Inspired by a friend who has been moving through some of the challenges that this Cancer Full Moon has presented, along with working through the integrating of important pieces that “the now” asks of us to do (especially the visionaries who will be showing up strong in the world at this time) I am sharing a few perspectives I did with her, at her suggestion.
She was curious (curiosity by the way is a very empowering and healthy first step, as it stops you from auto reaction and helps you to be present, step back, and to ask the questions that will lead to a conscious response instead) if she would have to fix a long-term challenge she has experienced with a family member in order to be able to move forward with her life and new things she is creating.
In essence, this is how I responded, which is the way I approach my own life, finding much success with it when I experience similar:
Yes, there is something there that does need to be addressed, integrated and processed in order to assist healing, but no, it does not control you, as that can be a way to sabotage yourself. To put so much power into something/someone outside of yourself is debilitating. It puts us in a perpetual victim role and gives our ego an excuse to feed its fears.
There are patterns there to address indeed, and to understand. Finding a way to step back non-judgmentally and with peaceful embrace, understanding the perfection of the roles being played out in the story of your chosen life. Recognizing and putting closure to patterns and how they emotionally affect you and why, seeing the triggers, and being present to recognize when and how they crop up and learn how to process and maneuver in a healthier and conscious way is key. We are conditioned from experience to quickly and rashly react without stepping back to ask the right questions to ourselves, nor to try to understand the dynamics and see through the other person’s eyes. Learning to unconditionally step outside, while simultaneously honoring what you and the other person ARE feeling presently, is something that takes practice.
When we use the word, “fix,” or say something needs to be “fixed” we are stating that something is in need of fixing and is wrong and this creates a judgment, which is part of polarity thinking – black/white, right/wrong. While something may be unproductive and non-responsible to persist and unhealthy, there are reasons and agreements that have brought these experiences into being in order to teach us things and provide the tools for our soul’s evolution that we chose. Those souls who present us the most challenge in our lives, are some of our greatest teachers presenting us opportunities for growth. So our challenges are the perfect ones we chose to set up for ourselves to teach what we desire most to learn in this life. We also have choice in how we choose to perceive and process what takes place, but this can more easily be done when we are more presently conscious with ourselves.
At any moment, we have the power to choose a different experience. We can learn to stop feeding the emotional addictions we all have and to nurture our authentic emotional well being and empowerment, realizing nothing has the power over us that we do not agree to give that power to. The instant we truly recognize this can create a powerful shift instantly and along with learning to shift your conditioned behaviors and relearn how to be more in your essence, will help move you into a new experience towards the life you want to create.
My feeling on “being healed” of something completely is this: I’m not certain that that we actually completely heal something. My sense is that we are constantly in process of becoming master of our ingenious souls and this involves learning how to integrate things, embrace them, and process them differently so they do not become perpetual issues that block us completely. We learn to flow more naturally with things and to peel the layers to our core authenticity while we journey through the cycles of life and discover new evolutionary opportunities that will continually arise in different forms and ways. Unconditionally seeing outside of polarity thinking and understanding a bigger picture of unlimitedness operating alongside this learned polarity is powerful. To see life as an opportunity, rather than a challenge, and challenges as gifts, gifts as keys…then we more easily flow through life’s doors with intuitive precision, rather than feel like we are searching in the dark, tripping, falling, hitting things…on our way to desperately find the doorknobs. When we learn how to process and integrate one thing, there will be something new…that is the labyrinth of life and evolution. And you choose the way you walk the path.