Today’s Winter Solstice (for the Northern Hemisphere – Summer Solstice for the Southern Hemisphere) is imbued with rich possibility, accentuated by the Great Conjunction of Jupiter and Saturn forming a rare Christmas Star. These two planets will be the closest they’ve been in 800 years. Innovative Aquarian energy has anchored as well, and so there is a fresh reset for humanity at hand.
Winter Solstice celebrates a return to light and provides a regenerative portal to honor the remembrance of this light that you are, for making those leaps in consciousness by moving within to shine your own light even when no one else around you is, and to “see the light” even when things get dark and you’re unsure of what to do, where to go, or even how to think or feel.
Through inward focus you can receive insightful guidance on the months and year ahead. Perhaps you might envision the light and inner fire of your heart and soul expanding and filling your entire body and emanating out and joining with the light of our Great Central Sun, allowing yourself to take up more space and be who you really are.
We need each of you standing in essence, more than ever.
This quietude and dreamtime mirrors the germinating seeds lying under Earth’s winter-kissed skin. Nature awaits renewal in the stillness of brisk air and clear stars. While much seems asleep, everything is percolating.
Today I offer you this visual spell I was guided to create as a way to help activate the light within. I stepped into essence and the child I was born on Earth to be, recapturing the dance and song I used to share as a little girl to all who visited us. There was a time I would tell stories through my dance and the music moving through my spirit – it was an energetic dance shared heart to heart.
The root of my name, Tania, comes from Titania – The Faery Queen. I was born a Winter February baby and with Jupiter and Venus in Aquarius, the energetic landscape upon us feels right at home.
From the essence of which I was named and that I be, I drop into my heart and spread love and harmony throughout the land.
It is my hope we remember and embody the nature of kindness and compassion, come to live with each other, every living being, and Earth’s realms in true cocreative partnership, and open our hearts to the creative magick within each of us to manifest new realities for the highest good of all concerned.
Along with the visual spell, here is a Winter Solstice Spell from Ben and Christina of Wytch Wood (my favorite Vermont Magick Maple Creators):
Winter Solstice Spell
Winter is here, and as I light my space,
Bring forth only love and peace in my place.
Accept my Yuletide offerings to help my wishes come true,
May there be wisdom in all I do.
Abundance flows generously, to me and through me,
I place blessings and love to all beings on land and sea.
Earth Spirit, this is the year’s last cycle learning,
And I welcome the next season turning.
My candles are burning free,
as the sun returns, so it shall be.
Blessed Be and So it is.
It’s no surprise to me that today’s share from Astrid falls on this incredible Solstice line-up to include a Cancer Full Moon and Ursid meteor shower. Rabbits have long been associated with the Moon and, in fact, many ancient stories tell of the rabbit on the Moon that you can actually see when She’s at her fullest. I find it fascinating how on this longest night of the year that we’ll have incredible illumination and cosmic alignments galore, as the Full Moon will peak tomorrow morning of the 22nd AND tonight we are also going to be able to see Mercury and Jupiter in conjunction within this Yule’s Long Night’s Moon sky to add to those shooting stars.
Winter Solstice celebrations of the first day of Winter in the Northern Hemisphere means Summer Solstice celebrations for those of you in the Southern Hemisphere. Again, a very cool link for Astrid, as she came home with me on Summer Solstice – a day shared by the transition of my beloved rabbit, Joy.
And Winter Solstice, two years ago, was a day my sweet rabbit, Cosmo, had chosen for some of his ashes to be spread here in Lake Tahoe.
So, I’m seeing a lot of wholeness around this, which makes sense as the Winter Solstice embodies the energy of conclusion along with a time for rest, self-reflection, self-care, and “being the light” – something rabbits are very adept at in being masterful navigators of the dark.
I’ve noticed Astrid spending extra time in her castle tunnels lately, as she demonstrates this time to cozy up and journey the inner labyrinths of our emotions, beliefs, fears, and patterns so we can make adjustments for bringing in and embodying the new and potentials we envision and feel calling to our hearts.
“There is value in journeying the depths of your heart,” she says.
The seasons remind you of the ever-shifting and flowing cycles of life, change, and potential to honor and make space for. Winter Solstice reminds you of the light that you are, as a gateway of sacred reverence for a “return to light” in general.
Astrid reminds you that your 3D circumstances and stories do not define you. She encourages you to open your heart more and be willing to take up more space while beaming out the glow of who you really are.
“If I relinquished to simply being seen as a little, round ball of bunny fluff I would never know the true and full power of my inner rabbit. Looks can be deceiving, but if you believe in that limited illusion then you won’t experience the full spectrum embodied in the coin of being. Remember there are two sides to it, but you’re not limited to one or the other. There is simply the coin that can flip in and out of experiences at will, never being less of the whole at any time,” she says.
So, as the holiday season flashes through with a flurry of hustle and bustle, Astrid wants you to tune into your inner rabbit and honor your needs with some extra nurturing during a time when you are feeling tugged to do more outside of yourself. This will create balance and help you to find that peaceful center amidst everything around you. It also helps you to anchor more into your wholeness and all of the potentials available for how you experience things and are experienced, yourself, by others.
The Full Moon feels at home in Cancer and this lends to the ability to do some beautiful movement on the inner landscape that can help you make those bunny leaps into the New Year. An opportune time for embracing your feelings, allowing healthy emotional release, communicating from the heart, and experience a cleansing and freeing up of space, as you are supported in shedding light on the dark crevices within.
I know how Astrid and I will be spending this cozying up Cancer Full Moontime, as I return to one of my most beloved childhood stories – Watership Down – this weekend.
Astrid’s eyes get bigger and she sits up to nudge my ankle, as I write this.
I read the novel in 6th grade as part of our curriculum and was transformed by it, falling in love with the rabbits and the movie, as well. It has long been a favorite for me so when my sweet friend, Kelly, told me it was coming out again, the little girl inside of me was over-the-Moon excited. I keep mentioning it every day, actually, and it’s finally almost here.
Originally set for release on the 25th/Christmas, Watership Down is a new BBC series starting the 22nd and will hit Netflix on the 23rd in two feature-length episodes.
I feel its message is quite fitting for these times and its release is quite aligned with things unfolding in my new world.
Before I conclude with a dream Astrid wants me to share, she also reminds me of all of the sightings and alignments that have recently been taking place here. She wants me to mention these, as a way for others to also recognize the constant messaging reflected to us even when we think we are alone and not receiving answers. And also because she knows our experiences are collectively connected, like a warren, and there may be something ignited by these reminders.
“Nature is especially supportive to your journey,” Astrid shares, “as She mirrors with raw reflection the answers you search for and in some cases for many of you, yearn for.”
Lately, I’ve had a lot more different wildlife sightings than usual. For the first time, recently on Thanksgiving, we’d seen a raccoon just across and down from our house and yesterday I saw another – this time one that had been hit by a car on the side of the road. We haven’t seen raccoons in all of the years we’ve lived here so both of these feel significant, including the full life cycling as well, as we approach the end of the year and this longest night before days expand.
Coyotes have been on ultra high around our house, too. Several individuals have crossed the street in front of our car as we turn the curve at the Sherwood sign recently (I always say we live at the edge of the Sherwood Forest). And two large coyotes that looked like wolves went right by the edge of our back deck one night, as if circling the perimeter of our home.
Then, of course, the four deer at our back deck and side yard on 11/11 for our first sighting at this house.
But yesterday, along with the transitioned raccoon, I also saw bald eagle for the first time in months and a cool sighting of wild mustangs.
This all took place on a day I decided to forego my usual schedule and go down to Reno instead, feeling called to shift things. I was contemplating the change and how it felt aligned with my feelings, guidance, and going much deeper into my work after setting things up to nurture that.
As I began my drive suddenly bald eagle appeared confirming what I was affirming in my mind and heart. She soared toward me and above, following the lake’s shoreline, as I was. I could see her white head clearly, guiding her dark, massive body across the sky. She heralds taking to flight, greater personal freedom, and going further with courageous steps, as she can see ahead the possibilities and renewal even if I can’t.
And in the valley below, I saw wild mustangs for the third time now, but rather than them grazing near Washoe Lake, they were in a single-filed line wading through the lake at hip level, which was a beautiful sight to see.
A lot of feeling confirmations and moving through the watery energies of this Cancer Moon reflected – all connected with inner trust and being willing to examine what is moving through.
A raw, freeing energy seems embodied in all of the sightings – even with the sad physical death sighting of the raccoon.
I definitely have been feeling nudges with several things and the need to make the next moves and changes. Driving always is meditative in this regard, where I solidify answers and confirm my intentions.
Astrid is always on my mind when I drive and I smile in my heart with each sighting, knowing she is experiencing it with me where ever I am.
Later yesterday evening I was messaged by a friend and artisan that I’d commissioned back at the beginning of September to create a special piece for me connected to my projects as a way of manifesting the visions. There had been no rush, as I believe in perfect unfolding and wow, was it ever.
She sent me photos of the creation she was making for me and said it would be done that night and sent out the next day – and it was!
Of course, this was magickal with its birthing happening for the Solstice and Full Moon. Not just because of the timing, but because of even the details of the creation that were so fitting – some of which she did through her own inspiration of my energetic description.
This piece happens to be a cosmic dragon, that embodies the essence of the Cosmos. She is of Aurora Borealis coloring, star-dusted, and golden star encrusted, holding a silver crescent Moon up with her tail – that has planets embedded along the spine in cosmic alignment. And upon the Moon sits a little white rabbit, while another rabbit sits on the back of the dragon reaching up in sacred connection with it.
Talk about synchronicity with the Solstice Full Moon, Meteor Shower, and Mercury and Jupiter conjunction.
Oh, how the Universe works in mystical and magickal ways.
Astrid is smiling hugely as I share all of this and she had made her way to me when I was receiving this news and the photos to ensure I knew her magickal part in all of it. 🙂
She now asks me to add the dream.
So, just two nights ago Astrid appeared in my dream landscape. She’s been hopping in lately even if I don’t always share about it. But this one was potent with its timing and so I’m not surprised she wants me to share it.
In the dream Astrid was with me and we came upon a place the Earth was opening up below us. A deep hole, jagged with rocks appeared and suddenly Astrid went hurdling down it. I couldn’t see how it happened, but there was a deliberate energy around it. I peered down and saw her laying on the ground. I was so worried she was hurt or worse, but she stands up and brushes herself off. She takes a moment working out her legs and such, shaking it off, and seems to be okay after wiggling her body back.
I contemplate how I will get her when suddenly creatures of inner Earth start to approach. First as shadows and then closing in on her from the left. They are almost like wolves, but something more.
I can hear her in my heart and know she’s about to take off, and she does. She darts off to the right down one of the tunnels and the creatures follow.
I hear the invitation and know I must journey into inner Earth and her womb to follow her. In my mind, to save her, but I gather Astrid intends much more than that.
She seems not afraid or worried that they will catch her, but I’m not as certain – my mothering instincts setting in to protect her.
But I also feel the call of the adventure, and Astrid is asking of me much more than simply to save her…she wants me to join her on the journey.
I, and she, know I have no choice because love guides me above all else, and gives me the courage.
Two dear and powerful shamanic friends of mine show up as if they know of this expedition already and come with tools of their gifts to join the mission in this underground system of warren tunnels within Earth’s core.
So the three of us devoted women head off together, down the rabbit hole.
Wishing you all a peace-filled Solstice journey into the light of your heart.
I’ve been immersed in house stuff here in an all-consuming way these days, but am beginning to see the light and space is opening for more. Yesterday a lot of major things came to closure with the house, including the end of a 4 1/2 day stint my mom put in to help me out with the hardest stuff here. We still have a couple of last big projects to finalize and then some last minute tie-ins, but we’re almost there and the days of having several teams of contractors in the house all at once are over. Holding the peace within chaos will now simply settle into pure peace.
And the timing couldn’t be more perfect, as winds started blowing in a little storm last night and this morning we woke to it snowing, perfectly timed to create a wonderland for Winter Solstice tomorrow. Timing all around truly is aligned for Christmas gifts galore and our having some stillness and relaxing for the holiday and New Year.
The seasons remind you of the ever-shifting and flowing cycles of life, change, and potential to honor and make space for. Winter Solstice reminds you of the light that you are, as a gateway of sacred reverence for a “return to light” in general.
I find it perfect that our fireplace is 95% complete, and will be finalized tomorrow on the Solstice…wonderful way to ring in this change of season with the flame of warmth and inner truth.
You can visualize this as well in seeing the light and inner fire of your heart and soul expanding and filling your entire body and emanating out and joining with the light of our Great Central Sun, allowing yourself to take up more space and be who you really are.
This entire home remodeling project definitely mirrors, to me, a support to that – being “me” – and the ending of the old and the onset of the new, as well as that movement inward at this time of year to do anchor in things that will be blossoming soon.
I’m super grateful to my mom who always comes to the rescue to help whenever I have moved over the years. She’s helped with all moves except the one from house to RV – Magick Bus – and back to house after that journey. We always get tons done quickly and inhumanly at times – all the while laughing along the way. We are definitely a two-Faery team that moves mountains! There’s nothing we can’t do.
I’m especially excited because my new office/Faery/Bunny Magick Room is 90% complete, which means I’ll be in action here shortly again – full throttle! Loving how it’s come together and how Astrid’s things are looking. I haven’t introduced her to it yet because I’d like it all complete before that. Plus, her new abode and things are meant as Christmas gifts to her. So the timing should be perfect for the big reveal on that to her too!
I’ll share photos when things are complete. I’m looking forward to getting back to my creative projects and especially full time on my book.
I was able to jump into it twice recently, which felt really good and got Astrid all excited, as she sat by my feet nosing me the whole time and acting as my little helper and guardian to ensure no one bothered me.
She’s been shifting a lot again lately, which is fun to see. Getting super interactive, snuggly, and doing her work moving energy through the house. With my mom here a few days she was also able to connect more with her Grandma, which was sweet so they have a stronger channel of communication between them now.
Reading my story from the Forest Portal felt oh so good. I could sense the energy difference and also how that will help with the editing process for sure. Other than getting our house in shape, my book is the most important project to me.
My loved ones, learning to anchor in more peace and more harmony, communing with Nature, tuning into the Cosmos, and being more and more me are my greatest joys and focuses these days.
That’s a little update here from the Forest Portal and how things are aligning and shaping up for the Solstice, Christmas, and the New Year. We’ll be spending Christmas at my family’s house and I’ll be continuing to finalize and anchor in things here so the New Year will be fresh and fertile for the new.
Wishing everyone an inner illuminating, peace and harmony filled Winter Solstice.
Yesterday’s Winter Solstice truly was a portal shifting one reality into another with so many truly magickal events culminating all in the same day that all went beautifully and couldn’t have aligned more perfectly. I wasn’t the only one who had felt this was going to be a powerful transition time and indeed it was. Not to mention had synchronous mergings all around.
I also felt that my bunny loves would have a hand in it all and so they did.
Without going into too much detail, yesterday not only saw an era end and begin with the Magick Bus being purchased by the most lovely couple and perfect new family for her, but saw Dave’s dad through a very successful surgery, there were two very special events that took place and were celebrated with a birthday and a union, my parents and we had some solidification of new anchored, we received more clarity on our living/housing situation, snow faery flurries of snow started off the day and created a wonderland fit for the Solstice, I created a Winter Solstice crystal grid with new crystals that will be utilized in some upcoming cosmic/faery/shamanic creations (this was a way to activate them set with the backdrop of the perfect Christmas card my parents gave me, as you can see having the words “A Gift…A Joy…A Miracle”):
I had prophetic dreams the night before of one of the events that took place and had smelled what seemed like roses and carnations (some kind of flowers for sure – the floral fragrance was so strong) wafting in the air during the time it was to happen that no one else could smell around me even though I was no where near the event (this felt like timelines merging and portals accessed), and I found the perfect private beach in Zephyr Cove (perfect name too) for some of Cosmo’s ashes to be spread on the lake per his wishes on this day, as his beloved Joy and dear friend Nestor had had theirs.
I even found confirming gifts of a white quartz stone shaped like a heart, and a lovely feather, on the beach just before reaching the stone pools where I lovingly dusted 5 small pinches of Cosmo’s Earthly beingness into a sacred little pool created by some of the beautiful, prehistoric rock formations of the lake.
There were other tie-ins with Cosmo and the Magick bus that made this day and events around these, to be much more than just symbolic, but also divinely orchestrated.
But back briefly to the Magick Bus. Dave and I never attached to any one person who would contact us to see her, as we knew when things were right they would just happen magickally. Plus, I’d already done a Reiki healing attunement on it all, so there was no reason to think in that way.
That said, I did have this sense that since these people wanted to see it on the Solstice, were driving all the way from Santa Rosa (4 hours away), which was the same place where the people who flew down and bought my Hunab Ku SUV outright for the exact price I asked were from, and I had the intention it would go before the end of the year, and maybe even before we left for our Christmas trip, it did seem auspicious.
Not to mention, it was the day I had Cosmo’s ashes with us and he and Joy had been actively working on bringing the right people to her.
My next indication was when the woman and I immediately learned that we shared the same favorite number and have had it our favorite since childhood – the number 5, which also so happens to always be a sign and message of confirmation from my beloved Nestor.
And more synchronicities came up during our conversations with the couple, which were uncanny. Then we were surprised by them offering us the exact amount we were asking, which had been the same with my car.
We were all just so grateful, as not only had they searched a long time for the right RV home, but we had intended the right people who would love and care for her in the same way. And we all discovered how we shared being meticulous people and how that was what sold them and what also one of the things that made us feel the Magick Bus was in wonderful caring hands. Yay!
AND, on the way to where we have the Magick Bus stored, we saw 18 hawks, which make a 9 for endings, numerologically. Then after our shaking/hugging on the whole thing and leaving, we saw 1 hawk for new beginnings. 19 total, also creating the merging of endings and beginnings in its 1 and 9 combination, but when added equaling a 1 again.
Needless to say, it was a day of big celebrations all around, bitter sweetness, and wonderful endings and beginnings.
We are now en route (yes, another road trip – 8 hours this time and with the kitty babies along for the ride) since this early morning after Solstice to Southern California for a long Christmas celebration feeling full in heart with love and gratitude for the incredible gifts received for the highest good of all.
I took this photo this morning at 7:30 am right when we’d gotten on the road. It was such a mystical view of the sun behind golden veils of mist and snow clouds. So mysterious! At times you could see the full sun behind a very thin veil with a soft golden halo around, against white blankets of clouds and lighting the tips of the snow covered trees in lemony gold. Stunning!
I’m not sure I’ll have time to blog until we return home Monday the 26th, but if I do it will be a brief message of holiday wishes.
Until then, I hope you enjoy the beautiful photos of my Solstice magick, as I always love to spread the energetic vibes and love to each of you. A way to share life from my perspective and to connect us across space and time.
As I sit here watching the snow gently fall, creating magick all around me, I am in gratitude of the cycles and seasons of life that have brought me to this very moment. I’m also in awe of the perfection of this sweetness falling from the heavens like powdered sugar, in perfect creation of what will be a potent and memorable day. This Winter Solstice has been chosen by my beloved Cosmo as the day to spread some of his ashes upon the lake to join in alchemy with Joy’s and Nestor’s, igniting a sacred wave of shifts abound.
Other things are also taking place today and ending/beginning, so I will be reflecting upon and adding energy to the magickal brew a-stirring.
Today marks another new cycle and change of seasons as we welcome in the Winter Solstice (for the Northern Hemisphere and Summer Solstice for the Southern Hemisphere). This brings the end of the old year’s cycle, as we begin anew, and provides a supportive time to make leaps in consciousness by moving within to shine your light, as the light lessens on this shortest day/longest night of the year (or longest day of the year for you Southern Hemisphere folks).
We’ve been continuing to clear in preparation for new and more natural ways of living from our highest and likely you’ve been experiencing heightened awareness of all things in your life through varying ways of experiencing these, relative to each, and coming to feel more self alignment and merging taking place.
This is creating an upsurge of excitement, as you feel the energy field welcoming you into your truth more than ever.
Where ever you are in your journey, is perfect, and likely you have that sense, even if moving through the “ick” still, that there’s something different this time in the experience.
I simply would encourage you to let go, do what ever you can to maintain your own inner balance and harmony so that you can vibrate at your own relaxed and natural personal frequency, and compassionately realize that you are different than everyone else and therefore you only need to exercise your own sovereign free will and lovingly allow them to do the same.
More and more you will be experiencing, embodying, and emanating so much more light, which is not to be feared, but to be celebrated.
Through this Winter Solstice “gateway” you can be mindful of this turn of seasons to be more soul driven and may feel called to take some moments to honor this flowing change of life cycles. Perhaps creating a special sacred space or ritual act to honor the “return of light” that this Solstice is reminding us.
Candles and crystals come to mind when I think of ways you might symbolically create that space, or perhaps simply envisioning and imagining (imagination is a powerful tool) the light and inner fire of your heart and soul expanding and filling your entire body and emanating out and joining with the light of our Great Central Sun, allowing yourself to take up more space and be who you really are.
Winter Solstice provides a supportive time to honor the remembrance of light that you are, for making those leaps in consciousness by moving within to shine your own light, and to “see the light” even when things get dark and you’re unsure of what to do, where to go, or even how to think or feel.
There is so much potential available to each of you and it is up to each individual how you choose to embrace this or not. It’s an opportunity to completely reinvent yourself and your life and to do things more differently than ever before, which will take the courage of being willing to shine your light even if no one else around you is.
Childhood memories of myself as a ballerina and the passion I expressed through me with dance brings depth to the meaning of today’s “rebirthing of the Light” and life and spirit.
We all have the opportunity to courageously be born again like a seed of light, as we deepen into the stillness of the dark.
There is much hope and promise within remembering the heart of who I am and what was alive within me as a child. Some of what I/we may have forgotten.
There’s an integration that takes place and frees me even more when I reclaim those parts of my essence.
What this means to me is that what ever it is I do take action to bring forth in my life, the little girl within me will be dancing her heart out while doing it, as the dream is the reality I choose to live and nothing less than that.
Wishing you a liberating and enlightening Winter Solstice.
May your courage deepen and the creative impetus of transformation shine brightly within you.
As we near the end of the year and come upon some powerful energies this month that will be assisting our transition into a collective new dynamic for the coming 2017, I wanted to reflect a bit upon my own life, share vulnerably on these changes, and how some of this has played out for me to provide a perspective on some ways to utilize energies. I know it’s been a challenging year for many and I went through some of my own mourning with losses, yet they were in actuality reflections of the new being confirmed in arrival.
While collectively 2016 was a closure year numerologically holding the vibration of #9, for me it was actually my personal beginnings year, as a #1 since my birthday. So, coupling that with the collective, I was able to reclaim so many parts of myself, embraced the value of my individuality, taking action on supporting my needs and personal sovereignty, reviewed much and ended an era in my life, literally went through a rebirthing, and brought forth more of my truth I desire creating with from here on out, as I weeded through it all.
This included eradicating the old definitions of many things, including leaving behind the idea of “service” for a life of “being” for the highest good of all concerned.
For almost the first two months of 2017, I’ll share being in a #1 year with the collective, but come my birthday on 2/26 (a number I have seen in wild, nearly daily abundance this year as I’ve been rebirthing) I will step into the energy of a #2 year, which will bring me very deeply into a sacred feminine place that my sacred male I’ve been working on this last year, will be supporting.
A time where I listen completely within and support with action what moves through me. A time also when inner knowing aligns me with personal timing regardless of what others are doing, understanding when to make moves and when to wait. A time of heightened intuition, psychic energy, prophetic dreams, telepathy, and inner peace as beingness.
While things may appear to slow down since more is done within or in developmental phases this year for me, there will be significant movement forward and progress unfolding – all supported also by the collective #1 year.
The year for me will be focused on relationships of all kinds – the one with myself and my parts, with friends and beloveds, with business relationships, with life at large, and with All That Is. A time of collaborations, cooperation, and greater compassion that understands and values everyone’s differences.
It will be a year focused also on my own sense of reality and fine tuning that amidst a world of many other realities that my sensitivities will navigate me through in alignment with what I’ve learned in my #1 year about who I AM and knowing my boundaries more.
My inner will surface more than ever on the scene.
And this makes complete sense, since I am very focused on new creations right now that I’m being guided to bring forth and that speak to my deepest passions and essence. So it is all coming from a very deep place within me.
And here’s a little review on how my #9 and #1 year brought me here, to give you an idea of how this process has translated for me.
In brief, during my #9 year I literally felt walls closing in on me. I was left uninspired, felt trapped, knew things had passed their peak, and that everything I’d been doing had run its course, including where I lived.
Regardless of how this sounds I’ll share anyway, that I began receiving many cosmic visitations, clear messages, and an invitation to move beyond my life here if I so desired. I went through cosmic upgrades and rewiring, and understood I’d completed much more than just an Earthly cycle I’d been working on, but soul cycle in general.
I knew I had to choose and new inspiration came in that I understood would be one way I could recreate my life….in came the Magick Bus at the exact mid point of my #9 year. It took until the beginning of 2016 to fully get underway and leave Orange County altogether so I spent the end of that year moving out of our house and into the rv, selling my car, simplifying down to the bare basics and essentials I valued, and awaited divine timing that kept supporting this venture magickally into being when others had no idea how. And everything very rapidly aligned with this embrace and choice to support this rebirthing.
The little over a year spent on our rv journey during my #1 year, was a literal huge movement of energy in my life, and both reinvigorated me and literally saved my life in terms of giving me reason to choose to continue on here. But it would have to be in a 100% completely new way. And so I spent all of my time focused on knowing myself, fully immersing in nature to know the nature of me, and one-by-one let go of everything I kept understanding needed releasing.
Yet, I also richly received so many gifts – the greatest in reclaiming myself and strengthening my relationship to the purity of that above all else. In essence, raising my vibration more and more – a constant evolution I focus on and keep digging to reveal.
And again, at the half way point of my #1 year, something big took place, this time a very literal rebirthing that took me through a death cycle that washed away the old and helped me reclaim an even stronger sense of empowerment.
I’ve eluded to the incident in past posts, and while I won’t go into details of the experience, as it is much too layered and involved in complex ways I am guided not to discuss because of larger ramifications, I did have a treacherous incident one day both in a glacial river and wild deep forest where a new me stepped out of it all and has not been the same since.
One could say that the cosmic waters from which my Pisces nature is born of, were the very waters that cleansed and rebirthed me.
And I have found myself experiencing life through very different eyes, hearing with new ears, feeling with heightened sensitivities, and expanding with a deepened heart.
I am not the same and yet more so me.
I’ve increasingly made harmony with my past and with what ever and who ever comes around me and understand that from that place I needn’t fight, but hold strong to my vibration, which does the work for me.
What comes around is in alignment, or provides me the opportunity to translate what I learn in greater ways of actual beingness. And therefore things shift instantly when I put that to action and come and go as is perfect. Not as a result of hiding or fighting, but in learning to be more me, creating my own reality that allows me to perceive everything differently, and coming daily more and more from my heart.
As there’s no limit to how far one can go with that.
Struggle only arrives if working against our nature and the energetic field of experience flowing through.
And so, I am utilizing the end of this year, tomorrow’s Full Moon, upcoming Winter Solstice and Mercury Retrograde, the Capricorn energy (my rising sign/ascendant and North Node to guide the next phase of my life), and the transitions of collective energies with the New Year alongside energetic dynamics at work to strengthen all of this and support all that I have in motion into greater manifestation.
This to include my mourning process with Joy and Cosmo who have confirmed the closure of one life fully into a new one for me that has been rooting.
This confirmed again recently with Thanksgiving’s sightings of the 27 hawks and dead owl within 35 minutes, the magickal alignment of the amazing place we’re currently living in, prophetic dream sequences, and literal signs over Lake Tahoe’s portal from my view of it here that included the Arcturian symbol I wear as a sacred tattoo, rainbow portals, and shooting stars. Not to mention, the resurgence of things in a new way and the departure of things, effortlessly.
This time period will continue to clarify and ground things as I focus only on the new projects and my life path I’ve chosen to move forward with.
So I’ll remain immersed in my writing, which is like literally rewriting my life as I do in a way, and receive nature’s reflections.
Returning to Southern California for Christmas will also be like a solidification of closure with our old way of life there, as I return as the new me and we stay in a different location that actually was one we began with on our rv journey, near Malibu.
Even being here in Tahoe has reclaimed the original essence of what this place was for both Dave and I that has rewritten the history we had here and created a new reality and experience of it that is completely new from what once was – a place we both went through symbolic deaths, now providing more rebirthing to my literal one.
And that brings me to sharing about the collective energies, so that you can weave your own experiences into the unfolding realities you choose to create, while putting closure to this year.
The Gemini Full Moon (the Twins) represents the Yin and Yang in balanced harmony and rhythmical dance together and illuminates relationships with others and with the parts of yourself. It’s about sharing and communicating, as well as the day-to-day practicalities and logical curiosity. While Sagittarius brings expansion, creativity, intuition, freedom, and dream energy. This Full Moon in Gemini with Sun in Sagittarius speaks to using both sides of the brain in partnership, which will support you in being able to manifest your heart’s desires and create those extraordinary things you dream of.
Mercury has been slowing down too in preparation for the retrograde on the 19th. This offers a very powerfully transformative period to harness before the new beginnings year of 2017 begins. A time for digging deep and bringing forth your truth. And with Mercury being in Capricorn brings a personal responsibility to the forefront, and rebuilding structures, clearing out and creating sustainable, strengthened stability of Earthiness to your life from the core out.
Lots of releasing, restructuring, reclaiming, and rewriting, as you realize who you really are.
Capricorn also focuses energies on the male patriarchy, the old and new male in process of transmutation, father figures in our lives, and our own sacred male in his truest, authentic power who supports our sacred female into hers.
Capricorn begins on the 21st, Winter Solstice, which puts focus on you being the light and shining brighter in the face of shadowy turbulence. The presence of darkness and your having embraced its beauty and gifts, now can empower you into greater wholeness because of understanding and harnessing this alchemy.
The productive and healthy aspects of the masculine are highlighted now (while the old has fully surfaced into awareness) and are in need of compassion, and integrating and bringing him to the foreground in equal partnership with the productive and healing aspects of the feminine for wholeness.
Relationships are a reflection of your relationship with yourself and the work you do within.
So nurture yourself and strengthen your physical body, as it is the vehicle to bring forth all that is within you that you desire to create. It is also the reflection of how you’re cultivating your inner world, being indicative of where to makes shifts.
By listening within and being vulnerable with yourself and others, your true power will shine forth and your inner male and female parts can understand each other’s needs, which can turn reactions into conscious, partnered responses.
An amazing year of potentials awaits us all.
Yesterday we celebrated the holiday season and welcoming of today’s Winter Solstice here in the Northern Hemisphere with a family gathering enjoying The Nutcracker ballet performance at Segerstrom Center for the Arts.
It was quite the production with over 100 performers, elaborate sets, and costumes.
And it was quite enjoyable – for me nostalgic and deeply triggering and healing.
Our going was in large part chosen to entertain our little 3 1/2 year old niece, Violet, who is currently taking some ballet classes and has a thing for princesses, ballet dancers, and faeries.
However, although unbeknownst to them, it turned out to be important for me too.
We were also gifted a behind-the-scenes tour after, of the sets and costumes, as Violet’s mom is dear family friends (since she was a baby) with a woman in charge of costumes for The American Ballet Theatre productions – Hillary.
So it was quite a treat all around for us kids at heart. 😉
While walking to the event from the parking lot I started recounting my own childhood growing up as a little girl dancing and singing – something done both at home and outside of the home, performing for anyone who wanted a little faery magick.
Alongside being in a choir with my brother for a church we weren’t members of, but that welcomed us to sing in nonetheless at the request of parents wanting us to experience music as they had enjoyed, I also was a little dancer.
I used to take ballet lessons between the ages of 3 and 6, unfortunately ceasing when we moved from our apartment in Pasadena to our new home in Diamond Bar.
It was something I greatly loved, seriously was engaged in skillfully executing even at that young age, and ended up being really good at, always being chosen as leads, ending our daily practice routine as the principal, and yes, was cast as Clara in The Nutcracker for our performance.
I even had my own Nutcracker, which was used in that performance of mine and became my “prince” and “boyfriend” when I was a little girl – staying with me always.
I’d even give him a kiss now and then.
My parents still have this Nutcracker as part of their Christmas collection that has grown quite a bit since.
I have memories of this time period and still often ask my mom why I didn’t continue with ballet when we moved.
The answers that she surmises, but can’t remember, are just that everything was new, they didn’t think of searching out a place where we lived (it had been more convenient in Pasadena), and with starting a new school, perhaps they thought it was too much for me?
I often wonder if I asked about it back then…but neither of us remember.
I do know that a lot changed when we moved and what had been worn more on my sleeve as my essence, began to retreat into the background.
This taking years to diligently bring back out once again.
Going to see the performance yesterday, reminded me of how I shined my light as a little girl on that stage…no inhibitions…just singing and dancing from my heart and being the little faery that I was.
I even had this little energy dance I would do for guests at our home where I would dance expressively and used my hands very close to them, as if sprinkling enchantment.
It was done with this sense of maturity of understanding, as if I was consciously with each gesture, speaking/healing through my body and intentions, although it was normal to me and what I just knew to do. There was no thought about it and creating intentions.
It was a matter of just being.
I was telling Dave about this and was curiously exploring the way things evolved, as they do for us all.
And then it happened.
I’d been enjoying the lovely performance and was swept away with the beautiful snowflake and flower ballerinas and the music that I so remembered, but nearing the end I was hit with tears that swelled inside my heart in my chest and filled my eyes to the brim.
I’d never cried at a ballet and don’t remember doing so at any musical either. Movements at the symphony have touched me before to tears, but The Nutcracker?
This is such an enchanting story and while yes, to awaken from a dream you don’t want to end may be sad, there’s nothing lost in the story, as dream and reality merge through the heart of Clara’s love and the magick continues.
It was obvious to me I’d struck a chord…a very deep one.
Especially being that there wasn’t any specific thing I could point my finger at that was happening in a way that moved me to that kind of emotion from what I was seeing.
It was what was being moved THROUGH me that was taking place.
Perhaps I’d found yet another layer of myself.
And although not one I haven’t been aware of, perhaps more connecting of dots and another deepening into it, as I can continue to peel layers and dig roots even further along the journey.
There was a sense of coming full circle, peaceful closure, a relaxing more into my essence, reclaiming the deepest aspect of myself more richly, and the reminder that nothing is truly lost, as it’s always been right there inside and awaiting.
It was fun to watch little Violet curiously asking about all of the costumes with that child like wonder. It was fun to see her dance and bow from the aisle in front of her seat, as she watched the performance.
And it really brought depth to the meaning of today’s “rebirthing of the Light” and life and spirit.
We all have the opportunity to courageously be born again like a seed of light, as we deepen in to the stillness of the dark.
There was a bitter sweetness in those healing tears yesterday, but much hope and much promise within remembering.
I can’t find the words to describe what happened…what I felt.
It just is.
And I know it was another powerful integration that, like my yellow butterfly friend (who since my earlier post this morning has now visited me a THIRD time in the RV), has freed me even more.
Does it mean I’m going to go out and become a ballerina?
Although if I wanted, of course I can go take classes again and do anything I desire and dream of.
We all can.
What it means is that what ever it is I do, the little girl within me will be dancing her heart out, as the dream is the reality I choose to live and nothing less than that.
Wishing you a liberating and enlightening Winter Solstice.
May your courage deepen and the creative impetus of transformation shine brightly within you.
Although we’re living in a mobile tiny house, I’ve still been nesting and incubating within the small sanctuary of The Magick Bus and feel a deepening increasing with that, ironically, with the more time that passes from my returning to the world. Lol!
Our inner sanctum here is cozy and filled with love and a few magickal things, not to mention, magickal little ones. 🙂
Somehow it’s been seen to that just the right few additions would find their way here to assist and align the energy, rounding out the recipe of alchemical ingredients.
I’ve been so grateful for the sweet gifts that have come to join our domain in the form of magick rabbits, Ganesh, garden delights, and Tarot fun – from a couple of friends, from a company that “randomly” sent me a free gift, as well as a few from myself to create the nurturing environment that feeds my soul and sparks inspiration.
They’ve all found their perfect place and feels complete, as there is no room for more.
Each of the things have their special energy they are supporting, but my Tarot decks have been a fresh infusion of fun and reflection when I want a quick break or simple check-in.
I used to have quite a few decks…maybe 20 or so, but only was guided to take 2 of them along for this journey and put the rest in our small storage of things for later. These 2 felt most aligned, but recently I got that some new energy needed to come in, so I was drawn to get 3 more, leaving me with 5 decks now on The Magick Bus – my favorite number.
Among the three are an Earth Magic and Faery Oracle deck and Cosmic Tarot deck.
I’m really loving them and feel they are perfect for me right now.
Yesterday’s reading included the cards you see here, which seemed to reiterate what I’ve been feeling and sharing that indeed I’m still remaining inward throughout the Winter (at least), although back to things here.
It also seemed quite timely with Winter Solstice drawing close and my feeling that I would be doing a larger than normal, sacred and solitary ritual then.
I keep receiving messages from the ancients and ancestors, meaning they are there to call upon and invoke for what is in incubation.
All leading to the dawning of all things new – coinciding with my birthday, within the last month of Winter that ignites a new beginning in numerology, as a #1 year for me.
It’s always fun to receive reiteration for ourselves, focused clarity, and also honest reveals that help us to dig deeper and realize the energy that is really operating under the surface, despite what we think is.
The more I’ve removed myself from life as it was and from the way that was more aligned with others (at least on the outside 😉 ) the more connected and clear I experience, receive, and feel things.
I never feel alone.
The realm we create for ourselves, along with the ways we engage constant communication to All That Is, via the channels that resonate for us, create a support system to realize and remember our own wholeness.
What are the ways in which you create connection? And if you don’t have any currently, what draws you with curiosity or resonance that you could explore and implement?
As we approach Winter Solstice, perhaps you might create some time for your own reflection and find the answers to how you can light up your life in new and more aligned ways.
So many things keep coming up white these days in symbolism – will share on another one tomorrow – although last night was all about the black “seahorses”.
I love the mystical purity of this beautiful image captured by Faye Skyes (perfect name for the photographer who brings us this photo) and shared by Great Smoky Mountains National Park on their Facebook page.
As they share:
“Winter solstice brought a white rainbow to Cades Cove yesterday. The white rainbow, more commonly known as a fog bow, is similar to a rainbow, but appears in fog rather than rain. Because of the very small size of water droplets in fog, a fog bow has only very weak colors. If the water droplets are especially small, and the fog bow appears totally white, then it is called a white rainbow.”
Thank you to another of my sweet friends, William, for sharing this.
Yesterday I took a walk through the San Joaquin Wildlife Sanctuary not far from home. The intentional journey circled around several large ponds and meandered and spiraled through paths lined thick and dense so only what was immediately ahead could be seen because of the constant turns creating blind paths.
This calls forth insight that stems from inner illumination where no more than what is necessary to see in the immediate path is possible or needed – something challenging to embrace when all we want is answers and yet this desire for answers stems from a state of suffering we have decided on some level to allow.
It’s hard to realize that we do not need to know anything but what is before us in this miraculous moment, which we take for granted due to the inability to release ourselves from the bondage of spiraling suffering we have been uncomfortably accustomed to live with, and conditioned in many ways to accept. In some cases, unconsciously perpetuating this for reasons beyond the human emotion’s comprehension. And yet there is an ironic symbiosis to the seeming and frustrating madness.
This called to mind how we are to embrace each step and moment without expectation or attachment, but simply the trust that is imbued with unseen and undefined promise that can take flight at any moment we recognize that our wings were never irreparably broken – they were simply unrealized.
It was a chilly, gray, and somber day that called for silence and an inner stillness that heralded today’s Winter Solstice. Even the birds at the sanctuary were quiet and quite still. They too seemed to embrace the inner world, welcoming the potency of this illuminating darkness.
Life and Winter can seem stark, firm, and cruel. And yet, somehow Nature does it with such grace.
Perhaps our “need” to see something more than the astoundingly crazy beautiful miracle of this very moment, no matter how it appears and feels, is our own created prison. Perhaps our defining beliefs, both personally and collectively accepted, limit our ability to understand the sacred creation at hand. And yes, perhaps our emotional attachments, while so enrapturing, have also placed boundaries on our limitless expansion when they don’t meet desired expectations.
Maybe renewal is already within this very moment…the moment the unconditional light of understanding and inner illumination is lovingly and gently ignited by our true openness to its presence, here and now, accessed within and by our innately powerful selves.
We are encouraged every day by everything around us to understand these simple truths and to embody them as naturally as All That Is around us does.
It is BOTH in the light and the dark, neither or either, and in them, but not of them – simultaneously.
In the attitude of silence the soul finds the path in a clearer light, and what is elusive and deceptive resolves itself into crystal clearness. ~Mahatma Gandhi
In stillness the world is restored. ~Lao Tzu