Monthly Archives: February 2021
Depending on where you live, February’s Full Snow Moon in Virgo reaches illumination either in the wee hours on the morning of Saturday the 27th, or anywhere in between that and the night before. The best view of it will be tonight, February 26th, which happens to be my birthday and will reach its highest point in the sky near midnight. I love that it’s called the Snow Moon and the reason is because typically February is the heaviest month for snow fall.
How perfect for this Winter Faery whose been on a snowy adventure navigating and braving new frontiers of experience for the past eight weeks. Every day has been an immersion into Winter Wonderlands that reflect the visions that inhabit my dreams. While I LOVE ALL seasons, the enchantment of Winter and snow is one I never tire of – very fitting as a Pisces water sign to love her seasonal realm of crystalline water.
I took this photo on Monday, February 22nd of this week while skiing at Vail on one of the most gorgeous days and also one of my braver days. It felt like a perfect reflection for the Full Snow Moon. As you can see, the Moon made her appearance, revealing her soon-to-be-debuting fullness.
According to The Old Farmer’s Almanac, this Moon also has connection to animals:
The Cree called this the Bald Eagle Moon or Eagle Moon. Bear Moon (Ojibwe) and Black Bear Moon (Tlingit) refer to the time when bear cubs are born. The Dakota called this the Raccoon Moon, and certain Algonquin peoples named it the Groundhog Moon. The Haida named it Goose Moon.
Again, so fitting, as I have a strong connection with bears you might recall from my mention of them as messengers many times in dreamland. I am also very connected with geese and the avian family at large.
And speaking of geese, a silly goose I am and always will be.
I’m constantly laughing at myself, finding the humor, and embracing the opportunity in each moment to be silly and have fun. Sometimes that includes laughing until I’m crying and nearly can’t breathe (which has happened quite often on this trip), running around like a child saying innocent things with funny faces to convey it, or free falling into the snow in the middle of snow shoeing like the photo above.
Laughter and play go hand-in-hand for me.
Play is liberating and opens you to new possibilities. It opens your heart to the wonder and helps you to find magick all around you.
Play helps you to break from inhibitions and detach from needing to know. When you play you unleash your essence, come to know yourself more, and connect with the child in every one you meet.
Playing invites you to dance in spontaneity and turn the heavy into light.
It doesn’t matter your age. These are the things that keep you ageless.
When you invite playfulness into your life more, you’ll find yourself feeling a little more free and like anything is possible.
The expansive and majestic vistas I’ve had opportunity to see the last couple of months have been the perfect landscapes to support the unlimited potential innate to us all.
And while the perfect realm for this watery spirit, it has also been the perfect realm for continued embodiment and merging of the earthy counterparts I carry strongly as my native being as well. My strong Capricorn counterpart has also been nurtured into greater fullness, finding sanctuary in the high altitudes her mountain goat heart thrives in. We’ve been sleeping at nearly 10,000 elevation and soaring up to nearly 13,000 and it’s all felt like home to me.
Snow and mountains….what more perfect an adventure for a sea-goat. 😉
And it’s not just the mountains I’ve been learning to descend sure-footedly, but also the mountains I’m seeing myself capable of ascending to literally and metaphorically.
These captures of me in my “spacesuit” feel like a great way to reflect and anchor in the start of this new cycle for me. Not only will they tell the story of such a huge leap in growth I navigated through and opened by loving my way through fears, but they will mark for me milestones in courage and the gateways I opened for all things to be possible. I’ve learned new processes that can be implemented across the board and certainly will be for the rest of this year and beyond.
A cosmic traveler I am, navigating and implementing the journey of spirit in body as one.
Interestingly, I noticed on this trip that the more comfortable in integrated embodiment I’ve become, the more silver has been woven into my entire head of hair. So although ever-more impish, as one of my dear friends likes to call me, Winter has set in for good as the guiding wisdom and constant reminder that Spring’s hope is never lost.
Today I’m 48 in Earthly years and yet the hourglass of my soul creates it’s own gauge to navigate life by.
There are days when life invites you to dance with your imagination and linger there a bit longer than usual. These are the times you’re reminded of the fine line between what you imagine and what is, because they become one.
And these are the times that reflect to you the power of your creative energy.
The light codes shining through our days recently have been truly amazing, as you can see in the photo above. And they feel indicative of potential – the seeds of activation. The rainbow glistens and unusual orb-like beams of presence seeming surreal…as if from another world.
This is the way I see things in my visions when I imagine.
And the prismatic colorful glistens even showed up in the untouched snow, leaving us surrounded by blankets of rainbow prism crystals scattered across the land. I tried to capture all the crystalline gems sparkling, but the photo below was the best I could do and your imagination will have to join for the rest.
The snow carpets of rainbow prism gems were scattered across the landscape making us feel like we arrived in Wonderland itself.
Now imagine this multiplied to cover the entire surface and standing there in silence surrounded by the untouched crystalline magick glistening, as if sprinkled by the faeries for only your eyes to see.
If this isn’t pure enchantment, I don’t know what is.
This is imagination manifested into reality – well, my imagination that is.
This is how I imagine the reality in my visions and here it was before me.
And the more we allowed ourselves to be dazzled by this display, the more brilliant it became all around. The more we lingered in captivation, the more our imaginations built bridges to the sights before us and the two merged, multiplying and relishing in the joy of being unleashed.
The colors became more pronounced, twinkled with wonder, and put on a show, as everything came alive in rainbow crystal delight.
I love where imagination wanders and what it can manifest when left to its joy of creating.
You can infuse an extra little bit of magick in your life by engaging your imagination and giving yourself moments of possibility or joyful expressions even if just for minutes a day.
Your imagination doesn’t distinguish between real and not real. It’s all real and from this expansive space is where you create new realities by aligning you with manifestations.
Realities are becoming more fluid and much more instantaneously reflective of our visions, thoughts, and intentions.
So choose wisely, compassionately, and playfully. And choose to let go some times too, having fun running wild with possibility.
You might just find Wonderland inhabits the liminal space between your judgments and your joys.
And speaking of possibility aligning you with manifestations and creating new realities, as promised The Mentor Muse ~ Guiding Inspiration for Life’s Work Alignment is now open to receiving applications. I’ll be taking applications only through March 20th and journeying with only three people. You’ll find details and how to explore this possibility, obligation free, at the page below:
The ever-wise Astrid joins us today for a share about wellness derived from a balance of varied experiences we invite into the dance of life with us. It’s also about how living from the source of love in your heart, opens doorways to accessing your multi-dimensionality. The result – greater feelings of wholeness and well-being.
It feels like we’re constantly receiving the same theme messages over and over, but the truth is there aren’t any really new messages or ideas – there’s simply different perspectives they come through or evoke and different, perhaps more aligned timing they speak to us.
Because of these, the present landscape feels seeded with greater potential for openings, as a vast majority of the collective continues to slow down and is faced with more contrasting experiences.
Briefly, I’m happy to report that Astrid continues doing extremely well, her toe injury from losing her full nail has been non-existent since we arrived to our location of the last nearly three weeks, and she increasingly exhibits a deepening of joyful exuberance and loving connection that have added both comic relief and socialization sweetness.
While being displaced from her normal routines and realm on this trip, as well as having more confined spaces at times, could very well have made Astrid retreat into herself, permanently revert to triggered patterns from her past, or even worse – weighed on her physical well-being – quite the opposite has taken place. I’ve already written about how she’s been opening up even more and working through core fears, but today we thought to share some sweet photos and fun little stories to accompany her transformation because after all, a picture speaks a thousand words.
The reason she feels it important to share this, is because rabbits can be an extreme example for the same things we go through because of their sensitivities.
Rather than pull back, feel depressed, or become ill, Astrid has welcomed more layers of living to be part of her experience no matter the circumstances. She exercises, plays, has conscious introspection time, rests, eats and hydrates regularly, communicates, and engages connection by choice. All of which help her to maintain wellness and support an increased level of personal evolution for her soul in rabbit body.
She’s especially become fond of yoga, stretching, and meditation time with dad during the wee hours of the morning or in the evenings by the fire while watching a movie.
When ever dad gets the yoga mat out, Astrid makes a beeline to him and plops herself down right next to him, runs around or lays on the mat on her own, stretches, or engages Boojum to invite him to play on the mat with her.
In the mornings she sits quietly with dad during meditation or gives and invites loving connection to show that she’s creating space for this healing practice and supporting him with something she enjoys too.
This is all especially endearing to see, as she used to only engage with me and now she’s truly opened to the whole family.
Then there’s super Astrid exercise time to express her exuberant joy of life and being in body. This consists of her leaping, twisting, and hopping in place (called binkies), or racing around like a flash of lightning until she’s fully released the wave of energy spontaneously moving through her. One morning she demonstrated her amazing strength and agility running laps in and out of tight corners, then raced from one end of the room and did a flying leap over the 1 1/2 foot high, 3 foot long ottoman, ending with zooming right under our female cat’s body between her back and front legs, as she was mid-walking. She had me in stitches!
And of course the multitude of ways she shows her desire to connect, communicate, engage, and love from a vulnerable space that include anything from jumping on the bed with a good morning nudge to laying next to us while we are working, relaxing, napping, or reading, or running over and nosing us with desire for snuggles and kisses.
She also engages the cats by sometimes touching noses with Boojum, or hopping at them and stopping a few inches in front of them, then hopping or circling away in hopes they’ll follow her lead. Sweet Pea and Astrid are often found a couple of feet away under a bed or table sharing space silently. The females seem to engage on an intellectual level and when Boojum’s introduced it, it’s usually only about fun. 😉
There’s times she chews her wood, pine cone and cardboard, times she takes down her cardboard house and moves it elsewhere, jumps into or onto things, sits on a chair demonstrating her bigness, times she lays with and licks her amethyst or stuffed friends, times she sits tall and still like a Buddha bunny, and times for the new hard flop into a tranced-out deep sleep. The hard flopping is different for her, but oh so good to see. When a bunny flops on her/his side it’s a sign of complete and utter vulnerable comfort and trusting surrender to feeling safe and loved. It took her a while to do this from when I first took her home and then she only softly would, but now there’s the full-on free-fall flop.
The more she engages on a variety of levels, the more possible avenues of joy she creates and the more she derives comfort in all the parts of herself and what being in body has gifted her opportunity to experience in this life. And the more she nurtures a more well-rounded approach, the greater her well-being.
I’ve found the same true for myself and people I know through friendships or work – the more we open to the variety of ways our souls have ability to express themselves because of being human, the more we create wellness by providing open channels for energy to do what it wants most to do – flow through. And even if we have a restriction in one way, as limitlessly creative beings we can find other ways to channel energy.
For instance, Astrid can’t speak like we do, but she has found many ways to express how she feels through other kinds of sounds like grunts, thumps, teeth chattering (their way of purring), or through bodily movements like giving a quick shake to her head and ears with excitement, leaping in the air, racing around with joy, nosing you to ask for something or exchange a love message, following you and laying close to share connection, sharing a rare lick to demonstrate affection, tugging at your pant leg or sock to get your attention, or jumping on the bed to welcome the morning.
But as we know, balancing our lives remains an important aspect to wellness. If we are too out-weighed in one thing of any kind, we can create underlying blocks that express as feelings of resentment, anger, blame, sadness, frustration, boredom, etc. without realizing that we are limiting our experience of life by limiting how we choose to focus all of our energy. This can also start to create tightness in our bodies or other kinds of physical discomforts or challenges simply as a reminder to move our energy in a variety of ways. And movement doesn’t just speak to physical movement, but also creating outlets to channel the different parts of ourselves and energies so they don’t become stagnant.
Astrid could easily create literal “blocks” or blockages in her sensitive digestive system if she doesn’t keep moving energy and sampling the possibilities that opening her heart to more can provide.
Rabbits demonstrate the natural energetic flow that is so vital in the way that they must always have their systems moving in order to thrive, or how they need to move in order to help push through blocks.
If she lets fear, for instance, take over energetically….she can literally become debilitated. If she doesn’t eat or exercise properly…she can experience physical shut down.
So, she’s chosen to surrender to life no matter her circumstances, and with my loving support and encouragement, continues to experience a wider range of possibilities that more authentically reflect her multi-dimensionality.
Our hearts are incredible portals to amazing things. They are the source of more than we have yet to understand and by living from these amazing portals they provide us access to a myriad of experiences that would otherwise be limited.
Astrid’s multi-dimensional experiences used to be only limited to her inner world where she traveled both as a means of escaping the pain of her circumstances before her and the only option she had given those confined circumstances.
But once love found a way to open her heart through our connection, she realized that she no longer had to protect it nor keep her parts separate…she could channel and integrate her ethereal experiences through the enjoyment of actually being in a body now also capable of sensual enjoyments only the physical can provide. And whether that be opening to the feelings she didn’t think were possible to experience, engaging in ways she was afraid to trust before, or allowing herself to surrender into the body she always preferred hovering outside of more than being in it, she discovered that multi-dimensionality meant being able to have well-rounded experiences on every plane of existence.
I’m convinced that Astrid wouldn’t have made it much longer if we hadn’t met. As strong as she was, eventually the separate life she lived, in not being able to express her soul fully through her body, would have created a full detachment at some point. She was a butterfly living inside a glass container. Now she’s able to stretch those wings and access more layers of experience.
And this is what she wants to express to each of us.
We all have potentials of expressions beyond however we feel limited in the moment. By the nature of our being multi-dimensional, we have a multitude of ways to bring through our energy and the more we surrender to possibilities, the more possibilities we create. The more we open our hearts, the more the doorways of multi-dimensionality find an access point to weave through greater experiences of fulfillment.
Astrid, as a rabbit, may have needed someone to hold that space for her, but we as humans have greater possibilities that can come through other (any encounter, partnership, companion, friend, family member, loved one, teacher, or mentor) in the same way, or through ourselves holding that space for our inner child and essence.
But like Astrid, the more ways you move energy through you by opening to and engaging a variety of experiences, the greater balance and well being you will create because this mirrors your multi-dimensional essence, which is part of what we’re activating more of collectively. The smaller we play and the more limited place we play from, the more we separate rather than unite who we really are.
We each have layers to who we are. And these layers brought forth invite more to the table, individually and collectively.
Like Astrid is the loving, the playful, the wise, and the amazing – so too are you the loving, the playful, the wise, and the amazing you.
At six weeks into our trip, we only have three remaining before heading home. I continue to balance personal time with a low-key flow of work that feels manageable and harmonious, without taking on anything new. My focus, while away, has been on moving through and completing what I can of only previous client projects or sessions that began before this trip, while also prepping for the upcoming new 2021 classes and where I’m headed next. I had to close out everything in order to not feel overwhelmed and still have my own space to fulfill what I need during this time. Balance is always a main focus for me and so I did actually take the first two weeks of the trip completely to myself without any work, just to detach for a while. And since, have slowly woven in work again.
One of the projects I’ve been slowly moving through are some new Sacred Tattoo Designs that have felt very aligned energetically to be immersed in – a mother and daughter dragon duo. One is a Water Dragon Fae Queen and one is a Fire Dragon Empress.
I thought I’d share some photos and close-ups laced throughout this short update post for you to feel into, as I always find these designs to support threads within the collective layers.
I’ll be working on another here shortly that feels to be a multi-dimensional map of the Great Mystery to navigate by. I’m needing a lot of time to process the intent, vision, and understanding around this, so I’m not sure how long it will take or how it’s going to evolve…It’s quite humbling to be a part of.
And then I’ll be moving into a very special Intentional Art painting I’ll be working on that has very deep purpose and that I’m almost overwhelmed by the invitation to have honor to create. Again, very humbled by this project and with both, hoping and trusting that I can access the channel to bring through the highest vision for each. They both feel to be a challenge that will stretch me into a new layer of growth.
After that returning to a final sacred design piece meant to weave into a previous story…ought to be fun, fun, FUN!
I don’t know how much I’ll complete of these in the next three weeks, but likely I’ll have at least the first design done and initiate a beginning with the next.
I’m not feeling called to reopen custom sacred tattoo designs or intentional art designs/creations, as I have enough on my plate and while enormously nurturing to my creative side, they also take a lot of focus and energy. So, I’ll be continuing to take a break on these indefinitely.
One of the updates to share is about the 2021 new classes. The Intuition and Reiki class was previously scheduled for February 7th, but I had to change the date in order to support the signs coming through and some unexpected shifts. I was very grateful that the students already signed up were in alignment with the changes, and in many cases relieved. I got the sense that what unfolded was because February was a month needed to continue to integrate, complete, and rest, before beginning the new.
This change ended up creating a shift to both classes, as I felt guided to switch out the March 14th class with the Intuition and Reiki one and move forward the Crystal Healing & Reiki class from that day to later in March.
So the current line-up is now Intuition and Reiki on March 14th and Crystal Healing & Reiki on March 28th – each taking place within a New and Full Moon energy doorway.
These classes can be found here: 2021 Classes & Upcoming Events
Only the Crystal Healing & Reiki class has some openings, so if the first date didn’t work for you, perhaps the new one will.
You do need to have had Reiki training in order to take these classes, as we will be working with symbols in conjunction with the material.
If you have any questions about these, please Contact Me.
I’ve been receiving inquiries about sessions and when I might open these up again. I’ve needed to close them so as not to take on too much while creating space for myself during our time away. So, I’ve only been finishing to work with clients that started up with me before the start of 2021.
That said, I’m going to reopen sessions in March, but just for that month to support those of you who have asked about this, anyone who wants a check-in about where you’re at with things, or help with finalizing any healing changes you’re making or next step shifts toward your goals.
Come April, I’m shifting gears in order to have time to devote to where I’m guided, so if you want to get on the calendar for March please book your sessions now so we can assure the days and times that work mutually will be available.
You will find two options of sessions at this page: Intuitive Energy Guide One-On-One Sessions to include either a One Hour Optimizing Session without Reiki or a One-Hour Optimizing Session with Reiki Healing Attunement.
Unfortunately, I’m unable to offer any discounts at this time, but there are session bundle options that are discounted if you decide you’d like more than one. If you don’t find the number of sessions that work for you on that page, please contact me so I can create a special package with you. And please contact me also if you have any questions.
If you feel you want a larger bundle of sessions and are wondering how that works if I’m only opening for March – in these cases only, if our work together extends past March to complete your package that will be the exception. But again, we need to get these on the calendar as soon as you book so I can map out my schedule because I will have more limitations once we get into April.
Another thing I wanted to address, since I had a couple of emails about this, is Online Reiki Classes.
I didn’t have any particular plan with this for 2021, but if enough people are seriously committed, I am open to considering to put together a Reiki Level 1 Class – the sooner the better (I may be able to do something in the first half of April since I have two classes in March already). Please Contact Me as soon as possible if this calls to you, so I can assess whether or not it makes sense to try to schedule something around my projects.
If there’s a big nudge like last year’s clear one of people feeling the same level of importance that opening to this path and raising their vibration at this time would mean to them, then I’m sure I’ll receive the message and it will be obvious how it works into my plans already.
Another option could be to train with one of my students who is already teaching, or is about to teach, if I turn out unable to do this in a time period that is mutually supportive. In this case, I could put you in touch with the teacher I feel matches you most energetically, or provide you with a couple of teacher options that you could connect with to see who calls to you.
And last, I keep mentioning that April will be the shifting month for me where my schedule will be limited due to transitioning into a new mode. Some of that involves personal projects and the other portion of that is looking to involve a very limited and exclusive 1:1 offering I mentioned before: The Mentor Muse ~ Guiding Inspiration for Life’s Work Alignment.
This will be the only service I’ll be offering, other than the potential online Reiki class, after March. In fact, April will likely be the launch. I’m still working on the details to create a separate web page for, but here’s a reiteration of what this basically will involve:
This will be the most intensive and exclusive one-on-one offering for supporting a comprehensive approach to manifesting a new path that turns your purpose and passions into your career, while also transforming your life so you experience the fullest expression of your spirit potential right now. Because of the intimate level of highly-focused, consistent work this will involve over the course of a longer period of time, it will be devoted to only three people. This will include a set number of Zoom, Facebook Messenger, and/or phone sessions over the course of our work together, weekly check-ins, unlimited email support, individualized processes and customized material to support each person. I’ve thought about this a lot and I don’t believe there are cookie-cutter ways and programs, as each person has their own energetic frequency that works uniquely, so this is not going to be a standardized module program like you might find elsewhere. I’ll work with each person organically to devise our approach for helping you with your goals.
I’m planning to have a short application for you to fill out with the potential of a free 10 minute call to make sure that this is the right fit for both of us.
If this has been of interest please Contact Me and you’ll be the first to receive info once it’s ready to go.
And that’s a little update on the other side of life for me, since I’ve been sharing mostly about our adventure away and the growth it’s offered both me and Astrid.
I hope everyone had a sweet Love Day yesterday and did something extra special for yourself, as being in a relationship with other is not what Love is only about. It’s about the relationship you have with yourself and sharing love with you, now and always. The rest will be a reflection of that.
Winter Wonderland wishes of magick and warmth for a Happy Love Day from our hearts to yours 💙 May you discover the source of love beginning with you and may every day be an invitation to open your heart more, share kindness, be compassionate, look through eyes of wonder and find the gifts and joy where no one else does, and blossom even though the frost has set in. ❄
Enjoy this stroll through the enchanted forest here we’ve been enjoying. These are from yesterday’s snow shoeing adventure about a mile and a half further up from our regular snow shoe area, where we found another interesting twin marker like I shared before (Sasquatch?) amidst the magick. I love the green bursts of life peeking through the flocking.
Love, wonder, and giggles to all!
On yesterday’s Chinese New Year of the Ox (my native zodiac), day thirty of skiing this Winter season, while protected and overseen by Ullr, the Norse God of Snow, I hit a milestone on my journey with fear. The fear I’m referring to has to do with heights associated with being on edges like riding chair lifts and skiing down mountain runs. The milestone was going down a Black Diamond run for the very first time and having fun doing it.
For anyone new to skiing, as I was, ski slope colors refer to the steepness of the gradient and the level of difficulty. Green is Beginner, Blue is Intermediate, and Black is Expert. That said, there are many levels in between and these are very loose terms in my opinion, as I see people of all levels on various runs. Also, you don’t have to be what you think might be considered an “expert” to go on a Black Diamond run. You simply, in my opinion, need to have courage, but indeed you need to have some level of skill to safely get down, especially in terms of turning and being in control. “Double” of any color means more challenging…for instance a Double Green is more like a Blue or Intermediate with more steepness, and so on. I find also that every ski resort has different ideas about what they think each level is and where you might not feel comfortable on some in one resort, on others you would. So you need to ask questions to the staff and explore for yourself. Also, I find some Green runs at resorts to mostly be cat tracks – paths used to move around the mountain, rather than actual runs. I tend to not like these and don’t consider them really great for learning to ski because they are narrow and don’t really allow for turns and practice. And if conditions aren’t great, they can be icy too. That said, they ARE sometimes the only way down the mountain so are necessary to be familiar with.
If I had to label my level of skiing I’d say I’m at the beginning end of Intermediate. However, I like how Jeffrey Weidel breaks down the three main color-coded levels further into nine levels, which speaks to me more. According to his breakdown, I’m at Level 4, edging ever-so slowly into Level 5.
But these are just ways of understanding categories and to give you a little understanding of things in reference to the main theme here – working with fear.
So, back to that milestone I hit yesterday, which to me isn’t just about a fear of heights and edges, but spoke to my making friends with fear in general and how I have been teaching myself to navigate it on my own terms.
As I mentioned in my last blog, “my skiing approach is one of enjoyment, not achievement.” And this has been the key for me in how to reprogram fear, no matter what the fear involves.
It’s also about honoring my needs and supporting that.
Rather than take something I’m afraid of and try to make it a system of how to progress to achieve a certain level or status, I’ve made it purely fun without any agenda, and my learning to be something I’ve decided to be my own coach of so that I can provide the kind of nurturing and motivation I know speaks to my inner little girl – a marriage of the wise adult and the innocent child. I become my own parent or instructor based on the knowledge of my fears and how I can engage them to feel safe and join me, rather than want to run away.
That doesn’t mean that getting a good ski instructor isn’t a good idea. Ski instructors are great no matter what level you’re at, to help refresh or take you to new levels. However, I’ve found that for me at this point, my own coaching is most nurturing, as part of the repatterning I am doing has to do with my approach to things. So, having someone overseeing and controlling that right now isn’t helpful. I have had a few instructors in the past and retained the basics from them, but I also learned from those experiences that this is the more supportive approach right now for me. I also learned a lot more by skiing with Dave and what he’s shown me. He’s an amazing skier. So with the basics, I’ve been able to formulate my process intuitively and gently support growth.
You see, in the past I learned to “perform” and in many cases push through something with an old “race horse” mentality that quite literally was engrained within my soul history from lives as just that. It wasn’t about how I felt, but what I felt I needed to do – in many cases being for someone else and not myself. It was that old “suck it up” and dishonor what your feelings and process are, in place of what you are either told you should do, or is driven only by achieving.
I began to slowly reprogram that approach nearly 15 years ago, upon discovering it, but skiing has been the best gauge of change with this for me and the biggest leaps of progress from my work have come in the last few years. And this year, when the opportunity came from this Winter immersion adventure we’ve been on, I’ve been able to really bear witness to my process because of having so many consecutive days of skiing.
The most I’d ever skied in a season, previous to now, was sixteen days. The last two years sixteen days was my max and previous to that in the first years of my starting at this I had only skied a handful of days each season. Not enough to really shift a pattern. And with thirty days under my belt this year, it’s provided that consistent focus and commitment I believe anything takes if you really want to change something. I still have another fifteen possible days to add to this for 2021. So this year really is monumental for supporting transformation.
Without going into all of the details of how I’ve been retraining myself, my basic approach is to honor my feelings, consistently repeat runs over and over and over in a flowing way at levels I feel comfortable with that have a slight stretch to them (in this way making them feel more natural to me and giving me lots of repetitive practice), taking my time, enjoying nature all around me, staying ultra present, talking gently to myself and even giggling the whole way to help make adjustments where needed and to keep things light, pausing to take it all in, and celebrating the moments.
I explore different little off-sections of trails to introduce change so that I can feel the unknown a bit, but at my own choice. And when there’s a slightly more challenging run connected to my path, I will slowly introduce it by trying it once in between my runs. Even if I don’t do it again, it’s my way of stretching into the new space to support growth. Usually what I find is that when I do that, I actually return to my usual run with greater ease, skill and confidence. And if I feel like something isn’t going right or I don’t like the runs or conditions, I will not push anything. I do only what I feel safe and comfortable with, then stop.
Since skiing doesn’t come natural to me, being that I didn’t grow up doing it and don’t have any muscle memory, as they say, for it, I am having to create that now.
But the key in all of this is enjoying the process. If it’s not fun, then it becomes work and feels like the old way of force.
This is why I will also stop along the way to take in sights I see, explore, notice the details of the terrain and little fun things like the Gnomes you saw in my last post.
And yesterday was proof that my confidence and relationship to fear had shifted hugely when I decided to try the Black Diamond run.
There was build-up to this, as several days ago we were skiing at this same resort and I overhead some guys telling their girlfriend that the Black Diamond run next to where I was skiing was considered an “easy” Black run. Normally that wouldn’t get my attention, as I would have a huge block to Black. And many times I have the same block to a lot of the Blue runs too. So, I spent my day observing the Black run they mentioned while I rode up the ski lift because I could see the whole thing from that vantage point. I kept taking in the pitch of the slope, watched people ski down it at various levels including my own, and mentally was processing it.
I told Dave about it after we left the resort that day and that I was curious about trying it, but didn’t want to do it alone if I did. I never like to be on something steep by myself in case I fall.
On Friday we were actually supposed to go to a different resort – you have to make reservations with Covid – but due to snowy weather and the longer drive to that resort we decided to cancel and go back to the place that had the curious Black Diamond run and where Ullr, the Norse God of Snow directs his guardian aim because it was closer.
After skiing the runs I practice on for a bit, I asked Dave to try the Black run and tell me what he thought. He did and I remained curious. I didn’t feel a block or a huge “no” in me, but continued to have curiosity and felt like it was a good chance to try something more difficult. I felt that there was reason I had overhead the other people mention it, as if I hadn’t heard that I wouldn’t have thought it possible. And the only reason I was curious was because they said it was an easy Black Diamond, which Dave confirmed. Plus, I obviously had built up courage from all of my consistent practice.
That said, I still knew I was in for some steep terrain. However, I’ve been practicing like heck and feel confident with my control and turns even if not done like a graceful swan. I also had just gotten my skis tuned up and they felt better than ever to carve those turns.
So, I went for it. On my own accord. It wasn’t anyone else’s idea. I wasn’t forced. I chose it and was curious about it. Curiosity invites wonder and innocence to stay with us and softens the seriousness or feeling of pressure.
And off I went, with Dave staying with me to the side just in case.
In the past I would have froze, cried, stopped and took my skis off and walked down, or perhaps even fallen.
None of these happened and in fact I saw how both my practice had supported my ability to make slow, in control turns and my consistency and fun approach took the edge off of fear.
I still felt my heart beat, but I knew I could do it and I did. I was in control of my experience.
It was a huge celebration of what for me was monumental in experiencing the shift that had taken place.
I returned to the run I was doing before it and I saw how much better and even quicker I was getting down, after stretching my curiosity on the Black Diamond run.
I celebrated my milestone and Dave did too.
This is a post about possibility.
That you can learn anything at any age – I’ll be 48 in just a couple of weeks and didn’t start to really ski until my 40’s.
That you can move through any fear – my fear of heights is not little, but I’ve learned to find ways to walk hand-in-hand with it, rather than push it away or avoid it.
Today, February 12th, rings in the Chinese New Year of Ox – which is my native Chinese Zodiac sign. I feel an excitement about this year, although I feel there is quite a bit of work ahead. It feels like a year of solid focus on, and anchoring of, passionate pursuits and perhaps even, for some, greatest life path focuses. This includes collective projects and systems that will help shape the future.
As I wrote before about the Year of the Ox:
This will herald a collective year of building toward goals, solid commitment and consistency to manifesting tangible results, taking concrete steps rather than getting lost in illusions, possibility for prosperous enrichment and creative refresh, family, emotional unions, and value focus, and a rise in need of teamwork, loyalty, intuition, versatility, courage, ethics, professional discipline, solid efforts, and greater stability. Overall, it can be a good year for renewal, completing and grounding what was started, and opportunity for success in new ventures.
And yesterday we had a potent New Moon with six planets in Aquarius. The last time a New Moon was met with so many other planets in Aquarius was the birthing of the transformational era of February 1962.
The year may seem to have started off slow in some regard, but everything feels likes it’s working behind the scenes right now and may pop out later as if it came out of no where when in actuality a lot of preparation went into creating it. But like the Ox, steady, grounded, consistent action and focus – I would add from the heart and your essence – with the highest good of all always carried forth as you create the new, will build the kind of future we hope to experience.
And speaking of experiences we hope for, I couldn’t have hoped for better with our transformative time away so far. The last six weeks have helped to create a whole new experience for me with skiing, but more so with how to manage and process a fear. There’s been a lot of evolution and anchoring into knowing myself even more and how to create the type of experience that honors myself and my well being, while supports growth.
And with my embrace and action, the Universe has conspired with me to create joyful experiences and confirmations of my being supported and in the flow. On this trip I’ve been able to come to a place of bliss and saying I really love this when I’m in complete alignment and harmony with everything.
My skiing approach is one of enjoyment, not achievement. So, I do take time to take in everything around me, find all the hidden little gifts, and stay extra present in such a way I’ve learned to look for all the elements and navigate paths that are optimal to my desires.
And along the way magickal surprises show up like a whole family of enchanted Gnomes on my favorite run and mountain (Gnomes, mushrooms and Gnome houses galore! I had a photo of the house, but it disappeared – perhaps a portal just for me 😉 ), as well as the ever-powerful and magickal presence of Ullr, the Norse God of Snow, at one of my top three mountains.
Ullr is also known as the “Patron Saint of Skiers, the son of Sif and stepson of Thor, the God of Thunder” – interesting given a dream I had about Thor that was quite symbolic and a bit humorous, not long ago. “Cold-loving, bow-wielding Ullr (pronounced Oool-er) is said to be an expert skater, skier and hunter who would glide around the world and cover the land with snow.”
I love the snowflake he shoots with his bow and arrow! He directly shoots it at the direction of the run that I loved.
I feel watched over and extra-infused with heart and soul ingredients made for me. And it’s come through the experience of walking with fear and making it my friend. I ask it what it wants and needs and I support it with gentle love and nurturing.
Can you tell I have and create my own fun?
Even when all on my own, I’m in solitude bliss and find all the little bits of enchantment that feel like they’re put there just for me.
May we each find our way this year by the navigation of our hearts.
Happy New Year of the Ox!
What are you focusing on to create, change, heal, or complete this year?
Whimsical Wednesdays Dragons & Mythical Beings: Releasing Primal Patterns & Revealing Dreamscapes – Part 3
Today’s blog post concludes the intuitively guided series of connected dreamscapes that felt important to share, as they are layered with coded messages beyond what I’m even reflecting in interpretation. I’ve been sharing them after having integration time and letting them process behind the scenes, so in fact today’s dream is actually one I had on the night of Tuesday 2/2/21 of last week. You can read or revisit Part 1 and Part 2 at the links provided.
This dream is a little bit different and also connects my most recent sacred tattoo design project I’ve been working on, as you’ll see – I love how everything is always interconnected and aligned in timing.
On 2/2 the dream took me through a sequence of really big magick happening. I can’t even begin to describe what all was unfolding, but it was layered and all-encompassing, spanning across the Earth collective, but in a multi-dimensional way. I remember looking down in my hands and seeing a book in them that I received from an unknown/anonymous or unseen source. All I saw on the cover was, “Part 1,” in large lettering. I saw that there were two other books that had been given to two other people and theirs read, “Part 2 and Part 3” in the same big lettering. I remember knowing one of the people who had the second book – a student of mine – and the third was someone more distantly connected, but connected nonetheless.
Telepathically I was given the message that the books contained alchemical instructions for collective change, woven into story form. We each had been given the books because they were part of our path to help decipher, invoke as embodiment, and share/spread.
Then big animals appeared – again like in Part 1 – but this time singularly and slowly. The first I remember seeing more clearly was some kind of giant, ancient bird-like creature. I said an inward message on a telepathic level to whom ever was making them appear that was something like, “These others are not enough (referring to the animals being sent my way). If you want more from me you’ll need to bring on more.” Then that bird-like creature mutated into a huge dragon with an energetic force like nothing else. I had no fear. I was ready for something I felt was coming next.
The dragon infused me with its energy. I’m not sure if it blew it into me through its etheric, fiery breath or if it just transferred it through the strength of its emanation, but it was so massive in strength that I was pushed back a few steps by the thrust of its power. And as I stepped back, keeping solid balance without falling over, my legs sunk into the Earth with their touch and where I stood, a deep hole was created beneath me by the energy I now had within and that made me heavier and larger energetically than my small frame would otherwise seem to embody. The dirt felt very cool and soft – almost light like flour. The hole created by the energy impact was like one a dragon or dinosaur might be able to create with thrusts of their weight and power. So, it was as if the dragon and I had become one.
The dragon then told me that it was time to use all of my powers to support the collective. I was to activate all of my inner parts and then transfer them to others so we could create change – create the next Earth experience.
An ivory tipped wand appeared in my hand, which looked exactly like the one I have and was holding in some of the photos from my Winter Solstice Visual Spell to Activate the Light Within blog. I was then waving the wand and pointing it at person after person, transferring and activating within them, the same within that was awakened from the activation transferred to me.
And the dream ended, or that’s all I remember.
Of course the giant and prehistoric animal theme carrying both primal and primordial energy continues to weave through with the ancient bird-like creature and the dragon. And although there is some personal messaging in this and the other dreams, there is still the collective symbolism shining through.
Simplistically, the three part books spoke to the three part blogs, but in more complexity they feel to foretell that there may be three parts or processes collectively to go through, as the Earth evolves into this new paradigm. They also feel like different groups of souls that will be involved in each layer, in their own time, or coming of age based on the gifts they carry. Each person given a book felt to represent each of these soul groups energetically, so they were simply coming through an individual as a symbol of that energy. The three parts also felt like a personal message layered in there that has to do with my individual path and work to be shared, as its own piece.
The multi-dimensional big magick happening at the beginning feels like the alchemical process we’re involved in that will continue to expand and reveal itself.
I really loved the part where I said, “If you want more from me, you’ll need to bring on more,” referencing that what was being given so far although impressive, simply wasn’t enough. This spoke not just to my own courage and readiness for the bigger stuff, but as a representative of one of the groups, or collective at large since in fact these feel like collective dream messages, that we are all saying on some level that we’re ready for much more. “Give me all you got.” 😉
Enter the powerful dragon.
The dragon infusing me with its energy felt once again to be a DNA activation, much like the T-Rex of Part 1 had done through my crown chakra.
The hole beneath me felt like a deepening and grounding into greater embodiment and while larger in energy, the dirt remained soft and fluffy…So, in fact the core, root, and underground layers we’re peeling away are not as dense and sticky moist as we thought, but instead are easier to move through and lighter than we would have imagined, once we penetrate the outer layers protecting the soft, vulnerable core.
Things only seem hard, impossible, or slow, but in fact once we embrace our authentic powers, then the process can be lighter than we imagined.
The hole in the Earth felt like a transformation to the surface of things, morphing into a new terrain of experience that runs deeper than meets the eye.
The two of us becoming one – dragon and me – is a transmutational merging of energies, as well as the difference between a dragon slayer and dragon master.
The dragon slayer sees herself/himself to be separate from the dragon and that all it stands for in its primordial ways is something to fight, conquer, or destroy. These are the enemy. So the two will always be separate and one will always lose or win in a vicious, repetitive circle.
The dragon master sees no difference between the dragon and herself/himself and all that it stands for is a part of both of them. Therefore there is no enemy. Nothing to fight, conquer, or destroy. Only something to embrace, love, and understand for its value. So there are no longer two – only One. And they merge more powerful than either ever was on their own.
So my facing the dragon without fear and taking in its fiery energy transference, spoke to that transmutation into wholeness of power. Again, feeling much more collective than simply something I was individually going through and yet creating a trickle effect by doing so, myself.
The dragon saying it was time to use all of my powers and inner parts and transfer them to others spoke to me how we keep being told that the time is now. That what we’ve been waiting for and whom we’ve been waiting for is here now…is us. And there’s no greater time than to bring forth all that you are, shine your light, and by doing so will be supporting others to do the same. Transfer the power to one another through your individual gifts. Share the nuggets of awareness, spread the love, speak the language as only you can, through your specific frequency. Realize that every bravely kind encounter activates something within each other. This change from the inside will create the change on the outside.
The wand was an activation of awakening to everyone encountered. It speaks to being a conduit for love and awakening thread to thread of the tapestry, each in their own way. Some perhaps more visual and outwardly active, and others behind the scenes or quietly active. It also seemed to reiterate or confirm the guidance I received in sharing that Visual Spell blog to help activate the light within. Although this dream came after that, there is no time in the dream world and one might even say that this dragon dream experience was before that one and what I did through that Winter Solstice blog was a result of the activation transfer and message received “later.”
I find the primal or primordial energy thread in these dreams to be an alchemical key to our collective unfolding. And they are showing up in waking life as well. There have been other smaller confirmations of dinosaurs, dragons, and ancient winged creatures, but far too many to document all, so I focus on the main ones that speak louder. As I shared about the T-Rex statue and Dinosaur Museum sign confirmations in Part 1, the primal energy of Boojum our male cat in Part 2, and for Part 3 the waking life confirmations of these came through my recent sacred tattoo design project, as well as a close encounter in the forest.
The former being another first for some “Spiritual Skin” creations.
Synchronously, I’ve been working on a pair of sacred dragon tattoo designs for a mother and daughter. Each to have their own dragon and energy, but connected via some of the elements woven into the designs. The daughter is a Fire Dragon and the mother is a Water Dragon in Chinese Astrology. We added their birth or chosen flowers, symbols and Runes for their elements, the Moon and Sun/Fire Ball, and some connective Runes for both of them along with a touch of Cosmic Starry essence. (I might share more photos/info in another blog post upcoming.)
One is a Water Dragon Fae Queen and one is a Fire Dragon Empress.
This project was commissioned long before the dream and the timing of their creation was in order of completing the ones before them. This placed the dragons at the time, and integration after, of the dream. Fire and Water feeling especially potent to the alchemy of merging these powerful elements. Every time I work on a design it not only feels important for the person it is created for, but always carries collective support as a portal of activation on all fronts through that individual’s activation.
Much like the message of the dream to share the power with others that we activate within ourselves.
Then there was the close encounter, which took place this past weekend. We went snow shoeing after and during snow storms where we are in very fresh, deep snow. We have a huge forest and mountainous area right behind the place we’re staying, much like at home where we can hike or snow shoe out the back door.
We took some photos along the day’s adventure, which included this one:
It felt like a deliberate, perfect structure and the energy was strange. I was wondering in the back of my mind of what creature might have made it and often joke with Dave about Sasquatch on our hikes. We found some odd tracks that led to this structure that were not human. We thought perhaps a large animal had made its way through the very deep snow by what they appeared like…maybe a moose. It was a very quiet day and we could hear the trees creaking in the wind and no one else out, unlike the last weekend where we had come across several people. I had a strange feeling, but couldn’t put my finger on it.
Then I posted the photo, not thinking more of it, and a magickal friend of mine in Ireland relayed that it was an actual Big Foot/Sasquatch structure and that according to “experts” the cross marks the perimeter end of their territory. I used to watch many of the sightings programs back in the day, but had forgotten much of these kinds of details. Then two more confirmations of the same information came in from separate sources. It confirmed the feeling I had and while many might not believe in these beings or think they belong in the mythical creatures category of fireside storytelling, there are those of us who feel otherwise being that we live in a multi-dimensional world where portals, different timelines, and otherworlds merge. These make anything possible.
Regardless of fact or fiction, the connection that was brought to awareness of a primitive and primal creature with ancient or prehistoric connections, still held the theme of these dreams.
Now the energies and encounters were crossing dream into waking life and the merging of hidden into the light continues.
Interestingly, a few days after the dragon activation dream, I had a wedding dream. The dream was my own wedding happening all over in a different way, but again what’s mine is yours, so to speak. 🙂 It was being orchestrated on some other level from behind the scenes (much like I felt ours on Summer Solstice was) and being taken care of and put together without my having any part in it, but showing up. It was taking place in an expansive space with many people and an other-dimensional feel to it. I remember thinking this is odd, I’m already married, already had the wedding, but it was happening on a different plane of existence parallel to the other.
This isn’t Part 4, but a new beginning from all of this – a merging of parts, like the marriage of yin and yang partners, a symphony of new and primal/primordial notes, the partnering of elemental dragons within a family, and dream and waking life as one.
I believe we will continue to experience more cross-overs the more we create bridges through the portals of our hearts. Then we’ll realize separation is a choice and not a given.
Please take or leave what you choose from any of this. I share as I’m guided. I’m just being my part.
As promised, today’s Ask Astrid blog is the sequel to Wednesday’s Part 1 that shared the same title. It involves a precognitive dream I had about Astrid a few days after the collective dream involving the wild and prehistoric animals I chronicled in that post. I didn’t realize at first that the same theme ran through it until days later, as I continued interpreting and integrating the message. There were of course personal energies involved, but they reflected the bigger picture moving through me, and as a result, also moving through Astrid since she and I always go through similar things even if in different ways.
I often have some of my clearest and most telepathic or precognitive dreams come through my rabbit companions – on and off Earth – as well as my Russian tortoise, Gaia. I remember one many years back where Nestor let me listen through her ear and I journeyed through it to where my parents lived (far away from me at the time) and heard an exact conversation they were having, which I relayed to them and got confirmed the next day. It was her way of showing me that the telepathic lines were open to receive clear messages through our connection and through telepathy itself.
From then on, the telepathic channels between me and my beloved soul companions who once did, or currently do, inhabit animal bodies have been opened and I receive powerful messages to assist the shift of times through my personal experience of it.
That kind of profound dream experience has happened with Nestor, Joy, Cosmo, Gaia, and of course, now, Astrid.
But this dream I had last week was a psychic one, and what unfolded in waking life ended up having the connection to the theme from the previous one. I didn’t know until a couple of days later that it would turn out to be precognitive, but it did indeed foresee what was going to happen to Astrid and its immediate effects on both of us.
In the dream I saw Astrid after some kind of incident/accident had taken place. I didn’t know what the particulars were of how, but the result was finding her with the tip of one of her paws cut off. I remember feeling horrified about it and although it was cut off, I didn’t see evidence of blood, but could see inside as if it were hollowed out from where it came off. I looked around for a towel to wrap it in and remember having difficulty trying to figure out what vet to take her to for like an hour, as I was stressing over my sweet girl’s condition. That’s all I remember.
I woke the next morning feeling bothered by it and relayed the dream to Dave, as I usually do when I have very clear and detailed or odd ones. He told me it was just a random dream, as his way to assure me.
Well, a couple of days later, I’m woken in the middle of the night by noise downstairs. My intuition and mom instincts know immediately that it’s Astrid dashing around the living room like crazy, as a result of being spooked by our male cat, Boojum. I get out of bed because I can hear her continue freaking out and running about, and start to head down the stairs when in the dimly lit corridor I see her shadow sprinting up the stairs and the sound of her nails on the wood clambering and sliding about from her speed. She’s in flight mode and when she gets scared like that it’s hard to center and calm her for a while. The only thing she knows – that any rabbit or prey knows – is to run like heck and escape at all means. When she sees me she doubles back down the stairs leaping several steps at once and appearing to take a sliding side tumble (or at least that’s what I could make out in the shadowy dark), not expecting me to show up, and then turns back around and passes me, while heading under the bed upstairs to hide.
All I remember is being horrified by the sound and sight – just like in my dream – as I’m just thinking about her injuring herself while running blindly.
I continue down the stairs just to see if my instincts had been right and there was Boojum, sheepishly sitting upright in front of the opening to her pen, as if to say, “What? I didn’t do anything.”
I knew that he’d entered her area in the middle of the night to steal some hay or water while she was peacefully just laying there in her meditative/off-planet mode, as she does, and when she realized he was there it was too late. It felt like a stealth attack and her prey instincts put her in flight mode, feeling like she was threatened by this sneaky predator moving in the shadows nearby.
I immediately ran back upstairs to check on her and found her huddled under my side of the bed, scared. I talked to her calmly and was worried, wondering if she was alright.
I went to the center of the room in front of the bed and laid down to wait for her to come out and she did. That’s when I noticed her lifting her front right paw up now and then, as if it was tender to put weight on it. And then she stopped to sit and lick at it and groom her face and the paw. This was on and off now and then. So of course I panicked, thinking she may have broken, fractured, or sprang her paw.
I was a mom mess at 2 am.
Like I’ve done in the past with my babies, I decided to lay there on the floor with her all night if necessary. I remember once spending the entire night, awake, under the bed with Nestor when she was sick, in order to see her through the night.
So I grabbed my pillow and wrapped a towel over me (all I could find quickly) and laid by her side in the dark while administering Reiki and calling forth all of my healing energies and help. I did this for about two hours and she stayed next to me laying mostly still and only moving a few times in different positions. When she did move she was still lifting or licking her paw, but grateful for my presence, the energy, and my talking her through the fear to a place of centered calmness again. You can be assured I gave my all for love.
She nosed me a few times and after the last time she did so, she then made her way back down stairs, saying, “Thank you and I’ll be alright now.”
I felt her telling me she wanted me to get some rest, so I made my way back to bed, falling asleep while sending her more healing energy and praying for the highest good to unfold the next morning. I only slept a couple of hours.
I woke and checked on her immediately and she was doing her normal routines, eating, drinking, pooping – all signs we rabbit parents look for because they are crucial to their well being. But on rare occasion I still saw her pick her paw up slightly or lick it. Not often, but even if once, it’s enough to warrant worry.
I couldn’t see anything and there wasn’t any blood anywhere. I didn’t want to poke and prod too much in case of anything being broken. So, I felt that taking her to a vet was the better option than my digging around. The challenge being that the next day we had to leave to travel to our new location, it was a Friday, and we were in a small mountain town.
I searched online and found a local vet, five minutes away, but didn’t see anything about them treating rabbits or exotics. I looked up where we were going next and DID find a vet that treated rabbits there and had great reviews about their rabbit knowledge and care.
While I wrestled with what was in her best interests – waiting to get her to a rabbit vet, or taking her in immediately to a vet that didn’t treat rabbits, I went upstairs to get ready in case I needed to leave right away while I asked for a sign and the highest good to be clear.
As I made my way to the second floor, my eyes were directed to something tiny on the corner of the stairs. I bent to pick it up and discovered the puzzle piece needed.
It was Astrid’s nail – the whole thing! I know her nails because she has dark blackish-brown ones and they are very thick. So now I knew that she had lost a full nail in her frantic clambering on the stairs in the middle of the night. Oddly, there was no blood on it, her paw, or the carpets or stairs, and the end where it came off was hollowed.
So far, all of this mirrored my dream – the tip of her foot cut off (in fact turned out to be her nail), the hollowed out area where it came off was how the nail appeared, as well as no signs of blood. The towel I looked for in the dream to wrap her in seemed to end up being the towel I wrapped myself in for the two hours I laid with her and yes, I did spend time trying to figure out which vet was best, as I weighed all the options and played out the scenarios and how they would affect Astrid in the long run – just like how in the dream I stressed for an hour about the same.
Finding the full nail with hollowed end posed the concern that I might not be able to see the site of where the nail came off and it could get infected, and that with this kind of pressure to rip it off, perhaps she might have a broken toe or some other kind of damage.
I decided to call both vets. First the rabbit vet where we were headed to get their thoughts. They agreed that if I could get her in right away it would be better, to avoid potential infection. Problem was we’d be traveling Saturday, so couldn’t get her in that day and both vets were closed on Sunday, so Monday was only available at the new place. But to me, that was just too long to wait and wonder, or have things potentially go wrong. Still, I made an appointment there just in case, as they had barely any spots open, while I continued to assess the situation.
I then called the local vet to ask if they saw rabbits, see what they thought, and to relay the incident, as to me it felt like something that could be assessed even if not expert with rabbits being that dogs and cats can also lose nails.
To my luck, the technician that answered was very sympathetic to the situation, has had many rabbits of her own, knows how to handle them, and knows quite a bit about them. She asked the doctor if she’d see Astrid even though it’s not her specialty and the doctor was more than accommodating. She relayed that if any extra advice or meds were needed that the doctor would confer with rabbit vets she knew in other areas. They were completely full that day, but said if I could drop her off in the next half hour after their scheduled surgery that morning, they would fit her in in between the appointments that day and watch her for us in the meantime.
So, I took her right away. I was sad to have to leave her for a few hours, especially since we were traveling the next day, which meant she’d have to be in her traveling case two days in a row. I also didn’t like leaving her with an injury by herself, but with the pandemic, curbside drop-offs and pick-ups are the only way anyway.
Of course I spent those long hours away from her thinking of her, telepathically talking to her, and sending energy while I calmed myself down in the solitude of the mountain on a ski run all by myself awaiting the doctor’s call.
And I got the best possible news. The doctor called and confirmed that she had torn off the nail, but there was no redness, no blood, no swelling, or any signs of inflammation or tear to the skin surrounding it. Although it was a relatively new injury, it all looked fine. The soft inner part of the nail stub was still there (why I saw the hollowed out bottom portion of the nail) and she said that’s why her paw is sensitive. She said it’s like if we cut our nails too short and that sensitivity we’d experience. So if she happens to touch it a certain way, this is why she will pick it up or lick it, as it’s tender. But the good thing is, it is not a weight bearing toe that she lost it from. So this is why there’s only occasional tenderness experienced.
And, she examined the foot and toe and felt no breaks in the bone so didn’t feel it necessary to x-ray her. Even if her toe had been fractured, it simply would have to heal on its own, as there’s little they can do and she said that rabbits heal pretty quickly in this regard. That actually was the case for the human/part rabbit me 😉 as I’ve broken my toe and both feet in recent years and there was no setting involved – just natural healing time to mend.
The doctor noted the same as I did that Astrid didn’t seem to be in any major pain except for the random tenderness, which had already decreased since the time of first impact. We both agreed that meds didn’t feel like the right option since she continues with all of her normal behaviors, is moving around normally, and there’s no sign of infection beginning. Meds can mess with their digestive systems and eating behaviors. So, I was told to keep an eye on her and if any behaviors change or I notice infection beginning, her not able to stand on the paw, or bad odor from the paw (sign of infection), to bring her in immediately. The nail will eventually grow back and once it starts in a few weeks, it will grow strong around the inner soft part and she’ll be good as new. This vet said they actually weren’t going to be open this weekend at all, but told me to call her and she’d come in just for her, which was very sweet. Or, I could take her to the rabbit vet in our new location.
I went to pick her up and she was so happy to see me and go back home. She continued on with normal behaviors and I hardly saw her pick her paw up, if at all, and the next morning we were on the road with Astrid on my lap in her carrier doing amazing as she always does.
We arrived at our new place where we won’t be leaving again for four weeks, so it’s the perfect settled time to allow her nail to heal, while there’s a good rabbit vet close by if needed, and for both she and I to integrate all of the energy themes streaming through.
And it didn’t take her long to get comfy in her new surroundings. I was grateful to find there to be no stairs in the new place, wall-to-wall carpeting so it would be soft on her paws, and a cozy compact home for the family to be all close together. Since getting here I haven’t actually seen her lift or lick her paw like she was anymore and she’s continued with all normal behaviors. In fact, she’s zoomed around with exuberance, binkied, and flopped harder than I’ve ever seen her flop (even Dave remarked he’d never seen her do this) – all signs of one happy, healthy, secure bunny. And she’s continued to have a fully open pen 100% of the time with mutual trust between us.
She’s even found her new throne.
Don’t you just love all the cute, eclectic western boots surrounding her and the bears, moose, and fish on the ottoman guarding her that connect with the animal messenger theme of Part 1 and with how I keep mentioning the recurring appearance of bears in my dreams, the sighting of the moose a few weeks ago, and my being a Pisces (the fish, who inhabit the watery emotional depths of the sub and unconscious).
The boots feel to reflect the spirit of independence, confidence, endurance, the American dream, traditional values, and visions of the old South West. They also speak to New Frontiers and having a dream you’re not afraid to go after. And while they were the beginning of freedoms for some, they also stomped on the freedoms of others.
Astrid LOVES this chair so much and will sit in it while we watch movies at night, lay in it sometimes awaiting us to come home from our outdoor time, and sits in it at night while we sleep. How do I know that? Because I can see both the chair and her pen space from where I sleep at night and can see her shadow and silhouette of her ears peacefully sitting on her throne listening to the silence of the night darkness.
It’s a great vantage point for her to stay centered and aware of all that is around her. Perhaps assisting her to be more present and conscious with expecting the unexpected.
It’s been a huge relief to see her bounce back immediately and on her way to healing. It’s also been so beautiful to see her pick right back up and build upon all of her enhanced connective, joyous, and expansive behaviors she’s evolved into on this journey. The cats have even been hanging out with her more. We’ve witnessed more nose-to-nose encounters with Boojum and Sweet Pea hanging out with her under the bed.
And as for the tie-in with Part 1, indeed there is the connection to releasing primal patterns that came through the actual experience itself that Astrid went through.
She had a moment of vulnerability, like I did the day I could feel the streaming through of collective anxiety, and then got overwhelmed by the oncoming primal energy that Boojum in his predator and very raw, primal behaviors embody. He’s not a super spiritually focused soul, but instead has come into this life to be more base and core focused in his experience of life – to feel the sensual aspects of physicality, luxuriating in ego-based immediate needs, and being instinctual and survival motivated. In this way, he reflects to me Astrid’s T-Rex.
Boojum didn’t mean to harm Astrid, but the primal energy he carries was a trigger to the core prey essence that is embedded within Astrid’s DNA, even if she IS conscious of more. And when we aren’t present and grounded (she is often integrating and journeying off-planet or in the in between realms), then things can knock you off balance very easily. They can take you by surprise and cause trigger reactions instead of having the ability to respond with more presence when you are embodied and centered.
The wild and prehistoric animal dream in Part 1 spoke to the clearing initiation for big change coming through the purging and releasing of old core energies. These collective pools of untamed, primitive and survival mode instincts have been unconscious for so long and are now surfacing in order to integrate them more consciously through compassionate embrace.
On some level Astrid called this experience up in order to move through more of these patterns and releases, just as I was working through them after the dream, and we all are worldwide.
As I mentioned, we also seem to help buffer the energy for others, the more we each can work through the energies, and I feel that Astrid did her own share of that buffering in taking on the old prey/predator, victim/perpetrator energies. On a soul and higher self level, she wasn’t afraid to face this fear – one of the greatest she would have as a prey animal. And played out this triggering experience in order to move through it, just as I have been facing the fears of the mountains through skiing every day these past weeks so I can integrate the core patterns more of these unknown terrains and these vulnerable spaces.
And rather than have something really horrible happen, it was only her nail – the tip of the foot that represents Pisces, watery, unconscious energies (like the ocean the animals ran to in my previous dream) that broke off. But it was not a vicious or horrible injury. It was one that evoked tenderness, both in helping to remember the value of the incident and the energies through physical tenderness, and to represent the bridge to wholeness and healing – through a tender heart and more compassion and kindness.
This was demonstrated by how she’s held no ill feelings toward Boojum or either cat, when she could very well have gone into defensive mode with charging and grunting and running them off when they come around. She could also have allowed the old triggers to consume her and put her in fear mode, but neither happened.
Instead, I’ve seen her AND the cats both engaging one another more since we arrived to our new place and without animosity or fear. They have been sitting closer, edging into each other’s spaces, seeking to be with one another, and Astrid has even allowed Boojum to sit at the back of her throne above and behind her while she sits in it, with both of them at peace. There’s even been a lot of super cute engagement on Astrid’s part where we witness her literally hopping in front of Boojum back and forth, asking him to play with her.
Just as I wrote in Part 1, “the interaction confirmed for me that these energies only hurt us if we try to run from them, dismiss, fight, or even deny them. There’s a sense of their wanting acknowledgment and understanding of their place within the framework.”
Although Astrid was thrown into a core reactive place of panicked fear when Boojum startled her, it was evident after the two hours I laid with her doing energy work for the highest good that night, that she had moved through things and integrated it with my support.
We are both deepening into being bridges of compassion for the collective purging, as best we each can. And while the DNA redesign that we’re all experiencing is hugely transformative, it feels like it can be integrated with greater ease than one might think. It asks of us to be open to the possibilities, to expect the unexpected, surrender to tenderness, and to trust that things are in divine alignment for the highest good of all concerned.
So, Part 2 was about a revealing, precognitive dreamscape that prepared me for the unraveling of Astrid’s literal experience to release primal patterns. On some level, the dream helped me to process things on the subconscious levels so that I could be more present for her.
Yet, at the same time, it was a shared experience of releasing primal patterns, as I feel everything Astrid does as if it’s my own, and so we went through it all together. I got to have my triggered reactions to it all, breathe my way back to centering and empowerment, and together we harnessed love to walk us through it. Not to mention, I was able to look at my own old patterns of judgment or fear around these energies through those raw emotions that took place at 2 am in the full darkness of the night.
But when brought to light in the dawn of the day, the shadowy figures, horrifying sounds and sights, and raw fears all softened to reveal the heart’s resiliency through compassion and willingness to understand each part for what it is.
Of course there is so much more I could express about all of the symbolism that took place through this experience, but you may be able to uncover those pearls for yourself.
I actually thought that this would be the conclusion to this theme desiring to be channeled through, but in fact on 2/2/21, three nights ago, I had another dream that wants to be shared and within that dream I was specifically shown three parts. So, I guess there’ll be one more.
After having a little over a week to integrate one of my recent dreams and adding to it a second precognitive one, I continue to see how the animal world shows up in ways that help to understand messages and energetic landscapes we’re navigating. I’ve mentioned before how I feel animals and nature being messengers to help bridge the changes we are going through – bringing more grounding to the new visionary and spiritual ideas we are trying to manifest.
For me, I have always had very powerful dreams and experiences come through souls in the animal kingdom since I was a little girl. I remember recurring childhood dreams I used to have over and over about a giant blue whale, a horse that aided the little girl me through challenges, and ongoing animal messengers ever since. Many of these dreams have included precognitive and telepathic messages that I shouldn’t have known otherwise. These also happen without animals being involved, but more so with them. I often relay my dreams with people who are involved and surprisingly receive confirmations of details – sometimes exact conversations – dreamtime makes me privy to. They’ve also come through extraterrestrial dream experience sequences, but these are translating into more Earthly origins now – I believe in order to help drop into embodiment more and integrate spirit and flesh.
The first dream I mentioned having, felt collectively symbolic. It involved a very large herd of giant, wild, exotic, and prehistoric animals and dinosaurs all running from the trees on land, across the sand, and into a large water source – perhaps the ocean. They were not fleeing, nor had fear…they were simply running with focus into plain view on a very long, open stretch of sand. I remember having a similar dream before in the past, but this current one involved dinosaurs. In the dream I was not far from the stream of animals charging the water in harmony together (predator and prey alike) – a few yards at most, but was safely out of their way observing the scene. There was no danger imminent for me and I didn’t have any sense of fear. I stood there curiously watching the incredible vision of animals from across the globe and time – giant elephants, giraffes, other exotics, and then mixed amongst them were dinosaurs – many Brontosaurus and T-Rex in particular.
When I saw a bunch of T-Rex I felt to take precaution by finding protection under cover of what seemed similar to an over-turned, old military jeep – not from any real threat or fear, but from the unknown of their very primal energy. I laid low under it with a few other people that were now with me, creating a boundary between us. One T-Rex broke away from the very focused group heading to the ocean, and came over just like my instincts felt might happen.
He sniffed at the overturned jeep, finding the top of my head near an open part of the vehicle – not large enough to get at it, but enough to be able to smell and touch it. He sniffed at my head and then began to lick it, but didn’t do anything else even though he easily could have overturned the vehicle. I could hear him telepathically saying he was only teasing and not going to hurt me. Eventually he went on his way and I came out from under the vehicle to continue watching the animals soar by.
When I awoke I immediately felt these wild animals and dinosaurs reflected very old and primal collective core patterns, energies, and fears all moving through as part of the clearing initiation for big changes to come. Just like fossils, we continue to dig up these untamed aspects of self buried within the collective shared pool, primitive energies and desires, and deep survival instincts that have been running unconsciously. And this is what we continue to experience out in the world as a reflection of a huge purge of truths no longer desiring to be hidden.
Their running from the land to the ocean (collective energy water source) feels both like a cleansing or baptism of sorts, but also a movement from focusing only on the surface of things to acknowledging the emotional undercurrents that have long been running the show. The way to change is by having all of our parts revealed, acknowledged, embraced, and integrated. So this movement to water energy (deep core emotional and subconscious patterning), which has always felt like the missing key to building new foundations, felt like a good reveal in the dream. Unearthing the roots of things and not being afraid to face the feelings that have been hidden with them.
T-Rex prominence felt the most primal and ferocious of them all, showing me that we have yet more to see of this purge in energies across the globe and that the deepest and most raw things are finally being let free. However, the interaction confirmed for me that these energies only hurt us if we try to run from them, dismiss, fight, or even deny them. There’s a sense of their wanting acknowledgment and understanding of their place within the framework.
There was also a sense of a very deep crown chakra activation and DNA redesign that came through T-Rex with the sniffs and licks – much like my rabbits do when they channel Reiki through their noses and tongues. It is my sense that a literal physical mutation is taking place even though we may not see it yet. I believe we are and will continue to experience more accessibility to the light codes within our origins, as these temporal layers peel back and merge with the filaments of love.
Challenges give rise to who we really are and what is possible.
A huge frequency change is taking place, restructuring things from the core.
At least this is the message I received in interpretation. Everyone may interpret things differently and indeed there is more that is beyond words to describe.
The very next morning after the dream, while traveling to our new destination that week, I saw what felt like confirmation. We were journeying along the highway in remote, snow covered areas and I “randomly” saw a T-Rex skeleton statue on the corner of a street, in the middle of no where. It looked like the fossil statues you see in museums, but made of metal standing in the snowy mountain terrain. It was so out of place and yet it aligned with the message I received. That’s why it was meant to get my attention.
And if that wasn’t enough, right when we crossed the border into Colorado I saw a sign for Rabbit Valley while I held Astrid on my lap in her travel case (my soul companions in rabbit bodies that have returned to the Cosmos always send supportive messages and winks to me) and directly after it, a sign for “Dinosaur Museum” – again “randomly” out in the middle of no where.
Every time I would have a thought, come to some conclusion, or formulate an intent or understanding, the exact word, words, and visions would appear or be uttered within seconds of my having them – sometimes at the very same time. This of course is something that happens often for many of us – these synchronicities and instant manifestations – however it is increasing in frequency alignment and uncanniness, which speaks to me of multi-dimensional realities all merging.
Two days following that dream (on the six year adoption anniversary of my rabbit Cosmo who has departed) I woke with this out of the blue, heavy feeling of anxiety that stayed with me for hours until I skied these long luxurious runs in complete solitude at Telluride and later did a Reiki Healing Attunement. I checked in with myself to see where I might have any anxious feelings and determined that because of recent more vulnerable spaces I have reached, I in fact was feeling the collective. This spoke to the dream unearthing all of that old collective stuff and how I’ve recently felt like many of us are each buffering some of the energy, which likely is helping things not to ferociously explode more than it has for now. Evidence given by T-Rex and his actions with me in my dream.
And from the first full touchdown day in the new location after having the dream, until the last day before we left, there were daily visitations by so much wildlife. This included an unusual sighting, right before we got to our destination, of a couple hundred giant birds – what appeared to us as Great Blue Heron – in flocks feasting in fields along the road. We’ve never seen anything like it. I didn’t have my camera ready, so only caught a few of them at the tail end as you can see here. Our limited familiarity with the area pointed us to what we are familiar with seeing, but it appears these were most likely Greater Sandhill Cranes – the only species out of 15 types of cranes – that are found in this area.
These giant birds echo prehistoric flying reptiles of the past – and again felt like a tie-in with my dream seeing so many together in an odd display and having that ancient connection. They also speak to me of the Mystic, embodying so much stillness, serenity, grace, peace, and especially reflect solitude. Synchronously, the whole week following their appearance was a huge week of just that for me – solitude. And this helped to allow things to percolate and digest behind the scenes, while I was able to just “be.”
For some, that kind of alone time can be intimidating or isolating. For me, it’s deepening, connective, clarifying, and recharging.
I skied virtually on my own without hardly a soul, and most of the time no other souls, around me on these very long runs. One of them was 4.6 miles long and wandered through the winter wonderland that felt almost apocalyptic, as there was complete silence other than the soft swooshing of snow beneath my feet and not a person to be seen on the runs, nor in the village surrounding me.
It was like a journey in some far away deserted, faery tale land over and under bridges and softly flowing along in hours of silence.
And all of this supported that wave of collective energy I felt come over me at onset of the week and the continued theme of anxiety in a different form that came at the end of the week, which is part of the next dream.
It felt almost like the world didn’t exist other than my being able to feel the underlying energies very transparently last week. And interestingly, I was daily riding a lift named Sunshine Express, which complimented the lift you saw me share about previously named Moonbeam Express that I rode on the New Moon. In each case, riding the wave of a celestial new dawning.
The area of Telluride, Ridgway and Ouray we were in is truly majestic. I remember it from our RV days in the Magick Bus and some of the enchantment we experienced there including the rare encounter with a black shape shifting fox that seemed to be the doorway of big change on that trip.
The high altitudes always speak to my essence – the summit of Telluride is 13,150 and feels like home.
And speaking of home, we felt very welcomed in the area with all of the animal messengers of the week that showed up for us including two prairie dogs, many large marsh hawks, a bald eagle, seven herds of elk, four small flocks of wild turkey, and a sweet doe and fawn that we saw three days in a row in the very same place each time. The last time they were laying together, nearly nose to nose, under some brush.
Each animal carrying beautiful medicine for the journey and weaving a story of integrative transformation to help navigate the collective shift of energies that I was receiving through dream and waking life. They each showed up at aligned times that reflected just the perfect confirmation or support needed.
I wasn’t always camera-ready, but caught a few photos to share.
And on our first day out in the new area last week, while hiking in a soft snow storm, we were trying to find a trail along the river and ended up making our own for a bit. That’s when we stumbled upon Kuan Yin.
This Goddess or Mother of Compassion is very strongly connected to the animal kingdom and forces of nature and is known as “she who hears the cries of the world”.
Might her surprise appearance hidden out in the snow where no one else was wandering have also echoed my dream in messaging the need for each of us to call forth the depths of compassion for self and other during this shift we are sharing?
That this kind of heart opening is ever-more important while the world purges the painful past and old memories that have been locked away?
A way to be bridges for one another and to bridge the pain back to wholeness.
This leads me to my precognitive dream that involved Astrid, but came to be about so much more. I will share that in the upcoming Part 2, later this week.
Until then, I wish you all your own little “peace” of solitude in these deeply transformative times.