone else’s life.
I knew it wasn’t about my need to have it still, but that the light beam was like a stream or channel to the collective and I was being told someone may find it supportive, as I did when first it came into my life at a pivotal transitioning period for me.
It’s definitely a stone for deepening into self love and enhances romantic love, but truly works on a different level than Rose Quartz. Each beautifully powerful and supportive, but I find another octave, so to speak, available when working with Kunzite that fine tunes things.
It is just over 2 1/2 inches long, 1 inch at its widest, and 1/4 of an inch to 3/4 of an inch thick, depending on the depth of the stones at any given point. A substantial, but elegant pendant with full, thick and heavy 925 stamped silver. Incredibly, I never noticed that above the 925 stamp it is actually stamped “Starborn”. This isn’t the artist who I got it from, nor the store from which it came through him, so I’m not really sure about this, although of course find it magickal.
It has two Kunzite stones – one that is very pink (almost slightly violet at times depending on the light) and one that is clear like quartz. Both stones are of great clarity with the top one very softly polished and the bottom one being diamond faceted.
When I first discovered Kunzite years ago, I fell in love. It is a very high vibration stone that, like Rose Quartz, emanates unconditional love and activates the Heart Chakra, but it also connects and aligns it to the Third Eye and Throat Chakras to bring through clarity of loving communication, compassionate and enlightened insight, and enhanced creative self-expression.
There’s an innocence and purity about the pink stone that will support more inner peace, self trust, a healthy synergy between heart and mind for loving thought and action, draw in more fortunate experiences, build confidence toward career endeavors and dreams, encourage emotional freedom, healthy relationships with self and others, support removal of blockages and emotional baggage, and help strengthen and clear one’s personal aura, as well as the energy of your space. It’s also supportive for healing heartbreak, releasing resentment, sadness, and anger, while restoring emotional balance.
Humility is a word that comes to mind with Kunzite, as well as depth – depth of peace, depth of insight, depth of compassion.
Clear Kunzite has been known to add to the above qualities, support for soul retrieval and reintegration. While lilac hues add the ability to draw upon timelessness and bridging past and future in the now, while creating doorways during all forms of transitioning.
If this pendant calls to work with you it is available in my Etsy Shop here with more photos:
I shared about the ever-sweet, magickal new bunny friend that now graces my garden and outdoor sanctuary space with her presence.
She returned on Friday and we spent a lot of time again together in the side yard where she enjoyed nibbling on the leaves of a tree within a circle of lush bushes and other trees.
I immediately received her name – Hope – and could feel the message she carries.
Hope is so pure and innocent, and yet as tiny and vulnerable as she is, she has such grounded presence, depth, and desire to connect without fear. I can sense a wisdom beyond her years and a spirit that is far greater than her tiny, fragile body and existence.
Whenever she shows up she is either bathing peacefully in the sun’s full glow with intention, or is surrounded by filtered golden beams, rainbow light, and soft emanating glows.
She lets me hang out with her and come as near as I want, but we experience harmony in both our exchanges and sharing the land here that we both are blessed to live on.
I made a promise to the land and Faery realm here before we got this house, that I would take care of it and create a sanctuary for all of them to safely thrive in. I also promised to continue to do my own contributing of gifts to the collective and that together we would support a new reality’s potential into manifestation.
Everyday little animals happily thrive here and I welcome them to share in the bounty.
The bunnies come through much more deliberately, however. Their sightings are rare and aligned. So, I know there is purpose when I commune with any of them, which so far seems to be one at a time except for last year when both Blueberry and his mom were together.
Hope is a new generation of bunnies and synchronously the day she gave me her name, we also learned that our neighbors across the street brought into this world their new baby boy.
On this same day, also, I placed my mushroom statuary I had inside my office, alongside the flying faery that is taking off from atop a smaller mushroom.
I felt something was missing there to anchor the end of the path and it also beautifully puts all the little beings (rabbits, gnomes, and faeries) into the right size perspective.
I also ordered the little bird bath I wanted, which will go in the garden for the sweet bird friends (we have more now than ever too, including all sized robins, woodpeckers, sweet little chickadees, hummingbirds, steller’s jays, and a variety I don’t know). I will place some rocks in it to create a shallow part for the bees and butterflies too.
Mushrooms are considered good look and foretell of promising fortune at hand, as well as represent the force of nature and rebirth.
The bird bath brings a purifying and cleansing, as well as replenishing energy to the garden. Water is the elixir of life and birds are messengers between realms of earth and sky.
Everything speaking to me of potential and hope for the new.
Hope is the pause, presence, and passion that assists you to align with opportunity in divine timing.
It can be hard amidst challenges that seem never-ending and so heavy to see light at the end of the tunnel.
But often, miracles happen just when you thought there was nothing left to hope for and people tend to stop just short of that tipping point.
Every “setback” can be viewed as the potential for something more to be brought to light, greater alignment in process, or the opportunity to turn something from one thing to another (alchemy) and shift your vibration to match it. Setbacks can be a form of preparation and training to ensure you move forward into the new with a stronger anchor and greater readiness.
Much is shifting in the world on a daily and moment-to-moment basis and if you choose to only focus and dwell on one perspective – seeing only all the drama and catastrophe – not only will you be sucked into a cesspool of quicksand that keeps dragging you down, but you’ll also miss out on the rest (like things to be grateful for), which includes how those things you may not like so much are, and have, actually been fueling all of the positive changes and potentials.
Let’s remind each other of our wholeness, by embodying it more and more and embracing all potentials of experience, not just the challenging, discouraging, and depressing ones.
People often wonder how I can always see the silver lining in things, but it’s because I know from experience that things always turn around, as is the nature of cycles, and that even in my darkest hours, allowing energy to flow through me without judgment and inviting perspective brought release and hope to light.
This isn’t to deny that you may be experiencing something very dark and restrictive feeling, as that is a valid feeling to allow yourself to explore. But it is a way to actively engage yourself into learning how to make a safe space for your heart’s desires to see the light, regardless.
Sometimes that translates into surrendering into peaceful embrace of what is naturally unfolding, realizing the perfection of the bigger picture at hand that is at work for the highest good of all concerned.
And when doing so, we receive beautiful gifts and surprises that birth forth with renewable thriving.
This may not always be the case, as some things simply are showing us the impermanence of life, the continuity of life cycles, the natural evolution, constant change, and the need for loving release and surrender into the flow of unfolding that is presented to us.
There are reasons things unfold as they do.
Sometimes they call for us to take heed more and tend to love and nurturing that we need to be more present to, and which can make the difference in what we want to create, when we do so.
And sometimes we need to understand the message that there are times for us to move on and the culmination of closure has come.
Many times both of those come hand-in-hand.
All of which is not a loss, but simply a gentle embrace of potential adventure into the brilliance of your next choosing.
Something new is always available to us.
It may not be the same…and in fact it shouldn’t be.
It will feel different.
It temporarily may feel uncomfortable.
You might go through a short grieving period, as you let go with gratitude.
It might bring to light your fears and feel scary at first.
It will take an adjustment period while you integrate.
But it WILL present you opportunity in every way.
Opportunity for greater potential.
Opportunity for something more than you thought possible.
Opportunity to be more naturally you because you are in the flow of life, rather than using your energy to go against the current.
Thriving, rather than struggling and surviving, as Astrid demonstrated in her last share.
My sweet bunny friend, Hope, wants us not to lose all faith.
She wants us to kindle hope, because hope kindles change.
Not an attached, desperate, yearning kind of hope that tightens one’s ability to breathe, but a gentle, soft inhale of possibility.
Dark despair and resignation sets up self-fulfilling prophecies. What you believe has power over you.
Hope is a process of remembering your nature, and as nature always renews, so can you.
A huge theme playing out on the collective scene right now is that of struggling versus thriving. There is a huge dichotomy of very distinct and extreme opposites playing out in the world that showcases both people overcoming obstacles and really experiencing beautiful, freeing, and incredible lives and the complete opposite where the worst is at hand. Of course there are always shades of every kind of in between, but more of the contrasts are really at the forefront.
Astrid knows this experience of dichotomy, as she came from a survival-based life to now a thriving life and has been doing the work to open to living her best experience ever by being willing to reprogram her conditioning to a more heart-based rather than instinct-alone based approach.
She came from a background of fear that programmed her to live life as a fight, protecting herself and basically mustering up her assertion to survive. She hadn’t been shown love until she landed at SaveABunny, where eventually I took her home from, and she learned to live the fight, rather than surrender to the love within her. She then utilized this technique as a way to test people, as if someone couldn’t see past her protective barrier, then they weren’t worth her time.
Not only had her survival mode served her in keeping her alive through unhealthy and bad circumstances she found herself in, but it became her signature for now protecting herself until true and unconditional love could penetrate that wall.
In her case, her efforts ended up serving her and did draw me to her, but that isn’t always the case for everyone, as living in this mode makes it very difficult for others to care even when they want to, and it has the possible tendency of becoming permanent even when someone does show up that really does “see” you. It can become a forever mask taking over your nature – much like that episode of The Twilight Zone titled “The Masks” where the family’s hardened hearts become forever their “face” to the world.
So, it’s a risk to take in continuing in this vein.
It wasn’t her nature, or anyone’s nature really, to live this way. And with the right love, kindness, patience, and nurturing, Astrid has been able to flourish. Yet, it isn’t solely because I loved her – no, that is just opportunity’s hand outstretched. It is because she had the courage, commitment, desire, and trust to move through it that allowed her beautiful heart to open once again, where once it was closed.
It’s incredible how much she’s changed since first we met and she came home. She is so joyful, playful, demonstrative of love, and even asks for love now. There is no more fight around showing and sharing love. She has even changed her reactions around food time where she used to fight for her food, sometimes hitting it or her bowl out of my hand. But now she lets me put the food in her bowl and pet her without a grunt or paw punch.
In fact, alongside loving me to snuggle with her and coming to nudge me or nip my pant leg for love, she will give me her front paws in my hands and surrenders to me.
That is HUGE! Nestor used to do this with me, but Astrid always wanted all of her feet planted on the Earth, making her feel safe, solid, and in fight or flight stance mode. And now we hold hands and she trusts her paws in mine.
She has embraced thriving versus surviving and wanted me to share her evolution with others, as she knows how tough this is, but not impossible. Especially so, as we have had direct experience with others experiencing the same thing and how this is reflective of a collective unfolding across the globe.
In the end, it’s each individual’s choice and the best way to help is to live our lives as consistently an example as we can.
We each have different life experiences that condition us, but many have been taught and learned to accept that “life is hard” and that becomes their motto for living.
It becomes so ingrained that you may even get to the point of measuring your success or how well your life is going by how you fight through the challenges and curve balls life throws to you.
Even if you never get past the point of survival, if you struggle and maintain that status quo on the edge, then you feel accomplished. This is what life has become for you, because it’s all you’ve ever known.
You identify with the struggle, being a victim, and that only survival is necessary.
You may become so accustomed to living on the edge with instability and things always just about to fall apart, that it almost handicaps you from accepting anything different – and definitely not an easy life, let alone that people care or that you could ask for help.
It becomes a vicious circle so that when you get through the fire, you can’t even enjoy it or accept it, as a part of you is always waiting for, anticipating, and in essence magnetizing the next struggle.
You believe something’s wrong when life is suddenly okay and believe something must be on the way, which is self-fulfilling and self-sabotage at its finest.
You become accustomed to feeling that life isn’t worth it unless you are struggling and even though consciously you may not want to really think that, the subconscious has much more to tell you and begins to dictate the show. It believes life isn’t worth it unless you struggle. You identify with the fight and it becomes your self worth. Fighting against something is more comfortable than flowing. It is your defense mechanism and life value becomes dictated by struggles to overcome.
It’s almost like this way of life becomes your high and if it’s not hard you look for the next fix.
Whether your parents or family lived this way and instilled this kind of thinking, or you were forced out on the streets at an early age, or struggled silently trying to survive in any kind of abusive, oppressive, scary, or lack-based environment, chances are you might identify with some of this on some level. Many degrees of this kind of belief system, conditioning, and self-dialogue is running the show inside for so many of us.
“Life isn’t easy. Life is a struggle. Everything is hard. I don’t deserve to have it good. I’m not worthy. It’s not worth it if I don’t work hard for it. I haven’t accomplished anything unless it is a fight I struggle to win. I don’t deserve it easy. I don’t deserve love. I don’t deserve to thrive. Suffering is spiritual. Suffering is of service. Giving is more noble than receiving. Abundance is wrong when others have nothing. Others have it worse, so I can’t have more because that’s not fair and is dishonorable,” and the list goes on of inner dialogue connected to this way of being.
It’s not a dialogue we want to have, but have learned to adopt it as the “norm” because we don’t know a different way is possible, were taught to believe anything else is not for people like us, and/or had no one to mirror an example of another option.
Identifying with the struggle and being a victim is self-perpetuating and can be super hard to get out of. Especially when you add in feeling bad about yourself, anger, resentment, inability to forgive, defensiveness, and self-preservation needs at the basic of levels. It can become your form of measuring accomplishment and worthiness for everything.
The rush of walking on fire feeds the burn.
Struggle is comfort food that feeds a collective disorder keeping many in different forms of slavery and survival modes.
It’s hard when that’s all you’ve known from childhood or perhaps even from other lives of destitute.
And from that struggle and suffering, it’s easy to see why so many identify with others who are experiencing the same.
This can lead us to want to help others and work with supporting people and creating services that help those in need because we have been there ourselves and either made it through or still identify in part with that.
I’ve seen it also in the form of projection and if unable to shift it within, then some people will start identifying with certain people or children, a cause, animals, and the environment because we can understand the suffering. If you don’t have a healthy grasp of this dynamic however, it can lead to your creating more suffering for yourself in order to try to save one or all of these. And so the vicious circle continues.
If you don’t have a deep well of nourishment, you will never have enough to help those you identify with that are suffering.
Survival becomes the focus rather than thriving.
A way of validating being a victim, without having had an example for empowerment.
That is until you burn out, hit rock bottom, or maybe worse.
Astrid and I don’t want to see you hit rock bottom, although we both know from personal experience it may be the only way out and through.
A willingness to open to a healthy understanding of this dynamic at work within can help start to make shifts, draw in possibilities, support, or the right people that can make a difference.
It’s not necessarily simple and easy, but it also doesn’t have to be hard. We can start by changing this dialogue we have around everything and catching what and how we say things, as our words carry power. Manifestation can be instant these days in both the ways you may want or don’t want, and the belief system that you speak will magnetize its mirror.
The more each of us are willing to look within with curiosity of why we believe the way we do, why we act out as we do, why our behaviors conclude in the same kind of outcomes, why we have tightening in our hearts….the more we open the gateways to shedding light on change.
Taking small, more easily attainable steps to shift toward a different approach to life is easier than trying to tackle the whole thing all at once. These small steps pave the way for momentum into larger ones and starts to retrain us to a more natural way of well being that leads to thriving instead of surviving.
In the end, we each must choose to want to change, but being willing to is the first step.
If Astrid hadn’t been willing to be open to me and slowly trust, with my consistent efforts, then she may never have experienced living a more peace-filled life.
As a prey animal and rabbit, she is already conditioned to live by instinct and survival, so it’s even more of an amazing challenge that she overcame, compounded by her early life struggles. But it wasn’t her desire to be that way. She found a way to survive, yes, but she also found a way to hope when hope seemed impossible.
She had more to give and wisdom to share, but it may never have come through without willingness meeting opportunity’s hand.
How many times has opportunity knocked at your door in some form and you were too afraid to accept it?
Sometimes it just takes that one offer of your hand, or paw in Astrid’s case, to make a difference.
The sweet and simple little garden I’ve been working on came full circle this last Friday – perfect timing before having weekend guests staying with us at the Forest Portal. It’s been incredibly enriching to manifest from my imagination and was a step-by-step process that reflected the “garden of life.” I actually had the busiest week and weekend I’ve had in a long time, so it’s amazing I did finish it before visitors arrived. It’s also a wonderful gift for me right now, as the weather is in that in-between seasonal state while summer transitions to autumn. This makes it ideal for me to sit on my bench and harness the energy for things in my life.
It’s in the perfect place of the side yard with privacy, right amount of sun enough for the garden plants, but enough shade and filtered light to sit comfortably.
It is also surrounded by trees, including two guardians.
I saw in my mind’s eye how I wanted it to be and little by little, each piece, plant, and detail came together. I couldn’t be more pleased with it.
It’s not super fancy, but it’s a mix of cultivated with a wild, organic feel. I do everything by intuition and create from my heart.
My intention was to create a magickal little realm that would be sanctuary for the little forest animals, an enchanted playground for the Elementals and Faeries, a garden delight for Astrid to enjoy seeing from our shared room glass doors, a sacred space to sit in meditation, read, work on my book, and even do client call sessions from, a beautiful view from my desk when I work, and an intentional portal that harnesses the energy I feel there. Of course in winter it will be covered in snowy enchantment, but will still be magickal.
Some of the flowers are already done for the season, but you can see some of the colorful beauty still blooming.
I love seeing the garden in different lighting, so I added several photos to give you a feel for those shifting energies.
And here are some photos that revealed magickal energy where the flying Faery that sits atop a mushroom is, as well as the tree portal door, crystals, and lounging gnome.
The sitting area had to be leveled and supported with retaining walls, I had to plant and mulch the area where the plants are, we created a paver patio and small paver walkway I lined with stones to the sitting area, and then I added the special little touches like arch with tiny solar flower lights, two small solar lanterns to light the path, and brought out my little statues and details to complete the enchanted world.
This includes two gnomes, two bunnies, two faeries, and a faery portal door, as well as some crystal offerings.
I already had four owl guardians and “grow” mushroom at the tree stump lined, larger path, along with tons of crystals and treasures that line the path to the room I share with Astrid.
Everything inviting to the Otherworld and Natural world, as well as protective.
I promised to share photos of it completed so I hope you enjoy these.
Today is our first rain, which we usually get in August, so everything is getting a beautiful refresh with the transitional thunderstorms.
Since I’ve been working on my garden, visits have been regular from a new little rabbit friend I’m so in love with. On Friday, while I was finishing up, this little one was waiting for me to come out and do so.
I sense this one is a little girl, but I have not received a name for her yet. She is as tiny as Blueberry was when he first came to visit last year. This baby has no fear of me and was just meditating in the sun when I came out to work on finishing everything.
I decided to sit with her for a while and she let me get as close as three feet away – I didn’t do anymore than that, just to make sure she stayed at ease, but she was as calm as could be. Only her little nose moved slowly, but she was peace-filled and loved the connecting. I started talking to her and telling her stories and she just listened.
I then went to work and she ended up hopping over to the garden while I was planting and watched me from under a bush. She stayed with me about 45 minutes until I was done and then made her way to the front yard.
She has such a sweet, playful energy, but is very wise beyond years. I’ve also seen her grazing on the grass and clover in the back yard while two chipmunks play all around her.
I love seeing generations of bunnies making this home and my intention with the garden is to create an even more inviting sanctuary for them and I told her to bring more friends. I’ve seen more little animals and pollinators than ever come around including hummingbirds, butterflies, bumble bees, all kinds of birds, chipmunks, squirrels, mice, lizards, and rabbit. I love it and so does Astrid.
I hope you enjoy this little look at our enchanted garden portal. It will be fun to see how it evolves over the seasons in reflection to my own life.
And speaking of little portals, remember that the big Labor Day Sale ends tonight for all little magickal portal creations in our Etsy shop with 100% going to a rabbit microsanctuary at:
There are many good morsels of information to chew on and digest in Lee’s new September Energy Update. Once again we’re going to hear the importance of self-care and going deeper at this time so that you can show up in an even bigger, more loving, and extra compassionately present way in the world. Healers especially have challenge around this, as you feel always to be giving outwardly or working hard, which fills your days with “being too busy” for any time for yourself.
Grief, with the birthing of new things is also on a high, and that can be grieving an old part of you, as well as an old way of life – not just around loss of people in your life. So, honoring the healing process will bring through the transformation.
Lee’s touch-in on authentic power I feel will have some good wisdom for you too. I especially like this:
“You can be the person who affects millions or you can be the person who affects two people.”
There really isn’t a difference.
Pushing yourself to exhaustion outside really reflects a desire to connecting and creating within, he adds. You’re not just here to bring through collective transformation, but to also experience your personal transformation as an extension of that. Remember, these are connected and affect one another.
Integration is important as well and that is supported by being more present, peace-filled, and grounded in your life, so that the external things anchor even more profoundly.
And through it all, listening to your heart, instead of only the voices in your head, will lead you into wiser actions. I love his personal example of all the things he thought he was supposed to do and that were expected of him from others, but when he tuned into himself he realized his body didn’t want any of that. He realized that no one would actually die or anything serious would happen if he didn’t meet those mental goals.
So the question to ask is:
“How does my heart feel?”
I hope you find Lee’s message supportive this month for what you’re navigating.