Today Astrid would like to speak to that little voice inside of many of you that sometimes wishes to just curl up in a ball and shrink back into a dark corner or closet – maybe even just pull the covers over your head and pretend the world has no idea you exist. Maybe you prefer being invisible sometimes and this can serve well in specific cases, but perhaps you’re holding yourself back out of fear or a deep-seeded experience that leaves you afraid to put yourself out there.
Living so close to, and intimately with, the ground and Earth, rabbits know how to “hide” well, but this can have a two-fold meaning of either having the need to camouflage and blend in or that you have made yourself so small that you are un/under-recognized for who you are and the gifts that you embody.
Rabbits know the importance of awareness and protection, but they are not shy about exhibiting their exuberance and big personalities when they feel the urge to do so. In fact, they will leap with glee when the moment moves them, or rise to the challenge with fierceness, despite being seen as small, timid and fragile creatures.
They are extraordinary sound navigators who know when to seize the moment and “hop” into new territories and experiences. Their ultra-sensitivities create the light when all seems lost and dark.
And this is the place Astrid wants to address for those of you who find yourself feeling lost so much, desire to shrink away, or aren’t even aware that you are diminishing your light when it’s needed the most right now in the world.
Invisibility can definitely be a gift, but it doesn’t serve you or the collective to live in the dark eternally.
Life can’t go on, nor thrive, without light.
Astrid knows there are times she’s been afraid and that she’s needed to regulate her energy so as to find that balance of protection and safety, while also making herself known and asserted.
If she had remained purely in fear by her circumstances and triggers, she would not only not have survived, but not have been recognized for the gifts she has. Marcy of SaveABunny and her staff of volunteers saw her because of the big energy she put out, and of course we know that this is also how she and I made the connection.
We both had to rise to our highest and most whole, to have a meeting of equals merge into partnership and recognition of reflection.
We could easily have missed a beautiful chance if we both stayed small.
How many times might you have missed out on an opportunity because you kept yourself small?
How much of your dreams are you not able to experience because you hesitate to share your gifts?
How much love do you hold back from yourself because you’re scared to show others who you really are or to feel how worthy you are?
Is it disappointment, hurt, anger, or guilt that makes us fear ourselves and our power?
I often wonder why these feelings win out over love over and over again.
Astrid shares that responsibility can play a part in this process we seem to be learning in exercising our gifts and powers.
But she and I both agree that responsibility can can carry its own weight that isn’t always tempered with love, but analyzed and dissected by ego.
So in fact it, too, can lead us astray of going bigger, as it tries to work out every angle to satisfy another excuse not to shine forth.
While we think that hiding serves us well, in most cases it is a reaction to something now or from a “past” that didn’t go the way we hoped. And even though those triggers and experiences are gone, we are still operating as if they are happening right now.
This perpetuates our “staying small” and unable to shine our inner lights, like rabbits do, to navigate us through the dark tunnel labyrinths of experience.
And in some cases, we devise ingenious ways of talking ourselves out of letting our energy out bigger to serve our ego fears and can even find spiritual bypassing ways of describing it and why it makes sense to do so.
Truth is, if you want to find a reason not to do something you can always find one.
And when it comes to our wholeness and embodying our potential, we have all the excuses in the world why not to do that.
Whether or not those excuses are valid is between you and yourself.
Astrid wants to remind you that it’s okay to recognize when camouflage and invisibility can serve us and be a magickal tool in our back pocket to pull out now and then, but “hiding” when rising would benefit you most, is not the healthiest choice to always fall back on.
It’s okay to learn as you go and make instant adjustments along the way. Chances are, you’ve already done years of work so truly, now is about the experiential classroom. This is about being both student and teacher and bringing integrity and humbleness to the process of being.
Now, more then ever your gifts, your light, your essence is needed in the world.
And while you think you may be alone in facing those frightful triggers, experiences, and the things that feel scary in the world, you are not.
More and more souls are finding that the way out of hiding is to actually step out. No one is going to force you out nor pull you out. Only you can make that choice, but it’s a very liberating choice that once made – even in small steps – suddenly helps make sense of an upside down world and brings authentic power to the forefront.
Astrid says, “The more you wear a mask, the less you will ever know yourself. It’s not just others you hide from in doing so, nor whom are robbed of knowing your beauty and experiencing your ripple across the world. You are the one who is hurt the most when your light is kept small.”
Astrid knows how I, too, have kept myself small in the past and straddled timidly between two worlds of fears and hopes.
“And what did that do for you?” she asks me.
“It kept me stuck,” I replied. “Torn and tormented between two worlds warring against each other, rather than teaming together and empowering myself into truly living, rather than merely surviving.”
That reminds me of a favorite line Julia Roberts says in Steel Magnolias, “I’d rather have 30 seconds of wonderful than a lifetime of nothing special.”
How about you?
If coming out of hiding gave you the most enriching and fulfilling experience you’ve ever known and was better than your wildest dreams, wouldn’t it be worth “going bigger” for, even if it wasn’t forever?
Not that it couldn’t or wouldn’t be forever, but you won’t know it until you try it.
Or is the known feeling of suffering and smallness, more comforting?
“Everyone has the ability to go bigger, no matter what their circumstances are. You are creative beings and therefore have unlimited ways to bring through more of your potential. Feel bigger! Thinking is only half the story, but your heart will guide you past the limits of your mind,” Astrid says.
It’s not easy, I know, and can be quite sticky with layers, but personally I decided that the possibility of that total enrichment far outweighed the illusion of safety in the darkness.
Astrid says, “That safety is an illusion that keeps you away from your truth….away from being who you really are and experiencing what you have available. That illusion is the fix to experiencing the true power within your heart.”
And she’s so right.
We think we stay safe by staying small and hidden, but by making that our “norm” we not only get to experience more of it, but are dying a slow death.
Choosing to go bigger and stop hiding happens for each person at different times in their life or soul journey and in different ways, by different triggers, and timings, so there isn’t just “one” way to get there.
Yet the one thing we all have in common is “potential.”
And the more each of us do our best to rise to that potential, the easier it becomes for others to do the same.
Rather than spend time trying to make others step into their potential, why not utilize our resources to “be” the potential?
Rabbit doesn’t wait for snake to see the “potential” when it threatens her kits rather than finding something else to eat that day. Rabbit rises to her “potential” and becomes the bigger rabbit she knows herself to be and chases off the snake.
Yep, that’s right. There are videos out there that catch mother rabbits fighting off poisonous, deadly snakes to save their babies. It’s incredible, but this is the truth of their wholeness they weave in and out of, as they carry it at their core always.
And I’ve seen this happen not only with people, but myself as well, where we’re put into dire situations and then rise to the occasion.
But wouldn’t it be wonderful to rise always, rather than only when threatened or in our darkest hour?
Those moments demonstrate that we have it in us, but we choose not to always shine the light.
Astrid carries this bigger energy with her always. You can see it and feel it, even if not demonstrated every second, but when she wants to, she does. She’s not afraid to let you know it’s simply who she is, nor is she worried how you might judge her. She knows the truth of who she is will reach the truth of each of us and when truth meets, that’s the most authentic and fulfilling experience, regardless of result. Yet, it also helps reflect and draw to her exactly what she needs and wants to see, while not missing out on what it feels to be alive.
I asked Astrid if she has any advice to offer to someone wanting not to hide anymore, but is too afraid.
She thinks a moment and replies in her own way, “There will never be a perfect moment to wait to do something and tomorrow is not always a promise. We can’t survive alone in the dark forever. Night turns into day and it is your nature to do the same. In and out you weave, but weave you must, or cease to be. Both the Sun and Moon know just when to shine on the Earth or how to allow others the same. Yet they DO and WILL shine in fullness and never cease to shine while others are. They dance in and out, sharing the stage of the grand show. You may not know how stepping forth and being bigger will be embraced, but embrace it for yourself and you will find your place on the horizon amidst the other stars. It’s there that we will meet, heart-to-heart.”
What I’ve learned, and Astrid describes so beautifully, is that the truth of who you are is not something you can hide from forever. It catches up to us, no matter how fast we run away. Just as the Sun’s light keeps shining, despite your only seeing it half the day, so does your light, despite blanketing it in vein.
Eventually, your essence will see its way through, so why not give it a boost out?
“That’s right! Being who you really are is what we need most in the world at this time and is the greatest service to humanity,” concludes Astrid.
Rebirthing seems to be a theme running through the collective and just today it came through to me through five different streams of experiences and messages from others. One of them being Astrid, as rabbits reflect this symbolism well. She’s been very eager the last couple of days to not only nudge me hard at my ankle, but has bee-lined to me in order to grab a hold of my pant leg with her teeth to get my attention.
Likely she knew of the energy overload I was experiencing and the upgrade about to take place, but it also seems she’s been really keen on my being with her so that we can navigate the unknowns together.
Rabbits are very at home in the labyrinth Netherworld where intricate underground passageways and dark twisting tunnels are the norm and where they feel secure navigating their travels by intuition and inner light alone.
Change is no stranger to them and they are accustomed to making decisions in the face of fear and maintain peaceful focus amidst chaos.
After all, their survival relies on it.
This sense of self and ingenuity is a gift that reflects to us our ability to master the same within us awaiting our reclaiming.
As Lee shared in his December Energy Update yesterday, “We are built to handle change.”
And as the ever-rebirthing rabbit says, “You, too, can get in touch with change and ride the sands of time, as the seasons weave their cycles.”
Astrid knows change very intimately and has braved the new every step of the way. Recently she shared about her own upgrade to a Castle Tower, and while it had mirrored our own shifts up until then, it was also foreshadowing more change upcoming for me.
That hit yesterday, as I’ve added a heap load of new into my life recently (including a wave of new energy painting) and its been a process to integrate a balanced schedule with it all.
I’ve been feeling a build-up of energy in a way I can’t describe and it catapulted me to this suspended point outside of this or that. It released tethers that provided any sense of familiarity and detached me even more.
Astrid says, “This is the Cosmic way, and when you are at home within this unknown, you realize the power of your own inner light above all else.”
It keeps coming at me with the expression of new inspiration and focuses, along with the stripping away of layers, the joy of surrendering things to others ready to own their own level of responsibility and reclaiming, and the deepening gratitude that stretches me to farther reaches of heart generosity that lives for today.
Astrid often sits tall and looks me straight into my heart with piercing wisdom that seems both so far away and so tangibly rich.
She says, “This is because I reflect the heart’s Great Mystery that can only be experienced by way of both loving and letting go more. Then you experience the vastness and beautiful complexity of Cosmic Love.”
She continues sharing “This overload of energy is a liminal space you’ve been experiencing as a compilation of layering new pieces onto pieces you don’t want to forget, while juggling ways to hold them within the still limited version of unrealized potential, rather than relaxing into these things already being who you are. The reminders have already done their work and the memory can now let go into the ease of embodiment. It’s time to create from the impetus of fertile inspiration and allow these to rebirth completely anew.”
And so, yesterday, my mini Notebook (the computer I’ve been using the last 5 years) finally and fully overloaded. I’ve been receiving messages from it over the past few months that there was no space remaining and our attempts to delete things went in vein.
Then my computer said, “No more.”
Just as Astrid said, “Come join me as you already are.”
Ironically and synchronously this took place yesterday directly after I posted Lee’s December Energy Update and right after I received an email from a very special spirit and artisan who after a couple of months since onset of our correspondence, had completed creating “a celestial muse” she was working on in collaboration with me that happens to embody “creation” and not surprisingly, but without me saying anything, wove the song of my heart into being.
It just so happened that I was ready for this, as anything of importance to me – truly only my new novel – is stored on a tiny little chip, and things that might “seem” important, but speak of the old days for me, were surrendered away. I let it all go, including several years of saved emails and work correspondence from days of the past and embraced Dave’s extra, heavy duty computer as my new replacement, which I’ve been using for our shared side business bookkeeping.
The overload caused everything to run in circles, take forever to implement, reverse working at all without hours of dissecting, and simply not listen to or understand commands.
In essence, I would not be moving forward unless I walked into a much more expansive field where pieces are not even present to remind me and only embodiment speaks for itself.
All of the new energy couldn’t keep piling on to things working in the background and using up space in one way or form. A larger playing field within the vortex of my heart had to be opened where things move freely and are simply an intrinsic part of me.
I said goodbye to the memories while closing all access of return and this new and vastly larger platform now provides the space for that “impetus of fertile inspiration” Astrid spoke of.
Better yet, I have no attachment to it and anything on it, which feels extra freeing, as I don’t feel the computer to be mine. It is more of a portal and conduit to bring things through, but to shut away and detach from at end of each day.
And then today, some wonderful and full circle soulful unfoldings took place when the perfect guardian said yes to my passing on three sacred items that speak of what has been some of the greatest importance to me and my lifetimes, which I only recently had also been nudged to surrender over in trust.
Astrid was specifically involved in this, literally getting my attention and moving these pieces into my awareness.
I couldn’t ask for a wiser companion.
I’ve also found myself giving out in bigger ways than ever lately, feeling that vastness and abundance, without need to hold on. There are infinite ways for things to come about. To hold onto something as an idea of insurance was also robbing the good it could do in so many other ways now, including the very way I thought it might one day help.
Astrid has been quite the muse in all of this – amusing and musing!
When I do something from that infinite place she binkies with delight – I call it a Cosmic Binky.
When I’m missing the point or urgency, she grabs hold of my pant leg.
When I’m “getting it” and download her wisdom, she peers deeply through me in her Buddha Bunny- like stance with eyes dark as the Cosmos and a twinkle of starlight at center.
This morning, as we were still prepping Dave’s computer for me I was upstairs at our usual Ask Astrid blog time so Queen Astrid came running upstairs to get me. She waited patiently beneath the graceful towering giraffes – her grounded sentinels of grace and divine purpose.
From there she was downloading today’s message, as she helped me to connect the dots with all the latest happenings.
Every day a new layer of fine-tuning is integrated.
She reminded me that every time my energy gets an “upgrade,” so do my computers and cell phones.
And we both know that this is true for many of you out there as well.
Our energy shifts affect things around us.
Rabbits are finely attuned to energies and reflect them to the tiniest degree.
My two other rabbits, Nestor and Joy, used to have physical blow-outs because of the expansive energy they would channel and their bodies had to readjust, which isn’t the easiest always for bunnies.
Astrid is much better at managing her energy and wants me to understand those tweaks and fine-tunings that can help with optimizing my own.
This time it wasn’t about forcing a change by crashing my computer and losing things, but more about mindfulness that gave me the option of tweaking realizations and moving forward more effectively and in bigger ways.
As we go through changes, which right now everyone is experiencing in varying degrees of relative intensity, there are ways to tune into those little tweaks so that we can all optimize our energy.
Sometimes they’re easier to see and feel than others, so reflections like these can assist us.
For me, it seems Astrid is sharing that just as she fully chewed down and got rid of her Carrot Cottage so it no longer takes up any space, in order to make space for her Castle Tower, so too did I need to look at the tiny ways space was being held by things I already embody.
I had even saved the top roof of the Carrot Cottage with the idea to create a little house upstairs for her and she was not interested in the least bit.
So I’ve since removed it completely once she said, “I told you we’re done mom. I love the memories it held of my being welcome to my forever home, but our love is now permanent and the cardboard house takes up space our hearts can use to create and anchor new growth in.”
So, in reflection, while I may have given up the work and things of the past, if it still sits there even as storage space on a computer, or as an item tucked away on a shelf, they’re still taking up space I could breathe more freely in and by removing them I brush away the dust of memories and awaken the sparkle of birthing new stars.
Astrid smiles. “Change is like the beautiful birth of a star.”
We hop into the third and last of this week’s new blog series with Ask Astrid Fridays ~ The Rabbit’s Corner. When checking in with her on what she wanted her first blog to focus on, she reminded me of her experience waiting for a couple of years+ at SaveABunny for someone to “see” her. Besides the founder, Marcy, and her wonderful staff of volunteers, no one could find the bridge within their hearts to really tune in to who she really is and look beyond their first reactions to her assertiveness. Astrid wisely used this behavior to help reflect to others a way for them to meet her in their wholeness of power and most importantly to step out of the stories and noise and come back to the presence of peace within the nature of their essence.
A way for her to filter companions as well, as she truly needed someone who can rise to the occasion and match her vibration so that she’d be able to bring through the gifts she came to share. I’m beyond grateful I met her needs to help be her voice and I strive daily to keep growing and learning more from her about how to drop into my essence more deeply.
Astrid shares that presence is the art of seeing and being seen and is also the hidden language of the heart.
When we are able to truly drop into our hearts and open all the tentacles of awareness available to us, we will be more receptive to all of the messaging around us and the truth of any situation.
We learn rabbit’s gift of vulnerability and how to tune our ultra rabbit senses into all the seen and unseen things and worlds.
By being ultra aware and present in the moment, we are able to see past illusions and masks so that we are able to really hear, feel, relate to, and understand what’s beneath the surface.
We are able to see.
And, when we engage presence to what’s within, we naturally become more authentic and transparent for others to see us too.
Still to this day, Astrid uses this technique with anyone who meets her. She invites others to step into this field of experience as a way to be present to what’s really going on within and without, who we really are, our motives, what drives us, and how we can cross the imaginary boundaries we think separate us from others, all of Mother Earth’s children, and the Cosmos itself.
Rabbits are very complex souls in embodiment.
They have and speak a language of their own that isn’t like a dog or cat, although you might find some similarities.
A true presence and willingness to find the peace within, patience, and engagement of your intuitive heart is needed to truly understand the gifts they have to share.
Here’s a great and very thorough article about rabbit communication to help anyone interested in knowing their rabbits more, are curious about rabbits, might be drawn to having a rabbit companion, or simply want to understand the art of presence through rabbits:
Astrid will be back for more next Friday, but for now she wants to thank anyone who takes the time to read this and hopes it inspires a desire to drop into your hearts and invite presence more into your life.
There’s a whole world of hidden language, gifts, and messages that await you within and without to explore.
You just might find a yourself enjoying a hoppier life and a more enriched way of living and being your truest.