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Lake Tahoe’s Portal Working the Magick Once Again ~ Cosmo’s Incredible Journey & My Mission Continues


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One of the reasons I felt we were guided back to Lake Tahoe was for Cosmo in bringing him to both the resting ground and life affirming place of his teachers and best friends, along with the hope of getting him the best care at this time in his life. Tahoe has also been a portal entry and exit point for the major things in OUR lives, which I’ll share more on shortly, but upon returning here other synchronous unfoldings have confirmed all of this and our reasons for needing to be here at this time, regardless of what else may unfold or not. It never ceases to amaze how we can align ourselves so easily by simply supporting and following the voice within.

For instance my high-tech water filter that I purchased when living here 8 years ago broke down after arriving here and we just happen to be by its birth place in Reno for repairs if needed. Although, I’m considering a new and different filter since it is linked to an old cycle in my life.

Just like letting go of my beloved “Hunab Ku” hybrid SUV last year right when we moved into our Magick Bus, which just had its one year anniversary of selling on the 16th of this month, coincidentally just after arriving back to Tahoe a little over a week ago and coincidentally I’m in the place I first got it.

We also happened to be here to celebrate our anniversary and Dave’s birthday all within days of returning and on our first day up at the lake, I spread a bit of both Nestor’s and Joy’s ashes together on the water in celebration and so much more.

And of course there’s huge full circle closure and opening in terms of nearly all aspects of our lives, which I mentioned, that all culminate here in this portal including where both Dave and I went through painful divorces, lost our most beloved soul animal companions (Nestor and Kitty Boom Boom), where all of our current or recently transitioned animal companions (except Cosmo) came into our lives (Joy, Gaia, Sweet Pea and Boojum), where Dave went vegan 8 1/2 years ago and me 10 1/2, where I became a Reiki Master Teacher and started my teaching as well as truly committing to and fully embracing my path in totality, where I went through the tipping-point vigorous round of personal growth work that would catapult me, where we both went through major soul and emotional shifts with extreme lows and life-transformations that have set our current courses, as well as where we met, along with other profound low and high points.

So to say it’s a potent place for us is an understatement.

But back to my original focus – Cosmo.

Upon returning here, I did some research to find him the best care possible and as things do tend to align with trusting, I was guided to the perfect person for that, who was just a few minutes away from where we are stationed.

This vet, who was previously focused as a small animal veterinarian in a busy general practice and has worked with wildlife like sea otters, elk, etc. along the west coast, now runs a small private practice focused on providing compassionate integrative and rehabilitative care that combines conventional medicine with natural approaches. She’s certified in veterinary acupuncture, veterinary food therapy, traditional Chinese Veterinary Medicine, and Canine Rehabilitation therapy. She’s a member of the American Holistic Veterinary Medical Association, American Association of Traditional Chinese Veterinary Medicine, and American Association of Rehabilitation Veterinarians.

A gem of a find indeed.

After speaking with several places and making nearly a dozen calls, I left her a message in hopes she may be able to help Cosmo, since other places weren’t wanting to take on a rabbit for acupuncture except for one in Reno that was an hour and a half away.

And at this point, although I do take him for routine check-ups when necessary, I prefer him to get more holistic care that feels aligned with where he’s at in life and his soul needs. He’s always loved acupuncture and so that was my focus….I was just grateful to find even more!

Anyway, the doctor called back and told me that she doesn’t take rabbits normally because she had bad allergies to them over the years, but when she heard my story over phone she said she wanted to try and help.

Her willingness to do so was a huge plus in my book, as I’ve talked to other vets in the past who said the same and had no desire to try.

So I took Cosmo in this past week and she ended up having no issues. Yay! Her exact words were, “He and I are good.”

I don’t like going to regular vet practices because it’s so stressful for Cosmo. There are so many dogs and cats going in and out, and the last time there was so much barking and a cat crying in the back, that it was just not conducive for a little sensitive one who is a prey animal to be going for peaceful healing care.

But here at this place in Tahoe, it’s complete peace since it’s a private practice so it’s just the vet, me, and Cosmo.

She took her time to learn about him and try a round of different things including acupuncture, non-invasive laser to help with inflammation, something called “Loop” that targets Pulsed Electromagnetic Field Therapy, and did a lot of therapy on his legs as well as Tui Na massage, which is a pinch and roll for the back along the spine.

She also got out different herbs to try and see what he liked, which are good for his blood circulation and warming, along with other healing benefits. Cosmo immediately went for the magickal Angelica, which the doctor was so pleased about saying they always know what they need. She actually snapped a photo of him eating it while receiving acupuncture for her own records. In the office this was the only herb he went for, but since home he’s been enjoying the others she sent me home with too to try.

He also liked the Body Sore pill, which is a Chinese herbal formula that helps synergistically to relieve symptoms of back pain, soft tissue injuries, musculoskeletal pain, and addresses underlying causes of these symptoms. Its an herbal blend to assist in invigorating Qi/Blood where there is stagnation, assist with channel blockage, and relieve pain.

So she sent me home with some of these, along with a container of herbs, and a list of herbs/veggies good to assist with these things I can either continue using (in the case of my already giving him) or add to what I give him.

She even helped assist with shaving some of his matted fur. As I’ve shared before, since he lays on one side all the time and can’t move away from his eliminations, I have to bathe, dry, trim, and groom him. So his fur goes in cycles every few months of being really great and then no matter what you do, getting really matted and eventually needing to shed/peel away. So she helped with that and gave me natural ideas to put on his skin like coconut oil.

Our session ran over time by 25 minutes, but she was so patient in wanting to be thorough and help. And again, not to mention it was such a stress-free zone with no one there but us. So that was greatly supportive to the process.

It was definitely like Cosmo was having a bunny spa day, which makes mom happy and him feeling extra nurtured and loved.

He’s a little king for sure, which I call him….my animal companions I always refer to as Queens and Kings. 🙂

The vet also learned that I am a Reiki Master Teacher and said that if I decide to teach up in Tahoe, she’d be very interested in learning so she can add that to her practice too.

We’re figuring out a routine of sessions for him, which for now will be weekly, then something like biweekly or every three weeks or so for maintenance.

I’ve missed his Orange County vet who was incredible with Cosmo and did acupuncture too for him, because he loved going there and receiving it, but I now feel we have a great doctor here who has even more wonderful things to offer him and minus going into a regular practice. It doesn’t feel like going to a doctor, but truly like receiving special care just like humans do when they go into physical therapy, acupuncture, massage, you name it.

Plus, he’s up at Lake Tahoe – a portal itself to assist with his soul needs and things he is choosing.

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Also, the timing of his appointment last week aligned perfectly with his new orthopedic bed I got him, arriving right when I got back from his session. So he was able to stay in that healing, comfy zone from start to finish.

This was also aligned with us being here, because although we could order things and have them shipped to us where ever we were, it had to be timed out just right to ensure arrival while we were some place.

So being here, enabled me not only to get his new bed, but also a new Amethyst Biomat that I’ve been wanting for a long time, which was now able to be shipped and received to where we are. This provides “deep penetrating heat of Far Infrared Rays, Negative Ion therapy, and healing properties of Amethyst” to assist with joint pain, stiffness, muscle pain, arthritis, back pain, and has calming, healing benefits, providing peace and support for body, mind, and soul.

The Biomat will also be woven into Cosmo’s at-home therapy, and of course mom and dad will be using it too.

We have another appointment this week for him and so I’m happy to be able to provide routine, consistent care for a while and am so pleased to keep finding and creating more ways to support his special needs as an incredible soul in an aging rabbit body who is just a wonder to behold.

I’m reminded of how his foster family didn’t want to invest the time and energy into his needs and had felt putting him to sleep was the best option. Hence, the urgency of the woman at the organization that placed him in his foster home, to find someone asap. No one wanted to take him on, or perhaps no one was meant to, but me.

He and I are definitely connected because like Joy and Nestor, he was able to telepathically connect with me and send out a call for help, which I answered in an even more mysterious and profound way. And because of that and knowing I was meant to follow the promptings I felt, this amazing soul in rabbit body with spinal injury, major arthritis, enlarged heart, and inability to walk, had his life extended two years, so far, and still going at 10 1/2 years old.

I shared about how Cosmo and I magickally came together in my very first post about him coming into my life, but here is an excerpt from that as a reminder:

How did this all come about? Well, I would say magickally. I’ll share a little on why.

I mentioned in earlier posts how rabbit energy has increasingly been showing up and due to several dreams, I knew that I wanted to do more for rabbits, as they are so dear to my heart. I do already have an amazing little one, Joy, who is a powerful healer and potent being all around. And I have had two other bunnies in my life, including the magickal Nestor.

After the dreams I knew I wanted to be more active in helping rabbits, so I started volunteer work at a local rescue just a few minutes from my house. Rabbit energy continued to expand and envelope my life from there. Then one day, a week and a half ago, a friend tagged me in a post on Facebook from another rabbit rescue in Los Angeles, Bunny World Foundation.

They had just come into receiving two infant rabbits that were in need of care, with a traumatic story as to how they were now there on their own without mother and two siblings that are no longer on this physical plane.

My friend, like most people, knows that I’m a bunny person, or crazy rabbit lady😉 I constantly see posts like these and normally I will focus my action in sending healing energy, but for some reason I felt compelled to contact the organization and offer even more direct help. I felt drawn to care for them to help them get strong and healthy so they could then be adopted. I sat there and wrote my email, but hesitated hitting send.

On some level I felt something more from this action I was taking and it was like a soul pause taking a moment to check in on making the definitive decision of responsible commitment on a level I was unaware of consciously, as I’m an all or nothing person. I don’t know the meaning of half a–sing things.

So after a minute or two I finally hit send.

It took a couple of days, but I then received an email from the head of Bunny World Foundation, and the rest unfolded from there.

They had found a woman that specialized in infant care, as the infants needed special tube feeding you have to be trained for, but Lejla (the head of Bunny World Foundation) and I ended up having a long conversation connecting about so many mutual things, including knowing the woman who runs Save A Bunny, where I adopted Joy from. We concluded the call by my saying I’d love to help out in any way I can and asked if there was anything special she needed help with.

And then she told me about Blizzy (named this because he reminded his rescuer person who was caring for him when he came to the Human Society of an Oreo Blizzard). (Of course we know Blizzy soon became Cosmo, more appropriately soul named when he came home with me).

Blizzy was in need of a new foster home, as his current foster family was no longer able to care for him. They’d been looking for the last few months for someone and it was crucial he find a home that week.

And of course, here I come along at the right time….I now know that he had called out to me, just as Joy, Nestor, and Gaia had, and I heard his call.

I will say that, like with all things in my life, there is no randomness about it. I sensed this was something big for me…a mission in fact. And that was reiterated the day I picked him up. On my way out a hawk (one of my major animal totems at this time in my life) was sitting on the light post giving me the support, and on the way home, another. But while driving, a dear friend called that knew I was on my way to get him and she was sending me love and support. I said out loud to her, there was just something about this that I knew was so much bigger and I used the word “mission” to describe it.

And immediately after we got off the phone, a song came on and the words said, “it’s more than just a mission….” and at that exact simultaneous moment, I was just crossing over “Mission St.”

I got chills and knew in my heart everything was in divine grace.

And here is some additional background on Cosmo’s story, which I posted back in August:

Small Acts of Compassion Have Far-Reaching Effects

This “mission,” I refer to as, is many-fold and has come to bright light, is being fully acknowledged, embraced, and actualized in embodiment for me, and anchored in while hiking here upon return to Lake Tahoe. This all manifesting as what I’m focused on and investing my energy into now and future to come.

But THAT is a story unfolding in its own divine timing.

Small Acts of Compassion Have Far-Reaching Effects


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What you may not know about Cosmo is like many other abandoned and neglected animals, he has gone through quite a challenged life and has contributed much to both animals and humans alike. It is those very challenges that aligned him with his path and helped a voice from the voiceless to emerge.

He was dumped at the doorsteps of the Humane Society’s Hollywood Office in a cardboard box with nothing in it and left there with several high risk physical issues that luckily they took care of right away and were able to see him pull through to good health.

Everyone at the Humane Society was overwhelmed by his demeanor, saying he was the sweetest and most loving bunny they had ever met.

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Because of his calm, sweet temperament and loving to be held, he became the new ambassador for the Humane Society International – End Animal Testing Campaign in China, being featured with actress Zhu Zhu – the first Chinese celebrity to ever speak out about animal testing in China.

He never had a real home until now, being moved around to foster families. And it was at his last foster home where his spinal injury took place under unknown circumstances, leaving him unable to walk anymore. He also was diagnosed with a lot of arthritis, an enlarged heart (no surprise there since he is pure, ever-giving love in abundance), and onset of cataracts.

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His foster family wasn’t committed to nor capable of caring for his special needs, including daily bathing, and through divine alignment, that is when I heard his call and we were brought together.

We bonded the moment I held him the first time, recognizing each other immediately. He had a different name then that was not suited for his soul and immediately I received the whisper it would be changed to Cosmo.

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Through patience, commitment, and love, we’ve seen him grow stronger, have huge break-throughs, and in general, but most importantly, come to know he has a forever, loving home. More recently his condition has plateaued and our days are simply filled with making sure he knows only peace and love.

He places complete trust in our bond. We have a relationship that is like child and mother, best friends, soulmates, and spiritual colleagues able to communicate crystal clear through a variety of channels. He is my constant companion.

Now, at almost 10 and a half years old (and a year and 7 months with us already), I am blessed and honored to be able to provide quality care and companionship for Cosmo in his golden years (that’s like 100 in rabbit years), have cherished seeing him experience his first bonding relationship of love and best friend companionship with my now transitioned rabbit, Joy (a first for her too), and have witnessed his gifts flourish, which included standing by proudly while he received his Reiki Master Teacher training from Joy in my presence.

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Through his journey and story I’ve been sharing extensively since his arrival with us, he has continued to be of service to many and an example of living in grace despite challenges.

He has and continues to be one of my greatest teachers on a daily basis and I’m so grateful that I can provide him such deserved peace and harmony in his remaining years and time he chooses to be here.

My life was forever changed in the most dramatic of ways when Cosmo – a name that means the whole Universe (from Cosmos), as well as order, harmony, beauty, completeness – walked into my heart again.

And this is how I see him…whole, complete, and beautifully harmonious, exactly as he is.

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Never take for granted the power of any small act of compassion, as the effects are beyond your mind’s grasp.

A Year in Celebration ~ Cosmo’s Message of Love & Commitment


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I’ve posted so much about Cosmo, his journey, and how he’s awakened the Sacred Mother within me.

Today I want to share a celebration of our one year anniversary, although will be day-long here on the Magick Bus.

One year ago, today, Cosmo came home to live with us. It was unclear at the time what would unfold between him and Joy, as that was the only reason for first fostering before adopting him.

Yet, once I picked him up and he came home, it was clear he’d be staying for good and I trusted it would all work itself out, as it felt meant to be.

The message I feel guided to share today in honor of Cosmo, is about the importance of heart and soul commitment to your animal companions, as if they were your biological children – the ones that are both healthy and that have special needs.

But within that message is also a call of importance for your heart bonds and commitments to ALL of your loved ones and those you hold dear, including yourself.

You can’t afford to spend one more day pushing them and you aside, as today may be your only opportunity to share your love.

During this year I’ve invested my heart, time and energy into giving Cosmo everything possible to provide a quality life, by keeping him happy, healthy, and thriving. Not to mention, support his soul in the best and highest possible way with his path.

And I will continue to do so until our last physical moment together in this life.

There’s not a day, hour, or minute that goes by that I’m not saying “I love you” over and over to my loved ones, but also showing them that love, which means even more.

Dave was just saying a couple of days ago that Cosmo is lucky to have me, as although there are many animal lovers out there, he’s not sure many would do what I do for him. He even included himself in there feeling he wasn’t sure he’d be as capable of doing the kind of job and giving as I invest.

And yet I often say that I’m just as lucky to have him, as he is to have me.

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He helps me always to know what’s most important. It’s not the work I have to complete, the deadlines, the schedules, the ego-driven thoughts of what needs to be accomplished in a day that mean anything.

The most important thing is the love I share with him and the responsibility to caring for this little one and ensuring that it is quality care, without cutting corners because other things get in the way.

Nothing gets in the way of a heart bond and commitment you have – whether that’s just to yourself, your partner, your children, and your animal companion children. You make the time or time will pass you by and so will all of the precious and fleeting moments that are life in its finest.

Although I’ve shared some of the things that are involved in his care, truly it’s like having a newborn baby that will never grow up.

It is round-the-clock care, presence, intuiting, listening and observing, and physical and emotional giving.

I wake up twice a night to check on him, turning him over if he’s fallen on the weak side and can’t get up, bringing him to his food and water and sitting with him until he’s done, or even a middle-of-the-night changing/cleaning.

Then there’s the daytime stuff, which all makes it even more important that I’m a work-at-home mom.

I share that for anyone thinking of taking on a special needs animal.

It’s not something to do as a charity case, because you want to feel good about yourself, or simply because you love animals.

They need special care and if you aren’t willing to provide the kind of care you would to your own flesh and blood child, then maybe allowing someone else who can invest that way would be best.

Or, if you’re ready to commit, then educating yourself and being ready to make life-adjustments is necessary.

ALL of which I love. And I say that with EVERY OUNCE ounce of my being.

The time I spend caring for my little ones is my cherished time…the timeless time…the realness of life…the reason for living to experience that preciousness and purity.

It’s amazing it’s already been a year! My time flies. But it’s been the best year of my life so far.

Thank you Cosmo for the gift of you and the countless and continuous ways you teach me about life and love.

I love you with every breath of life within me.

Quick Happy Bunny Update


So I shared in a previous post that Joy and Cosmo were now fully bonded and that my next step was transitioning Cosmo out of his pen, at this point only for peeing purposes since they are happily best buds.

Before I headed out for the Reiki and Horses retreat I had been slowly doing this for a few days where I’d keep him out all day on towels and pee pads to make sure he was continuing to treat his pee pads as his litter box, just as he’d demonstrated so intelligently and respectfully in other situations.

I mentioned that he would hold his need to urinate and would never do so while I was holding him or had him out exercising and snuggling, until I placed him in his pen on his pee pad and then he would release.

I felt he had connected that his pee pads, since he can feel their difference to the touch, were his litter box, since he’s not been able to use a litter box after his injury.

His foster family mentioned they’d at first gotten a litter box without a side so he could go in it, but then went back to one with a side and didn’t know why they did so, but this trained him out of the box and onto the floor/towels.

Whether that’s accurate or not, doesn’t matter at this point, but he is very smart and he knows what to do. So pee pads are his litter box and I’ve had his hay/litter box cut on the side so he can pull himself in easily to eat, and perhaps maybe at some point he’ll relearn to go only there to pee.

In the meantime, he did awesome those days before I left. I originally thought I’d see if things worked consistently for about a month before getting rid of the pen, but like with most things in my life, that idea got thrown out the window the day after I arrived home.

I instantly got the voice in my head….now’s the time!

And so I completely moved out the pen and his special little baby tub I had to hold him in while cleaning it, rearranged my room back, even did a little bit of shifting/redecorating my shelf energy of crystals and altar, and created open space again.

I then decided the bunnies and I would share my area rug where my chair and desks sit. So half of it has become bunny playland and haven, equipped with layers of yoga mat for extra cushioning and protection, four towels, and four pee pads.

I created a little towel area under the right side of my desk to the right of my feet, as Cosmo likes to rest and sleep there. Here I put the pee pad under the towel to capture anything that might happen, but left it just as towels, as he really likes the feel of them more for cuddling in.

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At first I was still keeping their two hay/litter boxes, as I had to make sure Joy was okay with sharing and switching to one with him.

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It didn’t take long for that, as immediately the two of them jumped into his smaller one and were side by side nuzzling and eating together.

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So, after one day of that, I immediately nixed his small hay box and replaced it with a much larger one they both could fit in fully if they want, with plenty of extra room.

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And I’m happy to say, it, as everything else, has been a huge success.

I ended up revamping things and got them both better little water dishes for their water and goji juice blend I give them, cleaned and cleared things, continue to intuit how I can make anything better, taking cues from them and what works and doesn’t, and now we’re all one big happy rabbit warren family!

I’ve also noticed that he stays so much cleaner now, everything actually stays cleaner, I’m able to help him more easily and constantly throughout the day with a lot of things I won’t go into detail about, and so overall it’s just a huge benefit in every way to all.

Lots of clear space for energy to move now, tons of freedom for all, and so much joy, love, and peace in the room.

The great thing is that Joy can go off into the rest of the house and her living room sanctuary spot whenever she likes and wants some “Joy” time (which she does now and then), but then the two of them can share the rest of the time together here.

But the cool thing is that Cosmo actually honors that half of the carpet and room is for Joy and he stays on his side to give her space. Have I mentioned how incredibly respectful he is? The two of them are amazing!

And the other great thing is that Cosmo is not constrained anymore by boundaries, is able to be with me all day in this capacity, and the two of them are enjoying having a best buddy.

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What’s been so fulfilling and enriching for me is to see the two of them together so happy and loving. I’ve never had two rabbits at the same time…only one at a time, so this is really a beautiful and special experience for me. And I love how much of a cohesive team the three of us are.

The other extremely important and touching thing for me has been seeing how happy Cosmo is with this.

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It’s not something I could have done until they were both ready, so I know there was a timing on that, but to see how even more at peace he is, is such an invaluable gift.

He sleeps more contently, comfortably, and peacefully. He used to always be on alert in the pen and never really looked like he was getting the best sleep or getting comfortable like bunnies can. Now, I see him fully laid out on his side, front paws curled, and completely out in a deep sleep like Joy gets when she sleeps. I actually have to check sometimes if he’s still breathing, he’s that comfortable! He doesn’t stir as much and when I enter the room there isn’t that sense of “I want to get to you, hurry come here to me energy.”

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He is just really, REALLY happy and at peace and like a load has lifted from him that is allowing him to just “be”.

That means the world to me, as I hated having him in the pen since I’ve never believed in cages and any constraints for the bunnies being necessary. And loving my own freedom, I want to create the same for them. In this case it was for his own protection and his condition, but I’m so grateful that we were able to get to this place we’re at now and am only looking forward from here.

I also know that life is fragile and the idea of something happening to him while he was in the pen made me so upset. And so I think part of the immediate pen removal when I got back from this weekend, was my connecting more deeply to my essence and reflecting that for him, wanting him to be in the freedom of his essence too, and always.

Every time I look at him, he’s just so content. And so I am so content.

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And everyday he’s taking things to another level, as I’ve just started noticing that he’s pulling himself more fully into his hay/litter box and seems to be starting to learn he can do his thing in there instead of the pee pads. So we’ll see!!

Joy may be teaching him this again, since she is using the litter box they share, and he remembers how it used to be.

He’s such a good, intelligent, and caring boy. I’m so blessed to have him with us.

And although right now he is experiencing some different challenges with his spinal condition, the only thing that I’m focused on is ensuring he is loved beyond words, supported in his most joyous self, is surrounded with peace, and is the happiest and healthiest I can possible help him to be.

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Thank you Joy for welcoming Cosmo into your heart and taking him under your wing. Your loving support and courage is a beautiful example for him.

And Cosmo, thank you for sharing your compassion, love, and your strength with Joy, as she has truly shifted so much upon your arrival into our lives.

I’m beyond the word love when it comes to these two.

A Gift of the Cosmo(s) ~ Awakening the Sacred Mother Within


tania and cosmo (1)It’s hard to say just who is receiving the most from this union between my newly adopted bunny and myself, as it has been both a flow of giving and receiving in equally enriching, but different ways.

Since Cosmo has come into my life, things have definitely shifted, not just in the day-to-day routine, but in my inner realm, as well as with the dynamics at home.

But first, an update on the little Cosmic bunny….he continues to thrive and makes strides all the time. I never know what I’ll see next, as it’s a surprise each day what will evolve from his journey.

He’s currently receiving a combination of therapies that include:

 

  • Out-of-home acupuncture and a non-invasive, non-painful technology called Veterinary Orthopedic Manipulation or VOM that provides an alternative, non-surgical approach to spinal disorders and lameness (a hand held device called a spinal accelerator or activator that delivers its force to the subluxated vertebra thereby reducing the subluxations by providing motion into the fixated or subluxated joint and by taking pressure off the spinal nerve) – especially safer for a very tiny, delicate bunny body than regular chiropractic physical adjustments
  • Along with at-home therapies including crystal healing, Reiki massage, and physical therapy of leg extensions and 6-10 runs on his 8-foot therapy ramp

And like with any healing process, he has some excellent, exciting moments, and then some just normal days where not much new shows up. However, the excellent moments indicate to me that things are shifting, and there is hope indeed to keep fueling!

On the 3rd (the day before the Full Blood Moon Solar Eclipse) was an example of one of those excellent days, which was mirrored again yesterday. Cosmo suddenly started laying on his opposite side (the side he normally stays away from doing so because it’s painful). And he stayed laying on it for a couple of hours, which also enabled him to sprawl out in an extended, relaxed position that allowed him to sleep so sound and comfortably.

cosmo3This was so sweet to see because normally he sleeps in a partially upright position on one side and his head just kind of falls as he falls asleep. So to see him all sprawled out and looking so comfy made me so happy. And then he would get up and go eat on his own, able to sit up properly and move around like a bunny without an injury and then back to sleep all sprawled out again.

He did this again yesterday, as I mentioned, directly after I gave him a long Selenite Crystal healing with Reiki session, as he fell asleep on my chest.

I’ve had to have the vet give him a sanitary shave on the right side where he lays because his fur had become so badly matted and nothing I did was helping at this point. I’ve never had to handle a situation like this, so every day is a learning curve and now I have a new regime of extra care in place to ensure no more matting takes place. (This happened/happens because he lays on one side all of the time, due to pain, and pees on himself. Even as much as I changed out pee pads and washed him, he’d already had too long of a build up from before he’d come to me.)

With the help of my friend Kelly, I got a couple of new products to try, once his hair grows back, to implement along with the daily brushing after each bath and drying. This is a combo of “Static Shmatic” all natural spray to use with brushing, and Lumino Diatomaceous Earth to keep the areas dry in between. But, since I am at home with him daily, I change out his pee pads every time he pees, and bathe and blow dry him every morning.

The staining you see on his lower body in the photo is normal, due to urine, but eventually when he’s better, this will go away in time when he’s not laying on that side all the time. It’s the same with paws.

Most bunnies you see have yellow paws because they are kept in cages and stand/sit/sleep in urine, but Joy has no urine staining whatsoever because she is free to roam, is potty trained, and I have a special, gentle screen that sits on her litter, so she isn’t soaking in pee while she eats her hay, and doesn’t hurt her delicate feet either.

Cosmo’s fur has actually become much brighter than when he first came to me and he is so much more vibrant in spirit in general.

Every night I also give Cosmo a Reiki massage up and down his spine and on his legs. The few times I haven’t been able to, I immediately see the difference in his ramp runs, directly done after. He will drag the painful leg more and not use it normally at all. But when I massage him, as I did last night with him falling asleep on my chest like a little baby again, he does really well.

And last night was one of the amazing days where he was running, using both legs nearly equally, and wouldn’t fall over at the ends. He was able to do this last night the whole time he ran his 8 runs. Sometimes I see just a burst of good leg use in the first 2 or 3 runs before he tires, but all of his runs were really strong last night.

And recently, he had another really awesome night where I didn’t have to pick him up and turn him around to get on his ramp at the end each time. He actually was able to do that all on his own and followed my voice, as I called to him to meet me on the other end! Incredible.

These bursts come and go, but they are all super promising, and along with his great appetite and a lot of loving encouragement and extra double time I’m starting to devote more to his Crystal and Reiki massages (as they really seem to benefit him greatly along with the rest), I am super encouraged we’re getting a good momentum going for something bigger eventually.

Since he’s only been here for 2 and a half months, I think that’s pretty excellent progress nonetheless!

And along the way, what I’ve noticed is that it’s not just about this healing journey that we’re partnering in, but it’s about so much more!

Joy is doing really awesome with him and there has not been any fighting or agitation between them at all. We still take it all slowly and never leave them unattended together without separation, as I can tell that my encouragement and sometimes placing a Crystal with them helps, but there seems to be a peace truce and mutual respect developing. In the process, Joy has also come to like being held so much more, which is an added gift bonus!

She lets me pick her up easily now when I transport her for bonding time back and forth, or just when I move her while cleaning in my office, and she also enjoys just cuddling for a while with mom before she decides its time to explore and she doesn’t seem to have the panic she used to have. So she’s definitely seeing from watching me with Cosmo, that bunnies don’t always have to have their ultra defense mechanisms on when someone loving them is tenderly connecting.

That’s a huge deal for any bunny (let alone Joy, whom like my Nestor, has always had issue with this) that has that fight or flight, prey-fear conditioned in them on such a deep level. And that’s not to mention, what ever other personal stuff they each have gone through or how they’ve been treated in the past, or simply how freedom loving they are.

But wait…it’s not just about the bunnies and their amazing evolutionary journeys, but it’s about what mom is receiving too, not to mention all the people and other animals they have touched and inspire along the way – love hearing those stories. ❤

That brings me to the title of this post, “Awakening the Sacred Mother Within”.

As mentioned when I began, we have both received in enriching ways from this union. My life, while lovely and blessed, got an extra infusion of specialness when Cosmo came into it. There is never an end to the expansive ways our lives can be touched, deepened, and enchanted.

Although I will never be a mother in the sense of birthing my own child, nor have the desire to, Cosmo has truly awakened that Sacred Mother within me in a very new way.

I don’t believe one has to actually birth a child from their womb to have this experience, although it definitely is one of the very rich ways to know this aspect of self as reflection of our Earth Mother’s own blessings in this regard. But, nor would one necessarily need to have any form of children to know this part of a woman that simply IS due to her being a woman.

The alchemy of the Sacred and Divine Feminine and Mother is an innate essence for us to remember is within us and to embody, reawaken, activate, and bring that forth in shining glory without shame, guilt, fear, or judgment. We can awaken it through the act of self-love, through the channeling of creativity and nurtured passion, through sacred ritual, through our sexuality and sexual alchemy, and through the intimacy of relationship to all that is within the deep recesses of our most ancient, rich, inner mysteries.

That said, I have experienced another level to my own Sacred Feminine and Mother with this union between Cosmo and I. I have explored the many other ways, and continue to deepen those experiences, to deepen my own personal relationship to this aspect of myself. But it wasn’t until Cosmo that I have had the chance to truly know the aspect I hadn’t explored, which is that of this mother to baby relating and connection that he has invoked.

While I have, and had, other animal companion children, and they indeed were and have been cared for like my children, they’ve been more like partners, best friends, and co-facilitators in my life. Cosmo, while he is his own magickal soul with gifts still revealing themselves to me that will come more into play soon, and is another dear soul friend, he truly is the only one I feel is my “baby”.

I have many nicknames for all my little ones that constantly shift, but he’s the only one I say “my baby” to.

The dynamic is different. And in his embrace of his role, I am able to embrace my own.

Now, of course I’m in a human body, but a very much larger part of me is much not human in several regards. One of which is my identification with animals, since I’ve been one so many times. My brother actually, since I was young, has always called me an animal and referred to my hands and feet as paws. LOL!

But all silliness aside, for me, it feels as if he truly is a baby I’ve birthed. And likely we have that connection from a time removed from this particular, focused period of time, but it’s there. I have these instincts where he is concerned that I know is like that of a mother and baby that goes beyond just our soul companion connection.

And every moment I get to spend with him, even if it’s the rigorous routines others might tire from, I am thoroughly enraptured with, loving any time I can spend with him especially holding him close to my heart on my chest and helping to soothe his pains. I feel like I’m exactly where I need to be, time stands still, I don’t feel I need to do anything else, and actually would be happy just taking care of him.

I love bath time and I love holding his hand when I take him in to his appointments, reassuring him I’m right there. I love waking to see how he did in the night, and I can’t wait to see him when I return home from anywhere, feeling sad to leave him, but also knowing the separation is good for growth and expanding on our telepathic connection.

And if you see us in the afternoons and evenings, when he lays cradled in my arms and falls asleep on my chest as I give him his Reiki and Crystal massages or even just cuddle him, you’d swear you were seeing a mother holding her newborn after nursing, or just putting their baby to sleep for a much needed nap, the way he looks just like a baby against my chest with his little hands and head safely cushioned by the warmth of my skin.

I feel like the only time Cosmo really sleeps best is when we’re cuddling, and he can relax and feel nurtured. And guess what? He’s nurturing me right back.

He’s helped to bring another layer of balance to my life, connection with my inner child AND inner mother, and softened, as well as strengthened the abilities I have to share with him and others – all adding to the layers of richness I’m experiencing opening to in my life in bigger ways right now on many levels.

With his added presence, my own presence is shifting and much is being supported to birth into being from this Sacred Womb of Creation within me that is being nurtured, embraced, enjoyed, honored, and celebrated.

It is also this time period where much of my innate gifts have been revealing themselves more and much more of my natural essence is deepening.

There’s simply a greater sense of knowingness that comes in knowing myself as a reflection and extension of our Earth and Cosmic Mother.

The energy I feel aligns very much with the sacred tattoo design I posted, “The Cosmic Dance” that is awakening the great healer and creator within me – the essence we all have innately within each of us.

Cosmo has such a beautiful, clear, yet enigmatic male energy, which also has been new to me to partner with in terms of an animal companion. He has a dynamic energy, vibrant, huge all-seeing starry eyes, very alert ears and senses, a courageous heart, powerful action force (we call him the human torpedo the way he bursts through his ramp run with energetic gusto), has a strong presence and will fight for himself, and yet is tender and love-expressive with constant velvet licks and kisses, and the desire to be close and snuggle his head on and under you. When he’s excited, he falls all over himself, twists and rolls on his back, wiggles like a worm, and can’t get to you soon enough. Nothing will stop him from what moves him with excitement and what he wants to create! He wriggles through and through with eternal rhythm like that of liberating and fiery Shiva.

I love having two magickal bunnies in the physical with me, and a third watching over us. And am ever-grateful for what all of them gift me in their own special ways.

This newest gift of a more profound experiential Sacred Mother embodiment has been such a blessing that along with the tremendous shifts I’ve experienced with my recent sacred journeys, and from the support of all the new Crystal friends, elixirs, and new energy channeling through me, has indeed been like a transmutational rebirthing all culiminating near, on, and around my actual birthday this year.

Just when you thought you had received so much, you receive some more. 🙂 Thank you for this dance, Cosmo.

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