Be Soft, Be Strong
A short message that Astrid and I would like to share together. It’s about strength in vulnerability. The strength in softness and the power of a gentle heart.
You have been taught to keep fighting, to stay strong, be tough, put on your game face, and power through things. This can lead to a survival mechanism that keeps you enduring the hardships. However, it can also create a wall to deeper connection, intimacy, enjoyment, and pleasure, and keep you always at the surface.
At some point a big storm can hit that hardness and rather than bend with the winds, your tree may crack and fall.
“It’s the hard things that break; soft things don’t break. It was an epiphany I had today and I just wonder why it took me so very, very long to see it! You can waste so many years of your life trying to become something hard in order not to break; but it’s the soft things that can’t break! The hard things are the ones that shatter into a million pieces!” ~C. Joybell C.
Hardness, alone, protects and shields. It avoids the pain.
But it also avoids the pleasure and seals the cracks of light to your heart.
Hardness is the armor erected because fear of pain is so great, but isn’t true strength. And this becomes a heavy weight to bear, until you can’t bear it anymore.
The fight is an ongoing circle.
Surrender brings growth.
When you instead allow pain to be a guiding source to greater compassion, you soften into a more humble and inspired way of life. If pain hurts, then use that pain as a gateway to opening your heart to others who hurt too. Open your heart to the child within who gets sealed behind a wall if hardness, alone, sets in.
Softness invites a gentler approach and invites others to step forward in life, as well as invites opportunity for enrichment. Softness safely beckons your inner child forward to play alongside you.
When softness turns to push over, this can place you as a victim.
True softness is empowered compassion. It knows the balance of strength and gentleness and that the two do not have to live separately, but instead thrive in a marriage together.
You can learn the balance of soft strength or powerful softness. You can move in and out of each rather than being one or the other. This creates healthy and fulfilling boundaries.
You learn to be loving and compassionate, committed and fiercely empowered.