I won’t be blogging on my birthday, which is this Monday 2/26, so I thought I’d share some thoughts in a post, today, on this nine year anniversary of Joy’s arrival into my life – one of the greatest birthday gifts to date! Although age is meaningless to the eternal spirit, it IS interesting to reflect on all of the judgments and ideas we have around age, which also deters people from humanly acknowledging it, as well as determines life protocol for many to try to reverse it or even speed it up. Although, I’ve never taken issue to stating my age, I have been guilty of all of these things in my past.
In fact, rather than be afraid of or feel protective of my age to the degree of feeling it is no one’s business, I was quite the opposite, where I was adamant to share my age because I could feel the judgments of others upon me and my insecurity around that to blast through their ideas about me. In part, this was my own projection, but being an intuitive, it was largely in response to knowing what people were thinking, and wanting to nip that in the bud immediately.
I recall having meaningful conversations with people in my past and knowing by my outside appearance and things they alluded to, like asking what school I was going to (when in fact I was way past high school and college age) and the way they looked at me in a protectively patronizing way, that they weren’t taking me seriously. Coming from a past of “feeling the need to prove myself” anyway, this of course was my perfect experience called up to move through that.
But, at the time, it just made me want to blurt out how old I was because I knew the connotations attached to age that obviously I was buying into, too, as a sensitive and boundary-less Pisces. So, rather than hide my age, I wore it on my sleeve. And perhaps that might run deeper than simply this, as I also knew the ancient aspects of spirit and to come back again on Earth, starting all over, might even feel demeaning.
Although I know it is a gift and meaningful choice, now, there would definitely have been unconscious anger or resentment over incarnating – an experience locked deep in our DNA, I feel, as a whole, for many reasons.
And so, there I was fighting back with announcing my age, to appease my feelings that not only in fact what I had to say was meaningful and important, but my incarnating here had purpose I was trying to remind myself with this declaration.
I’m not sure if I’m conveying this in the depth of potency it has, but in realizing and understanding this, it made a huge shift and got more parts of myself aligned and on board, rather than having an internal fight against myself, which only adds to the depletion of self love and creates more fragmenting and less empowerment.
The greatest battle and ongoing war, is truly the one within and I believe it stems from so much subconscious anger at our humanness.
And this made sense, as I always felt more inhuman and thus laid ahead a journey of merging and a return to natural harmony.
Then there was the young me wishing I was older and wanting to race through the years as fast as I could because I not only knew my younger years would be the hardest, but I also soulfully knew it wasn’t until later, in my mid-forties, that I would find my peace and really start “living.” A cruel form of intuitive vision when you know you STILL have to go through the years to get there. Yet, I wanted to escape, as much as I knew I couldn’t.
And still yet, there was the me who bought into these ideas of physically reversing age. Mind you, not in any fanatical way, but I was aware of ways in which one could “look” their best and all of those catch phrases even in the spiritual community that are about longevity, reversing the clock, ways one “should” look or how life should look if you are “ascending,” and what you “should” be able to do and accomplish if you are in fact turning back the sands of time.
I still marvel at this messaging and collective-buy-into, today, and although I understand aging is not a spiritual attribute, we are still on a three dimensional planet, we do still have individual journeys that are not measured by a certain amount of time we need to be here, and we are still judging what something looks like and associating it with living a life that’s “less than” if in fact it doesn’t fit into what collectively we see as “ideal” and “vibrant”. Just another form of self-abuse masked as spiritual enlightenment.
Are there things you can do to reverse physical appearance? Sure, but if in fact you are healthy, happy, and aligned in your expression of you, why then does that matter here on Earth?
If I want to have silver hair or wrinkles, why does that automatically mean I’m deficient? Or that there’s something wrong? I am still part human, and that part isn’t necessarily what I’ve chosen to walk in forever. Perhaps these indicate my true eternal quality? Why is there only one way to characterize this or see it?
There isn’t just one way, and I feel that the faster we open ourselves to multiple perspectives and possibilities, the faster we will free ourselves into a more grace-filled way of being and come into our multi-dimensionality.
Why do I bring this up?
Well, for one, I feel that vulnerability and transparency are powerful and key things to bring forth into our lives in greater frequency right now. Something I just shared yesterday on my Facebook feed with these reflections:
Everything points to going deeper into our hearts and connecting through them, with these as the guiding forces. The more we nurture these within, the more we encounter empowered embodiment, authentic experiences, connections, clarity, and alignment in our manifestations. And, the less we encounter triggers, hidden surprises, and forced change or reaction to what is revealed in the collective environment.
I feel that being vulnerable and transparent isn’t so much about allowing everything to bombard us as it pleases, but involves also a healthy balance of knowing and exercising our boundaries. This isn’t about hiding or repressing ourselves, however, but about knowing how to say “no” and not allowing certain frequencies to shift our own. Being openly expressive is not draining in this vein, but empowering and helps increase vitality. What is draining is when we fight our true expression or are having to deal with unwanted energies. Vulnerability and transparency is being willing to share the truth in our hearts and this helps others not to be afraid to do the same too. Fear around this is draining our energy, as we use so much of it to hide, worry, or create walls, which inhibit our gifts to shine through.
We can all shine, regardless of age, physical appearance, the list of accomplishments you have, or the things you own in your life.
The way I’ve discovered doing this is to live life out loud and to “create life as a work of art” – my motto.
I share the photo above, as it is the most recent photo of me (a week old) that reflects a much more peaceful, harmonious, grounded, embodied, softer, more secure, gently joyful, balanced, and creatively passionate me.
Vibrant bursts of color reflect my soul song frequency and inspire creativity to bubble through. Perhaps it’s the artist me or perhaps I’m simply inspired by Nature and how she exudes life force in every shade of beauty possible. Her blossoming myriad of expressions sing of love.
She is a woman of my heart and the only example I take to heart of how to live in the grace of being.
I love that now I have no emotional trigger or any tiny weirdness around my human expression and emanation of my spirit.
I will still always have resonance to otherworlds, but no longer need to prove that, nor anything else about my being here the way I choose to show up, as once my younger Earthly self felt she needed to do.
Merging embrace of my multi-dimensional self allows me the ability to enjoy each different aspect for what ever they are and however I am choosing to express them, without attachment.
They are ALL me and as the artist me, and using the power of creative love through me, I know their intrinsic beauty and value in the spiral of consciousness.
I now walk this reality as alive as ever, because it is my canvas to create in the reflection of my essence and my playground for exploration and total freedom of how I want to share that in any given moment.
Although chronological age is not important, the numerology factor is still interesting and revealing to explore.
45 is a combination of the energy of 4, 5 and their combined total of 9.
4 builds solidity and stability, foundations for self and others, draws forth passion and drive together for achieving success (whatever that means to you), and 5 adds personal freedom, adventure, creativity, courage to explore unknowns, letting imagination go free, versatility, major life shifts through lessons learned, while 9 brings things full circle, adds patience, intuition, soul mission, inner strength, sense of personal responsibility, humanitarianism, global focus, living and leading by example, and spiritual enlightenment.
These feel to be the energies I’m integrating at this time of my life and the foundations of where I am and where I’m headed.
I read that 45, numerologically, has a focus on putting your efforts and energy towards the things in your life that enhance and fully embody who you truly are – from the smallest of things to the largest of things – what we surround ourselves with, what we wear even, the things we focus on and are working on bringing into the world, and our lifestyle choices and overall life in general. It’s also about really putting things into full-embodied action so results manifest, keeping focused, and integrating a more pragmatic way to be a guiding force.
I’m also going to be igniting a 12/3 year come my birthday and this speaks to the creative rebirth taking place for me, an inner calling surfaced, release from all karmic ties, and everything coming together in my life story as I reach a significant stage on my journey.
So, while I may have been wanting to fast forward things in my younger years, I can understand why that visionary part of me was looking forward to now, as this truly is the most full-circle time of my time here on Earth – this life and aspect of my multi-dimensional self – and the most peace-filled.
There is peace no matter what today or tomorrow brings, as there is peace right here and now in my heart.
My new thing in recent years has been to gift myself birthday gifts to not only celebrate the new energy with supportive things that light up my heart, but to celebrate all that I’ve gone through to be here.
This year seemed to start a few months early, as truly wonderful birthday gifts were received from friends, loved ones, and family far before now, and some incredible surprises along the way that truly touched my heart.
So many of them were rabbit-focused and went along with the theme of my Wonderland office, with Alice in Wonderland fun.
My favorite gifts-to-self include the colorful, handmade shawl you see me wearing in the photo, two necklaces (including an incredibly magickal rabbit and a powerful “origins” and DNA activator), another gorgeous Faery book (I gifted myself one last year too), a custom made pen (for the writer me), a custom made wand (for the ancient me), and a “crown” chakra headpiece I’ve had intention of for years, but took until now to draw in the perfect one. Seems appropriate.
I don’t have any particular plans this year on my birthday, so we’ll see what intuitively and organically shows up, but we will be embarking on a super fun adventure March 7th – 17th, which feels to be my birthday journey of origins and more.
We’ll be heading to Arizona, first spending 3 days with Dave’s family in Tucson and then heading up to the Grand Canyon to meet up with our sweet friends you’ve heard me mention in past Summer posts – KC, aka Bean, and Clint, aka Happy. My Faery and Elf friends who returned my two giant quartz to their momma after my foot fracture and who took me on a Cirrus G6 private flight over Lake Tahoe.
From there, we head into the GC for an epic trekking and camping adventure, to introduce the energy and magick of this realm to us. Well, more me, because Dave has been inside of the GC before, but I haven’t. I’ve only explored the rim. Nor have I ever done this kind of trek, as I only camped a tiny bit when I was a little girl. Our adventures have been limited, but oh-so not limiting, to the Magick Bus RV living.
But come March, Bean and Happy (who will be working in the GC starting a week after our adventure, are GC experts, and love her inside and out) will be sharing her with us through their eyes, as we venture into her mysteries for several days. This will be an intro only, as we couldn’t do a super long trek this go-around, so more will definitely have to come once we sink our feet into the Earth here.
The reason I said this will be a journey of origins and more has to do with the ancient Earth here and the energy, which I know will be activating for me and synchronizes with my origins theme, because apparently there are hidden Egyptian temples that predate Egypt by 7000 years tucked safely away in the canyon walls for only certain eyes to see (this info coming to me all at once from several sources). Regardless of actually seeing them, the energy will be there and this connects more dots with why I felt so compelled to go on this trip, why it fell into place so seamlessly (including super challenging permits they were able to get for us for it), and ties into that Africa energy (which I’ve had more interesting dots light up with other connections too, since those posts).
A “Grand” birthday/new year/kick off indeed!
However, the greatest gift is this storybook year for me, and that my book’s completion and manifestation is close at hand and along with writing it, I’m writing a new reality into being from my heart.
I’m so grateful for every chapter of this story of life and that you have all been willing to colorfully show up and play in it with me, through the fun and challenge, and through the mystery and adventure of it all.
There’s been a rainbow sprite sighting on the Tahoe Rim Trail (TRT). Keep your eyes open for mischief and magick in the High Sierra. You never know who or what you might see.
And what you might get yourself into and discover by walking with a light foot and heart through it all….and life.
Because every day should be filled with fun, giggles, mischief, magick, and weeeee! Heart tickles to you from rainbow sprite me!
It’s always a gift to get outside and explore what nature is up to each day. So much incredible discoveries, expansive views, tiny details, and portal potency.
Especially heart warming is getting to see our tree friend whom we helped and nurtured all last winter during the craziest snow fall here in Tahoe. You might remember my posts on him last winter. The huge drifts of snow would come down the mountain on him and had him bent over, highest limbs touching the ground. We’d dig him out every time we passed and give him love. So wonderful seeing him strong and having grown several feet already this year! He’s nearly straight and looks like he’s going to be just fine.
Other trees end up getting uprooted. What was also sweet is that right behind him a new baby tree is growing. I know he’ll take good care of her. The two photos of us each by the tree show how big he’s gotten. When it was my turn to get my photo with him I started walking toward him and tripped on a bush or root buried in the snow. We felt he wanted me there from that perspective, but also wanted to have a little fun with me. So we took the photo of me after my fall looking up at his beauty. That photo is above.
And below is the world of wonder as seen through a sprite’s eyes.
At the end of the day, it’s not how much you have or have accomplished that matters, but how much more your heart opened. Nature helps mine expand and deepen daily more than I thought possible. If you feel your heart tight like a bud or wilted and hurting in some way, let nature in. She has a way of touching the hardest to reach places and bringing a warm smile where you thought you never could feel again.
To the reflection I see in you…..each and every one of you:
I honor your blossoming journey and the sweet fragrance of your soul.
Every day your delicate petals unfurl a little bit more, revealing the essence of who you are.
What do you see when you peer deeply to the core of you?
I see an angel recognizing their reflection for the first time and awakening into the embodiment of that grace.
Every day is opportunity to deepen into recognition and reverence of the individual journey… the unique frequency signature of each soul, and the beauty and richness that diversity brings to our lives and our growth.
Within each soul seed lies unlimited potential for expansion and creative enrichment within and without.
Let us sink gently into our hearts so that we may soften our relationship with ourselves, others, our animal brothers and sisters, Earth’s gardens, the here and beyond.
There is no threat to an open heart…only more love to be discovered beyond the lines you’ve chosen not to cross.
One of the creeks behind our house is frozen over about half way down so you can walk across it and see the pockets of translucency and density. For some reason this brings to mind the questions of how we can be more compassionate and sensitive in handling very sensitive matters with others? How we can fine tune the balance of mindfulness and heart in understanding the individual journey and what it truly means to embody something unconditionally? No matter what spectrum of beliefs, ethics, and virtues we hold, it seems that the tendency is to make others wrong and to fight, ridicule, point fingers, assert our righteousness, or hurt others in effort to make them like us. This appeases the ego, but doesn’t take into account temperance of the heart. The ice cracks and the gap between greater connection and understanding widens. The anchor disappears, the bridge collapses, and with that the opportunity dissipates for seeding possibility of expanding our journey. When we remove compassion in its full embodiment, we increase the likelihood of disconnect and growth for everyone involved with the fostering of a deafening ear. There is something to learn from every point on the spectrum. Perhaps the next time we find ourselves “walking on thin ice” we can sink deeper into our hearts and ask ourselves the harder questions as to how we are living the example of our convictions.
(Reposting this from my Instagram page. I love what one friend reflected in addition…how the image of the ice looks like the surface of the Moon and mirrors the micro/macrocosm)
Every day is a gift, each moment is an adventure unfolding, and every breath is an opportunity for expansion. It’s been an incredible journey with surprises around every corner and most recently, surprises discovered in our own backyard. We haven’t yet moved into our new magickal dream house, but we visit each day to manage remodeling, care for our new trees, and when time allows, explore a bit of our enchanted forest garden. I’d made promises to the Faeries to work with the energy here and in turn they opened the doors for this house to manifest and have sprinkled hidden treasures to uncover along the way.
I’ve already begun to plant some seeds of new in our front yard for the Faeries, which include five daffodil and five iris bulbs that were gifted to me by Faery sis Laura. If all goes well, they’ll be blooming once the snow thaws, bringing enchantment and color to the entrance of our home, lined along the large trees and Manzanita where I felt called to place them. As mentioned, an earth worm showed up while I was doing so, which felt like an affirmation of placement and gratitude.
We’ve been starting to work on a few changes to the area just outside my new office as well, and have been dream journeying with ideas for the yard there that will become a Magick Sanctuary that will at some point include a labyrinth and more. A work in progress for sure and can’t be started until Spring. For now we are focusing on the inside of the house, as truly the yard is a Nature’s work of art already.
We knew this was a magickal space, sitting on the National Forest with only one house to the right that isn’t on top of us, but also aren’t year-round neighbors, however we continue to discover just what the Faeries had in store for us with guiding us here, as we uncover more of their surprise gifts each day.
Today marks seven weeks since my foot fracture, and I’m no longer wearing my healing boot. I’m now able to wear regular supportive shoes and am moving around well. This has enabled me to start doing some easy hikes and walks, which include the beginning of explorations in our forest backyard.
We have an endless circuit of hiking trails out back that lead all over, including connecting to the Tahoe Rim Trail. I have only walked about a mile so far, but in doing so last week, discovered some treasures!
Not only did the Faeries leave raw quartz directly behind the house and along the trail….gorgeous pieces of pink quartz….but we discovered some very cool things about where the house sits, including having views of Heavenly Mountain Ski Resort.
We are exactly smack middle of two year-round flowing creeks, literally just a quarter of a mile in either direction (we clocked it) and about 3-4 minutes walk. What incredible energy that is having flowing water and the magick of these little Water Nymph areas perfect for this Pisces.
Here’s a short clip of one. The other has a bridge over it. This one has a log bridge over it.
Throughout the trail there are beautiful granite outcroppings of large stones that create sacred areas and energy as well. Some are large and others smaller. In some cases create rings or circles, and in other cases are just deliberately placed and have distinct shapes. I didn’t capture all of these in photos, but this is one of the larger areas.
And to our surprise we have very tiny peeks of Lake Tahoe. Not the full, expansive view of our tree house, but indeed open channels and portals connecting her energy with our home, both seen from the deck and back rooms of the house, and also wider openings along the trail just yards out.
This became extra apparent as we were there at sunset and I saw what appeared like two Suns setting. Then I realized the second was actually the Sun reflecting on the water and I could actually see the waves rippling on the surface of the Lake.
They don’t show up in the photos much, but give you a tiny idea. In person, it’s quite magickal.
I love the streaming of water and light through these little doorways, which creates this incredible portal of flowing energy tying in so many elements here that it’s almost beyond words to describe the feeling of. It just feels perfect, aligned, and definitely meant to be, plus creates a lot more mystery, magick, and mischief!
The dances of light that have been present the last few visits at our home have been revealing too and excite me as to all that will continue to reveal itself when we do in fact live here and what will take place and become possible in creating.
Oh what magick we will weave with secret visitors abound!
I love this video of the light in the yard and if you look closely near the railing you’ll see this magickal little white energy flying through the air and following my movement…then disappear.
Gratitude overflows and excitement builds. Yet patience is my constant partner for all that lies ahead and is unfolding step-by-step.
Life continues to be a journey of trust, loving commitment, and continued dreaming…
This morning’s gift….four deer just below our window spent the morning grazing. An older buck with full antlers, a younger one with little antlers growing, and two females. It was such beauty and grace to watch and such lovely medicine to experience and be messaged with. This same window was where a black bear gave us a show rolling in the snow this past winter. And the deck is where a hawk landed, facing in at me, and so many variety of large and small birds (including eagles) fly by and land, as well as squirrels and chipmunks come play. It’s truly wonderful to experience and I know will continue tenfold at our new home on the forest.
I’ve written before on deer symbolism, which includes so many lovely energies:
love, grace, gentleness, compassion, innocence, peace, beauty, fertility, femininity, humility, swiftness, acceptance, regrowth, renewal, creativity, spirituality, psychic power, subtlety, higher connection, awareness, abundance, benevolence, watchfulness, and is associated with the moon, the dawn, and the easterly directions.
The stag in particular symbolizes the same, but includes masculinity (which brings balance), regeneration, guidance, healing, connection to the Earth and forest, alertness, pride, independence, purification, strength, and nobility.
I thought I would share some of the photos I capture this morning, as I spent about a half hour or more just watching them.
I also found it a beautiful synchronicity, since my dear friend Dawn is visiting and she is very connected to deer medicine as well, having a couple of sacred tattoos of them she wears on her skin, and her blog is in fact called Deer Heart Reiki
We have continued to share some magickal times and sweet moments while she has been visiting. Today she’ll get to meet Astrid and we’ll take in a lovely forest hike before she heads off tomorrow morning, which will be sad, but also just a continuation of the journey and cycles we share.
As I shared, in the coming couple of months we’ll be moving into our new home and this will herald another leap of change in our lives. Of course these involve energetic shifts and openings, but I can literally see how these shifts have evolved and why, even just in terms of the homes we’ve been, and will be, living in. The journey is constantly humbling, as I review the course of my life and experiences that haven’t always been so clear to me, let alone clean and easy. Things are drastically different these days, but that has only been because of a continued commitment to delve deeper and not become complacent. To keep rising out of the ashes and do it another way. These days are times of unveiling and constant stripping away of comfort zones and veils that even the more conscious can easily pull, or have pulled, over themselves.
Everyone is going through a rewiring process and in some cases that leads to a richer and fuller embodiment than ever known, when embraced and implemented. And in some cases this can lead to a “shift or leave” syndrome we keep experiencing with so many departing this Earthly plane of existence.
There’s no right or wrong in this, but simply a choice. We are constantly presented choices, as this is a free will zone.
I definitely don’t do things in any perfected way and definitely have gone through some crazy stuff because I, too, understand the confusing, painful, challenging, and sometimes tormenting energy we have here to deal with.
It is through finding solace within my own voice that I experience peace and find the clarity that guides my way.
And recently that led us back to Lake Tahoe and we found ourselves in this “tree house” or “castle in the sky” at the highest point here being 7500 elevation that overlooks the lake.
It’s as if we physically manifested a realm to literally help us rise above things, to elevate us in this state of being in things, but not of them, so that we could suspend all the “noise” around us and receive clarity on our path….and peace within chaos.
From this place so much has streamed in, inspiration has channeled through, and creative manifestation has been able to take form in an all-encompassing and multi-dimensional way.
After being on the road and deeply immersed in Nature for over a year in the Magick bus, this state of suspension atop the air streams that blew in and all around us, supported an opening to take place that helped sift through all of our thoughts and ideas, so that we could hone in on the most effective and all-fulfilling path for us. It was no surprise to me that this has been during such huge times of shifting and upheaval the collective and Earth is experiencing.
It’s as if the winds that blew through here carried with them the whispers of collective thoughts and beliefs and I was experiencing it all swirl around me, but could then understand from this perspective how they were my choice to either grab from the air and attach to, or continue to allow them to stream by with gratitude for their reflection.
It is here that I completed the story that my book shares.
It is during our remodeling and transition phase that I edit it now.
And it will be in the new home where completion anchors and expands into the next phase.
We will be going from this elevated point that enabled expansive vision of sky and water (and review of multi-perspectives and potentials) to support our process….to a 900 feet drop in elevation to 6600 feet that will be rooting us into the abundant and mysterious forest for the next phase.
We’ll still be remaining at very high altitude, as this is where I thrive and feel most me, but with a new support system that will integrate the energy more (Earth and Cosmos as One), as well as deepen the creative inspiration into manifestation.
We’re dropping down a bit to merge with Nature more, rather than hover in the air above it. This also merges us back into things at large more too. And, it will bring us within closer proximity to getting to the lake for our water connecting – could even bike or walk there if we really wanted, or drive within minutes. Feels like the perfect happy medium for us at this stage and the seclusion and magick of the forest feels to nurture with the sense of sanctuary now desired.
I’ve also seen this shift take place with the plant friends I’ve surrounded myself with, which has grown since living here. I went from having only one plant on the Magick Bus (after I gifted away my mini garden I had at first to my friend in Montana), to now having seven little lush worlds with tons of plant beings in these magickal Faery gardens I’ve created to infuse my life with expansive energy.
The same has happened with crystal friends too. I had so very little crystals, after nearly all moving on in the time before leaping onto the Magick Bus, which continued when arriving here, but then had a small influx of new crystal beings coming in to support the creation of this new space and infuse our environment with the perfect energy needed. Some I felt were working in the now and others working in the new space that only existed in the ethers and would become anchors there once that timeline came into being.
I still have very very few crystals, especially considering I once lived in a crystal cave when I first moved out on my own to my space at the north end of Tahoe. But the few with me now are very deliberate and are shared between Astrid and myself, as well as support our family as a whole. And since we’re preparing to move, most are boxed right now except for a few in the space to support the change.
You’ve already seen Astrid’s Dendritic Opal and Rose Quartz Towers, so I’m only sharing the ones I haven’t yet. I haven’t posted much on crystals lately, but know that so many of you love them and enjoy shares on them. I have mentioned how many crystals I never had a huge draw to have come into my experience now, and so you’ll see some of those here.
The ones I’ve kept out for now are what you see in the photos here, which include my male and female Labradorite unicorns, a Lapis Lazuli fish, a Goldstone rabbit, an incredible Ocean Jasper sphere with portals and amazing naturally infused sacred circles in perfect geometric synergy throughout (hard to capture, but you can kind of see one of these in the photo), and this incredible Fluorite.
The Fluorite is like nothing I’ve seen and truly embodies the essence of my focus – merging Earth and Cosmos – as the bottom half is this exquisite layered journey through Earth’s womb in the brown and the top half is this ethereal experience of violet and white. Within each there are remnants of both interlaced, creating balance. And then we find sparks of rainbow and one larger one at top.
I just love it and knew immediately it was to come home and mirrored the journey I have been, and will continue, on.
Harmony within and without. 11:11 when I write that.
I love reflecting on and deepening into the processes and share them as a way for others to also see how we can utilize them to understand the why’s and to have gratitude for each piece and step of the way.
Even the not so fun, uncomfortable, challenging, and painful parts still apply to “life as an experience”and process we can teach ourselves to become more present to and receive the reflections of.
If I’d continued to circle round and round with my attachment to those times in my life, I would have remained stuck and could not have created something different, or perhaps would no longer be here even. Through trials and tribulations, trial and error, and experimentation, we reach a little further each time.
I don’t think it’s easy, but I do know anything is possible.
I now have new hurdles to jump if I want to continue to create more and what I feel called to bring forth, but with the experiences behind me, I have built strength and resilience to face them with a lighter approach.
Literally “dropping into” this new space, I invite a merging to take place that creates the space for more.
I remember how last year at this exact time, when we first arrived back in Tahoe with the Magick Bus, we spent a lot of days at Fallen Leaf Lake taking in the Fall colors. Synchronously, this last Friday the 13th marked two years since we’d officially moved into the Magick Bus in 2015 on a New Moon. A beautiful full circle celebration and truly the life choice that changed everything for us, and especially for me. Today marks five weeks to the day already in my foot’s healing process and it’s doing very well with all the nurturing I’ve given it. Yesterday I was itching to get out more and so we did about a 3+ mile, relatively easy hike with my boot along Fallen Leaf Lake because the Autumn colors were calling me again. It felt so good to be out in nature with all the smells and sights.
SO much has changed since we put into motion our Magick Bus plan and made that leap with complete trust, detachment of results, and non-judgment of the process. It feels like lifetimes ago and also holds lifetimes within those two years of major movement of energy and manifestation that we experienced – even more than what I express here.
As I shared on Facebook, everything these days seems to point to an elevated need for patience, presence, process, and peace – the four p’s!
And when a dear friend asked about what I referred to in terms of the “process” part, I shared:
Processing what comes up and always being aware that everything involves a process… Just like life is a journey, but there are steps and stages to go through. Each of those steps being integral and important. We often get caught up in the result and want to know the outcome but you won’t until you go through the process, as each step can shift things and open to something completely different, but potentially better. That goes back to patience and presence. Patience with what you’re wanting to see in the world or create in your life. Presence with what’s before you now revealing insights and gifts to get you to the next step. And peace within along the way to anchor yourself and keep balanced.
Nature reflects and guides us on this life cycle so beautifully.
Not only has our journey the last two years been about all of this incredibly, including finding ourselves back here after a nine year cycle of where we began, but currently with our home remodeling and my book editing, I/we’re fully needing to live this day in and day out – not just simply as a thought we read for the moment and agree with, but as an actualized experience we embody.
I hope you enjoy these photo captures from yesterday’s hike and that you can receive the wisdom Nature has to share.
I LOVE the light encircling everything, bringing that full circle experience into visible acknowledgment.
Challenge Yourself to Find New Perspective & Create Balance While Moving Through the Times In Between
Finding gifts, meaning, purpose, opportunity for expansion and new perspectives, challenges to rise to and invoke greater creativity and imagination, the silver lining, and love in everything that shows up in my life is the way I choose to live and is what helps me to flow with the rapidly shifting experiences and potential hurdles that reflect themselves to me. There are many ways in which life can be lived, and many ways in which we can adapt our reactions into more conscious and present responses.
Currently, we have a lot going on here for the next few months, which could be stressful and debilitating if we allowed that to take hold, but each day I keep singing, giggling, and tackling each hurdle as they come, greeting each morning with gratitude and finding lightness in my approach and footstep I embark the moment’s journey on.
When I find myself caught up in the details, I remind myself of the bigger picture. And when the bigger picture seems too overwhelming, I focus on the moment and what I can do right here and now to the best of my ability. It’s a constantly evolving and continuously balancing dance to engage with ever-greater presence each day.
The Autumn beauty and light has painted its way into life here in the mountains, and it reminds me of how I can continually paint a new picture of how I want to be, the reality I choose to create, and the way I look at the world around me.
If there is something I don’t like, then I create more of what I do love. But to dwell in things feels counterproductive, except as fuel for the new. It is easy to become paralyzed by anger, fear, confusion, and over-thinking things. While I know of the dichotomy of experiences around me, I choose to be a creatrix of the way I want to see the world and send love to the things that need it.
Life is moving forward here, and alongside remodeling and preparations for moving, I am in the beginning stages of editing my book and have also begun some of the cleaning out for our new life in motion. It all feels very aligned with each other and aligned with Nature’s cycles. I’m definitely feeling that harvest of abundance, enjoyment of life’s gifts and nourishment, and also the preparation for Winter, and sense that Spring will be when all things come to blossom from this work and focus right now that is rich with gifts if I see it all that way and enjoy what each has to offer in the moment.
Official remodeling work begins tomorrow on the new home, and I’ve been slowly moving step-by-step through my book. If I were to think of all that needs to be done in a general way, that would likely throw me off center….instead I make lists of to-do’s and do what feels natural and in flow, but I don’t let it debilitate and stop me, otherwise nothing would get done. So even if it’s one small thing a day, this is still movement forward. I don’t judge the process.
And in the meantime, I pay attention to the sign posts and support that show up and I enjoy the discoveries along the way.
This has included seeing a lot of beauty in nature in what ever way I am able to with my still-healing-foot (which is at the half way point already at one month/4 weeks today!) – I’m about to head out later this afternoon for more – discovering new plants in our new yard each time I visit, planting 5 daffodil bulbs gifted to me by Faery Laura so we’ll have connected flowers come Spring, ordered our new Austrian Pines, already measured, mapped out, and ordered new things for my and Astrid’s room (it will be a bunny and Faery play world for creation making, imagining, and journeying), and have enjoyed some incredible new sightings and reflections.
These have included tons of hawks in the last couple of days….just Friday seeing 13 (a cool number) and extraordinary configurations I’d never seen, right after another. I’ve seen two hawks before sitting next to each other, which I did again, but right before them, literally several yards away, I saw THREE hawks sitting in a row, next to each other. Talk about incredible! Hawks are so dear to me and are my amazing navigators bridging Earth and Cosmos. They also always chime in with support and a thumb’s up that things are on track and magick is at hand!
I also saw out in a ranch field, what definitely appeared to be a fox, as it was very different than a coyote both in coloring and its physical appearance and attributes. I thought that was pretty darn cool, as it was the same day I reposted my black fox blog and had received a message from a friend that she just got a fox tattoo and we were discussing this energy abound for the collective right now.
So, I do find it hard to dwell in stresses or what seems wrong in the world, when so many things point to another possibility, perspective, and reality of things being aligned and on track…of support always around to help guide us another way if we in fact find things to be disappointing in other regards.
And as mentioned, I’ve already planned out my new room/office/Astrid’s sanctuary in the new home, which feels important and key to have that percolating and already imagined on a new plane of experience, and in the new reality unfolding. Since it always feels like the brain child of our home, where my office is, I feel like having already created/imagined this and put it in motion with planning it out on paper and already ordering things, seems to be anchoring all the new that is taking place there and will be.
I’m so excited about Astrid’s new things, which will be her Christmas gifts, since the timing will work out for that with move-in likely. I feel she is too and has had a hand in the planning of it all.
So, amidst the craze of things yet to do, and things in process, but not yet manifested, I am working with what is at hand and creating the reality of my visions on another timeline ahead of the now, but simultaneously merging.
There are infinite ways to approach life and to choose how to embrace it all. These are some of the ways I do and what makes life enjoyable every step of the way.
Find that balance and see how to temper things with the inversion of what’s possible on the other side.
I had this blog on my mind the last couple of days so I found it and am reposting it. I couldn’t just reblog it, as I already had once and WordPress lets you only do so one time. So I’m copying and pasting it here with different photos. Perhaps it speaks to your journey right now.
When magick finds you, embrace it and allow it to wash over you like a beautiful jasmine kissed breeze or a warm, rolling summer wave of Caribbean aqua silk ocean water.
Immerse yourself and just be with it.
When you find even just a little bit of magick in your life and you try to explain it, reason it out, and catch it, most often it will go away.
There are things in life meant to be experienced with a soft, brief yet soulful gaze, a gentle caress whose effects linger but the touch is but for a moment, or like a graceful butterfly that dances lightly around you just brushing your skin with whisper kisses, but never lingers long enough to settle.
After all, these things are fragile and not meant to be held, caged, or stopped to try to control them in any way, although they will create moments of time standing still and will take your breath away.
They are moments of magick.
Logic is a need to explain, prove, reason out, or have some control over something before you will believe it.
As humans, we tend to use logic solely or at least more than other things like intuition…and so we only learn a part of the truth.
While logic helps us to reason and decide if what we learn, hear, and see makes sense to us or not, and if we would like to choose that as our experience, it can also stop us from experiencing more.
Our senses shift when we come into a physical body and we tend to lose the ability to hear our spirits or to feel what authentically makes us whole. This happens because we begin to listen with other parts of us that feel more tangible…our ear and eyes alone do the listening and seeing and the unseen parts of us, well….go unseen and unheard.
The same holds true for our touch…only things we can tangibly feel with our physical senses and hold, make more sense to us, but the things felt only with the heart and soul we tend to disregard and won’t trust or believe in them to hold the same value, let alone let them guide our lives.
So despite having so many gifts naturally innate to who we are on a soul level, we begin to let others and other conditioning do all the thinking for us and make all of our choices for us too. To the point that we are no longer guiding the course of our own lives, but allowing others to tell us how to live.
Just because something can’t be explained or reasoned out, doesn’t mean it isn’t real or valuable.
There are many things that you can’t really fully explain – like love, imagination, faith, inspiration, how things like music happen, why artists, writers, and poets hear, feel, and see what others don’t, a mother’s bond with her child that transcends all, how twins are so in tune with each other even when separated, nature’s miracles, and even the miracle of you right here and now….
Aren’t the things you can’t explain just as, if not more so, important than the things you can?
Invite a little more magick into your life without a need for explanation and your natural gifts will begin to flourish, not to mention your life will feel more fulfilling and yes…become more magickal.