Creating life as a work of art is my personal motto and nature is such a guiding light example for this kind of artistry. I used to make life hard for so many years – part of that due to not having boundaries, which drowned out my voice of origins. The rest was a much needed excavation journey, but all along the nature of my heart kept singing. I just couldn’t hear it loud enough nor trusted it above the conditioned and accepted patterns and cycles I was caught up in.
The more I spent time in nature, the more I relaxed into my own.
I find all the answers to questions reflected around me always on nature’s canvas. Every tree, plant, flower, animal, insect, rock, terrain, season, and weather pattern displays a lesson for life and demonstrates how simply we can recreate, blend, merge, and resiliently design what is needed in each moment.
Perhaps that’s part of why rabbits speak to me so much too, as there’s still so much wild in them even if domesticated, and their Earth connection is richly woven into their bodies and souls.
I shared some of this on an Instagram post recently, but it goes along with this share:
I find it beneficial to embrace, and allow myself to experience, all of who I am without judgment. As I embrace all of my parts and their purpose for having been, a new perspective is born that rewrites my experience. As a result it creates a new template for a more loving, flowing relationship with myself of experiences filled with greater grace every step of the way. It’s not always easy, especially in the beginning, but with practice it becomes more natural and seamless.
I no longer need a catastrophe, physical crises, break down, or shove up against a wall in my life to know what my heart and soul needs and what changes are necessary in the bigger picture of things. My process is more about alignment, trust, and flexibility.
Support and expansion is there when I am in that flow.
While it might seem more logical to make changes when there’s a challenge, I say it’s quite empowering to make them when there aren’t.
For this reason I have understood why some people have thought I might be going through a challenge of some sort to make decisions like taking sabbaticals or changing courses altogether in areas like work, home, life and love, but the decisions are based on choice following inner knowing. I’m grateful to experience things in this new way – a way that reminds me of how nature simply unfolds in every moment, whole and complete.
Nature is my constant guide for life.
My time in nature gifts me endlessly. I find it to be the most profound for channeling, receiving inspiration, the most supportive for deep conversations, and abundant with messages and answers I’ve been pondering.
Nature helps me weave life as a work of art, as not only is she full of creative potency, but she offers me so many options and perspectives for how I want to paint each experience.
This was a feather treasure from Sunday’s long trek on the Flume Trail above Lake Tahoe. It’s very peachy gold and at first reminded me of many of my hawk guide feathers although wondered about owl since the feathers have many similarities. Upon further exploration of my feather collection and hearing from bird experts we confirmed it as great horned owl. I have several feathers from owl and hawk in my treasured collection. The timing of this one and finding it on a steep ledge upside down – nearly undetectable to the naked eye unless meant to be seen – felt very aligned.
Just some of great horned owl’s symbolism includes timing, hearing the unspoken, seeing and protecting the unseen, harbinger of new cycles and life transitions, piercing beyond the veil, shape-shifting, Great Mystery, wise action, recognizing light and dark coexisting, higher intuition, knowing, able to pierce through shadows and fears and see the darkness of others’ souls – therefore not easily being deceived.
The “knowing” aspect was synchronously peculiar, as I’d just been explaining to Dave about the form of psychic awareness I have and is continuing to grow, which comes through as a “knowing” that is part of me rather than separate to me or in some flash of channeling from outside myself. There is no separation between the things I experience and receive, making them feel very normal, natural, and seamless, possibly easily dismissed in this fashion, but I’ve learned over time to trust. Owl has shown up in readings in my past as my life path.
More interesting is what I discovered upon further exploration of great horned owl showing up that speaks to what I’m feeling. Owl can speak to stillness, slowing down, and silent observation, with perhaps even removing oneself from things to see truths all around. Owl also indicates releasing part of our lives to stay aligned and continuing to steer true to the course of inner truth guidance.
The avian clan is around me always in many forms, but the bird family of hawks, owls, osprey and falcons have been especially meaningful to my life as spirit guides, visionary teachers, and protective sentinels. Hawks are the most frequent creative life partners, with owls, osprey and falcons showing up less frequently, but at crucial points.
I’ve definitely been in a recalibration mode recently, as I have had to readjust to returning from sabbatical at a challenging worldwide crisis time while also opening to more work. Things have gotten busier than I imagined (all good things with integral purpose), but it’s very different from the quiet three months. I’m back to having client sessions and doing Reiki Healing Attunements – more than I thought but understandable, am beginning work on a book cover for an author that feels to be an important portal creation, and trying to still get my novel moving forward. I’ve also been spending extra time in the garden, cleaning up, planting, seeding, and watering and getting longer miles in than usual of exercise with hiking and biking in new areas to keep my equilibrium for well being. That alongside day-to-day things we all do like taking care of a household, three fur babies, cooking, cleaning, handling a shared side business with Dave, interacting with my community online with posts and blogs, and making sure there’s pure relaxing, do-nothing-time that’s a must in every day for me – all takes initiative, intention, focus and commitment.
After early years of strict security-based regimes, I unfolded into the freedom loving, wispy, part of me not wanting to be bound by anything and wanting to avoid hard work (escapism), and now I am creating a marriage of both as my artist’s way of life. Synchronously aligned with my actual marriage upcoming, which we just got our license for yesterday.
Now is a time for constructive use of freedom through healthy self-discipline in my life – in essence, creating a delicate balance between freedom and structure. This involves using levels of freedom wisely and well, which just so happens to also point to the numerology trajectory I’ve activated with this year’s birthday.
I’ve lived at both extremes and most of my life is now focused on implementing and embodying moderation through merging of organization, commitment, routine and responsible choices to the honoring of freedom that I also seek. This is a newer undertaking that merges the natural aspects of myself and focuses on their strengths with understanding of how committing to a certain sense of structure can actually offer the true freedom I desire. It also assists with attaining goals, manifesting, and experiencing greater clarity.
Nature reflects this for me in how she embodies so many seeming opposites together that work beautifully as a unit. There is a natural cycle, structure, inherent wisdom, sacred geometry, and symbiotic relationship that abides by certain unspoken universal ground rules, but there is also incredible variety, unusual evolutions, surprising mutations and resilient behaviors, and freedom to be wildly you that she speaks to so beautifully.
When I face frustrations in my process or feel restricted in some way, while I teach myself new, more freeing ways, I’m reminded of how nature doesn’t complain, but simply discovers new ways to thrive or renew. She reminds me of the resiliency inherent within and that sticking to my commitments will see me through and the balanced way to that is by remaining flexible, but disciplined, and focused, but open to change.
This has led me to start creating a guiding, daily time schedule while I have multiple things going on. I’m putting that together in a way that feels balanced, manageable and reasonable, while being flexible when necessary. That said, it feels incredibly important to create this in a way that is motivating and fun, but keeps me on track. Life isn’t about force and punishment. Those are old patterns of conditioning that have no place in the now. In the past I’ve been more of a one-off kind of person wanting to get each things done fully before I moved on and was an extremist. Now I’ve taught myself to be okay with things constantly in motion and giving time to each as I can in a way that feels aligned and fluid. This is healthier for me to maintain daily variety, momentum in all areas, creates a more natural rhythm and takes pressure away.
It’s also how nature creates.
I’ve also learned to say no over the years to projects and things in general, which I continue to, and to only say yes to what resonates. I newly implemented weekends to not being available so I get time away from it all too. In the past, any day seemed like a free-for-all. In all, there’s a slowing down and flow in order to not create anxiety and I remove pressures of “should’s”. I’m finding life much more rewarding and rich and I’ve never felt more vibrant.
We each have our roles and parts to play and mine is definitely as an “as within, so without” process in constantly holding that mirror up to Nature and the world at large to make those adjustments in reflection.
By working on greater equilibrium in all areas of my life, continuing to support my joy and needs alongside others as equally important, and letting go, and committing to living in alignment, all of that has balanced out before my eyes, including physically with natural changes I’m going through at my age.
And speaking of blossoming, the above and below photos are of our first blooming tree here. That seems reflective of little bits of new growth and opening in my life happening one step at a time. Things don’t just burst open all at once here in the mountains until a momentum kicks in.
Much like my own process, as I keep the wheels turning and do whatever I can in some way, inevitably there’s a chain reaction of further results that come from my continued forward movement. And soon the garden and forest will cycle into full bloom.
In the meantime, nature is in slow, steady growth right now here in the mountains, with constantly shifting weather. It speaks to me that my own life creations are needing to take their own time, too. So, I plan to relax and pick up a new color to paint life with, as the moment dictates. I will paint a little here and a little there so as to bring all parts of life together with joy and connection, be present to how each piece is integral to the next, and how there’s purpose in every brushstroke.
The idea of schedules always was daunting, but I now see it as crucial to creating life as art where I bring through all strengths together just as nature creates her masterpiece as a unit.
This doesn’t mean I don’t get things done when some of them do actually have deadlines, but I create more gentleness and joy around it all along with extra room for each by stretching them out and letting go in general when things unfold differently than I thought. Life continues to open in new ways the more I open to the true nature of me.
I’m going to be a little more “in between” worlds again, as I am needing to go to places more fully to receive what the open door is ready to channel through. I seem to be going through an evolution of sorts on several levels, to include greater access to more latent parts of me now rising. I’ll continue to keep balancing my “me” and “sharing” times with increased vigilance in order to maintain that natural rhythm and alignment.
Like the Sibyls, from which the ancient heritage within me is rooted, who lived hidden and out of reach in order to filter the energies that accessed them so they could remain devoted to the sacred purity of their connection with Mother Earth and the Cosmos through sound, there is a place within me calling for that path, moving in and out, at times unreachable, and yet ever more connected.
Since this is an Artist’s Corner post, Astrid and I share a little reminder that our Magick Rabbit Beltane Sale (the largest to date) continues through June 20th, Summer Solstice. We’re down to just 14 items (thanks to your loving support), which include updated versions with new bunny colors of our last three (UPDATE SOLD OUT) Serenity Silhouette Magick Rabbit Talisman Necklaces – all in the Cosmic Egg Style. There’s a royal blue with silvery white rabbit with a blue eye (SOLD), a sunflower yellow with gold rabbit with blue eye (SOLD), and an olive/green gold with black golden rabbit with green eye (SOLD).
And we also wanted to share a gratitude update that with your help our Magick Rabbit Etsy Shop has been able to raise donations of a little over $3100 for rescue rabbits, over the last 15+ months. We’ve sent portions of sales and auction items, as well as donated items to raise money, including 50% of proceeds from several original paintings to various non-profit rabbit organizations and micro sanctuaries with your help. The larger ticket items (original paintings) have been super helpful with this. We have six beloved ones remaining that include three animal spirit guide portals and three Magick Rabbit mini portals all found at the link below.
The sale includes 30-50% off, which makes owning an original painting like this a huge bargain. Smaller whimsical items still available too. Limited stock remains on greeting cards, notebooks and prints – all at incredible steals to bring joy to hearts and support to lives.
June feels ripe with much in motion and round-the-clock fullness, which is being mirrored in all the flowers and green blossoming everywhere. I mentioned recently in conversation that dream time is stepping forth in grand ways because it is where the layered realities of our multi-dimensionality are. This reality we are focused on in waking life is but one offshoot of what really is and things will flip when the collective is ready to “live the dream.” This last week has been layered with interweaving parts that are merging into a new creation. I’m sensing many can feel what I’m saying and are experiencing the difference, as well as likely have been involved in a lot recently too.
The first three photos you see here are of our home on the forest. Everything right now is coming up flowers and is completely enchanted. I can’t get enough of all the variety of wild flowers surrounding our house and throughout the forest, as we let our hearts wander the paths. I can’t help but stop to take them in with all of my senses, which sparks a feeling within to skip and frolick to join in Nature’s dance.
The layers of lush beauty and blooms seem to reflect the many layers of fertile potential stirring in the cauldron of our inner desires and dreams. Anything is possible. We just simply have to choose what we want to nurture, cultivate, and grow with all of that potential.
And speaking of dreams, I can’t emphasize enough how potent these are and have been for me. Things have been amping up and increasing there. I’ve always been a vivid dream weaver, but I’m experiencing so much more there than ever, including more of that cohesion of bringing together the multiple realities going on at once so that things are becoming more seamless.
I continue to dream in excess of people I know and having remote viewings, very clear psychic experiences – that I would rather say are simply tapping into the other realities and living and remembering them in the now, rather than actually being this psychic experience that seems supernatural – and when I touch in with people they confirm what I “dreamed” as being exactly what is going on with them.
This in part has to do with my Pisces boundless energy, but I’d like to emphasize that I feel this is where we’re headed as a collective in progressively tapping into our multi-dimensionality as no longer a concept in our minds, but a reality we live and co-create in. It would be too much for many if it simply opened fully and immediately, so in stages, the more each of us are tapping into it, the more the collective at large is, and vice versa it also speaks to the readiness of the collective that this is possible too.
This is the progressive spiral of humanity moving into a wider experience of dimensional cognition that the other parts of ourselves are already experiencing.
I’m finding that the more this happens, the more full my life is and the more I am experiencing the direct alignment and effects of every little thing I do very clearly. When we stop to recognize and be curious about it all, we expand and draw in more possibility.
It’s been a full week and continuing. I know many of you have found yourself with full plates as well. I always like to review things in my life and connect the dots, as it ignites things more and bringing things together.
And what a week it’s been:
- I read four books – just started my 5th – that had the perfect ingredients for the next leaps. I haven’t read much recently, but Dave has a library card and the last time I went with him I suddenly found myself with a stack of six books coming home – I’ll likely have the last two done here shortly. I followed my intuition and was led to the exact books perfect for the next phase of experience and creation. Even the order I’ve been reading them has unfolded in perfect cohesion.
- Cleaning out and organizing was at the forefront again – I am finishing our bedroom closet, started my office closet, and Dave and I have been working on our garage – the last piece of our house getting fully settled since moving in. We marvel at the fact that nearly 100% of the garages people have here in Tahoe are unusable, meaning they are full of stuff people store or throw in there and they park their cars on driveways – yes even in the snow of Winter. And even the few who do park inside have disorganized garages that are a storage area for mostly old and unused things. Feels very symbolic to me about the subconscious and unconscious parts of the collective that are running the show in the shadow. I feel that even our unseen spaces speak to our lives and it’s bothered me that the garage was, to us, unorganized even though to others it wasn’t. And the same for my office closet, although organized, just has way too much in it that I had to find space for at the time and now is going to be cleared. This speaks to clarity of mind, heart, vision, and manifestation to me and also of shadow integrated rather than hidden, denied, or tucked away. As I look through every piece it reflects a piece of my inner world I am putting into productive use or releasing. The timing on getting these clear as the last steps, mirrors what’s ready to come forth. We even decided not to just organize and open our last boxes for the garage, but are getting rid of things, got shelves and storage boxes to have it all organized, are hanging our bikes to have clear space, and before all this we’ve been prepping the foundation of the garage – also symbolic – by cleaning it, filling cement cracks, and painting it in a nice finish to keep it clean and look good. No reason the garage can’t be special! It feels like taking care of the shadow in a way of valuing and merging it as usable.
- I found a magickal horse duffel bag hidden in the garage – in the process of all the moving around a bag of stuff showed up that I thought I had lost, got stolen, or I threw away by accident. But in going through this process it showed up tucked away behind things. In the bag were some very cool things that were meaningful and special, including a portal tapestry I’ll be hanging downstairs in the guest room that will mirror mine and create a dual doorway reflecting layers of multi-dimensionality we have access to. Treasures found in the process of clearing.
- I found our telescope – my parents had given us a telescope when we moved back to Tahoe and there it was in the garage all dusty and in a corner. I cleaned it up and brought it in and set it up downstairs for now. This feels like a treasure too with clarity, vision, and connection bringing the Cosmos in closer merging with Earth, as the two become one through our physical forms
- Honing in on details for more effectiveness – I/we have been doing a lot of this and especially so in the shared business/work I have with Dave. In the interim it may seem like more work, but sets things up to be passive and supporting the intents we have for our life
- Anchored in new sacred rituals – in bringing to light more ways to be effective and aligned, I’ve added in some different practices to enrich my/our life further and it’s definitely making a difference
- Deepening shadow work and increased daily vitality and magick – this has included another level of awareness and application to bring more unification to life and making things easy and natural to discern and experience in each moment
- Taking action on intuition and putting in place the steps for actualization – by listening to myself I’m seeing the thread on the weave tighten from being a loose loop and the image of the tapestry reveal itself by bringing things together. I’ve put my ideas out there vulnerably and have received welcoming yes’s to them. This is bringing together the perfect collaborations and I know will continue to
- Garden tower recycling prolifically – I’ve harvested quite a lot and the last big harvest left the tower quite bare, but it’s all grown back in again. This tower has been even more abundant and rich than my last one and I feel its reflective of the things I’ve shifted, as well as the endless abundance available to us in our heart wells. I love seeing everything as a metaphor for my life
- Blueberry sightings amped up – the wild baby mountain cottontail that lives here outside my office has been coming around abundantly. I named him Blueberry based on a dream I had of a bunny I adopted. The interactions between us and seeing him daily is another metaphor for things and to me is reflecting the path I’m on and have been cultivating, as well as the book I’m completing and its process
- Fun news about Astrid – TBA but not only have her ears healed, but she is stepping out more and more collectively in her work and visibility
- Sunshine immersion – during all of this I have been getting out daily in our beautiful 70’s weather and getting some great Vitamin D time, which I thrive on and that infuses extra vitality. I’ve also started using my Sun Oven again, which also infuses extra vitality in our food. So while dream time is revving, it is in balance with daytime immersions. All things in harmony create wholeness of being and experience
- Dreams going crazy with psychic, remote, and symbolic messages that are bringing waking and dream life together – I already mentioned that above
- And amidst all of it I’m still on track to finish my book this potent month of June with the Solstice portal aiding it. This is my last editing/reworking before I surrender it to the next phase and a professional editor
So, yes there are many layers going on and these are just the main ones I’m sharing to express how I integrate the meaning, reflections, and symbolism into my life as a unified field of experience.
These last photos are of the Forest Portal we live on, where this magick is unfolding, and of all the beauty blooming here in the wild, enchanted garden of my heart.
This is a tough one for many, especially when the giving and receiving is directed toward self, but also when we’ve erected protective boundaries that have us challenged to open our hearts again to others. The art of giving and receiving (our natural state of abundance) is another of the great lessons I have had to learn to balance in my own life, which prompted a blog post a few years ago, which this share is from, but rather than simply reblog it I decided to create a post out of it with the points from then to be in “new energy” all around.
I feel that it can be a challenge for many to balance giving and receiving in a healthy way and especially in terms of opening to receiving and embracing your own value and self-worth that comes along with that. I know that there is a lot of conditioned victim or martyr energy we have learned and this is an essential aspect to look at integrating, as self-denial and self-worth will have a direct result on your ability to tap into your natural abundance innately available to you.
Just like Reiki teaches us, everything in the Universe is energy and naturally, energy just wants to keep flowing and cycling, as is its innate “beingness” to do. It does not judge, attach, or stop and block the flow – we do. We are the ones that block it and this is what creates challenges and dis-ease in our lives.
Giving and receiving are two parts of a whole that coexist, are essential, and create natural balance. When we only focus on one more than the other – never allowing receiving to take place, or never freely giving – we are blocking the flow of energy to cycle through us both ways, and we then create energetic imbalance that manifests as challenges in our lives on any or all levels – physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually.
As we grow spiritually, this often presents experiences of greater receiving and giving in our lives to embrace. Since both are energetically equal, coming from the same Source, they increase mutually. So it doesn’t make sense that giving increases while receiving decreases, does it? They will both naturally increase together, which means receiving well entails giving well and giving more means we must be open to receiving more – ultimately supporting and embracing what serves the greater good and well being when we do so.
In order to have a fulfilling life, your giving and receiving must be in balance and rhythmic harmony. Balance is essential to every aspect of life and we are constantly in practice of creating what that harmony means for each of us, as there’s no one formula that will work for everyone since we all have different strengths and limits.
Stress can be a result of over-giving (this can also be a result of not having boundaries in place and energy vampires able to suck our energy easily, as we haven’t put in place healthy assertions), which can lead to other effects as a result, including damaging emotions that can build like resentment and anger, and the same can happen if you are receiving in imbalance.
So if you are feeling you are receiving too much, start giving now, and if you are giving too much start finding ways to appreciate what you receive and have. Keep on top of not overburdening yourself with the responsibility of giving, as well as be mindful of creating guilt, or not being grateful, for all of the receiving you’ve been gifted.
Simply recognize where the flow may be blocked and on a one way street, then start making adjustments to balance out the energy with either some random acts of kindness, donations, and offerings, or with more thank you’s and allowing to mirror your new found self worth.
In doing so, you will tap into the limitless and abundant being that you are and this will be reflected in all ways in your life to enjoy.
I was revisiting some key things with my North Node focuses and while they are linked with the sign mine is in (Capricorn), they also felt to be collectively key regardless of what sign you have, for ways you can approach your life, intents, and choices from a healthier and more effective perspective. This goes for any of the signs in the zodiac, as we have all of these energies available to us to use in their most effective and healthy ways, which equates to holistic well being and wholeness. But for sake of this post, since many of you are in the midst of working on bringing your dreams and path into manifestation and question or wonder about some things you could shift in your life, these are just a few general themes that could be worth implementing. Perhaps in upcoming posts, I’ll take on other signs to share ways to more effectively utilize and implement their energies.
When faced with a dilemma of whether or not to engage in something or invest yourself and time into, ask yourself if it will give you a full sense of self respect? If yes, go ahead and do it and you’ll be the true definition of successful and satisfied with it without regrets. If no, rethink your position.
Rather than focus on the things that haven’t gone your way in the past, which paralyzes you from doing anything in the now, focus on the past successes you HAVE had and release the past emotional baggage that you’ve been carrying that tries to deter you from recognizing your abilities and achievements.
Focus on ways to take back your authentic power, rather than giving it away to everything else and everyone else but you.
Stop procrastinating and just do it, with the trust in your accumulated experience and wisdom you’ve worked so hard at and gained through personal growth over the course of your life/lives.
Make balance your focus – not extremism. This includes knowing how to both self-nurture yourself, but also to take stronger command of your life with boundaries and tough love when needed.
Be wary of isolating yourself too much and find ways to connect. Be that with nature, animals, spirit guides, and/or with like-minded souls, as this will not only provide inspiration and cultivate presence to reflective messages, but also potentially provide co-creative opportunities and also strengthen your position in knowing others are right there with you, if in fact you’ve felt alone. Being able to thrive independently is valuable, but knowing how and when to work with others can be effective for pooling resources and gifts, challenging you to greater heights, deepening your compassion, and understanding your unique thread in the collective tapestry.
Cultivate a sensibility about yourself and an “in-charge” position.
Actively pursue your mission rather than talking about it, continuing to question it, and creating self-sabotaging illusions to keep you away from it. You will succeed IF you fully go for it and immerse yourself, your gifts, and your self trust into it.
Embrace greater responsibility in your life, rather than blaming others or relying on people for the things you want and need for yourself, and step up to your highest potentials, rather than keeping yourself small, hiding your gifts from others, or shying away from who you really are and what you are here to do.
Cultivate discipline to stay focused, determined, confident, resourceful, and not wasteful of your energy and time.
Engage self-control when needed and full-steam-ahead when called for. This goes back to balance and intuiting how to keep the perfect equilibrium that will maintain your energy and keep you on track to the ultimate achievements you are working towards.
Learn how to be a good manager of yourself and maintaining organization for greater clarity, while engaging your intuitive nature to step into those flows of alignment, as well as to understand others so you can be better at listening to and recognizing their gifts for optimization and harmonization.
So much rapid change taking effect in very literal ways for everyone and I’ve found it to be directly tied to greater embodiment of one’s own essence and authenticity, which then emanates clearly through. It’s connected to the messages we’re receiving about stepping up, raising our vibrations, and living out loud with greater courage and integrity to our nature of origins. And when we do, everything shifts in direct reflection to that in our environment, interactions, experiences, realities, and even how we start to look physically in correlation to our energetic frequency glowing from the inside out.
And the more we embrace who we are and aren’t afraid to put it out there, the more others feel greater ease and comfort in doing the same too.
I’ve written before on how my lifestyle and life path changes have changed so much for me as a result of embracing deeper integration of my uniqueness and what feels most authentic to myself, along with making balance and harmony a foremost focus and experience.
And while we speak often about the emotional, mental, and spiritual ways this happens and takes effect, we often overlook the physical because there’s an undercurrent of negativity placed there or invalidation of it because that’s thought to NOT be part of “ascension” ideas and living a spiritual life.
Time and again I’ll reiterate that it’s about integration….physical and spiritual together in harmony and each reflecting the other.
“The very reason each exists is to integrate wholeness and realize the partnership they share, one channeled through the other.
The physical becomes sacred.
The spiritual becomes tangible.
And together they exist simultaneously in harmony.”
(Excerpt from my book, Spiritual Skin)
I’ve always been quite literal in making outer transformations or taking actions that match my shifts internally or the shifts I desire to make, so as to create a space for me to grow into. Such has been the case, for instance, with my sacred tattoos. But it’s also been with things like my hair, my clothing, adornments, and even my body or face morphing.
A lot of this is that I tend to feel “not myself” if the outer doesn’t match the inner or where I’m headed and some of it is as a direct result of needing to express my personality, unique creative self expression, and way in which feels most aligned with the “real” me.
Some simply happens naturally and some with intention to match the natural.
So, as mentioned, with so many shifts lately for me in very dramatic ways, I’ve seen this naturally express itself with how I look and my desires to share how I feel.
Some results that naturally happened are my hair growing long very quickly, my silver grays growing in abundantly, but in a very almost deliberate way (someone recently called them “highlights from the Fae,” which I’ve now adopted and love), my body taking on a naturally balanced, more Earthly fullness rather than my waif self, my skin finding its healthy, clear balance because of my own, and my body becoming fully adorned with sacred and balanced art that feel like adornments reflecting the inside out I couldn’t imagine not being there (some people have shared they can’t imagine me without them and that they’ve never seen tattoos placed in such a way where they are like they’ve manifested themselves in transparency of revealing what’s underneath.)
And of course the way I dress has gone, and continues to go, through constant transformation, which is why I move out clothes often and bring in new that are more reflective and help me feel like “me” just as my tattoos help me to feel more at home in my own skin.
I immediately can feel “off” if my hair or clothing is not matching the vibe of how I’m feeling and what I’m creating in my life currently – literally, making me feel quite energetically icky and out of place.
And over this last year that has taken a huge turn, as mentioned already in my hair taking its natural, ancient and cosmic “roots”, and just this Saturday while visiting and taking my parents out to celebrate my mom’s upcoming 74th birthday tomorrow, I knew I needed to have my hair freshened and purged.
My mom used to be a beautician (what her family did back in France), so she’s done my hair a lot over time and Saturday we chopped off four inches to my very long hair. This felt necessary, as the ends are literally and symbolically the oldest parts and carry the energy of the past…so it felt important to literally shed it, just like my dreams of snake skins recently, and how I regularly enjoy body scrubs to slough off old skin too.
Being that my hair had grown so long, it still remains so, but it was amazing once again to see and feel how that made a difference even without getting a whole new hairstyle – yet. 😉 I not only looked different, but felt completely lightened and new and it even activated the next phase of change upcoming with more hair shifts to match dreams and visions I’ve been having of my origins.
But on top of this, I’ve purged, minimized further, and refreshed my wardrobe as well, and all of this has really become outwardly a reflection of the magickal parts of life and my wanting daily to, in all ways, live fully as all that I love and really am, and will keep me clearly focused on the path ahead in the most embodied and aligned way.
This has seemed to morph me literally into my Faery Bunny self, with hints of cosmic, ancient, and water nymph/mer qualities.
So while people may have felt this about me, it really isn’t something one would have to “feel into” anymore, as it’s becoming quite literal.
I feel and see this to be happening more and more with many people, as things shift and we’re lighting up those latent parts of our DNA, stepping up and out, and integrating more of our Cosmic and Earthly selves, we are seeing this in how we find ourselves walking in our human bodies as more of the otherworldy beings we have retrieved and remembered, through physical form here.
Exciting times and feels so much more natural.
So while most people know I’m a rabbit lover or perhaps a crazy rabbit lady 😉 some may not know how far that extends, but truly my life is immersed in Faery bunny energy through and through.
These are just some photos of the magickal bunny wardrobe I have and wear below. Photos include: 3 sparkly vegan rabbit shoes (I normally only wear flats, but bunnies have me reaching to new heights again these days when I feel so called), matching vegan rabbit purse, a one-of-a-kind amethyst carved rabbit ring, a purple satin skater dress with dancing bunnies, an aqua poodle skirt with bunny border, and my Peter Rabbit collection of vintage 60’s dress, wedge heels, vintage Beatrix Potter original sweater, and my Peter Rabbit statue from Laura.
Laura has even said I’ve literally turned into a Faery bunny, like this photo that briefly captured this in me seeping through in one of my shape shifting moments a couple of years ago and now seems to be the pervading emanation these days, although has integrated with the other elements I shared above, too. I’m curious to see how this will evolve and morph in the days and months ahead.
But what you don’t see pictured here is that my wardrobe and sacred space also include a vintage rabbit cardigan, 4 rabbit t-shirts, 3 rabbit tank tops, 3 rabbit leggings, 1 rabbit sweatshirt, several rabbit pendants and rings, 1 rabbit scarf, rabbit flannel jammies, rabbit artwork, a stuffed rabbit I sleep with (the surrogate bunny to my little ones that they enchanted), a rabbit support pillow, crystal rabbits, and other rabbit pieces for my sacred space.
And the rest of my wardrobe contains various other elements of “me” and anything that doesn’t I either have, or will continue to weed out.
I’ve fully cracked open the Cosmic egg and all the “me” is oozing out for sure without worrying what others may think. Just simply about living a life of passionate purpose by looking within and seeing what truly moves me and melting into that love.
One sweet friend of mine shared, “I love your daring use of fantasy fairy elements proving that fashion is for fun and personal pleasure and in this case also the delight of others.”
It reiterated to me, that when we embrace what truly brings us the greatest joy, express that in any and all forms, and understand how we can utilize all aspects of life and the material in creative, healthy, and valuable ways, we also bring that same energy to others to experience through our expressions and to mirror the relative possibilities within each other to do more of what supports this too in life.
So while I could just feel and emanate my essence energetically, I’ve been guided to literally take this through to all levels of experience, to include the physical as an expression of consistency and action in a holistic way and through every avenue of my existence here.
Having peeled back the layers I find clarity in my divine desires and that all things I’m about are truly encapsulated in the focus of what inspires me most. Channeling this into soul fulfillment, dream manifestation, and the reality of my choosing is the gift of letting this desire move through me and that includes moving through me in any and all ways – sharing and expressing my deepest divine desires and beingness.
One of my oracle tarot cards I recently pulled, shared this beautifully,
“Desire sometimes gets a ‘bad rap’ in spiritual circles, or it is celebrated as being something that should be pursued without restraint. The truth that will serve most spiritual aspirants best is somewhere in the middle of these two extremes. Desire need not be a distraction from your spiritual journey nor a goal to be pursued at any cost, even to your own integrity. Desire on the spiritual path can become a way to know what is going to move and inspire you enough to see you through the challenges that arise when you want to create a contribution to the world. If you long to bring your ideas to life, rather than keep them only as ideas, then desire can become enlivening fuel for the spiritual path, motivating you to act rather than hesitate. Searching for your true soul desires helps you find what it is you can believe in more than fear or doubt.”
I believe that living our authenticity in any and all ways that feels truest to ourselves and expresses our passions is effective use of creative power and supportive of personal empowerment and frequency, joyous living, and inspirational motivation that aligns and supports us with our intents, while igniting similar fires within others.
Plus, it simply brings a little sparkle of joy to the day, some giggles, and smiles…and if nothing else, that’s worth a lot!
Adrenal fatigue seems to have reached epidemic proportions and affects so many people, aware or not and many people I know, including myself. Many healers, sensitives, intuitives, creatives, and visionaries are just some of the people that experience its effects a lot due to being so empathic and open to feeling energies so easily. But anyone who has an overload of energy coming at them, little to no boundaries, and a predisposition to overdrive, high levels of endurance, sensitivity to others and the energetic environment, a lot of emotional stress, etc. will experience this if haven’t already. And those are just some of the things that can contribute.
Other things which can be one or a combination of many or all of these include diet (whether or not you get high quality foods in), vitamin deficiencies, toxic overload (environmental, chemicals, pollutants, energetic), inefficient quality of sleep leading to fatigue, stress (perceived or not and especially emotional stress), going through integration of major changes in life, upgrades being assimilated, trauma, chronic diseases that place demands on the adrenals, isolation, overworked, over-driven and overachieving, pushing yourself, living in the future and not the present, worrying, living outside your means or trying to support a lifestyle you think you need to have, operating on old patterns and conditioning you’re battling, confusion, unclarity, not fully loving yourself at the core, fighting your path and gifts, forcing something, running yourself ragged and all over the place without focus (too many irons in the fire), challenged with boundaries, being in martyr or victim roles, trying to change others, trying to prove something, being out of balance…..all create an inability for your adrenals to cope with the load.
And for some, our endurance levels are higher and so we can go for a long time thinking everything’s alright, but then suddenly crash. That’s the more sneaky, challenging kind of adrenal depletion because we easily mask the symptoms and messages with our abilities to overcome, sustain with our other gifts, and fuel ourselves with energy from other sources, but never really building ourselves up, but maintaining us at a coping level that is spiraling and soon to be out of control or worse.
I’m not a doctor, medical intuitive, or any practitioner of medicine whether western or naturopathic, so my share is simply from personal experience and observation, but I have suffered from adrenal fatigue and have turned my predisposition to it into a gift.
I have, like many others, adrenal sensitivity which I was born with that will always need to be high on my radar or major crashes can, and have happened.
I lived with the symptoms of it, not knowing what it was, but did become aware in my early twenties of my having a very high level of nervous anxiety and stress that was both a symptom of my extreme sensitivity to energies I absorbed all around me since infant stage, and to my personal challenges around that, not to mention factors playing out around performing at a certain level, trying to appease others to create a harmonious environment, which was something I learned also very early on as a child to do while I observed how dynamics worked out and how I could “fix” them.
The thing is, that wasn’t a fix. It was only masking the issues.
I also had the high endurance and strength levels that carried me forward and kept pushing on.
But it came at the detriment to myself, always feeling acidic in my stomach, going through bouts of acne as a result throughout those years (now completely gone), fatigue, and then crashing.
The crashing came after years of it. So yes, you can go on for a while, but why would you want to? As by the time you crash, for those with high levels of endurance, this really means you’re in a very depleted place and the adrenals will need a long time to rebalance and readjust in order to fully recover again.
And adrenal depletion will result in so many symptoms and a spiraling effect of other health challenges if not tended to.
And unfortunately, for myself, and I know for others, once you feel you’ve recovered, you tend to go back to the same way of life again, unless you decide to stop the spiral once and for all and focus on how to correct things at the core.
I’m happy to say that I no longer experience the effects of adrenal fatigue and it’s been because of a lifelong journey and commitment.
I’d been told by naturopathic doctors that it would be a lifelong battle, and I would have to manage and maintain it with herbs constantly.
I came to accept that and believe what they said, which only put me further into a victim role and that I could never really be in control of my health. Used it as my “excuse” in a way, or keeping me from fully being whole. And although I accepted that and learned to love it as a gift, I felt still that I could go beyond this and not define that as part of my wholeness, but simply a part of my story to wholeness that I was rewriting.
Each time I went to a naturopathic doctor and they gave me a protocol, while also discussing underlying roots, they were surprised at how quickly I turned it around. But then I’d fall back again after a couple of years.
Until, I really got it at the core.
Everyone will be different, but for me, the difference was in the commitment to myself.
Changing my lifestyle, changing the way I thought, felt, and acted as a result.
Focusing on living only from pure expression of my essence integrity and what I “needed” as the breath of life to me to bring forth through everything I did.
Learning how to create and have stronger boundaries…saying yes and no very clearly.
Releasing myself more and more from past patterns I’d identified from past life, childhood, genetic predisposition, and DNA conditioning.
Letting go of the word service and just being me.
Not pushing myself, relaxing into divine timing, trusting that what I do is enough and is perfect despite devised ideas of what I “should” be doing or performing as.
Finding my own definition of success.
Living a balanced life and immersing fully into nature.
Taking time for me so I have a deep fortified well to give authentically and responsibly from.
My diet has always been good and clean eating 100% vegan for nearly 11 years now, but changing from even being tight and strict with it in terms of only eating the cleanest of these types of foods, but rather living more flowing and by my intuition (continuing to eat 100% vegan, but whatever I desired including fun vegan goodies). This to include eating in a more balanced way that helped decrease my sensitivities because of ONLY eating clean, plus eating more relaxed and naturally, drawing me to a balance and not living in a mindset of if I dirty up my diet that I have to make up for it. No pushing or punishment. No binge and then deprive….Just pure flow.
Fully loving myself and not just saying the words.
Following my passions and singing my song.
Flowing with life and aligning with it rather than trying to control it.
Seeing everything as a gift and turning triggers into alchemy.
Knowing what is my stuff and what is not.
Being honest with myself, learning to live more from pure observation, and more by example.
Embodying my beliefs and nurturing what strengthens that.
And so on….
I’m grateful to say I’ve been able to stop taking the adrenal herbs and am still balanced and without fatigue or any symptoms I used to have, but instead live with increased vitality and inspiration and finally have that peace inside and out – alkalinity of mind, body, heart, and soul has returned.
I tried it as an experiment, as I do believe that if we thoroughly work from the core, we CAN find our way back to balance. And it has proven my theory, at least for me.
That as long as I continue in this vein, and put balance and harmony of being at the forefront of my life, then my body will find its natural balance.
And if ever something slightly shows up, rather than wait until it gets worse and ignore it, to pay attention, be ultra present, and immediately make the adjustments where needed and this can change it around instantly. As our bodies are simply messengers with gifts to reveal to us a remembering of our true nature and of the balance required as its innate foundation.
A return to natural harmony is always available in our daily practice of choice and widening perspectives.
I don’t recommend doing anything without your own doctor’s approval, as again I’m NO doctor.
I just constantly am working with energies at the metaphysical level and finding my way back to me.
If you suffer from high levels of stress, perhaps you may want to add into your protocol, a thorough visit into your own patterns and work from the inside out to rebalance mind, body, heart, and soul as a holistic way of being.
Adrenal fatigue is your ticket to you. Remember who you really are.
And as a result, the more of us that remember and embody that, the world will reflect it in greater proportions too.
Just like humans with blood flowing through our veins, trees have their own vascular system of flowing sugary liquid filled with water, nutrients, hormones, and minerals known as sap. Trees don’t typically leak sap unless damaged in some way for instance by a cut made in its trunk or due to bacterial infection for instance. And yet, this golden life source and healing tears are so beautiful when exposed vulnerably. Perhaps, once again, Nature shows us how exposing our own mysterious depths is rich with beauty and simply a way to know our wholeness and how we are divine harmony manifest.
Nature is rich with layers and textures of expression, just as each of us uniquely are. The difference being that nature doesn’t judge any of it…. she embraces it all as an extension of wholeness.
How can you release some of your inner judgments about yourself more today and embrace the nature of you?
I’m heading out in a few hours for a long weekend through Monday and will not be posting while I’m away. Taking some time off in the mountains and snow, skiing, snow-shoeing and relaxing. Taking all the little ones along for the fun and perhaps I’ll have a good story to share when I return, as being a neutral zone it may be opportune time to start face-to-face bonding with Joy and Cosmo. 🙂
In the mean time, a message I want to share comes from Cosmo in fact.
In the evenings I spend time with him doing his physical therapy with the cart, walking around while I support him, and his extension exercises. After, we lay on a towel on the floor together and just snuggle after all his hard work.
And the thing that hits me the most about him is his message of pure love and joy. He is SO happy…ALL of the time. He is not stuck in sadness of his situation, nor does he perceive there to be a situation worth dwelling over. The perceived limitation others may feel sad about in observing him, is not on his radar. He simply is grateful for what he has and the love he gets to share and receive.
I can’t tell you how much he moves me because of this. He just trucks on and doesn’t let anything stop him from seeing how much there is to be grateful for and how precious what he does have is to cherish.
And for rabbits, this is a feat in its own, as they are so sensitive and fragile and can easily go into a state of pain and sadness where they huddle in a ball and do not want to eat or do anything…They simply give up or wait out the pains and struggles.
But I’ve seen this time and time again with humans as well. It always seems that the people who have what others would consider huge disadvantages, are the ones who are teaching us the most about love, belief, gratitude, and strength. They live life with the knowing that they are whole, abundant, and perfect just as they are, and that there is nothing they can’t achieve if they keep on believing. These people are awe-inspiring and instantly make you realize that all of the challenges you are experiencing can be seen as gifts to rise to the occasion.
It’s interesting that in his medical records, a previous veterinarian had written that he has a plump heart – that it’s a bit larger than normal (and might need meds down the road because of this). I find this symbolically interesting, as perhaps it is evidence that the more you love and the more you expand and deepen your heart, the more your life will be enriched.
So, to everyone who feels down and out, I hope this is a seed to inspire you.
I know for me right now Cosmo is my personal hero. No matter what the day greets him with, he is there with open heart, joy, peace, and a lot of loving licks!