When you find yourself in situations that increasingly call upon your awareness and consciousness about the unconditional compassion you’ve come to understand along your journey – perhaps even as a healer, “light worker”, teacher, guide, leader… there is opportunity to consistently put into action “being the bigger person.” It’s not an easy thing to do, as ego crops up in many ingenious ways to make you feel justified in coming at things from a place of needed validation or desire for certain results, whether you want to admit it or not.
If you decide to step into the role of being the bigger person, there’s then the challenge of truly embodying what that means and not caring/worrying about how you look. It isn’t simply to appear as a martyr while you silently hold onto ideas of how you want the other person to respond when you do, but is about truly stepping into that role without attachment to any kind of result, except simply knowing it is the right thing to do.
You don’t do it in order to receive accolades and then harbor feelings of resentment because the other person didn’t recognize what you just did.
That ISN’T being the bigger person.
You do it because it’s who you are. It’s your embodiment you’ve committed to as your role in the capacity of beingness, vocation, or path you’ve chosen and that your path actually is asking of you to step into being more and more.
If you call yourself a teacher, that brings along with it a lot of responsibility, yes, and this is one of those responsibilities to lead with as an example to others.
No matter what the other person chooses to do or how they react after, you step into that vulnerability with all of your heart, knowing it’s for the highest good of all concerned, regardless of immediate outcome.
Being the bigger person truly is about “BEING”. It’s not just an idea to put on as temporary clothing to wear for the moment or day. It’s the skin you live in always and that takes a huge amount of surrendering to the peace only found within your heart.
It’s one of the hardest things to do, but the most rewarding.
Beyond the Two Sides of the Fence – Unconditional Compassion is Where the “Greener” Grass Actually Grows
Yesterday, and through recent observations and experiences, I was reminded by synchronous messages about the importance of responsibility and the lessons of unconditional compassion. My dearly departed Nestor (rabbit companion) was always an instant gauge for me in this respect, as she would help get me back on track if I got out of my heart and in my head or wandered off path. And because of the intensity of our connection, I would instantly shift gears back on target without hesitation, as her reactions were profoundly felt, and so I would do out of love what I would forget out of responsibility. In so doing, it always kept me in check and I learned to connect the two so that they were one in the same.
Unconditional compassion is to me the most important piece of the puzzle and equation to healthy, happy, rich and graceful living. Under that umbrella recipe there are many things that are part of the ingredients: patience, presence, tenderness, genuine kindness, unconditional love, nonjudgment, the ability to listen and walk in another’s shoes separate to your own, wisdom, etc. And responsibility is part of doing the most compassionate thing for others and yourself. This does not constitute a “better than” approach nor to act out of our ego desires and needs (subconsciously or consciously).
This all may sound simple, but it’s not and it takes constant and consistent “keeping yourself in check” regularly. Part of that is the ability to not react, but to respond. In learning this, we practice patient listening, reflecting and feeling from another person’s perspective. We also learn that authenticity is important and it isn’t simply about being nice or doing the so-called right or kind thing that we would be expected to incorporate out of social etiquette or righteous ethics. It is about authentically understanding the depth of unconditional compassion and how it takes root in honoring everyone’s highest good and everyone’s chosen path of evolution, while remaining respectful of who we and they are, lovingly and gracefully, integrating wise reflection and introspection in the process.
Many times we deny responsible action, forget to practice unconditional compassion and self sabotage the authenticity of who we are. It is easy for people once they progress to a certain point of growth or evolution to feel they have reached the epitome of right action and choice and that all others not practicing the same, are less than. When in fact, the more you evolve and grow, the more you are called to bring unconditional compassion more into your everyday experience, beingness and expression. Simply because you are in what seems to be a more evolved space than you were previously, does not automatically equate to reaching the end of the road of evolutionary progress. Life is a continual journey and process and we must challenge ourselves to push the envelope of our compassion further and further, to reach and see beyond duality, even if we ourselves choose one side of the fence. The grass is not always greener on your side or the other side. The heart chakra’s unconditionally loving and compassionate energy field of emerald green, is a place that resides boundless and beyond, integrating everything with what your current mind’s eyes cannot see.
Responsible action is unconditional compassion. Embracing the gifts you came into this world to share, as well as to courageously follow through in the path you chose, but likely have forgotten, are part of this. Honoring others’ paths with compassion, communicating with compassion, leading by example from compassion, loving compassionately, acting compassionately, teaching or educating compassionately…all things fall under the umbrella of unconditional compassion for greatest effect and in respect of the highest good of all concerned.
It’s easy to get caught up in things, it’s easy to forget, it’s easy to operate on autopilot, or to turn a blind eye to yourself and others. It’s easy to see and hear what we want to and to judge it from the scope of our own or our instilled mechanism for reacting. It’s easier to abandon what we know in our hearts is of the highest good to share and be. It’s easy to sabotage ourselves so that we act less than what we are, make excuses for who or what we are and do, or why we can’t do what we know in our hearts we came here to do and is our gift. It’s easy to forget that others have different paths and that the best way we help them and teach them is with patient loving hearts and unconditional compassion – to live this in authenticity and consistency in a way that exudes and vibrates out like one small thread that affects the whole web. Rather than point out what is wrong with others or berate yourself for faults you feel you may have, it is more effective to live what resonates for you in an unconditionally loving way and to steer away from unhealthy judgment or anger (directed toward self or others) that can reek havoc on your life in many ways.
If we say we are spreading compassion in one area of our lives, then consistency is the next evolutionary step…and to bring it full circle to ALL areas of your life and to everyone and everything you encounter, every moment of every day.
If you forget or deny your responsibility to follow your path or to act from responsible compassion then there will always be a reminder in some form (physical, mental, emotional, spiritual) that will come knocking on your door via messages in any way specific and relative to you, that can get your attention and at as many times as it takes, or at as severe a level as it takes, to help remind you. So it is beneficial if you can heed the disguised messages that are constantly available. I know it’s hard to hear and see them, especially sometimes given where and who they come from and how they manifest. Can seem arbitrary, unrelated and simply just life’s deck of cards you’re dealt. Remember, you are the master gardener of your soul and director of your life, as James Allen says, and the deck chosen was how YOU set it up, knowing what would best suit your soul’s desire and necessary process for evolutionary growth.
Taking the presence of the moment to step back each time you are about to do, say, act, think, avoid, fear, anger, fight, judge, deny, withdraw, defend, etc…and move into your higher heart, can make all the difference. In so doing, it allows you to receive the message of unconditional compassion that is there always when you are ready to hear it. And this in turn will alter your entire experience, as well as its emanating, residual effect.