The ever-wise Astrid joins us today for a share about wellness derived from a balance of varied experiences we invite into the dance of life with us. It’s also about how living from the source of love in your heart, opens doorways to accessing your multi-dimensionality. The result – greater feelings of wholeness and well-being.
It feels like we’re constantly receiving the same theme messages over and over, but the truth is there aren’t any really new messages or ideas – there’s simply different perspectives they come through or evoke and different, perhaps more aligned timing they speak to us.
Because of these, the present landscape feels seeded with greater potential for openings, as a vast majority of the collective continues to slow down and is faced with more contrasting experiences.
Briefly, I’m happy to report that Astrid continues doing extremely well, her toe injury from losing her full nail has been non-existent since we arrived to our location of the last nearly three weeks, and she increasingly exhibits a deepening of joyful exuberance and loving connection that have added both comic relief and socialization sweetness.
While being displaced from her normal routines and realm on this trip, as well as having more confined spaces at times, could very well have made Astrid retreat into herself, permanently revert to triggered patterns from her past, or even worse – weighed on her physical well-being – quite the opposite has taken place. I’ve already written about how she’s been opening up even more and working through core fears, but today we thought to share some sweet photos and fun little stories to accompany her transformation because after all, a picture speaks a thousand words.
The reason she feels it important to share this, is because rabbits can be an extreme example for the same things we go through because of their sensitivities.
Rather than pull back, feel depressed, or become ill, Astrid has welcomed more layers of living to be part of her experience no matter the circumstances. She exercises, plays, has conscious introspection time, rests, eats and hydrates regularly, communicates, and engages connection by choice. All of which help her to maintain wellness and support an increased level of personal evolution for her soul in rabbit body.
She’s especially become fond of yoga, stretching, and meditation time with dad during the wee hours of the morning or in the evenings by the fire while watching a movie.
When ever dad gets the yoga mat out, Astrid makes a beeline to him and plops herself down right next to him, runs around or lays on the mat on her own, stretches, or engages Boojum to invite him to play on the mat with her.
In the mornings she sits quietly with dad during meditation or gives and invites loving connection to show that she’s creating space for this healing practice and supporting him with something she enjoys too.
This is all especially endearing to see, as she used to only engage with me and now she’s truly opened to the whole family.
Then there’s super Astrid exercise time to express her exuberant joy of life and being in body. This consists of her leaping, twisting, and hopping in place (called binkies), or racing around like a flash of lightning until she’s fully released the wave of energy spontaneously moving through her. One morning she demonstrated her amazing strength and agility running laps in and out of tight corners, then raced from one end of the room and did a flying leap over the 1 1/2 foot high, 3 foot long ottoman, ending with zooming right under our female cat’s body between her back and front legs, as she was mid-walking. She had me in stitches!
And of course the multitude of ways she shows her desire to connect, communicate, engage, and love from a vulnerable space that include anything from jumping on the bed with a good morning nudge to laying next to us while we are working, relaxing, napping, or reading, or running over and nosing us with desire for snuggles and kisses.
She also engages the cats by sometimes touching noses with Boojum, or hopping at them and stopping a few inches in front of them, then hopping or circling away in hopes they’ll follow her lead. Sweet Pea and Astrid are often found a couple of feet away under a bed or table sharing space silently. The females seem to engage on an intellectual level and when Boojum’s introduced it, it’s usually only about fun. 😉
There’s times she chews her wood, pine cone and cardboard, times she takes down her cardboard house and moves it elsewhere, jumps into or onto things, sits on a chair demonstrating her bigness, times she lays with and licks her amethyst or stuffed friends, times she sits tall and still like a Buddha bunny, and times for the new hard flop into a tranced-out deep sleep. The hard flopping is different for her, but oh so good to see. When a bunny flops on her/his side it’s a sign of complete and utter vulnerable comfort and trusting surrender to feeling safe and loved. It took her a while to do this from when I first took her home and then she only softly would, but now there’s the full-on free-fall flop.
The more she engages on a variety of levels, the more possible avenues of joy she creates and the more she derives comfort in all the parts of herself and what being in body has gifted her opportunity to experience in this life. And the more she nurtures a more well-rounded approach, the greater her well-being.
I’ve found the same true for myself and people I know through friendships or work – the more we open to the variety of ways our souls have ability to express themselves because of being human, the more we create wellness by providing open channels for energy to do what it wants most to do – flow through. And even if we have a restriction in one way, as limitlessly creative beings we can find other ways to channel energy.
For instance, Astrid can’t speak like we do, but she has found many ways to express how she feels through other kinds of sounds like grunts, thumps, teeth chattering (their way of purring), or through bodily movements like giving a quick shake to her head and ears with excitement, leaping in the air, racing around with joy, nosing you to ask for something or exchange a love message, following you and laying close to share connection, sharing a rare lick to demonstrate affection, tugging at your pant leg or sock to get your attention, or jumping on the bed to welcome the morning.
But as we know, balancing our lives remains an important aspect to wellness. If we are too out-weighed in one thing of any kind, we can create underlying blocks that express as feelings of resentment, anger, blame, sadness, frustration, boredom, etc. without realizing that we are limiting our experience of life by limiting how we choose to focus all of our energy. This can also start to create tightness in our bodies or other kinds of physical discomforts or challenges simply as a reminder to move our energy in a variety of ways. And movement doesn’t just speak to physical movement, but also creating outlets to channel the different parts of ourselves and energies so they don’t become stagnant.
Astrid could easily create literal “blocks” or blockages in her sensitive digestive system if she doesn’t keep moving energy and sampling the possibilities that opening her heart to more can provide.
Rabbits demonstrate the natural energetic flow that is so vital in the way that they must always have their systems moving in order to thrive, or how they need to move in order to help push through blocks.
If she lets fear, for instance, take over energetically….she can literally become debilitated. If she doesn’t eat or exercise properly…she can experience physical shut down.
So, she’s chosen to surrender to life no matter her circumstances, and with my loving support and encouragement, continues to experience a wider range of possibilities that more authentically reflect her multi-dimensionality.
Our hearts are incredible portals to amazing things. They are the source of more than we have yet to understand and by living from these amazing portals they provide us access to a myriad of experiences that would otherwise be limited.
Astrid’s multi-dimensional experiences used to be only limited to her inner world where she traveled both as a means of escaping the pain of her circumstances before her and the only option she had given those confined circumstances.
But once love found a way to open her heart through our connection, she realized that she no longer had to protect it nor keep her parts separate…she could channel and integrate her ethereal experiences through the enjoyment of actually being in a body now also capable of sensual enjoyments only the physical can provide. And whether that be opening to the feelings she didn’t think were possible to experience, engaging in ways she was afraid to trust before, or allowing herself to surrender into the body she always preferred hovering outside of more than being in it, she discovered that multi-dimensionality meant being able to have well-rounded experiences on every plane of existence.
I’m convinced that Astrid wouldn’t have made it much longer if we hadn’t met. As strong as she was, eventually the separate life she lived, in not being able to express her soul fully through her body, would have created a full detachment at some point. She was a butterfly living inside a glass container. Now she’s able to stretch those wings and access more layers of experience.
And this is what she wants to express to each of us.
We all have potentials of expressions beyond however we feel limited in the moment. By the nature of our being multi-dimensional, we have a multitude of ways to bring through our energy and the more we surrender to possibilities, the more possibilities we create. The more we open our hearts, the more the doorways of multi-dimensionality find an access point to weave through greater experiences of fulfillment.
Astrid, as a rabbit, may have needed someone to hold that space for her, but we as humans have greater possibilities that can come through other (any encounter, partnership, companion, friend, family member, loved one, teacher, or mentor) in the same way, or through ourselves holding that space for our inner child and essence.
But like Astrid, the more ways you move energy through you by opening to and engaging a variety of experiences, the greater balance and well being you will create because this mirrors your multi-dimensional essence, which is part of what we’re activating more of collectively. The smaller we play and the more limited place we play from, the more we separate rather than unite who we really are.
We each have layers to who we are. And these layers brought forth invite more to the table, individually and collectively.
Like Astrid is the loving, the playful, the wise, and the amazing – so too are you the loving, the playful, the wise, and the amazing you.
As promised, today’s Ask Astrid blog is the sequel to Wednesday’s Part 1 that shared the same title. It involves a precognitive dream I had about Astrid a few days after the collective dream involving the wild and prehistoric animals I chronicled in that post. I didn’t realize at first that the same theme ran through it until days later, as I continued interpreting and integrating the message. There were of course personal energies involved, but they reflected the bigger picture moving through me, and as a result, also moving through Astrid since she and I always go through similar things even if in different ways.
I often have some of my clearest and most telepathic or precognitive dreams come through my rabbit companions – on and off Earth – as well as my Russian tortoise, Gaia. I remember one many years back where Nestor let me listen through her ear and I journeyed through it to where my parents lived (far away from me at the time) and heard an exact conversation they were having, which I relayed to them and got confirmed the next day. It was her way of showing me that the telepathic lines were open to receive clear messages through our connection and through telepathy itself.
From then on, the telepathic channels between me and my beloved soul companions who once did, or currently do, inhabit animal bodies have been opened and I receive powerful messages to assist the shift of times through my personal experience of it.
That kind of profound dream experience has happened with Nestor, Joy, Cosmo, Gaia, and of course, now, Astrid.
But this dream I had last week was a psychic one, and what unfolded in waking life ended up having the connection to the theme from the previous one. I didn’t know until a couple of days later that it would turn out to be precognitive, but it did indeed foresee what was going to happen to Astrid and its immediate effects on both of us.
In the dream I saw Astrid after some kind of incident/accident had taken place. I didn’t know what the particulars were of how, but the result was finding her with the tip of one of her paws cut off. I remember feeling horrified about it and although it was cut off, I didn’t see evidence of blood, but could see inside as if it were hollowed out from where it came off. I looked around for a towel to wrap it in and remember having difficulty trying to figure out what vet to take her to for like an hour, as I was stressing over my sweet girl’s condition. That’s all I remember.
I woke the next morning feeling bothered by it and relayed the dream to Dave, as I usually do when I have very clear and detailed or odd ones. He told me it was just a random dream, as his way to assure me.
Well, a couple of days later, I’m woken in the middle of the night by noise downstairs. My intuition and mom instincts know immediately that it’s Astrid dashing around the living room like crazy, as a result of being spooked by our male cat, Boojum. I get out of bed because I can hear her continue freaking out and running about, and start to head down the stairs when in the dimly lit corridor I see her shadow sprinting up the stairs and the sound of her nails on the wood clambering and sliding about from her speed. She’s in flight mode and when she gets scared like that it’s hard to center and calm her for a while. The only thing she knows – that any rabbit or prey knows – is to run like heck and escape at all means. When she sees me she doubles back down the stairs leaping several steps at once and appearing to take a sliding side tumble (or at least that’s what I could make out in the shadowy dark), not expecting me to show up, and then turns back around and passes me, while heading under the bed upstairs to hide.
All I remember is being horrified by the sound and sight – just like in my dream – as I’m just thinking about her injuring herself while running blindly.
I continue down the stairs just to see if my instincts had been right and there was Boojum, sheepishly sitting upright in front of the opening to her pen, as if to say, “What? I didn’t do anything.”
I knew that he’d entered her area in the middle of the night to steal some hay or water while she was peacefully just laying there in her meditative/off-planet mode, as she does, and when she realized he was there it was too late. It felt like a stealth attack and her prey instincts put her in flight mode, feeling like she was threatened by this sneaky predator moving in the shadows nearby.
I immediately ran back upstairs to check on her and found her huddled under my side of the bed, scared. I talked to her calmly and was worried, wondering if she was alright.
I went to the center of the room in front of the bed and laid down to wait for her to come out and she did. That’s when I noticed her lifting her front right paw up now and then, as if it was tender to put weight on it. And then she stopped to sit and lick at it and groom her face and the paw. This was on and off now and then. So of course I panicked, thinking she may have broken, fractured, or sprang her paw.
I was a mom mess at 2 am.
Like I’ve done in the past with my babies, I decided to lay there on the floor with her all night if necessary. I remember once spending the entire night, awake, under the bed with Nestor when she was sick, in order to see her through the night.
So I grabbed my pillow and wrapped a towel over me (all I could find quickly) and laid by her side in the dark while administering Reiki and calling forth all of my healing energies and help. I did this for about two hours and she stayed next to me laying mostly still and only moving a few times in different positions. When she did move she was still lifting or licking her paw, but grateful for my presence, the energy, and my talking her through the fear to a place of centered calmness again. You can be assured I gave my all for love.
She nosed me a few times and after the last time she did so, she then made her way back down stairs, saying, “Thank you and I’ll be alright now.”
I felt her telling me she wanted me to get some rest, so I made my way back to bed, falling asleep while sending her more healing energy and praying for the highest good to unfold the next morning. I only slept a couple of hours.
I woke and checked on her immediately and she was doing her normal routines, eating, drinking, pooping – all signs we rabbit parents look for because they are crucial to their well being. But on rare occasion I still saw her pick her paw up slightly or lick it. Not often, but even if once, it’s enough to warrant worry.
I couldn’t see anything and there wasn’t any blood anywhere. I didn’t want to poke and prod too much in case of anything being broken. So, I felt that taking her to a vet was the better option than my digging around. The challenge being that the next day we had to leave to travel to our new location, it was a Friday, and we were in a small mountain town.
I searched online and found a local vet, five minutes away, but didn’t see anything about them treating rabbits or exotics. I looked up where we were going next and DID find a vet that treated rabbits there and had great reviews about their rabbit knowledge and care.
While I wrestled with what was in her best interests – waiting to get her to a rabbit vet, or taking her in immediately to a vet that didn’t treat rabbits, I went upstairs to get ready in case I needed to leave right away while I asked for a sign and the highest good to be clear.
As I made my way to the second floor, my eyes were directed to something tiny on the corner of the stairs. I bent to pick it up and discovered the puzzle piece needed.
It was Astrid’s nail – the whole thing! I know her nails because she has dark blackish-brown ones and they are very thick. So now I knew that she had lost a full nail in her frantic clambering on the stairs in the middle of the night. Oddly, there was no blood on it, her paw, or the carpets or stairs, and the end where it came off was hollowed.
So far, all of this mirrored my dream – the tip of her foot cut off (in fact turned out to be her nail), the hollowed out area where it came off was how the nail appeared, as well as no signs of blood. The towel I looked for in the dream to wrap her in seemed to end up being the towel I wrapped myself in for the two hours I laid with her and yes, I did spend time trying to figure out which vet was best, as I weighed all the options and played out the scenarios and how they would affect Astrid in the long run – just like how in the dream I stressed for an hour about the same.
Finding the full nail with hollowed end posed the concern that I might not be able to see the site of where the nail came off and it could get infected, and that with this kind of pressure to rip it off, perhaps she might have a broken toe or some other kind of damage.
I decided to call both vets. First the rabbit vet where we were headed to get their thoughts. They agreed that if I could get her in right away it would be better, to avoid potential infection. Problem was we’d be traveling Saturday, so couldn’t get her in that day and both vets were closed on Sunday, so Monday was only available at the new place. But to me, that was just too long to wait and wonder, or have things potentially go wrong. Still, I made an appointment there just in case, as they had barely any spots open, while I continued to assess the situation.
I then called the local vet to ask if they saw rabbits, see what they thought, and to relay the incident, as to me it felt like something that could be assessed even if not expert with rabbits being that dogs and cats can also lose nails.
To my luck, the technician that answered was very sympathetic to the situation, has had many rabbits of her own, knows how to handle them, and knows quite a bit about them. She asked the doctor if she’d see Astrid even though it’s not her specialty and the doctor was more than accommodating. She relayed that if any extra advice or meds were needed that the doctor would confer with rabbit vets she knew in other areas. They were completely full that day, but said if I could drop her off in the next half hour after their scheduled surgery that morning, they would fit her in in between the appointments that day and watch her for us in the meantime.
So, I took her right away. I was sad to have to leave her for a few hours, especially since we were traveling the next day, which meant she’d have to be in her traveling case two days in a row. I also didn’t like leaving her with an injury by herself, but with the pandemic, curbside drop-offs and pick-ups are the only way anyway.
Of course I spent those long hours away from her thinking of her, telepathically talking to her, and sending energy while I calmed myself down in the solitude of the mountain on a ski run all by myself awaiting the doctor’s call.
And I got the best possible news. The doctor called and confirmed that she had torn off the nail, but there was no redness, no blood, no swelling, or any signs of inflammation or tear to the skin surrounding it. Although it was a relatively new injury, it all looked fine. The soft inner part of the nail stub was still there (why I saw the hollowed out bottom portion of the nail) and she said that’s why her paw is sensitive. She said it’s like if we cut our nails too short and that sensitivity we’d experience. So if she happens to touch it a certain way, this is why she will pick it up or lick it, as it’s tender. But the good thing is, it is not a weight bearing toe that she lost it from. So this is why there’s only occasional tenderness experienced.
And, she examined the foot and toe and felt no breaks in the bone so didn’t feel it necessary to x-ray her. Even if her toe had been fractured, it simply would have to heal on its own, as there’s little they can do and she said that rabbits heal pretty quickly in this regard. That actually was the case for the human/part rabbit me 😉 as I’ve broken my toe and both feet in recent years and there was no setting involved – just natural healing time to mend.
The doctor noted the same as I did that Astrid didn’t seem to be in any major pain except for the random tenderness, which had already decreased since the time of first impact. We both agreed that meds didn’t feel like the right option since she continues with all of her normal behaviors, is moving around normally, and there’s no sign of infection beginning. Meds can mess with their digestive systems and eating behaviors. So, I was told to keep an eye on her and if any behaviors change or I notice infection beginning, her not able to stand on the paw, or bad odor from the paw (sign of infection), to bring her in immediately. The nail will eventually grow back and once it starts in a few weeks, it will grow strong around the inner soft part and she’ll be good as new. This vet said they actually weren’t going to be open this weekend at all, but told me to call her and she’d come in just for her, which was very sweet. Or, I could take her to the rabbit vet in our new location.
I went to pick her up and she was so happy to see me and go back home. She continued on with normal behaviors and I hardly saw her pick her paw up, if at all, and the next morning we were on the road with Astrid on my lap in her carrier doing amazing as she always does.
We arrived at our new place where we won’t be leaving again for four weeks, so it’s the perfect settled time to allow her nail to heal, while there’s a good rabbit vet close by if needed, and for both she and I to integrate all of the energy themes streaming through.
And it didn’t take her long to get comfy in her new surroundings. I was grateful to find there to be no stairs in the new place, wall-to-wall carpeting so it would be soft on her paws, and a cozy compact home for the family to be all close together. Since getting here I haven’t actually seen her lift or lick her paw like she was anymore and she’s continued with all normal behaviors. In fact, she’s zoomed around with exuberance, binkied, and flopped harder than I’ve ever seen her flop (even Dave remarked he’d never seen her do this) – all signs of one happy, healthy, secure bunny. And she’s continued to have a fully open pen 100% of the time with mutual trust between us.
She’s even found her new throne.
Don’t you just love all the cute, eclectic western boots surrounding her and the bears, moose, and fish on the ottoman guarding her that connect with the animal messenger theme of Part 1 and with how I keep mentioning the recurring appearance of bears in my dreams, the sighting of the moose a few weeks ago, and my being a Pisces (the fish, who inhabit the watery emotional depths of the sub and unconscious).
The boots feel to reflect the spirit of independence, confidence, endurance, the American dream, traditional values, and visions of the old South West. They also speak to New Frontiers and having a dream you’re not afraid to go after. And while they were the beginning of freedoms for some, they also stomped on the freedoms of others.
Astrid LOVES this chair so much and will sit in it while we watch movies at night, lay in it sometimes awaiting us to come home from our outdoor time, and sits in it at night while we sleep. How do I know that? Because I can see both the chair and her pen space from where I sleep at night and can see her shadow and silhouette of her ears peacefully sitting on her throne listening to the silence of the night darkness.
It’s a great vantage point for her to stay centered and aware of all that is around her. Perhaps assisting her to be more present and conscious with expecting the unexpected.
It’s been a huge relief to see her bounce back immediately and on her way to healing. It’s also been so beautiful to see her pick right back up and build upon all of her enhanced connective, joyous, and expansive behaviors she’s evolved into on this journey. The cats have even been hanging out with her more. We’ve witnessed more nose-to-nose encounters with Boojum and Sweet Pea hanging out with her under the bed.
And as for the tie-in with Part 1, indeed there is the connection to releasing primal patterns that came through the actual experience itself that Astrid went through.
She had a moment of vulnerability, like I did the day I could feel the streaming through of collective anxiety, and then got overwhelmed by the oncoming primal energy that Boojum in his predator and very raw, primal behaviors embody. He’s not a super spiritually focused soul, but instead has come into this life to be more base and core focused in his experience of life – to feel the sensual aspects of physicality, luxuriating in ego-based immediate needs, and being instinctual and survival motivated. In this way, he reflects to me Astrid’s T-Rex.
Boojum didn’t mean to harm Astrid, but the primal energy he carries was a trigger to the core prey essence that is embedded within Astrid’s DNA, even if she IS conscious of more. And when we aren’t present and grounded (she is often integrating and journeying off-planet or in the in between realms), then things can knock you off balance very easily. They can take you by surprise and cause trigger reactions instead of having the ability to respond with more presence when you are embodied and centered.
The wild and prehistoric animal dream in Part 1 spoke to the clearing initiation for big change coming through the purging and releasing of old core energies. These collective pools of untamed, primitive and survival mode instincts have been unconscious for so long and are now surfacing in order to integrate them more consciously through compassionate embrace.
On some level Astrid called this experience up in order to move through more of these patterns and releases, just as I was working through them after the dream, and we all are worldwide.
As I mentioned, we also seem to help buffer the energy for others, the more we each can work through the energies, and I feel that Astrid did her own share of that buffering in taking on the old prey/predator, victim/perpetrator energies. On a soul and higher self level, she wasn’t afraid to face this fear – one of the greatest she would have as a prey animal. And played out this triggering experience in order to move through it, just as I have been facing the fears of the mountains through skiing every day these past weeks so I can integrate the core patterns more of these unknown terrains and these vulnerable spaces.
And rather than have something really horrible happen, it was only her nail – the tip of the foot that represents Pisces, watery, unconscious energies (like the ocean the animals ran to in my previous dream) that broke off. But it was not a vicious or horrible injury. It was one that evoked tenderness, both in helping to remember the value of the incident and the energies through physical tenderness, and to represent the bridge to wholeness and healing – through a tender heart and more compassion and kindness.
This was demonstrated by how she’s held no ill feelings toward Boojum or either cat, when she could very well have gone into defensive mode with charging and grunting and running them off when they come around. She could also have allowed the old triggers to consume her and put her in fear mode, but neither happened.
Instead, I’ve seen her AND the cats both engaging one another more since we arrived to our new place and without animosity or fear. They have been sitting closer, edging into each other’s spaces, seeking to be with one another, and Astrid has even allowed Boojum to sit at the back of her throne above and behind her while she sits in it, with both of them at peace. There’s even been a lot of super cute engagement on Astrid’s part where we witness her literally hopping in front of Boojum back and forth, asking him to play with her.
Just as I wrote in Part 1, “the interaction confirmed for me that these energies only hurt us if we try to run from them, dismiss, fight, or even deny them. There’s a sense of their wanting acknowledgment and understanding of their place within the framework.”
Although Astrid was thrown into a core reactive place of panicked fear when Boojum startled her, it was evident after the two hours I laid with her doing energy work for the highest good that night, that she had moved through things and integrated it with my support.
We are both deepening into being bridges of compassion for the collective purging, as best we each can. And while the DNA redesign that we’re all experiencing is hugely transformative, it feels like it can be integrated with greater ease than one might think. It asks of us to be open to the possibilities, to expect the unexpected, surrender to tenderness, and to trust that things are in divine alignment for the highest good of all concerned.
So, Part 2 was about a revealing, precognitive dreamscape that prepared me for the unraveling of Astrid’s literal experience to release primal patterns. On some level, the dream helped me to process things on the subconscious levels so that I could be more present for her.
Yet, at the same time, it was a shared experience of releasing primal patterns, as I feel everything Astrid does as if it’s my own, and so we went through it all together. I got to have my triggered reactions to it all, breathe my way back to centering and empowerment, and together we harnessed love to walk us through it. Not to mention, I was able to look at my own old patterns of judgment or fear around these energies through those raw emotions that took place at 2 am in the full darkness of the night.
But when brought to light in the dawn of the day, the shadowy figures, horrifying sounds and sights, and raw fears all softened to reveal the heart’s resiliency through compassion and willingness to understand each part for what it is.
Of course there is so much more I could express about all of the symbolism that took place through this experience, but you may be able to uncover those pearls for yourself.
I actually thought that this would be the conclusion to this theme desiring to be channeled through, but in fact on 2/2/21, three nights ago, I had another dream that wants to be shared and within that dream I was specifically shown three parts. So, I guess there’ll be one more.
To say I adore my soul companion in rabbit body, Astrid, is an understatement and the depth of that love is far more than snuggly sweetness we share between us (although that definitely is a big part of it). It includes how much I admire and am inspired by her agile spirit, strong heart, and wise instincts. I also love her humor and childlike innocence she so exuberantly and unabashedly displays, while the next moment standing in the unwavering power of her benevolent queen’s essence. She is so in tune with her body and feelings, and together we are like a finely tuned piano of black and white keys working in harmony. But that is something that doesn’t just happen overnight. It comes with committed patience, open-hearted presence, and willingness to be open to seeing each other as equals.
I’ve written quite a bit about animal communication, the importance of communicating everything with them, how we can share harmonious relationships with our animal companions, and in fact how important it is to keep deepening into the vortex of your heart so that possibilities in this realm will become the new norm. One of these shares was about how Astrid and our niece opened the communication channels, which you can read here: Animals Understand
And it’s just such clear communication channels between the two of us that assist during times of change.
I’ve been so very proud of this sweet, strong soul who has been fully back to having 100% free roam during our travel time away. The first week was a trial run of part-time closure within her giant, mobile pen the size of two and a half pens put together only while we were out during the day for a few hours and sleeping at night. This was for potential safety and damage control in foreign new spaces.
But after having a check-in and long conversation with her where she expressed her frustrations to me, I knew it was time to leave the door permanently open and this has continued since – she’s on three weeks of open pen and full free roam at all times.
We agreed on trust guiding things and with the freedom she would know that I honored her word and soul needs, which in turn she would reciprocate. And we’ve both kept our word.
Astrid’s soul is SO big and advanced, to contain her in more than just her physical body alone is spirit crushing – both to her and me. So it’s been back to full freedom always and that makes a happy queen and mom. She still uses her pen for the majority of the day and everything in it as her safe space and personal realm.
She’s shifted from guarding it all quite diligently from cat spies and robbers to relaxing into a new ease, while coming and going as she desires.
It’s been super interesting to watch both her old and new behaviors emerge, which have evolved to suit her temporary home life and reflect her transformation process. So far I’ve witnessed her behaviors change based on triggers from having an enclosed space, the different homes we’ve been in, the layout and space of the home, how she feels in it, the way the cats are behaving, and how she’s embracing being the traveling rabbit for the period of time I’ve told her we’ll be gone.
She’s gone from frustrated to empowered and joyful – from unsure to secure and confident.
She went from also knocking down her cardboard cabin, chewing on her mats and pen (even when it was open), tipping over hay bins and snack bowls, and being afraid someone would steal her treats, to complete peace, her usual tidy ways like back at home, and sense of security even if the cats lurk around.
The more we communicate and the more I demonstrate my trust in her, stand behind my word of never ever leaving her side, and literally holding her hand throughout every new transition of every single moment, the more she relaxes into even greater embodied empowerment.
One of the entertaining (although equally frustrating to me) behaviors she displayed was in the first home of three weeks we were in, where she became much more territorial. This was her way of asserting the need to honor her feelings while she traversed through the changes she was going through and learning how to process the new. This made her charge at or chase any cat that infringed on her realm. She was even temporarily back to charging when you put food in front of her (an old shelter response) until assured with pets and snuggles.
I especially got a giggle out of her stealth attack on our male cat Boojum. She would lay low in her cardboard cabin calmly with her amethyst, and if Boojum tried to pass (he’s known to steal her hay and water) she lunged at him with full speed and grunt, sending him on his way. She would then immediately and quickly retract back inside. This fast stealth strike and equally fast retreat back into oblivion had us calling her a little moray eel. 😉
She would also lay directly across the front of her small hay bin that is the bounty both cats will sneakily try to get, and basically like Gandalf from Lord of the Rings declared, “You shall not pass!”
There was never any violence or fight that ensued. She just asserted her boundaries and I LOVE that about her.
The cats know to back off because Queen Astrid is quite a force to reckon with energetically. You wouldn’t think so looking at her sweet silver butterfly kissed lips and twinkle toes, but she’s learned to be comfortable in her power of both strength and softness. She’s the Rabbit Queen, afterall!
In our first place she had morning moments of binkies and running laps with me in the master bedroom, but mostly processed how to integrate the new with staying in the main living area with us and asking dad for lots of extra snuggle time while he did his stretches on the floor. I loved how she looked to both of us (mom AND dad energies) for encouragement and love, as ingredients to the new she was deciding how to integrate.
And this behavior continued on the first leg of our journey until we got to our second landing spot.
With four weeks and already three of the seven road trips under her wings, she came to a steady and more anchored place of softened confidence, encouraged by her parents. And it is in this last week where even more of her exuberant and explorative inner child also made many more appearances again. She’s had a blast exploring the entire home from the get-go and not one night did she spend contained in her pen. It was only put up to create the feeling of her having her very own, safe realm within the new space, but it was left wide open all day and night long.
It’s a very nice space where she has a beautiful winter scape view.
She’s actually evolved into being the happiest I’ve seen her, the most social ever with everyone – not just me, the most self-assured and content, and super communicative, responsive, and interactive. She literally fills the space of the room, but in a sweet way that evokes a smile and invites you to play.
She doesn’t feel the need to own the room, but shares it with everyone and really has taken her spot as a bridge for the whole family.
There’s times we’ll come downstairs to find her sitting tall on the center round ottoman like the benevolent queen who is excited for the fun to begin and to let down her hair.
And in the evenings when we watch movies, she’ll move between laying like a bunny loaf in front of us on that ottoman, joining dad in his stretching exercises, and then jumping on and in between us on the couch, laying there awaiting pets and enjoying snuggle time.
There’ll of course be a few hops, zoomies, and teases, as she invites everyone to add play to our peaceful evenings.
You can tell by the last several photos where her favorite spot is right in the middle of all of the action and smack center of the energy in the room. It’s so endearing to see her in her essence and element and even Dave has remarked how she’s really blossomed in this new space and surprised him with how not only well she’s doing, but how she’s let out her personality even more.
It has been so fun to watch her surrender into her childlike self as she runs, jumps, binkies, and leaps with joy. The more guarded, old parts of her have relaxed again back to how she is at home, but also in a newly empowered way.
She’s jumped on every surface possible – couches, ottomans, wide adobe window sills – and had no problem running up and down the wooden stairs to the second floor so that she could explore there and also come thump by my side of the bed to tell me she’s ready for morning and morning snacks to begin!
She would run upstairs in the evenings while I’m working and tug on the comforter or the velcro attachment of my computer cord to let me know it’s dinner time.
She’s even followed me around at my feet, excitedly been coming when ever we call her name, and has been craving dad’s attention too, enjoying her teasing games with him for snuggles and carrots.
And during the day she securely rested in her cardboard cabin or sprawled out on the mat in her pen, awaiting us to return home.
She’s been finding her balance and like the collective, is mirroring how to revisit the old patterned, painful memories of her past, but realize that the now is nothing like that. So while she’s had trigger reminders of being locked up, abandoned, and badly handled come up through the experience of major change on her traveling adventure, she’s been able to revisit it safely and quickly with our loving and nurturing help, so that she can move through and beyond those old behaviors at even greater depths of clearing.
She’s realizing, through our communications and demonstrations of honor and trust for who she is – being seen and fully supported – that the old doesn’t have to define her anymore. She’s learning that it’s okay to demonstrate vulnerable frustration and have feelings come up, but she’s also realizing that they are in fact only based on what “used to be” and what “is” is something entirely different.
She understands our trust in her and she trusts that we will always be here for her.
She’s being supported into her authentic self and loved every step of the way. We don’t judge her for her actions while she processes the feelings and needs she has to draw lines. We honor her need for alone time and give her plenty of nurturing when she needs encouragement.
And she’s understanding that boundaries are healthy, but can also be bridges of understanding rather than violent separations.
In the latest new home she hasn’t had to be territorial in the same stealth way. She’s softened into a more direct line of communication because of being more at home with her feelings. She simply stands her ground with solid and sweet confidence and I’ve now found her sitting not far apart from both of the cats at any given time. In fact, they’ll all be huddled in a triangle of sorts, leaving you wondering what’s being plotted amongst them.
She’s coming into a new sense of how it is to be both soft and strong when in embodied empowerment.
There’s a whole new programming she’s undergoing within this experience, much like me and how I’m reprogramming my relationship to the old fears surrounding height edges and skiing that has more profound effects on a wide range of things beyond what meets the eye.
Never are our experiences isolated to self alone.
We’re both learning how to move through and transmute these primal patterns so that a new experience can be possible.
And this in fact also reflects what I feel the collective is moving through and rebooting as well – something I’ll likely share a little more reflections about in an upcoming post.
Astrid wanted me to remind you that her Ask Astrid Fridays are also open to any of you who might have questions for her.
Do you have something you’d like to ask Astrid?
If so, please send them along either in the comments below, or through the contact form and we’ll try to get some of them up in future posts.
Let me tell you a little story about a girl who was born looking human like many of you, but what pulsed through her blood was something quite different. Her brother always told her she was more animal (amongst other things) and it made sense given her connection with them. He also used to play telepathic games with her to test his intuition about these “other” parts he felt her to be. It was a bit unnerving when she discovered the game.
At age 12 her first rabbit companion came into her life and this changed everything. No longer did she feel quite so alone when looking at the stars. Her rapid heart rate when under duress or moving her body physically, mirrored that of rabbit. In rabbit, she found solace. Where there had not been an anchor to Earth, rabbit became the way shower to deepen into her chosen embodiment.
Life grew more challenging and at every turn of greater intensity and needed transformation, another rabbit companion would find her. The relationships deepened beyond outside human understanding. And it made sense to the little girl, now woman, that these souls in rabbit bodies were the only ones who could reach her.
Their starry essence was disguised to outsiders, but to the woman stardust was all she saw. And although quite Cosmic, these rabbits were so connected to Earth’s womb that it supported the woman’s journey to the union of spirit and body.
As the years went on, and through deep loss of her soul family in rabbit bodies, she came to know herself even more. Through pain she grew. To her surprise, her heart expanded with every trauma and, again, it was rabbit that taught her the gift within every experience.
When offered the invitation to be with them forever, she chose to stay and be as they had been for her – a way shower to unify spirit and body and bridge peace and harmony on Earth. Through that choice life changed in every way, beyond what she could have imagined possible.
Through that choice, I found her, and was also supported into greater alignment I had been waiting for.
Nature became the cathedral where essence was easily accessible. Here she could hear the whispers of all remnants of stars within every creation before her. And that included herself.
It became easy to drop into her own nature, by listening to the stories within every cycle unraveling before her. And as rabbits do, she found her joy playing in Earth’s realm. Her senses heightened, her body strengthened, and agility of being increased. There were times to go deeper underground and times to leap with elation. Times to be on high alert and times to lay still and listen. Even the foods she ate and loved, mirrored her rabbit friends and her world made sense through these new eyes.
Rabbit and woman were one.
It’s been incredible to watch this unfolding and with every day of her transformation comes a deepening to our bond as well.
I am able to go with her on every adventure she takes because we have merged through this evolution, too.
There is no separation. Essence brings Unity.
I love the journeys she takes me on daily in the mountainous forests where we live. I can feel the snowflakes on my nose, as they kiss hers. I hear the chickadees in my large ears, as they sing to her. I smell the fresh pine through my twitching nose, as she luxuriates in their aroma. I binky with joy when she becomes elated with wonder. I feel nurtured by the vibrations beneath my large thumpers, as she walks with deliberate and present footsteps.
And most of all my heart expands as hers does, every time she drops into essence and becomes both Heaven and Earth.
So much of what Astrid and I have been experiencing the past couple of weeks is an increased level of presence and pause – not altogether slamming on the breaks and stopping, but a deliberate slowing and gentle motion forward, clearing for clarity, while also being ultra open. Astrid would say it’s more of a “paws” – kind of like when she stops to clean her face with her two front paws, as you often see rabbits and other small creatures do where they sit on their back legs and lick their paws and rub their face, eyes, head, and run their ears through their sweet furry hands.
She’s still in motion, grooming, clearing, and giving herself almost like an aura cleanse, but she hasn’t altogether stopped moving even though she’s anchored to the ground on her big hind thumpers. And once she feels complete with one round of grooming in motion, I notice how she will sit very intentionally with nose moving rapidly and all of this information flowing through her and beaming out of her eyes. She may then move on to the next round of grooming.
She’s in process and it’s almost like a meditation if you watch a rabbit do this. It’s very soothing and this fluid motion is incredibly adorable as well.
So, in a way I’m “pawsing” along with her, continuing to move forward, but only in cue to the energy vibrations I feel pulsing through. Each step keeps leading me to the next and rather than stop the movement, I just hit the paws button and do more clearing, clarifying, and allowing, which has been incredibly interesting to see how ideas are gushing in with new possibility that wasn’t on my radar.
I’ve found this “zone” much like Astrid’s meditational grooming, where I feel like I continue to ride the energy currents with matching my vibration, and don’t have to create these separate compartments to everything where I start this, stop that, need to completely hault or walk away, or feel forced to make a choice. I just keep myself in a rhythm of openness without attachment and this creates the feeling of riding a current.
I bring it throughout everything and is kind of like how I’ve explained my life to be more like a walking meditation.
Decisions and steps are also becoming a more fluid journey as well.
It’s almost like being a leaf on a stream.
Sometimes I might float faster. Other times things slow down. Sometimes I might ride over some wild mini rapids through rocks or go from a wide part of the stream to a very narrow funnel head, until I’m popped out the other end.
I may even get caught in a breeze or mini whirlpool that gently circles me about in what seems like one place.
But never do I completely stop unless I decide to anchor at shore along the journey and try my feet out on land for a bit to explore a destination of choice, until I decide to get back on my leaf and continue along the stream of life.
All the while I continue moving.
So there is a new kind of pause I’m feeling and it involves more of a “yes, and….” response.
Meaning, “yes that could work and so could this,” or “yes that feels possible and wow there’s this too.” So I explore each thing and stay open, which suddenly brings in a new wave to flow on. Each builds upon the other, but there’s an invitation to creativity and imagination for opening another level of possibility that could offer more expansiveness and take me down a new part of the stream that has more potential destinations along the shore of life.
It’s not that I won’t arrive at a choice, but I’m providing a wider playing field for potential and not seeing something as a dead end or a clear “no way.” I’m also not having to stop and stick my oar into the bottom of the stream to try to latch on to something desperately.
It’s curiosity meets presence and vibrationally keeping aligned with the stream.
I don’t know if it makes sense what I’m trying to put an experience of into words, but there you go.
Water is amorphous and so I am becoming more so I guess.
So, Astrid and I have been on “paws” while we fluidly groom life right now. We’re taking in each morsel and flowing along the frequency until it morphs into something else.
This right now has felt more important than trying to get off at a destination of choice, although some energy currents have led us eventually to choices, as they are mini journeys within the whole.
Others, have much more expansive effects and reach, so these ones we do the “paws” on to clear and cleanse, while inviting in a greater part of our imagination.
It’s a much more enjoyable ride now because of remaining open without need to control and stop the process.
And it truly wasn’t until today’s share, that I’ve reflected on trying to explain a process that has now become my natural.
It’s like that with everything truly.
At first things could seem like retraining yourself or looking at all of the parts, but then they become the natural you.
Lately I’m seeing that there really isn’t work involved and things fall into that natural rhythm simply by remaining open to what is wanting through.
There’s a lot of wisdom in the “paws.”
Astrid’s nose twitches in agreement.
I’ve noticed a shift in a lot of people who have been more inclined to remain behind the scenes and perhaps struggled with being more public and sharing their gifts, now stepping out in bigger ways. There seems to be a shift of welcoming more vulnerability and more connection and I’m sure it is happening both as others continue to light the way for us in this regard AND as the collective shifts into being more ready, or more in need, to receive those of us who may have felt more like the minority or outcasts.
It’s not that everyone will do this in some huge or flashy way, but even if it’s just opening to connecting more with local community, finding yourself opening to a small circle of friends or sharing more with your family than you have before, or sharing your work through different channels you may not have ventured into in the past, there does seem to be a move toward allowing yourself more space in the world, feeling more safe or courageous, and ultimately creating more connection through opening to being seen.
And as this momentum of “being seen” more unfolds, it seems to be going hand-in-hand with seeing more expansively – meaning perspective shifts are taking place and more options are presenting themselves, which boils down to a feeling of being open to entertaining greater possibilities and feeling more safe to take up space.
Astrid wanted me to share how even she is stepping “out” more, as she just yesterday debuted alongside me in a short video I posted via social media as invitation to our New Moon Gratitude Challenge Giveaway.
She’s not shy in sharing messages, but she isn’t always too keen on videos. Photos have been alright, but anytime I try to capture her on video she either just stares me down, moves away, or stops altogether whatever it is she was doing that caught my attention to capture on video in the first place.
She is ready to be seen more and accompany me as a team. So I’m allowing her that safe space to venture in as she feels and by doing it together, it seems to be a way for us both to open to more and share in a new way to others.
It is also her way of letting me know that she is going to be upping her game. And I know that means I better get ready, because if she’s expanding that means I’ll be rising to the occasion to continue matching vibrations for the work evolving for us with these shifts.
I’m not sure if everyone will be able to access the video, but here’s a link just in case.
So that’s a wonderful new development for her and for both of us together.
It all seems to speak to a movement of greater visibility within and without. People are seeing and experiencing themselves more clearly, finding more courage, and things are rising to the surface.
As this happens, our vision is shifting and we’re also more capable of welcoming and inviting in new options that we weren’t so keen on before or weren’t vibrationally a match for before.
This leads to being willing to try new things – just like Astrid is opening to being in videos with me. Even her having her weekly blog is part of this greater visibility, as she steps into a new role herself.
And each time we allow something more into our experience, greater possibilities are available. We realize we aren’t confined to just one or two ways to do something, but that there are many ways we might express the same desires and gifts we have.
Choices are more prevalent and of course that means making decisions can be more challenging. Yet, since the choices are simply varying ways you can express a similar essence and energy, then truly there isn’t a wrong choice – just choice.
When we are more willing to see ourselves and be seen, to extend ourselves in new ways, we find greater courage to make choices without feeling they limit us.
Choices take us to the next step.
They are a bridge.
And from there we can make another choice.
Astrid encourages me to share about my recent experience, so here it is.
Lately I’ve felt more inward, for various reasons having to do with life changes taking place – I may do a separate blog on that upcoming – but after having a much more public presence with my work in the past in terms of teaching and so forth, I have pulled out of that for some time now.
I still have a public presence online for sharing my new creations and anything Astrid and I feel might be helpful or inspiring, and for nurturing special connections, but I have felt drawn to be more by myself, otherwise, and especially so in the physical – preferring to stay home or do things separately, rather than attend lots of gatherings and so forth.
Wednesday night, however, I stepped out (just as Astrid did yesterday) and decided to go to a meditation group with Dave. It’s one he meets with regularly each week. I’ve not been nudged to go because I have my own “walking meditation of life,” because of feeling I needed my own space, and also having a lot of things I wanted to use the time differently for.
This evening would be different, as one of the people was inviting everyone for dinner after and it was the end of the month’s theme before a new one would be coming – I didn’t know that until I went.
I decided to re-immerse myself in a group setting, which is reminiscent to my teaching days, to see how it would feel.
It’s a wonderful group, great people, good vibes, and peace filled.
What was interesting is that normally they have about 5-7 people usually, but of course the day I decide to go they have the most – 13. No coincidence.
It involves a meditation, either in silence or guided for about a half hour, and then an open discussion around the month’s theme – mindfulness was May’s.
Other than introducing myself and why I was there, which was a round-circle intro at start, I didn’t say a peep.
But I was very present and listened and felt into how I felt being there.
At the end of the conversation one of the facilitators asked if anyone had ideas for the next month’s theme. Five or six ideas were thrown out and when everyone was done brainstorming I suddenly was nudged to speak.
It was surprising to me that I did, since I just don’t speak just to speak and mostly stay in observing mode unless I’m teaching, which puts me in a different position. But the feeling was so strong that I just honored it.
In a nut shell my theme ended up being self-love. I detailed why, taking into account everything I’d heard from everyone that evening, the questions people were exploring, answers searched for, and even the themes they came up.
Self-love, to me, was the umbrella for all of them and I explained why.
I was the last to speak and they took a poll after and they ended up unanimously choosing my topic.
I had no idea that my thought would have that impact.
Later that evening at dinner, a few people thanked me for the topic, as they felt challenged by it and knew it was important because of that. Another thanked me for the reminder, as it felt exactly what they needed with things they’ve been working on and had forgotten. Another reiterated that it was an answer to the example he’d given about how to permanently clear a glass of water that’s dirty – symbolism used during the evening’s discussion.
I was grateful I had gone that night and listened to the nudge to allow myself to be seen again more, but in a different capacity.
It reiterated to me what I find to be my strengths in groups, which one of them is my ability to hold a present and neutral energy.
And I found it interesting that the theme everyone felt was exactly what they needed, whether it felt comfortable or not, was also the one this year’s Challenge ended up being about – of which I had just hours before posted on my blog.
In self-love and nurturing, finding those depths within to appreciate and bring to light, we do indeed shine our lights more, open to being seen, and invite more expansive ways of seeing what is possible.
So, both Astrid and I had a “stepping out” this week. We stretched beyond what was currently our comfort zone, which merged both an inward growth that had an outward reach.
We embraced our gifts and made space for them to grow and see where they might lead next.
And that leads us both wanting to leave you with the reminder of our New Moon Gratitude Giveaway Challenge.
Originally we said to let us know by end of today, May 31st, if you felt called to join us, but we’re extending that to the end of this Sunday, June 2nd.
We already have a lovely group of people officially joining and a couple who are joining, but on their own, yet want to do it during the same time so that they combine their efforts and energy collectively.
I know it’s challenging to look at yourself and perhaps challenging to think how you could possibly come up with 10 things a day to be grateful for and why about yourself. It’s okay if some might pop up more than once throughout the 8 days, as perhaps that theme is speaking a lot and it’s an important thing getting your attention. It’s also wonderful if you actually have unique things each day. It challenges you to shift your perspective and find the things you’d easily be able to “out there,” but now do so “in here.”
You are a creative being and that makes you limitless in how to be curious and look at yourself.
They don’t have to be profound things.
They simply need to be about you.
You are beautiful and worthy of this.
I believe fully if you embrace something like this – even if not officially by joining us – that you will feel and experience a shift and may find greater clarity to directions you’re contemplating, perhaps less doubt, more joy, a positive outlook, feel even more compassionate, and even see things shift outside of you or become clearer because of the new way you’re relating with yourself. It may just make you feel much better about you and that makes your experiences with others much better.
If you do want to join us, please let me know either in the comments or message me directly through my CONTACT PAGE.
Wishing you all a beautiful weekend as you anchor into the New Moon energy.
Astrid has been both extra loving outward AND open to and willing to ask for extra love for herself these days. And while she has been demonstrating this, I’ve noticed myself turning even more attention to self-nurturing than I already do and hearing from others who are finding circumstances and cycles making it essential that they, too, turn the love light back on to themselves as well.
The above photo shows her giving to, and receiving from her calming and powerful master amethyst rabbit friend. She spends a lot of time tuning in with, giving velvety tongue kisses to, and laying next to her crystals, to include the three giant quartz you see to her right – the golden and pinky lilac quartz from Tahoe and the smaller one in front from Montana – found right after Joy transitioned, on one of the most magickal Faery hikes ever not far from her place of departure.
Nurturing is a vital element of well-being, growth, productivity, and ability to thrive. There is much our hearts long to do and give out, but we simply can’t only be flowing energy in one direction. We know this concept, but do we put it into action?
If we don’t slow down, many times we find ourselves forced to.
If we get stuck in our heads, our hearts will cry out.
If we’re tired, but keep pushing, our bodies give out.
If something needs our attention, it’s sure to get it.
If we overextend our energy, the boundaries we haven’t exercised become strict teachers drawing the lines for us.
If we simply need a pause or extra softening to ensure well-being, our emotions may feel extra sensitive so that we nurture more tenderness to ourselves.
While Astrid and I have been re-evaluating and redirecting ourselves, I’ve noticed that both the changes that are formulating and my own body’s rhythms are needing extra attention that involves even more self-care and self-love.
As I get closer to 50, hormones are shifting, more solidity in myself is forming, and more questions come up as to the life I/we want to create for the time remaining.
This creates more reflection and sensitivity that desires a lot of love be directed within and Astrid is mirroring this with the evolution of her growth as well. This brings the two of us in even stronger bond together, as we navigate this new cycle we’re stepping into.
A new level of awareness and embodied response seems to be in motion.
I find myself implementing more self-care routines, listening to my body’s needs, and creating greater clarity of alignment.
Sleep has always been important to me on many levels, but lately I find myself so enamored with that time of day when I lay my head on my pillow. Although the day is full of enriching things, I so look forward to that time of restoration and dream work at night. It feels like it’s own elixir and healing supplement.
As I have been writing this, Astrid has been to my left suspended in a state of meditation – quite literally. I’ve never seen her do this before, but she was in a position where her head was bowed down in a curve fully toward her heart, like the neck of a graceful swan, and has held it there for minutes on end, with eyes in a tranced deep state and her not budging.
Her shape also creates the effect of one half of a heart.
Synchronously, I was feeling how she and I seem to have been expressly made for each other as a reflection and other half, while I then noticed her in this suspended position.
She always knows what I’m thinking – or rather, she simultaneously sends me the message that becomes my own thought.
We are definitely two halves of a shared heart.
And that seems to be her message to me.
We are mirroring the needs and awareness our hearts speak.
And all of the love and special nurturing and understanding I extend to her, ultimately is about touching my own heart that she reflects.
I believe her message is simple.
We may think we are only feeling strongly compelled to give to and nurture others and what touches our hearts out there, but even if we don’t ever want to look further into what anything means, ultimately the connection we share to everything is glowing brightly from our heart within.
Perhaps that’s why so many healers, therapists, counselors, teachers, creatives, visionaries, activists, etc. are compelled by helping others or a cause.
Some call it the wounded healer, but it’s simply a desire to love ourselves as the reflection we love out there.
And when we love out there, to realize how much we love what’s in here.
It’s walking through life with full open heart, flowing in and out.
It shifts how we respond to life simply carrying the awareness of connection.
Both Astrid and I have been feeling this Scorpio Full Moon in the days leading up to it quite strongly. I wasn’t paying attention specifically to it, but Astrid just like all rabbits, was hugely attuned to the Moon and the Cosmic frequencies pulsing through Earth. She gave me her wise and endearing look when I had that a-ha moment of connecting dots to recent experiences with the energies abound. She knows I don’t need confirmations of things, but that it does put reason to the rhyme of cycles that take place seemingly out of the blue.
There is definitely a collective release taking place and a ton is shifting on the subtle inner landscapes, which I feel is what is happening to so many people I’ve heard from where there’s a mix of intensity surging through alongside breakthroughs. It’s also what’s playing out on the world-wide level.
I recently explained it like this to a dear friend after my post about releasing the In Lak’ech series of Five paintings:
After posting that yesterday, I found myself done for the day. It was kind of a collapse or surrender. I am feeling the collective release it involves, which I feel is taking place right now across the globe, as we enter greater depths of these shadow parts finally. They are awakening to the conscious level more, or at least starting to surface or break away… this reminds me of cleaning a caked-on greasy pan in sink water. The more you scrub, the dirtier and murkier the water gets, and it might take a while to scratch away at it, but small particles release and eventually surface before everything is wiped away. It feel like the collective is at these stages of scrubbing and releasing stuff into the consciousness pool and now we’re all figuring out what to do with them and what kind of clarity we would like to see come from it. And individually, we’re doing this too for the collective…Although I know we are constantly cracking these codes to free us of conditioned enslavement, the impact on these subtle levels is so tricky. We may see it, or not, but then to actually do something with it is a whole other thing.
We are left with a dilemma, when once we tap into more of our true power, as to what we want to create from here on forth.
Astrid and I have both been going through a huge purging on the outer landscape, to reflect what we’re shifting on the inner landscape.
I shared about it on my Instagram and that’s what the photo above is about, which felt so fitting for Astrid’s post message today about letting go.
This was the caption I used for it:
After a year and a half of enjoying her royal throne, with only small redecorating touches recently, she decided to follow in mom’s footsteps and completely go wild with change. She’s been watching me with wide eyes, as first I did tiny changes (and so she mirrored that) and then I undid both our shared office space and my bedroom closet, throwing things on the floor and bed big time (and so she did the same), as I completely revamped everything with the biggest Spring purge and reorganizing I’ve done to date. Immediately in response, Astrid decided to go crazy on her chair and not only broke through the pretty adornments I’d added for her from her last redecorating choice, but took out the foam insides into bunches of pieces! I couldn’t do anything but laugh when I saw her laying like this so proud with evidence of her work all around her, as if to say to me, “look at the work I’ve done too so I can embrace the new!” So, I’ve since redecorated her center rug without chair, which she’s feeling out and enjoying so far. I did find another chair, in case she decides she wants one again, that I think may work very well for her without need for “redecorating” but am holding off to see how she likes the new set up first and will go from there. Gotta love her! We’re so much alike!
We are both enjoying the fresh openness created by these changes, which allows for the new to flow in more freely and easily. It’s also enabled us to draw in what is frequency-aligned because of our shifts, while also holding an open free space for the unknowns we can’t see yet to find their way to us.
Sometimes we don’t know what is to come or what something looks like that we want, but in letting go, we clear our energy fields so the clarity of that authentic-now inner voice can bring to us the perfect things we had no idea with our minds would be for our highest.
A clear heart draws in clarity.
We become the abundant beings that we are and the way to draw in something aligns all on its own because of taking that action of trust.
Every time we trust and release, abundant energies continue as they are meant to, by flowing in and out.
This Scorpio Moon highlights letting go, regenerating, deepening, intensifying, creating more intimacy with all of our parts, reclaiming our essence and inner wisdom, delving into the mystique and magick of the inner labyrinth, invoking greater courage, clarifying more understanding, making way for the new, and reviewing or perhaps even renewing any intentions you may have.
A flooding of emotions can definitely be part of this, as fears, deep unconscious and shadowy stuff releases into light.
I’ve noticed that since Astrid’s chair was removed, she’s spent a lot of time on the center of her round sparkly green, grass-looking rug under her favorite black iron butterfly sleigh where magickal things sit atop the three platforms that float above her.
It feels to be like an etheric rabbit tunnel of that deep mystery, magick, and Cosmic abyss she is harnessing for transmutation.
I get that she wanted some more open space right now as a clear slate she and I can create from.
Astrid shares, “As you write your new story, so am I. And yet, we are writing it together. One that tells of many journeys yet to share in ways creativity has yet to birth. We are engaging a Cosmic excavation accessed deep within our hearts and it connects us both to the heart of ourselves, and to one another – to include all consciousness. Most importantly it connects us to the heart of creation that is ours to weave anew. So what holds you back? Although time is an idea, there is no greater moment than now to begin. It doesn’t matter what has gone before. With every discomfort and stretch you dismantle the hold of roots awaiting the elixir of your love. What blossoms is of your making.”
I don’t know about any of you, but I for one have enough of anyone writing my story for me. And that includes the stuff I carry as both past fears, perceived limitations, and shared ancestral and collective conditioning.
Astrid is a protector of the sacred, embodied in a strong, courageous, and enduring rabbit body. She walks the worlds of both light and dark. She is both warrior and harmony keeper. She is a bridge of understanding and compassion because she has walked in each reality and can move in and out when necessary. She is action-oriented and also eternally patient.
She is a warrior of unconditional love in its highest form.
Today happens to be Cosmo’s birthday – my sweet rabbit son in the stars. He would have been 13.
He is an ambassador of love and compassion in pure essence.
Astrid is like the great guardian or protector of what he stands for both because she is the same AND because she has extra layers that enable her to merge into worlds he needn’t step into. He is the energy and she both is that energy as well as protects it with the ability to engage on levels that invoke the seed of potential to stir.
We all have different gifts and to embrace with clarity what they are is part of this letting-go energy through self-reflection that permeates.
If we are willing to see the hidden, which can be engaged with curiosity and a willingness to simply observe it without judgment, we can begin to bridge a new and more clear understanding of what stories have been our motivations in life.
We can see what has been working overtime in the background simply because we didn’t acknowledge it.
To have that willingness to see something creates a click within.
Just because we see it, doesn’t mean it can hurt us.
It only hurts us when we don’t want to see it, so it sabotages our lives because it can.
Astrid and I send our deepest love to you during these reflective and intense energies. You are not alone.