Winter Wonderland wishes of magick and warmth for a Happy Love Day from our hearts to yours 💙 May you discover the source of love beginning with you and may every day be an invitation to open your heart more, share kindness, be compassionate, look through eyes of wonder and find the gifts and joy where no one else does, and blossom even though the frost has set in. ❄
Enjoy this stroll through the enchanted forest here we’ve been enjoying. These are from yesterday’s snow shoeing adventure about a mile and a half further up from our regular snow shoe area, where we found another interesting twin marker like I shared before (Sasquatch?) amidst the magick. I love the green bursts of life peeking through the flocking.
Love, wonder, and giggles to all!
On yesterday’s Chinese New Year of the Ox (my native zodiac), day thirty of skiing this Winter season, while protected and overseen by Ullr, the Norse God of Snow, I hit a milestone on my journey with fear. The fear I’m referring to has to do with heights associated with being on edges like riding chair lifts and skiing down mountain runs. The milestone was going down a Black Diamond run for the very first time and having fun doing it.
For anyone new to skiing, as I was, ski slope colors refer to the steepness of the gradient and the level of difficulty. Green is Beginner, Blue is Intermediate, and Black is Expert. That said, there are many levels in between and these are very loose terms in my opinion, as I see people of all levels on various runs. Also, you don’t have to be what you think might be considered an “expert” to go on a Black Diamond run. You simply, in my opinion, need to have courage, but indeed you need to have some level of skill to safely get down, especially in terms of turning and being in control. “Double” of any color means more challenging…for instance a Double Green is more like a Blue or Intermediate with more steepness, and so on. I find also that every ski resort has different ideas about what they think each level is and where you might not feel comfortable on some in one resort, on others you would. So you need to ask questions to the staff and explore for yourself. Also, I find some Green runs at resorts to mostly be cat tracks – paths used to move around the mountain, rather than actual runs. I tend to not like these and don’t consider them really great for learning to ski because they are narrow and don’t really allow for turns and practice. And if conditions aren’t great, they can be icy too. That said, they ARE sometimes the only way down the mountain so are necessary to be familiar with.
If I had to label my level of skiing I’d say I’m at the beginning end of Intermediate. However, I like how Jeffrey Weidel breaks down the three main color-coded levels further into nine levels, which speaks to me more. According to his breakdown, I’m at Level 4, edging ever-so slowly into Level 5.
But these are just ways of understanding categories and to give you a little understanding of things in reference to the main theme here – working with fear.
So, back to that milestone I hit yesterday, which to me isn’t just about a fear of heights and edges, but spoke to my making friends with fear in general and how I have been teaching myself to navigate it on my own terms.
As I mentioned in my last blog, “my skiing approach is one of enjoyment, not achievement.” And this has been the key for me in how to reprogram fear, no matter what the fear involves.
It’s also about honoring my needs and supporting that.
Rather than take something I’m afraid of and try to make it a system of how to progress to achieve a certain level or status, I’ve made it purely fun without any agenda, and my learning to be something I’ve decided to be my own coach of so that I can provide the kind of nurturing and motivation I know speaks to my inner little girl – a marriage of the wise adult and the innocent child. I become my own parent or instructor based on the knowledge of my fears and how I can engage them to feel safe and join me, rather than want to run away.
That doesn’t mean that getting a good ski instructor isn’t a good idea. Ski instructors are great no matter what level you’re at, to help refresh or take you to new levels. However, I’ve found that for me at this point, my own coaching is most nurturing, as part of the repatterning I am doing has to do with my approach to things. So, having someone overseeing and controlling that right now isn’t helpful. I have had a few instructors in the past and retained the basics from them, but I also learned from those experiences that this is the more supportive approach right now for me. I also learned a lot more by skiing with Dave and what he’s shown me. He’s an amazing skier. So with the basics, I’ve been able to formulate my process intuitively and gently support growth.
You see, in the past I learned to “perform” and in many cases push through something with an old “race horse” mentality that quite literally was engrained within my soul history from lives as just that. It wasn’t about how I felt, but what I felt I needed to do – in many cases being for someone else and not myself. It was that old “suck it up” and dishonor what your feelings and process are, in place of what you are either told you should do, or is driven only by achieving.
I began to slowly reprogram that approach nearly 15 years ago, upon discovering it, but skiing has been the best gauge of change with this for me and the biggest leaps of progress from my work have come in the last few years. And this year, when the opportunity came from this Winter immersion adventure we’ve been on, I’ve been able to really bear witness to my process because of having so many consecutive days of skiing.
The most I’d ever skied in a season, previous to now, was sixteen days. The last two years sixteen days was my max and previous to that in the first years of my starting at this I had only skied a handful of days each season. Not enough to really shift a pattern. And with thirty days under my belt this year, it’s provided that consistent focus and commitment I believe anything takes if you really want to change something. I still have another fifteen possible days to add to this for 2021. So this year really is monumental for supporting transformation.
Without going into all of the details of how I’ve been retraining myself, my basic approach is to honor my feelings, consistently repeat runs over and over and over in a flowing way at levels I feel comfortable with that have a slight stretch to them (in this way making them feel more natural to me and giving me lots of repetitive practice), taking my time, enjoying nature all around me, staying ultra present, talking gently to myself and even giggling the whole way to help make adjustments where needed and to keep things light, pausing to take it all in, and celebrating the moments.
I explore different little off-sections of trails to introduce change so that I can feel the unknown a bit, but at my own choice. And when there’s a slightly more challenging run connected to my path, I will slowly introduce it by trying it once in between my runs. Even if I don’t do it again, it’s my way of stretching into the new space to support growth. Usually what I find is that when I do that, I actually return to my usual run with greater ease, skill and confidence. And if I feel like something isn’t going right or I don’t like the runs or conditions, I will not push anything. I do only what I feel safe and comfortable with, then stop.
Since skiing doesn’t come natural to me, being that I didn’t grow up doing it and don’t have any muscle memory, as they say, for it, I am having to create that now.
But the key in all of this is enjoying the process. If it’s not fun, then it becomes work and feels like the old way of force.
This is why I will also stop along the way to take in sights I see, explore, notice the details of the terrain and little fun things like the Gnomes you saw in my last post.
And yesterday was proof that my confidence and relationship to fear had shifted hugely when I decided to try the Black Diamond run.
There was build-up to this, as several days ago we were skiing at this same resort and I overhead some guys telling their girlfriend that the Black Diamond run next to where I was skiing was considered an “easy” Black run. Normally that wouldn’t get my attention, as I would have a huge block to Black. And many times I have the same block to a lot of the Blue runs too. So, I spent my day observing the Black run they mentioned while I rode up the ski lift because I could see the whole thing from that vantage point. I kept taking in the pitch of the slope, watched people ski down it at various levels including my own, and mentally was processing it.
I told Dave about it after we left the resort that day and that I was curious about trying it, but didn’t want to do it alone if I did. I never like to be on something steep by myself in case I fall.
On Friday we were actually supposed to go to a different resort – you have to make reservations with Covid – but due to snowy weather and the longer drive to that resort we decided to cancel and go back to the place that had the curious Black Diamond run and where Ullr, the Norse God of Snow directs his guardian aim because it was closer.
After skiing the runs I practice on for a bit, I asked Dave to try the Black run and tell me what he thought. He did and I remained curious. I didn’t feel a block or a huge “no” in me, but continued to have curiosity and felt like it was a good chance to try something more difficult. I felt that there was reason I had overhead the other people mention it, as if I hadn’t heard that I wouldn’t have thought it possible. And the only reason I was curious was because they said it was an easy Black Diamond, which Dave confirmed. Plus, I obviously had built up courage from all of my consistent practice.
That said, I still knew I was in for some steep terrain. However, I’ve been practicing like heck and feel confident with my control and turns even if not done like a graceful swan. I also had just gotten my skis tuned up and they felt better than ever to carve those turns.
So, I went for it. On my own accord. It wasn’t anyone else’s idea. I wasn’t forced. I chose it and was curious about it. Curiosity invites wonder and innocence to stay with us and softens the seriousness or feeling of pressure.
And off I went, with Dave staying with me to the side just in case.
In the past I would have froze, cried, stopped and took my skis off and walked down, or perhaps even fallen.
None of these happened and in fact I saw how both my practice had supported my ability to make slow, in control turns and my consistency and fun approach took the edge off of fear.
I still felt my heart beat, but I knew I could do it and I did. I was in control of my experience.
It was a huge celebration of what for me was monumental in experiencing the shift that had taken place.
I returned to the run I was doing before it and I saw how much better and even quicker I was getting down, after stretching my curiosity on the Black Diamond run.
I celebrated my milestone and Dave did too.
This is a post about possibility.
That you can learn anything at any age – I’ll be 48 in just a couple of weeks and didn’t start to really ski until my 40’s.
That you can move through any fear – my fear of heights is not little, but I’ve learned to find ways to walk hand-in-hand with it, rather than push it away or avoid it.
Today, February 12th, rings in the Chinese New Year of Ox – which is my native Chinese Zodiac sign. I feel an excitement about this year, although I feel there is quite a bit of work ahead. It feels like a year of solid focus on, and anchoring of, passionate pursuits and perhaps even, for some, greatest life path focuses. This includes collective projects and systems that will help shape the future.
As I wrote before about the Year of the Ox:
This will herald a collective year of building toward goals, solid commitment and consistency to manifesting tangible results, taking concrete steps rather than getting lost in illusions, possibility for prosperous enrichment and creative refresh, family, emotional unions, and value focus, and a rise in need of teamwork, loyalty, intuition, versatility, courage, ethics, professional discipline, solid efforts, and greater stability. Overall, it can be a good year for renewal, completing and grounding what was started, and opportunity for success in new ventures.
And yesterday we had a potent New Moon with six planets in Aquarius. The last time a New Moon was met with so many other planets in Aquarius was the birthing of the transformational era of February 1962.
The year may seem to have started off slow in some regard, but everything feels likes it’s working behind the scenes right now and may pop out later as if it came out of no where when in actuality a lot of preparation went into creating it. But like the Ox, steady, grounded, consistent action and focus – I would add from the heart and your essence – with the highest good of all always carried forth as you create the new, will build the kind of future we hope to experience.
And speaking of experiences we hope for, I couldn’t have hoped for better with our transformative time away so far. The last six weeks have helped to create a whole new experience for me with skiing, but more so with how to manage and process a fear. There’s been a lot of evolution and anchoring into knowing myself even more and how to create the type of experience that honors myself and my well being, while supports growth.
And with my embrace and action, the Universe has conspired with me to create joyful experiences and confirmations of my being supported and in the flow. On this trip I’ve been able to come to a place of bliss and saying I really love this when I’m in complete alignment and harmony with everything.
My skiing approach is one of enjoyment, not achievement. So, I do take time to take in everything around me, find all the hidden little gifts, and stay extra present in such a way I’ve learned to look for all the elements and navigate paths that are optimal to my desires.
And along the way magickal surprises show up like a whole family of enchanted Gnomes on my favorite run and mountain (Gnomes, mushrooms and Gnome houses galore! I had a photo of the house, but it disappeared – perhaps a portal just for me 😉 ), as well as the ever-powerful and magickal presence of Ullr, the Norse God of Snow, at one of my top three mountains.
Ullr is also known as the “Patron Saint of Skiers, the son of Sif and stepson of Thor, the God of Thunder” – interesting given a dream I had about Thor that was quite symbolic and a bit humorous, not long ago. “Cold-loving, bow-wielding Ullr (pronounced Oool-er) is said to be an expert skater, skier and hunter who would glide around the world and cover the land with snow.”
I love the snowflake he shoots with his bow and arrow! He directly shoots it at the direction of the run that I loved.
I feel watched over and extra-infused with heart and soul ingredients made for me. And it’s come through the experience of walking with fear and making it my friend. I ask it what it wants and needs and I support it with gentle love and nurturing.
Can you tell I have and create my own fun?
Even when all on my own, I’m in solitude bliss and find all the little bits of enchantment that feel like they’re put there just for me.
May we each find our way this year by the navigation of our hearts.
Happy New Year of the Ox!
What are you focusing on to create, change, heal, or complete this year?
Whimsical Wednesdays Dragons & Mythical Beings: Releasing Primal Patterns & Revealing Dreamscapes – Part 3
Today’s blog post concludes the intuitively guided series of connected dreamscapes that felt important to share, as they are layered with coded messages beyond what I’m even reflecting in interpretation. I’ve been sharing them after having integration time and letting them process behind the scenes, so in fact today’s dream is actually one I had on the night of Tuesday 2/2/21 of last week. You can read or revisit Part 1 and Part 2 at the links provided.
This dream is a little bit different and also connects my most recent sacred tattoo design project I’ve been working on, as you’ll see – I love how everything is always interconnected and aligned in timing.
On 2/2 the dream took me through a sequence of really big magick happening. I can’t even begin to describe what all was unfolding, but it was layered and all-encompassing, spanning across the Earth collective, but in a multi-dimensional way. I remember looking down in my hands and seeing a book in them that I received from an unknown/anonymous or unseen source. All I saw on the cover was, “Part 1,” in large lettering. I saw that there were two other books that had been given to two other people and theirs read, “Part 2 and Part 3” in the same big lettering. I remember knowing one of the people who had the second book – a student of mine – and the third was someone more distantly connected, but connected nonetheless.
Telepathically I was given the message that the books contained alchemical instructions for collective change, woven into story form. We each had been given the books because they were part of our path to help decipher, invoke as embodiment, and share/spread.
Then big animals appeared – again like in Part 1 – but this time singularly and slowly. The first I remember seeing more clearly was some kind of giant, ancient bird-like creature. I said an inward message on a telepathic level to whom ever was making them appear that was something like, “These others are not enough (referring to the animals being sent my way). If you want more from me you’ll need to bring on more.” Then that bird-like creature mutated into a huge dragon with an energetic force like nothing else. I had no fear. I was ready for something I felt was coming next.
The dragon infused me with its energy. I’m not sure if it blew it into me through its etheric, fiery breath or if it just transferred it through the strength of its emanation, but it was so massive in strength that I was pushed back a few steps by the thrust of its power. And as I stepped back, keeping solid balance without falling over, my legs sunk into the Earth with their touch and where I stood, a deep hole was created beneath me by the energy I now had within and that made me heavier and larger energetically than my small frame would otherwise seem to embody. The dirt felt very cool and soft – almost light like flour. The hole created by the energy impact was like one a dragon or dinosaur might be able to create with thrusts of their weight and power. So, it was as if the dragon and I had become one.
The dragon then told me that it was time to use all of my powers to support the collective. I was to activate all of my inner parts and then transfer them to others so we could create change – create the next Earth experience.
An ivory tipped wand appeared in my hand, which looked exactly like the one I have and was holding in some of the photos from my Winter Solstice Visual Spell to Activate the Light Within blog. I was then waving the wand and pointing it at person after person, transferring and activating within them, the same within that was awakened from the activation transferred to me.
And the dream ended, or that’s all I remember.
Of course the giant and prehistoric animal theme carrying both primal and primordial energy continues to weave through with the ancient bird-like creature and the dragon. And although there is some personal messaging in this and the other dreams, there is still the collective symbolism shining through.
Simplistically, the three part books spoke to the three part blogs, but in more complexity they feel to foretell that there may be three parts or processes collectively to go through, as the Earth evolves into this new paradigm. They also feel like different groups of souls that will be involved in each layer, in their own time, or coming of age based on the gifts they carry. Each person given a book felt to represent each of these soul groups energetically, so they were simply coming through an individual as a symbol of that energy. The three parts also felt like a personal message layered in there that has to do with my individual path and work to be shared, as its own piece.
The multi-dimensional big magick happening at the beginning feels like the alchemical process we’re involved in that will continue to expand and reveal itself.
I really loved the part where I said, “If you want more from me, you’ll need to bring on more,” referencing that what was being given so far although impressive, simply wasn’t enough. This spoke not just to my own courage and readiness for the bigger stuff, but as a representative of one of the groups, or collective at large since in fact these feel like collective dream messages, that we are all saying on some level that we’re ready for much more. “Give me all you got.” 😉
Enter the powerful dragon.
The dragon infusing me with its energy felt once again to be a DNA activation, much like the T-Rex of Part 1 had done through my crown chakra.
The hole beneath me felt like a deepening and grounding into greater embodiment and while larger in energy, the dirt remained soft and fluffy…So, in fact the core, root, and underground layers we’re peeling away are not as dense and sticky moist as we thought, but instead are easier to move through and lighter than we would have imagined, once we penetrate the outer layers protecting the soft, vulnerable core.
Things only seem hard, impossible, or slow, but in fact once we embrace our authentic powers, then the process can be lighter than we imagined.
The hole in the Earth felt like a transformation to the surface of things, morphing into a new terrain of experience that runs deeper than meets the eye.
The two of us becoming one – dragon and me – is a transmutational merging of energies, as well as the difference between a dragon slayer and dragon master.
The dragon slayer sees herself/himself to be separate from the dragon and that all it stands for in its primordial ways is something to fight, conquer, or destroy. These are the enemy. So the two will always be separate and one will always lose or win in a vicious, repetitive circle.
The dragon master sees no difference between the dragon and herself/himself and all that it stands for is a part of both of them. Therefore there is no enemy. Nothing to fight, conquer, or destroy. Only something to embrace, love, and understand for its value. So there are no longer two – only One. And they merge more powerful than either ever was on their own.
So my facing the dragon without fear and taking in its fiery energy transference, spoke to that transmutation into wholeness of power. Again, feeling much more collective than simply something I was individually going through and yet creating a trickle effect by doing so, myself.
The dragon saying it was time to use all of my powers and inner parts and transfer them to others spoke to me how we keep being told that the time is now. That what we’ve been waiting for and whom we’ve been waiting for is here now…is us. And there’s no greater time than to bring forth all that you are, shine your light, and by doing so will be supporting others to do the same. Transfer the power to one another through your individual gifts. Share the nuggets of awareness, spread the love, speak the language as only you can, through your specific frequency. Realize that every bravely kind encounter activates something within each other. This change from the inside will create the change on the outside.
The wand was an activation of awakening to everyone encountered. It speaks to being a conduit for love and awakening thread to thread of the tapestry, each in their own way. Some perhaps more visual and outwardly active, and others behind the scenes or quietly active. It also seemed to reiterate or confirm the guidance I received in sharing that Visual Spell blog to help activate the light within. Although this dream came after that, there is no time in the dream world and one might even say that this dragon dream experience was before that one and what I did through that Winter Solstice blog was a result of the activation transfer and message received “later.”
I find the primal or primordial energy thread in these dreams to be an alchemical key to our collective unfolding. And they are showing up in waking life as well. There have been other smaller confirmations of dinosaurs, dragons, and ancient winged creatures, but far too many to document all, so I focus on the main ones that speak louder. As I shared about the T-Rex statue and Dinosaur Museum sign confirmations in Part 1, the primal energy of Boojum our male cat in Part 2, and for Part 3 the waking life confirmations of these came through my recent sacred tattoo design project, as well as a close encounter in the forest.
The former being another first for some “Spiritual Skin” creations.
Synchronously, I’ve been working on a pair of sacred dragon tattoo designs for a mother and daughter. Each to have their own dragon and energy, but connected via some of the elements woven into the designs. The daughter is a Fire Dragon and the mother is a Water Dragon in Chinese Astrology. We added their birth or chosen flowers, symbols and Runes for their elements, the Moon and Sun/Fire Ball, and some connective Runes for both of them along with a touch of Cosmic Starry essence. (I might share more photos/info in another blog post upcoming.)
One is a Water Dragon Fae Queen and one is a Fire Dragon Empress.
This project was commissioned long before the dream and the timing of their creation was in order of completing the ones before them. This placed the dragons at the time, and integration after, of the dream. Fire and Water feeling especially potent to the alchemy of merging these powerful elements. Every time I work on a design it not only feels important for the person it is created for, but always carries collective support as a portal of activation on all fronts through that individual’s activation.
Much like the message of the dream to share the power with others that we activate within ourselves.
Then there was the close encounter, which took place this past weekend. We went snow shoeing after and during snow storms where we are in very fresh, deep snow. We have a huge forest and mountainous area right behind the place we’re staying, much like at home where we can hike or snow shoe out the back door.
We took some photos along the day’s adventure, which included this one:
It felt like a deliberate, perfect structure and the energy was strange. I was wondering in the back of my mind of what creature might have made it and often joke with Dave about Sasquatch on our hikes. We found some odd tracks that led to this structure that were not human. We thought perhaps a large animal had made its way through the very deep snow by what they appeared like…maybe a moose. It was a very quiet day and we could hear the trees creaking in the wind and no one else out, unlike the last weekend where we had come across several people. I had a strange feeling, but couldn’t put my finger on it.
Then I posted the photo, not thinking more of it, and a magickal friend of mine in Ireland relayed that it was an actual Big Foot/Sasquatch structure and that according to “experts” the cross marks the perimeter end of their territory. I used to watch many of the sightings programs back in the day, but had forgotten much of these kinds of details. Then two more confirmations of the same information came in from separate sources. It confirmed the feeling I had and while many might not believe in these beings or think they belong in the mythical creatures category of fireside storytelling, there are those of us who feel otherwise being that we live in a multi-dimensional world where portals, different timelines, and otherworlds merge. These make anything possible.
Regardless of fact or fiction, the connection that was brought to awareness of a primitive and primal creature with ancient or prehistoric connections, still held the theme of these dreams.
Now the energies and encounters were crossing dream into waking life and the merging of hidden into the light continues.
Interestingly, a few days after the dragon activation dream, I had a wedding dream. The dream was my own wedding happening all over in a different way, but again what’s mine is yours, so to speak. 🙂 It was being orchestrated on some other level from behind the scenes (much like I felt ours on Summer Solstice was) and being taken care of and put together without my having any part in it, but showing up. It was taking place in an expansive space with many people and an other-dimensional feel to it. I remember thinking this is odd, I’m already married, already had the wedding, but it was happening on a different plane of existence parallel to the other.
This isn’t Part 4, but a new beginning from all of this – a merging of parts, like the marriage of yin and yang partners, a symphony of new and primal/primordial notes, the partnering of elemental dragons within a family, and dream and waking life as one.
I believe we will continue to experience more cross-overs the more we create bridges through the portals of our hearts. Then we’ll realize separation is a choice and not a given.
Please take or leave what you choose from any of this. I share as I’m guided. I’m just being my part.
As promised, today’s Ask Astrid blog is the sequel to Wednesday’s Part 1 that shared the same title. It involves a precognitive dream I had about Astrid a few days after the collective dream involving the wild and prehistoric animals I chronicled in that post. I didn’t realize at first that the same theme ran through it until days later, as I continued interpreting and integrating the message. There were of course personal energies involved, but they reflected the bigger picture moving through me, and as a result, also moving through Astrid since she and I always go through similar things even if in different ways.
I often have some of my clearest and most telepathic or precognitive dreams come through my rabbit companions – on and off Earth – as well as my Russian tortoise, Gaia. I remember one many years back where Nestor let me listen through her ear and I journeyed through it to where my parents lived (far away from me at the time) and heard an exact conversation they were having, which I relayed to them and got confirmed the next day. It was her way of showing me that the telepathic lines were open to receive clear messages through our connection and through telepathy itself.
From then on, the telepathic channels between me and my beloved soul companions who once did, or currently do, inhabit animal bodies have been opened and I receive powerful messages to assist the shift of times through my personal experience of it.
That kind of profound dream experience has happened with Nestor, Joy, Cosmo, Gaia, and of course, now, Astrid.
But this dream I had last week was a psychic one, and what unfolded in waking life ended up having the connection to the theme from the previous one. I didn’t know until a couple of days later that it would turn out to be precognitive, but it did indeed foresee what was going to happen to Astrid and its immediate effects on both of us.
In the dream I saw Astrid after some kind of incident/accident had taken place. I didn’t know what the particulars were of how, but the result was finding her with the tip of one of her paws cut off. I remember feeling horrified about it and although it was cut off, I didn’t see evidence of blood, but could see inside as if it were hollowed out from where it came off. I looked around for a towel to wrap it in and remember having difficulty trying to figure out what vet to take her to for like an hour, as I was stressing over my sweet girl’s condition. That’s all I remember.
I woke the next morning feeling bothered by it and relayed the dream to Dave, as I usually do when I have very clear and detailed or odd ones. He told me it was just a random dream, as his way to assure me.
Well, a couple of days later, I’m woken in the middle of the night by noise downstairs. My intuition and mom instincts know immediately that it’s Astrid dashing around the living room like crazy, as a result of being spooked by our male cat, Boojum. I get out of bed because I can hear her continue freaking out and running about, and start to head down the stairs when in the dimly lit corridor I see her shadow sprinting up the stairs and the sound of her nails on the wood clambering and sliding about from her speed. She’s in flight mode and when she gets scared like that it’s hard to center and calm her for a while. The only thing she knows – that any rabbit or prey knows – is to run like heck and escape at all means. When she sees me she doubles back down the stairs leaping several steps at once and appearing to take a sliding side tumble (or at least that’s what I could make out in the shadowy dark), not expecting me to show up, and then turns back around and passes me, while heading under the bed upstairs to hide.
All I remember is being horrified by the sound and sight – just like in my dream – as I’m just thinking about her injuring herself while running blindly.
I continue down the stairs just to see if my instincts had been right and there was Boojum, sheepishly sitting upright in front of the opening to her pen, as if to say, “What? I didn’t do anything.”
I knew that he’d entered her area in the middle of the night to steal some hay or water while she was peacefully just laying there in her meditative/off-planet mode, as she does, and when she realized he was there it was too late. It felt like a stealth attack and her prey instincts put her in flight mode, feeling like she was threatened by this sneaky predator moving in the shadows nearby.
I immediately ran back upstairs to check on her and found her huddled under my side of the bed, scared. I talked to her calmly and was worried, wondering if she was alright.
I went to the center of the room in front of the bed and laid down to wait for her to come out and she did. That’s when I noticed her lifting her front right paw up now and then, as if it was tender to put weight on it. And then she stopped to sit and lick at it and groom her face and the paw. This was on and off now and then. So of course I panicked, thinking she may have broken, fractured, or sprang her paw.
I was a mom mess at 2 am.
Like I’ve done in the past with my babies, I decided to lay there on the floor with her all night if necessary. I remember once spending the entire night, awake, under the bed with Nestor when she was sick, in order to see her through the night.
So I grabbed my pillow and wrapped a towel over me (all I could find quickly) and laid by her side in the dark while administering Reiki and calling forth all of my healing energies and help. I did this for about two hours and she stayed next to me laying mostly still and only moving a few times in different positions. When she did move she was still lifting or licking her paw, but grateful for my presence, the energy, and my talking her through the fear to a place of centered calmness again. You can be assured I gave my all for love.
She nosed me a few times and after the last time she did so, she then made her way back down stairs, saying, “Thank you and I’ll be alright now.”
I felt her telling me she wanted me to get some rest, so I made my way back to bed, falling asleep while sending her more healing energy and praying for the highest good to unfold the next morning. I only slept a couple of hours.
I woke and checked on her immediately and she was doing her normal routines, eating, drinking, pooping – all signs we rabbit parents look for because they are crucial to their well being. But on rare occasion I still saw her pick her paw up slightly or lick it. Not often, but even if once, it’s enough to warrant worry.
I couldn’t see anything and there wasn’t any blood anywhere. I didn’t want to poke and prod too much in case of anything being broken. So, I felt that taking her to a vet was the better option than my digging around. The challenge being that the next day we had to leave to travel to our new location, it was a Friday, and we were in a small mountain town.
I searched online and found a local vet, five minutes away, but didn’t see anything about them treating rabbits or exotics. I looked up where we were going next and DID find a vet that treated rabbits there and had great reviews about their rabbit knowledge and care.
While I wrestled with what was in her best interests – waiting to get her to a rabbit vet, or taking her in immediately to a vet that didn’t treat rabbits, I went upstairs to get ready in case I needed to leave right away while I asked for a sign and the highest good to be clear.
As I made my way to the second floor, my eyes were directed to something tiny on the corner of the stairs. I bent to pick it up and discovered the puzzle piece needed.
It was Astrid’s nail – the whole thing! I know her nails because she has dark blackish-brown ones and they are very thick. So now I knew that she had lost a full nail in her frantic clambering on the stairs in the middle of the night. Oddly, there was no blood on it, her paw, or the carpets or stairs, and the end where it came off was hollowed.
So far, all of this mirrored my dream – the tip of her foot cut off (in fact turned out to be her nail), the hollowed out area where it came off was how the nail appeared, as well as no signs of blood. The towel I looked for in the dream to wrap her in seemed to end up being the towel I wrapped myself in for the two hours I laid with her and yes, I did spend time trying to figure out which vet was best, as I weighed all the options and played out the scenarios and how they would affect Astrid in the long run – just like how in the dream I stressed for an hour about the same.
Finding the full nail with hollowed end posed the concern that I might not be able to see the site of where the nail came off and it could get infected, and that with this kind of pressure to rip it off, perhaps she might have a broken toe or some other kind of damage.
I decided to call both vets. First the rabbit vet where we were headed to get their thoughts. They agreed that if I could get her in right away it would be better, to avoid potential infection. Problem was we’d be traveling Saturday, so couldn’t get her in that day and both vets were closed on Sunday, so Monday was only available at the new place. But to me, that was just too long to wait and wonder, or have things potentially go wrong. Still, I made an appointment there just in case, as they had barely any spots open, while I continued to assess the situation.
I then called the local vet to ask if they saw rabbits, see what they thought, and to relay the incident, as to me it felt like something that could be assessed even if not expert with rabbits being that dogs and cats can also lose nails.
To my luck, the technician that answered was very sympathetic to the situation, has had many rabbits of her own, knows how to handle them, and knows quite a bit about them. She asked the doctor if she’d see Astrid even though it’s not her specialty and the doctor was more than accommodating. She relayed that if any extra advice or meds were needed that the doctor would confer with rabbit vets she knew in other areas. They were completely full that day, but said if I could drop her off in the next half hour after their scheduled surgery that morning, they would fit her in in between the appointments that day and watch her for us in the meantime.
So, I took her right away. I was sad to have to leave her for a few hours, especially since we were traveling the next day, which meant she’d have to be in her traveling case two days in a row. I also didn’t like leaving her with an injury by herself, but with the pandemic, curbside drop-offs and pick-ups are the only way anyway.
Of course I spent those long hours away from her thinking of her, telepathically talking to her, and sending energy while I calmed myself down in the solitude of the mountain on a ski run all by myself awaiting the doctor’s call.
And I got the best possible news. The doctor called and confirmed that she had torn off the nail, but there was no redness, no blood, no swelling, or any signs of inflammation or tear to the skin surrounding it. Although it was a relatively new injury, it all looked fine. The soft inner part of the nail stub was still there (why I saw the hollowed out bottom portion of the nail) and she said that’s why her paw is sensitive. She said it’s like if we cut our nails too short and that sensitivity we’d experience. So if she happens to touch it a certain way, this is why she will pick it up or lick it, as it’s tender. But the good thing is, it is not a weight bearing toe that she lost it from. So this is why there’s only occasional tenderness experienced.
And, she examined the foot and toe and felt no breaks in the bone so didn’t feel it necessary to x-ray her. Even if her toe had been fractured, it simply would have to heal on its own, as there’s little they can do and she said that rabbits heal pretty quickly in this regard. That actually was the case for the human/part rabbit me 😉 as I’ve broken my toe and both feet in recent years and there was no setting involved – just natural healing time to mend.
The doctor noted the same as I did that Astrid didn’t seem to be in any major pain except for the random tenderness, which had already decreased since the time of first impact. We both agreed that meds didn’t feel like the right option since she continues with all of her normal behaviors, is moving around normally, and there’s no sign of infection beginning. Meds can mess with their digestive systems and eating behaviors. So, I was told to keep an eye on her and if any behaviors change or I notice infection beginning, her not able to stand on the paw, or bad odor from the paw (sign of infection), to bring her in immediately. The nail will eventually grow back and once it starts in a few weeks, it will grow strong around the inner soft part and she’ll be good as new. This vet said they actually weren’t going to be open this weekend at all, but told me to call her and she’d come in just for her, which was very sweet. Or, I could take her to the rabbit vet in our new location.
I went to pick her up and she was so happy to see me and go back home. She continued on with normal behaviors and I hardly saw her pick her paw up, if at all, and the next morning we were on the road with Astrid on my lap in her carrier doing amazing as she always does.
We arrived at our new place where we won’t be leaving again for four weeks, so it’s the perfect settled time to allow her nail to heal, while there’s a good rabbit vet close by if needed, and for both she and I to integrate all of the energy themes streaming through.
And it didn’t take her long to get comfy in her new surroundings. I was grateful to find there to be no stairs in the new place, wall-to-wall carpeting so it would be soft on her paws, and a cozy compact home for the family to be all close together. Since getting here I haven’t actually seen her lift or lick her paw like she was anymore and she’s continued with all normal behaviors. In fact, she’s zoomed around with exuberance, binkied, and flopped harder than I’ve ever seen her flop (even Dave remarked he’d never seen her do this) – all signs of one happy, healthy, secure bunny. And she’s continued to have a fully open pen 100% of the time with mutual trust between us.
She’s even found her new throne.
Don’t you just love all the cute, eclectic western boots surrounding her and the bears, moose, and fish on the ottoman guarding her that connect with the animal messenger theme of Part 1 and with how I keep mentioning the recurring appearance of bears in my dreams, the sighting of the moose a few weeks ago, and my being a Pisces (the fish, who inhabit the watery emotional depths of the sub and unconscious).
The boots feel to reflect the spirit of independence, confidence, endurance, the American dream, traditional values, and visions of the old South West. They also speak to New Frontiers and having a dream you’re not afraid to go after. And while they were the beginning of freedoms for some, they also stomped on the freedoms of others.
Astrid LOVES this chair so much and will sit in it while we watch movies at night, lay in it sometimes awaiting us to come home from our outdoor time, and sits in it at night while we sleep. How do I know that? Because I can see both the chair and her pen space from where I sleep at night and can see her shadow and silhouette of her ears peacefully sitting on her throne listening to the silence of the night darkness.
It’s a great vantage point for her to stay centered and aware of all that is around her. Perhaps assisting her to be more present and conscious with expecting the unexpected.
It’s been a huge relief to see her bounce back immediately and on her way to healing. It’s also been so beautiful to see her pick right back up and build upon all of her enhanced connective, joyous, and expansive behaviors she’s evolved into on this journey. The cats have even been hanging out with her more. We’ve witnessed more nose-to-nose encounters with Boojum and Sweet Pea hanging out with her under the bed.
And as for the tie-in with Part 1, indeed there is the connection to releasing primal patterns that came through the actual experience itself that Astrid went through.
She had a moment of vulnerability, like I did the day I could feel the streaming through of collective anxiety, and then got overwhelmed by the oncoming primal energy that Boojum in his predator and very raw, primal behaviors embody. He’s not a super spiritually focused soul, but instead has come into this life to be more base and core focused in his experience of life – to feel the sensual aspects of physicality, luxuriating in ego-based immediate needs, and being instinctual and survival motivated. In this way, he reflects to me Astrid’s T-Rex.
Boojum didn’t mean to harm Astrid, but the primal energy he carries was a trigger to the core prey essence that is embedded within Astrid’s DNA, even if she IS conscious of more. And when we aren’t present and grounded (she is often integrating and journeying off-planet or in the in between realms), then things can knock you off balance very easily. They can take you by surprise and cause trigger reactions instead of having the ability to respond with more presence when you are embodied and centered.
The wild and prehistoric animal dream in Part 1 spoke to the clearing initiation for big change coming through the purging and releasing of old core energies. These collective pools of untamed, primitive and survival mode instincts have been unconscious for so long and are now surfacing in order to integrate them more consciously through compassionate embrace.
On some level Astrid called this experience up in order to move through more of these patterns and releases, just as I was working through them after the dream, and we all are worldwide.
As I mentioned, we also seem to help buffer the energy for others, the more we each can work through the energies, and I feel that Astrid did her own share of that buffering in taking on the old prey/predator, victim/perpetrator energies. On a soul and higher self level, she wasn’t afraid to face this fear – one of the greatest she would have as a prey animal. And played out this triggering experience in order to move through it, just as I have been facing the fears of the mountains through skiing every day these past weeks so I can integrate the core patterns more of these unknown terrains and these vulnerable spaces.
And rather than have something really horrible happen, it was only her nail – the tip of the foot that represents Pisces, watery, unconscious energies (like the ocean the animals ran to in my previous dream) that broke off. But it was not a vicious or horrible injury. It was one that evoked tenderness, both in helping to remember the value of the incident and the energies through physical tenderness, and to represent the bridge to wholeness and healing – through a tender heart and more compassion and kindness.
This was demonstrated by how she’s held no ill feelings toward Boojum or either cat, when she could very well have gone into defensive mode with charging and grunting and running them off when they come around. She could also have allowed the old triggers to consume her and put her in fear mode, but neither happened.
Instead, I’ve seen her AND the cats both engaging one another more since we arrived to our new place and without animosity or fear. They have been sitting closer, edging into each other’s spaces, seeking to be with one another, and Astrid has even allowed Boojum to sit at the back of her throne above and behind her while she sits in it, with both of them at peace. There’s even been a lot of super cute engagement on Astrid’s part where we witness her literally hopping in front of Boojum back and forth, asking him to play with her.
Just as I wrote in Part 1, “the interaction confirmed for me that these energies only hurt us if we try to run from them, dismiss, fight, or even deny them. There’s a sense of their wanting acknowledgment and understanding of their place within the framework.”
Although Astrid was thrown into a core reactive place of panicked fear when Boojum startled her, it was evident after the two hours I laid with her doing energy work for the highest good that night, that she had moved through things and integrated it with my support.
We are both deepening into being bridges of compassion for the collective purging, as best we each can. And while the DNA redesign that we’re all experiencing is hugely transformative, it feels like it can be integrated with greater ease than one might think. It asks of us to be open to the possibilities, to expect the unexpected, surrender to tenderness, and to trust that things are in divine alignment for the highest good of all concerned.
So, Part 2 was about a revealing, precognitive dreamscape that prepared me for the unraveling of Astrid’s literal experience to release primal patterns. On some level, the dream helped me to process things on the subconscious levels so that I could be more present for her.
Yet, at the same time, it was a shared experience of releasing primal patterns, as I feel everything Astrid does as if it’s my own, and so we went through it all together. I got to have my triggered reactions to it all, breathe my way back to centering and empowerment, and together we harnessed love to walk us through it. Not to mention, I was able to look at my own old patterns of judgment or fear around these energies through those raw emotions that took place at 2 am in the full darkness of the night.
But when brought to light in the dawn of the day, the shadowy figures, horrifying sounds and sights, and raw fears all softened to reveal the heart’s resiliency through compassion and willingness to understand each part for what it is.
Of course there is so much more I could express about all of the symbolism that took place through this experience, but you may be able to uncover those pearls for yourself.
I actually thought that this would be the conclusion to this theme desiring to be channeled through, but in fact on 2/2/21, three nights ago, I had another dream that wants to be shared and within that dream I was specifically shown three parts. So, I guess there’ll be one more.
After having a little over a week to integrate one of my recent dreams and adding to it a second precognitive one, I continue to see how the animal world shows up in ways that help to understand messages and energetic landscapes we’re navigating. I’ve mentioned before how I feel animals and nature being messengers to help bridge the changes we are going through – bringing more grounding to the new visionary and spiritual ideas we are trying to manifest.
For me, I have always had very powerful dreams and experiences come through souls in the animal kingdom since I was a little girl. I remember recurring childhood dreams I used to have over and over about a giant blue whale, a horse that aided the little girl me through challenges, and ongoing animal messengers ever since. Many of these dreams have included precognitive and telepathic messages that I shouldn’t have known otherwise. These also happen without animals being involved, but more so with them. I often relay my dreams with people who are involved and surprisingly receive confirmations of details – sometimes exact conversations – dreamtime makes me privy to. They’ve also come through extraterrestrial dream experience sequences, but these are translating into more Earthly origins now – I believe in order to help drop into embodiment more and integrate spirit and flesh.
The first dream I mentioned having, felt collectively symbolic. It involved a very large herd of giant, wild, exotic, and prehistoric animals and dinosaurs all running from the trees on land, across the sand, and into a large water source – perhaps the ocean. They were not fleeing, nor had fear…they were simply running with focus into plain view on a very long, open stretch of sand. I remember having a similar dream before in the past, but this current one involved dinosaurs. In the dream I was not far from the stream of animals charging the water in harmony together (predator and prey alike) – a few yards at most, but was safely out of their way observing the scene. There was no danger imminent for me and I didn’t have any sense of fear. I stood there curiously watching the incredible vision of animals from across the globe and time – giant elephants, giraffes, other exotics, and then mixed amongst them were dinosaurs – many Brontosaurus and T-Rex in particular.
When I saw a bunch of T-Rex I felt to take precaution by finding protection under cover of what seemed similar to an over-turned, old military jeep – not from any real threat or fear, but from the unknown of their very primal energy. I laid low under it with a few other people that were now with me, creating a boundary between us. One T-Rex broke away from the very focused group heading to the ocean, and came over just like my instincts felt might happen.
He sniffed at the overturned jeep, finding the top of my head near an open part of the vehicle – not large enough to get at it, but enough to be able to smell and touch it. He sniffed at my head and then began to lick it, but didn’t do anything else even though he easily could have overturned the vehicle. I could hear him telepathically saying he was only teasing and not going to hurt me. Eventually he went on his way and I came out from under the vehicle to continue watching the animals soar by.
When I awoke I immediately felt these wild animals and dinosaurs reflected very old and primal collective core patterns, energies, and fears all moving through as part of the clearing initiation for big changes to come. Just like fossils, we continue to dig up these untamed aspects of self buried within the collective shared pool, primitive energies and desires, and deep survival instincts that have been running unconsciously. And this is what we continue to experience out in the world as a reflection of a huge purge of truths no longer desiring to be hidden.
Their running from the land to the ocean (collective energy water source) feels both like a cleansing or baptism of sorts, but also a movement from focusing only on the surface of things to acknowledging the emotional undercurrents that have long been running the show. The way to change is by having all of our parts revealed, acknowledged, embraced, and integrated. So this movement to water energy (deep core emotional and subconscious patterning), which has always felt like the missing key to building new foundations, felt like a good reveal in the dream. Unearthing the roots of things and not being afraid to face the feelings that have been hidden with them.
T-Rex prominence felt the most primal and ferocious of them all, showing me that we have yet more to see of this purge in energies across the globe and that the deepest and most raw things are finally being let free. However, the interaction confirmed for me that these energies only hurt us if we try to run from them, dismiss, fight, or even deny them. There’s a sense of their wanting acknowledgment and understanding of their place within the framework.
There was also a sense of a very deep crown chakra activation and DNA redesign that came through T-Rex with the sniffs and licks – much like my rabbits do when they channel Reiki through their noses and tongues. It is my sense that a literal physical mutation is taking place even though we may not see it yet. I believe we are and will continue to experience more accessibility to the light codes within our origins, as these temporal layers peel back and merge with the filaments of love.
Challenges give rise to who we really are and what is possible.
A huge frequency change is taking place, restructuring things from the core.
At least this is the message I received in interpretation. Everyone may interpret things differently and indeed there is more that is beyond words to describe.
The very next morning after the dream, while traveling to our new destination that week, I saw what felt like confirmation. We were journeying along the highway in remote, snow covered areas and I “randomly” saw a T-Rex skeleton statue on the corner of a street, in the middle of no where. It looked like the fossil statues you see in museums, but made of metal standing in the snowy mountain terrain. It was so out of place and yet it aligned with the message I received. That’s why it was meant to get my attention.
And if that wasn’t enough, right when we crossed the border into Colorado I saw a sign for Rabbit Valley while I held Astrid on my lap in her travel case (my soul companions in rabbit bodies that have returned to the Cosmos always send supportive messages and winks to me) and directly after it, a sign for “Dinosaur Museum” – again “randomly” out in the middle of no where.
Every time I would have a thought, come to some conclusion, or formulate an intent or understanding, the exact word, words, and visions would appear or be uttered within seconds of my having them – sometimes at the very same time. This of course is something that happens often for many of us – these synchronicities and instant manifestations – however it is increasing in frequency alignment and uncanniness, which speaks to me of multi-dimensional realities all merging.
Two days following that dream (on the six year adoption anniversary of my rabbit Cosmo who has departed) I woke with this out of the blue, heavy feeling of anxiety that stayed with me for hours until I skied these long luxurious runs in complete solitude at Telluride and later did a Reiki Healing Attunement. I checked in with myself to see where I might have any anxious feelings and determined that because of recent more vulnerable spaces I have reached, I in fact was feeling the collective. This spoke to the dream unearthing all of that old collective stuff and how I’ve recently felt like many of us are each buffering some of the energy, which likely is helping things not to ferociously explode more than it has for now. Evidence given by T-Rex and his actions with me in my dream.
And from the first full touchdown day in the new location after having the dream, until the last day before we left, there were daily visitations by so much wildlife. This included an unusual sighting, right before we got to our destination, of a couple hundred giant birds – what appeared to us as Great Blue Heron – in flocks feasting in fields along the road. We’ve never seen anything like it. I didn’t have my camera ready, so only caught a few of them at the tail end as you can see here. Our limited familiarity with the area pointed us to what we are familiar with seeing, but it appears these were most likely Greater Sandhill Cranes – the only species out of 15 types of cranes – that are found in this area.
These giant birds echo prehistoric flying reptiles of the past – and again felt like a tie-in with my dream seeing so many together in an odd display and having that ancient connection. They also speak to me of the Mystic, embodying so much stillness, serenity, grace, peace, and especially reflect solitude. Synchronously, the whole week following their appearance was a huge week of just that for me – solitude. And this helped to allow things to percolate and digest behind the scenes, while I was able to just “be.”
For some, that kind of alone time can be intimidating or isolating. For me, it’s deepening, connective, clarifying, and recharging.
I skied virtually on my own without hardly a soul, and most of the time no other souls, around me on these very long runs. One of them was 4.6 miles long and wandered through the winter wonderland that felt almost apocalyptic, as there was complete silence other than the soft swooshing of snow beneath my feet and not a person to be seen on the runs, nor in the village surrounding me.
It was like a journey in some far away deserted, faery tale land over and under bridges and softly flowing along in hours of silence.
And all of this supported that wave of collective energy I felt come over me at onset of the week and the continued theme of anxiety in a different form that came at the end of the week, which is part of the next dream.
It felt almost like the world didn’t exist other than my being able to feel the underlying energies very transparently last week. And interestingly, I was daily riding a lift named Sunshine Express, which complimented the lift you saw me share about previously named Moonbeam Express that I rode on the New Moon. In each case, riding the wave of a celestial new dawning.
The area of Telluride, Ridgway and Ouray we were in is truly majestic. I remember it from our RV days in the Magick Bus and some of the enchantment we experienced there including the rare encounter with a black shape shifting fox that seemed to be the doorway of big change on that trip.
The high altitudes always speak to my essence – the summit of Telluride is 13,150 and feels like home.
And speaking of home, we felt very welcomed in the area with all of the animal messengers of the week that showed up for us including two prairie dogs, many large marsh hawks, a bald eagle, seven herds of elk, four small flocks of wild turkey, and a sweet doe and fawn that we saw three days in a row in the very same place each time. The last time they were laying together, nearly nose to nose, under some brush.
Each animal carrying beautiful medicine for the journey and weaving a story of integrative transformation to help navigate the collective shift of energies that I was receiving through dream and waking life. They each showed up at aligned times that reflected just the perfect confirmation or support needed.
I wasn’t always camera-ready, but caught a few photos to share.
And on our first day out in the new area last week, while hiking in a soft snow storm, we were trying to find a trail along the river and ended up making our own for a bit. That’s when we stumbled upon Kuan Yin.
This Goddess or Mother of Compassion is very strongly connected to the animal kingdom and forces of nature and is known as “she who hears the cries of the world”.
Might her surprise appearance hidden out in the snow where no one else was wandering have also echoed my dream in messaging the need for each of us to call forth the depths of compassion for self and other during this shift we are sharing?
That this kind of heart opening is ever-more important while the world purges the painful past and old memories that have been locked away?
A way to be bridges for one another and to bridge the pain back to wholeness.
This leads me to my precognitive dream that involved Astrid, but came to be about so much more. I will share that in the upcoming Part 2, later this week.
Until then, I wish you all your own little “peace” of solitude in these deeply transformative times.
Happy February! This is my birthday month so it’s always clarifying for me of the themes ahead and today, Imbolc, is always a special day I remember each year because it was my twin soul’s birthday – you know her in her rabbit form as Nestor.
And with a new month rolls in new highlights for us to navigate the days ahead by. Lee comes to us once again with beautiful lighthouse nuggets.
You may be tired of hearing about it, but yes, self nurturing continues to be key. Lee stresses the utter importance of active, regular self care and how it simply isn’t a luxury. If you don’t put this into place, the shifts that are continuing to unfold collectively are going to continue to force you into a corner instead of you aligning with the upgrades more harmoniously. I’m seeing this with clients and students who are receiving the not so subtle nudges in this direction. Change can be made easier and quicker when we take action toward the messages coming our way.
Lee also touches on a lot of great energetics including how manifestation and creation energies are getting stronger by the day, chaos is serving a purpose where the rise of consciousness is concerned, and how we’re learning what true connection is through all of the challenge.
To say I adore my soul companion in rabbit body, Astrid, is an understatement and the depth of that love is far more than snuggly sweetness we share between us (although that definitely is a big part of it). It includes how much I admire and am inspired by her agile spirit, strong heart, and wise instincts. I also love her humor and childlike innocence she so exuberantly and unabashedly displays, while the next moment standing in the unwavering power of her benevolent queen’s essence. She is so in tune with her body and feelings, and together we are like a finely tuned piano of black and white keys working in harmony. But that is something that doesn’t just happen overnight. It comes with committed patience, open-hearted presence, and willingness to be open to seeing each other as equals.
I’ve written quite a bit about animal communication, the importance of communicating everything with them, how we can share harmonious relationships with our animal companions, and in fact how important it is to keep deepening into the vortex of your heart so that possibilities in this realm will become the new norm. One of these shares was about how Astrid and our niece opened the communication channels, which you can read here: Animals Understand
And it’s just such clear communication channels between the two of us that assist during times of change.
I’ve been so very proud of this sweet, strong soul who has been fully back to having 100% free roam during our travel time away. The first week was a trial run of part-time closure within her giant, mobile pen the size of two and a half pens put together only while we were out during the day for a few hours and sleeping at night. This was for potential safety and damage control in foreign new spaces.
But after having a check-in and long conversation with her where she expressed her frustrations to me, I knew it was time to leave the door permanently open and this has continued since – she’s on three weeks of open pen and full free roam at all times.
We agreed on trust guiding things and with the freedom she would know that I honored her word and soul needs, which in turn she would reciprocate. And we’ve both kept our word.
Astrid’s soul is SO big and advanced, to contain her in more than just her physical body alone is spirit crushing – both to her and me. So it’s been back to full freedom always and that makes a happy queen and mom. She still uses her pen for the majority of the day and everything in it as her safe space and personal realm.
She’s shifted from guarding it all quite diligently from cat spies and robbers to relaxing into a new ease, while coming and going as she desires.
It’s been super interesting to watch both her old and new behaviors emerge, which have evolved to suit her temporary home life and reflect her transformation process. So far I’ve witnessed her behaviors change based on triggers from having an enclosed space, the different homes we’ve been in, the layout and space of the home, how she feels in it, the way the cats are behaving, and how she’s embracing being the traveling rabbit for the period of time I’ve told her we’ll be gone.
She’s gone from frustrated to empowered and joyful – from unsure to secure and confident.
She went from also knocking down her cardboard cabin, chewing on her mats and pen (even when it was open), tipping over hay bins and snack bowls, and being afraid someone would steal her treats, to complete peace, her usual tidy ways like back at home, and sense of security even if the cats lurk around.
The more we communicate and the more I demonstrate my trust in her, stand behind my word of never ever leaving her side, and literally holding her hand throughout every new transition of every single moment, the more she relaxes into even greater embodied empowerment.
One of the entertaining (although equally frustrating to me) behaviors she displayed was in the first home of three weeks we were in, where she became much more territorial. This was her way of asserting the need to honor her feelings while she traversed through the changes she was going through and learning how to process the new. This made her charge at or chase any cat that infringed on her realm. She was even temporarily back to charging when you put food in front of her (an old shelter response) until assured with pets and snuggles.
I especially got a giggle out of her stealth attack on our male cat Boojum. She would lay low in her cardboard cabin calmly with her amethyst, and if Boojum tried to pass (he’s known to steal her hay and water) she lunged at him with full speed and grunt, sending him on his way. She would then immediately and quickly retract back inside. This fast stealth strike and equally fast retreat back into oblivion had us calling her a little moray eel. 😉
She would also lay directly across the front of her small hay bin that is the bounty both cats will sneakily try to get, and basically like Gandalf from Lord of the Rings declared, “You shall not pass!”
There was never any violence or fight that ensued. She just asserted her boundaries and I LOVE that about her.
The cats know to back off because Queen Astrid is quite a force to reckon with energetically. You wouldn’t think so looking at her sweet silver butterfly kissed lips and twinkle toes, but she’s learned to be comfortable in her power of both strength and softness. She’s the Rabbit Queen, afterall!
In our first place she had morning moments of binkies and running laps with me in the master bedroom, but mostly processed how to integrate the new with staying in the main living area with us and asking dad for lots of extra snuggle time while he did his stretches on the floor. I loved how she looked to both of us (mom AND dad energies) for encouragement and love, as ingredients to the new she was deciding how to integrate.
And this behavior continued on the first leg of our journey until we got to our second landing spot.
With four weeks and already three of the seven road trips under her wings, she came to a steady and more anchored place of softened confidence, encouraged by her parents. And it is in this last week where even more of her exuberant and explorative inner child also made many more appearances again. She’s had a blast exploring the entire home from the get-go and not one night did she spend contained in her pen. It was only put up to create the feeling of her having her very own, safe realm within the new space, but it was left wide open all day and night long.
It’s a very nice space where she has a beautiful winter scape view.
She’s actually evolved into being the happiest I’ve seen her, the most social ever with everyone – not just me, the most self-assured and content, and super communicative, responsive, and interactive. She literally fills the space of the room, but in a sweet way that evokes a smile and invites you to play.
She doesn’t feel the need to own the room, but shares it with everyone and really has taken her spot as a bridge for the whole family.
There’s times we’ll come downstairs to find her sitting tall on the center round ottoman like the benevolent queen who is excited for the fun to begin and to let down her hair.
And in the evenings when we watch movies, she’ll move between laying like a bunny loaf in front of us on that ottoman, joining dad in his stretching exercises, and then jumping on and in between us on the couch, laying there awaiting pets and enjoying snuggle time.
There’ll of course be a few hops, zoomies, and teases, as she invites everyone to add play to our peaceful evenings.
You can tell by the last several photos where her favorite spot is right in the middle of all of the action and smack center of the energy in the room. It’s so endearing to see her in her essence and element and even Dave has remarked how she’s really blossomed in this new space and surprised him with how not only well she’s doing, but how she’s let out her personality even more.
It has been so fun to watch her surrender into her childlike self as she runs, jumps, binkies, and leaps with joy. The more guarded, old parts of her have relaxed again back to how she is at home, but also in a newly empowered way.
She’s jumped on every surface possible – couches, ottomans, wide adobe window sills – and had no problem running up and down the wooden stairs to the second floor so that she could explore there and also come thump by my side of the bed to tell me she’s ready for morning and morning snacks to begin!
She would run upstairs in the evenings while I’m working and tug on the comforter or the velcro attachment of my computer cord to let me know it’s dinner time.
She’s even followed me around at my feet, excitedly been coming when ever we call her name, and has been craving dad’s attention too, enjoying her teasing games with him for snuggles and carrots.
And during the day she securely rested in her cardboard cabin or sprawled out on the mat in her pen, awaiting us to return home.
She’s been finding her balance and like the collective, is mirroring how to revisit the old patterned, painful memories of her past, but realize that the now is nothing like that. So while she’s had trigger reminders of being locked up, abandoned, and badly handled come up through the experience of major change on her traveling adventure, she’s been able to revisit it safely and quickly with our loving and nurturing help, so that she can move through and beyond those old behaviors at even greater depths of clearing.
She’s realizing, through our communications and demonstrations of honor and trust for who she is – being seen and fully supported – that the old doesn’t have to define her anymore. She’s learning that it’s okay to demonstrate vulnerable frustration and have feelings come up, but she’s also realizing that they are in fact only based on what “used to be” and what “is” is something entirely different.
She understands our trust in her and she trusts that we will always be here for her.
She’s being supported into her authentic self and loved every step of the way. We don’t judge her for her actions while she processes the feelings and needs she has to draw lines. We honor her need for alone time and give her plenty of nurturing when she needs encouragement.
And she’s understanding that boundaries are healthy, but can also be bridges of understanding rather than violent separations.
In the latest new home she hasn’t had to be territorial in the same stealth way. She’s softened into a more direct line of communication because of being more at home with her feelings. She simply stands her ground with solid and sweet confidence and I’ve now found her sitting not far apart from both of the cats at any given time. In fact, they’ll all be huddled in a triangle of sorts, leaving you wondering what’s being plotted amongst them.
She’s coming into a new sense of how it is to be both soft and strong when in embodied empowerment.
There’s a whole new programming she’s undergoing within this experience, much like me and how I’m reprogramming my relationship to the old fears surrounding height edges and skiing that has more profound effects on a wide range of things beyond what meets the eye.
Never are our experiences isolated to self alone.
We’re both learning how to move through and transmute these primal patterns so that a new experience can be possible.
And this in fact also reflects what I feel the collective is moving through and rebooting as well – something I’ll likely share a little more reflections about in an upcoming post.
Astrid wanted me to remind you that her Ask Astrid Fridays are also open to any of you who might have questions for her.
Do you have something you’d like to ask Astrid?
If so, please send them along either in the comments below, or through the contact form and we’ll try to get some of them up in future posts.
While they say the eyes are the windows to the soul, dreams can be glimpses of your soul’s calling. You might even say that imagination is the way in which you can hitch a ride on a soul dream and anchor a future window to help navigate your now by. Future windows provide a map for your soul to help guide you. And the more you dance with imagination, the more Spirit will reveal the nature of your being.
Winter feels like dropping into a deep dream where you can envision any potential under her snowy blanket, that no one but you is privy to. In this way, you needn’t feel self-conscious, as Winter merely keeps your secrets safe, but never judges. In this way, you can fly on wings of expansion, as creativity has no limits.
Winter is a beautiful opportunity to softly envision and incubate the dreams and nudges calling you. She creates an enchanted realm perfect for creative brainstorming and quiet reflection on plans that will have you leaping like bunnies come Spring.
There is something only you have to share with the world, so trying to be like others around you is a waste of time and energy. It will not only make you feel uncomfortable, but it will also diffuse your light.
You shine your brightest by bringing through your gifts, as only you can do.
Your dreams reveal your soulful heart and carry message whispers from Spirit about what only you are capable of expressing.
There’s a sweet little niche you came to fill.
There’s a sweet little niche we’ve been waiting for.
So listen to those dreams, nudges, and subtle voices and let this Winter help you root what you know is yours to blossom.
The first photo you see was taken from the window of our new landing spot in Colorado. When peering through the glass I felt a sweet serenity wash over me and a cozy intimacy of being with my vulnerable feelings and dreams in a way that was invited by the fresh snow-covered countryside. It was the crisp vision of our first morning when I woke on my own to feed Astrid and peered through the windows to see what Nature had created from the ongoing snow all night and morning. Fresh possibility invited me and I willingly dropped into that space. The dream felt more clear and tangible than it has in a while.
The last photo you see was taken through the window of our previous landing in Utah on the eve of a snow storm that lasted all day, night and into our departure morning. The landscape looked soft and dreamy, becoming the muse for this post. It felt like Winter’s lullaby inviting me to drift off into dreamland where so much richness takes place. It’s the same richness we can induce by drifting off into our imaginations and seeing where it takes us. The dream felt possible, more fun, and less intimidating.
Between the two bookending dream windows a soft gaze and nurturing quality becomes the road to clear and anchored potential.
If you haven’t already, perhaps the rest of Winter you can let her gently rock you into the season of dreams and see which ones light you up in ways that activate your soul.
If you don’t feel a responsibility to your dream for yourself, it can sometimes be easier to understand its importance by realizing how integral being you is to the collective. So then the responsibility might be to supporting the greater good into realizing and bringing through expressions of being by example.
You may also realize a sense of responsibility to the idea seed in your dream from Spirit and get out of your own way.
Deep Winter dreams can be the windows to your soul.
What dreams seem to keep knocking on your heart door?
Is there one in particular that feels like it won’t go away?
Is there one in particular that really lights you up when ever you imagine the possibilities?
Start there and let yourself go a little further, seeing where the dream would like to take you. There’s no harm in going on an imagination ride. You might just find that the exhilaration is something you don’t want to end.
You might just find that this Winter a new journey of being you has begun.
Days to me have felt suspended recently, like time outside of time, or as if a bubble of incubation hovers around things. We are all going through varying degrees of transformation, which is like an initiatory phase of accelerated being in motion. It feels like this acceleration is exposing so much of the dramatic experiences all around and within us that have created divide from the underlying layers of pain being exposed so rawly. Duality has been so deeply engrained that we’ve forgotten our true unified nature, and the inner conflict of reconciling these reveals being unleashed more and more is the culprit behind finger-pointing.
Change occurs with conscious responsibility and compassionate embrace. I believe that the more honesty we can incorporate into our reflections, the greater the potential for empowered experiences.
I can feel how fertile the energetic landscape is right now to support new beginnings. Our very DNA is undergoing profound activations streaming through at the cosmic levels and with all of the light codes permeating at these deep levels, we’re bound to experience profound, surprising, and yet interestingly familiar waves of energy available for manifesting at new levels we haven’t yet known in this lifetime.
It feels like the more we can move with the waves, rather than resist them, the easier change will be. You know how hard it is to swim upstream or to go against the ocean’s currents. The same holds true for life. And while it might feel like a personal badge of honor to say you succeeded in bucking the flow, it might also be counterproductive to your energy reserves and where that energy could better serve the greater good.
Old patterns are no longer going to be sustainable or endurable. The more rapid things shift, the more rapidly we will see the unsustainable and misaligned fall apart. This is part of transformation and the better we become at lovingly releasing attachments to rigid and limited ideas, the better equipped we’ll be to handle the rapid change and the quicker we’ll put into place creative new systems that support humanity’s inevitable evolution.
We’re being shown that more harmonious relationships are of utmost importance to nurture with all of existence – human, animal, plant, mineral, planetary, and cosmic. Through pain and suffering, we’ve been given opportunity to rise together, realize our potentials, and live with more profound consciousness and sensitive awareness.
I believe that the more we can deepen into our hearts, the more love can anchor across Earth. And if that is the only thing we each do, it will be more than enough.
And speaking of rapid changes and alignment, I do a lot of reflection while I’m in solitude up on the mountain and because of some things I was tuning into, I felt to share this to my Instagram page recently, which also feels supportive to today’s inspired blog share:
Beautiful expanses that nurture possibility remind me that ultra presence is part of being and truly being is alignment. This state of being is powerful for manifesting, but we are still able to manifest even if we aren’t yet feeling fully in the power of our being because the energetic field of experience is accelerated. This is also why what we manifest can end up feeling like a challenge because it asks us to rise with the new and that might mean some rapid changes are in order.
Since intentions are so powerful and manifesting is more instant, it is equally as important when asking for things, to be mindful of how you would also like to receive them and to understand that what the highest good is, may be different than what you’re attached to thinking it should be.
Perhaps adding, “with gentle grace please,” would be more supportive for your process rather than saying, “bring it!”
And realize that the essence of your desire is what’s key – not the end result.
Manifesting change comes through alignment and things conspire to create that alignment, which includes bringing you what matches that in essence or can get you there in wholeness.
I’m also feeling to throw in a reminder to each of you not to forget both the tools you have available and the power of simply sharing the art of being you through the vortex of your heart. These will help with creatively manifesting the new, aligning with the rapid changes, and walking through any challenges that arise along the way with greater ease and grace.
My Reiki students are quite familiar with hearing me remind them of not only using their gift of Reiki, but more specifically (for Reiki 3 students) not to forget those Reiki Healing Attunements you learned. I still can’t tell you how many people do forget all the tools they have in their empowerment pockets. When crises hit, it’s easy to get knocked off balance and feel confused or unclear. But if you can gently remind yourself that all the years you’ve spent learning things, all the experiences you’ve gone through, and all the classes or books you’ve taken or read are always at hand and within you, you can help to shift a moment of feeling disempowered to a moment of renewed strength, hope, and cocreative influence. Even if that’s simply a moment of greater presence and pause, that can be a game changer in shifting your perspective and diffusing a trigger.
Reiki Healing Attunements continue to be one of the most powerful tools I use and they really aren’t intimidating if you practice them a little each day/week. It will make a big difference once you become familiar with the process as a bridge to support any of your goals.
Remember to be creative with any tool you utilize, including your Reiki practice, and broaden beyond the fundamentals. Allow your intuition to guide you and the natural healer and light being within you to formulate new levels of activation that have even greater potential. Don’t be afraid to think outside the box and implement wider perspectives.
There’s no greater supported time to harness your gifts than now.
Remember also that with accelerated experience and instant manifestation potentials comes also the acceleration of your practices. You can achieve results from minutes of highly heart-engaged intention for the highest good. It doesn’t have to take long to be impactful.
Being is our power and we’re learning to make everything an instant state of being, which includes the way we move energy through us and harness tools or practices of any kind that we choose.
Another thing I felt to address in today’s post that feels interwoven with the themes channeling through so far, is a little inside look at the process of change, moving through fears, and embracing growth.
I’ll reference my personal experience I’ve been working on since the start of this year – facing and growing through my fears associated with skiing and being on steep edges. Again, I’m going to reshare a post I did on Instagram last week, as the message feels pertinent:
There is an ebb and flow to things that is natural. Sometimes it can feel like taking two steps back amidst your momentum, but these are just moments of pause to readjust, check in with your process, go deeper, celebrate your growth, and/or prepare you for the next leap. I experienced my most challenging day last week right after my funnest and most progressed day. The terrain and icy conditions, along with “accidentally” getting on an advanced track/run I shouldn’t have, put all my fears on the table at once.
We were trying to get me across a new mountain we were skiing to something better for me, but my higher self had a plan for this. I ended up on the weirdest track I’ve ever seen that was like the bottom half of a tunnel – similar to a birth canal – that was all icy from end to end, had moguls, was narrow body width, steep, and there was even an area where a tree had fallen down across the track with a tiny opening that had been cut in it to get through. Needless to say it was my worst nightmare, but I managed to hold it together, the Universe helped out of the blue with a manifestation that helped me at one point, I was able to consciously talk myself through it, and I got down safely with the experience of a definite shift having taken place.
In the past, this would have made me break down and cry and maybe even need serious help getting down after I likely would have froze from fear. But the experience, instead, became a chance for me to harness my process I have learned, which ended up keeping me safe and not falling, as well as able to stay focused and keep methodically present so that unconscious feelings were acknowledged, but not my guiding force.
I was able to cradle them with the loving strength of a father (productive Capricorn energies at work) and trust that I could support that part of me and inner child through. And I did.
And although the rest of the day continued in a similar fashion because of conditions and terrain, I managed to stick to it with slow encouragement and adjustments and took pause and stopped when I felt to.
By honoring and embracing these periods of change, I was able to make the most out of it and not push myself, but rather just work with what I had and not care about needing to have it be a certain way or like the day before. I embraced that different is okay and that some days these lows can actually prove to reflect my greatest growth.
I may not have looked the most graceful on the mountain, but my internal processing was one of loving grace toward self.
One might think that performing well would reflect that alone, but in fact how I embrace a challenge is to me something really worth celebrating.
It really isn’t always about transforming the experience into an idealized end result, but more about the growth you learn to implement as the new, natural, more empowered process along the way.
For me, I feel like the first two to three months of 2021 is about this integration growth process to help navigate brand new terrain with greater confidence and trust.
It’s also a winding down period in terms of completing projects and focuses from 2020, while also releasing all the old energies last year brought to the collective foreground.
And finally, it’s a time for listening so that I can continue to stay aligned with the accelerated energies at hand, flow with rapid changes, support the implementation of creative change by fine-tuning where inspiration is guiding me, and do it all through a more consciously empowered, heart-centered process.
Tomorrow finishes our time out at the first landing of our journey, as we will be heading to Colorado come Saturday morning. We’ve had a great time exploring the area here in and around Park City, Utah and are looking forward to our return to Colorado – we haven’t been there since our time in the Magick Bus on our rv adventures. It will undoubtedly bring back memories of Joy and Cosmo – my dear rabbit companions who were both with us when last we were there – and will come at synchronous timing since Monday will be the six year anniversary of when Cosmo first came home to join our family and become Joy’s bonded companion for the rest of her life. Colorado seemed to be one of the shifting points along our journey then, so I’m interested in seeing how things unfold.
It’s also in Colorado where I’ll be teaching the first new online class of 2021 – Intuition & Reiki ~ Empowered Intuitive Development. The class has been full, but I’ve been considering some ways I can shift how I’m doing things so that I could make some more spots available since people had been inquiring.
So, if you were one of the people interested, please let me know, as I’m feeling I could make it work to accommodate 1-2 more.
Info for this class, as well as March’s Crystal Healing & Reiki ~ Deepening through Integrative Healing Sessions, which still has some spots open, can be found here:
In the meantime, I’m continuing to wind down like I mentioned, and not taking on any other commissions, projects, or sessions – just completing what’s on hand currently so that Spring will be a time of renewed focus for me.
Do you have creative new ideas for 2021 that you intend to put into motion? Or, are you feeling like those inner callings you’ve had for some time now are finally ready to birth?
Wishing you your own new, natural, more empowered process of loving grace toward self, as you navigate the new into being.